Two Weeks
by Jana
Summary: AU - Waylon Forge was dead, my parents were leaving town to tend to the funeral, and I was being shipped off to stay with the Cullens for two weeks. Residing with the most reclusive family on the west coast was bound to be an experience I'd never forget.
1. Chapter 1

**Two Weeks**

Chapter One

By: Jana~

XXX

It actually started out as a pretty good day. My truck actually got me all the way to school without stalling, Jessica found someone else to annoy with her inane chatter so that Angela and I could discuss next week's editorial in peace, and I actually didn't injure myself or others in Gym. It wasn't until I got home that things took a turn for… well, not the worse. Just the bizarre.

Mom and Dad were in a weird mood. At least they weren't fighting again, but in truth, that would have almost been better. The fighting I could understand. They always fought. I knew they only stayed together because of me. Once I was out on my own, I knew it would only be a matter of time before I got the call that they were getting a divorce. They really should just do it already. They'd probably both be so much happier.

I'd stay with my mom, of course. Charlie is great, but I have a better relationship with my mom.

But, yeah… I got home, and my parents were sitting on the couch, looking like someone had just died. Turns out, someone had. My dad's best friend – the best man at his wedding, too – had been found in his boat near his place, slaughtered by some animal. We'd known Waylon forever. He played Santa every year for the town's Christmas party. He was a fellow officer on the force with my dad. Even my mom liked him, which was saying something. She doesn't like any of my dad's friends, really, except for Waylon and Billy Black.

They didn't even give me the chance to take my backpack to my room or strip out of my wet jacket. One thing Forks was good for… rain, and lots of it. A sunny day was a rare treat.

I sat on the chair, per my mom's instructions, dripping wet, then just watched as they stared off into space for centuries. Well, it seemed like centuries, what with how tense they were. For a moment, I actually thought they were about to announce their marital separation. But, no, that wasn't the news they were working up to telling me at all.

"Bella, honey, we got some bad news today."

My dad never spoke. Just my mom. She liked Waylon, like I said, but he was really my dad's friend more than hers. He didn't seem to have the ability to speak. He just sat there during the entire conversation, barely even blinking. I'd never seen him so rattled. I almost went to go hug him, but Dad's never really been a hugger, so I stopped myself.

But even with as bad as that news was, the formality of the conversation seemed strange. Like there was another shoe that was about to drop. My parents and friends have always said I am too perceptive for my own good.

"His entire family is out in Virginia, so that's where the funeral is being held."

Okay, so, the other shoe is that we're going to Virginia for a few days?

I shrugged – not because I didn't care, but to show that I was fine with that. "I'm sure my teachers will understand. We're doing the state testing, though, so I'll have to get a makeup date for it."

"No, honey… umm…"

No? What no?

"Your father and I will be going alone. Waylon's family has asked that we come out for a while. Help them with the funeral, the eulogy…"

Oh. Okay. I guess that was alright. I could probably stay with Angela.

"We made arrangements for you to stay with the Cullens for the next two weeks, while we're gone."

Or maybe not. But, the Cullens? I mean, Dr. Cullen was great – I'd seen him enough times during my accident-prone life to know that much – but his kids… Well, no one ever saw them. If it wasn't for the pictures of them in his office, I would swear Dr. and Mrs. Cullen didn't have kids at all.

They were all homeschooled, and they never appeared in public. The rumor around town was that they have some kind of rare skin condition. It was bound to be awkward, but with my dad's grief, and my mom's sullen mood, I didn't feel right arguing. I could survive two weeks of uncomfortable. I'd become a pro at surviving the uncomfortable. After all, Charlie and Renee excelled in creating that kind of atmosphere on a near constant basis.

"Um, okay," I muttered. There really wasn't anything else I could say.

"We're leaving for the airport in an hour," my mom informed me, "so you don't have to pack now if you don't want to. Just take what you need for tonight, and Edward will bring you back tomorrow, after school, to get whatever else you need."

Edward? There's a name you don't hear much. Well, not anymore. Old-fashioned names just aren't in style, even in the tiny town of Forks. Maybe he liked to go by Ed or Eddie.

I nodded stupidly – you know, that kind of head-bobbly thing one does when one has been thrown for a loop – then I stood and headed for my room.

I grabbed just the necessities. Nightclothes, a change for school tomorrow, toiletries, and my laptop. When I got back downstairs, my mom was standing in the entranceway, waiting. Dad hadn't moved from his seat on the couch.

"Edward is right outside, baby," Renee told me. "He's in the silver Volvo."

Ah. Yeah. I'd seen the car when I first pulled into the driveway, parked on the street nearby, and had briefly wondered why it was there. No one in our neighborhood had cars that nice. I saw that someone was sitting inside of it, but with the darkened windows, I couldn't tell who.

My mom hugged me fiercely, like I was going off to college and wouldn't see her for months. It felt… odd. I imagined the emotional scene when I actually did go off to college.

"Be good," she asked of me – a mom's typical words to a child before they went off for a sleepover – then she opened the door for me since my hands were full.

A strange feeling came over me as I carefully took the steps down to the walkway. Like I really was going off to college or something, and wouldn't see my parents again for months. My mom's mood was probably just rubbing off on me.

Dismissing it, I glanced in the direction that I'd seen the Volvo in earlier, and that's when I saw him. Edward, I could only assume, standing beside his car, his hands in his pockets, looking… bored? There really wasn't a single word I could find to describe the expression on his face. Confused, I looked away, down to my feet to make sure they were moving properly. As uncoordinated as I've always been, it would be just my luck that I would face-plant right in front of this guy.

When I looked back up, he was approaching me.

"Hello. I'm Edward Cullen. You're Bella?"

Obviously. And, wow. This guy could be on the radio. He had the smoothest voice I had ever heard. But, no, he was too beautiful for radio. I nodded. Again, stupidly.

"Allow me to help you with that," he offered, reaching for my duffle and laptop bag.

One word came to mind as I handed the items over… formal. Definitely not an Ed or Eddie.

"I was very sorry to hear about Mr. Forge. Were you as close to him as your father was?"

I followed him to his car, watched him place my crap in the trunk, and it was only then that I found my voice to answer him. "Not as close, but he's always been a good family friend."

He closed the trunk lid – effortlessly, yet it still slammed – and then he was facing me. "I'm very sorry for your loss."

I nodded stupidly once again. And then it felt like time didn't make sense as I made my way to the passenger side of his car. I actually startled when he reached past me to open my door. Very formal. I slipped into my seat, and I heard him close my door, but then it seemed like I merely blinked and he was behind the wheel, starting the car.

The drive to his house was strange. His body language was… I don't know… Stiff? His grip on the steering wheel was firm. Intense. And he almost seemed to be in pain. If I didn't know it to be impossible, I would've sworn he wasn't even breathing.

This was going to be the longest two weeks of my life.

His house finally came into view as he traversed the winding trail that led to it. And, okay, I'm not one for materialistic things, but wow. It was huge. The walls were actually made of glass!

We pulled up in front, and then a short blink later and he was at my door, opening it for me. Time was definitely distorted. Maybe I was more rattled by Mr. Forge's death than I thought, or outwardly felt.

"Wait here, please."

I did, only vaguely aware that he was fetching my stuff from the trunk. I felt tense in a way I couldn't ever remember feeling before, but there was no obvious reason for it, other than being out of my element. These people were strangers to me. Yeah, I knew who Dr. Cullen was, I'd seen him enough times at the hospital, but I didn't actually _know_ him. I found myself really wishing I could have stayed with Angela. Maybe I still could. When my mom called to check in, I'd ask her.

"We can go inside now."

His voice shook me from my thoughts. Nodding, I followed him up the steps. A familiar face greeted me as we entered. Dr. Cullen always did have a calming effect. I attributed it to his bedside manner. I'm sure he had to comfort patients all the time.

His smile was kind but reserved.

"Bella, welcome to our home."

"Um, thanks," I said. Then, remembering my manners, I added, "Thank you for having me."

"Not at all."

The beautiful woman who said this was most likely Dr. Cullen's wife. She had a warm welcoming way about her that instantly put me a little at ease.

"Bella, this is my wife, Esme."

Esme? What an unusual name. But, somehow, it seemed to suit her. I tried to smile, but I was sure it looked strained. It felt strained.

"I'm so sorry for your loss, dear."

My warped smile dropped. "Thank you."

"How is your father doing, Bella? I know he and Waylon were good friends."

Before I could answer, I caught Edward shaking his head out of the corner of my eye.

"Yes, well, I'm sure he's very upset."

"Yeah." I replied to Dr. Cullen's comment the only way I knew how. Upset didn't quite describe what my dad looked like. He looked unhinged, in a stoic kind of way. Almost catatonic.

Then I noticed the four people entering the room, just behind the doctor and Esme. Each one of them was more beautiful than the last. A family of models. Great. Staying here for the next two weeks was going to kill my self-esteem, I was sure of it.

That was the thought that kept running through my head as the doctor introduced them.

Alice seemed unusually friendly, like we'd known each other all our lives. The big guy, Emmett, he seemed amused by me. Jasper – another unusual name – kept his distance, like he was almost afraid of me. Then there was Rosalie. She didn't care for me. I came to this conclusion because when she said hello to me, her tone was curt, and her eyes narrowed on me, almost suspiciously, when she did.

Weird. A weird family full of beautiful models. They all seemed related, though the story around town was that they were adopted. They all had the same porcelain white skin, and their eyes were all the same golden brown color. The skin tone was probably due to the skin condition they were all rumored to have, but the eyes? It was an unusual color, anyway, and with them all matching…

"Edward, why don't you take Bella to her room now. Help her get settled in."

Right. Edward. He was standing behind me still, slightly off to the side. I could see him out of my peripheral vision, but I could also sense his presence.

I could hear everyone in the room we had just left, speaking quietly as Edward and I climbed the stairs, but I couldn't make out what was being said. I could imagine, though. My presence was just as awkward for them as being here was for me.

I followed Edward down the hall, more at his side than behind him, until we reached the end. The door to the room in front of us was open, and I could tell as I peeked beyond the jamb that it was lived in. Like, it was someone's room, not just some guest room.

"Um… yeah. This is my room. Your room, for the next two weeks."

Wait. No. I didn't want to uproot anyone.

"You don't have to give up your room," I told him. Then I made the mistake of looking up at him.

Whoa. That's it. Just 'whoa'. My heart literally sputtered into an absurdly fast rhythm. His eyes were _intense_. Like they were trying to stare directly into my soul.

"I don't mind."

I blinked, trying to break eye contact, but found that I couldn't.

"I don't want to be a bother," I whispered. My voice sounded like it was a million miles away.

"You're not being a bother, Bella."

When he said my name, I felt a surge of adrenalin. He said it with such reverence.

"But, where will you sleep?"

He quirked an eyebrow, his expression somewhere between quizzical and amused. But he didn't answer. He just walked into the room and set my things down on his bed. A bed that looked like it hadn't been slept in a day in its life.

I followed him in, apprehensively. The outer walls of his room were glass, too. He had racks of books, a flat, widescreen TV hanging above his desk, and a shelf with a high-tech stereo and an insane amount of CDs. This kid wasn't spoiled or anything. But on a doctor's salary, I guess Dr. Cullen could afford the very best for his family.

On a police chief's salary, I was ecstatic to get an iPod from my parents for Christmas last year. My cell phone and laptop were deemed necessities.

"Is there anything else that you need?"

I needed my heart to stop racing, but since he seemed to be the cause of that, I doubted he could help me there. I shook my head.

"I'll leave you to get settled, then."

I blinked, and I could just make out his retreating form as he disappeared down the hall. How did he keep doing that? Or maybe it was me. Maybe I was blinking weird. I tried it out, but they seemed like normal blinks to me.

I scoffed, shaking my head as I began to wander. The window at the back – not a window, really, but like a door – opened up to the edge of the forest nearby. Ever so carefully, I inched to the edge and looked down. It was quite a drop. I'd break my neck for sure if I fell, but I didn't feel I had the right to close it up. Glad I don't sleepwalk. I've been told that I sleep _talk_, but since I'm always unconscious when I'm asleep, I could only take people's word for it.

The feeling that I didn't belong overwhelmed me as I sat on the edge of the bed. I just knew that sleeping would be impossible. I would be spending the next two weeks staring at a stranger's ceiling, watching the hours pass until the sun came up. I would be useless at school. How long can someone go without sleeping? I guessed I was about to find out.

They left me alone for the two hours that followed. I pulled out my laptop and tried to do some homework, but the strange surroundings made it difficult to concentrate. And then I smelled food. And, God, it smelled amazing. My stomach growled at me, demanding I go investigate.

I figured out how to get to the living room – just a reverse trip from before – but then I had to follow my nose to get to the kitchen.

They were all in there. There was a TV on the counter, tuned to some cooking show they all seemed to be following. I was standing there for seconds only when they all turned to face me, almost in unison. It was… eerie.

"Bella, I hope you're hungry."

My eyes shifted to find the source of the statement. Esme.

I nodded as my stomach growled again. Remembering my manners – something I'd never had to give a second thought to before – I asked, "Is there anything I can do to help?"

Intimidating. That was the word. That's why my manners seemed to be a struggle to find. That's why I felt awkward. These people were intimidating. Not in the 'I'm afraid of them' kind of way, though.

"How very considerate of you to offer," Esme answered, "but you're our guest."

Okay, so that was a no. Was I supposed to just stand there and watch them? Leave the room and come back later? That was the intimidating thing. I didn't know how to act around them. It wasn't just a middle class/upper class conundrum. It was something else entirely.

"Edward, why don't you go see if you can find something on TV for Bella to watch before dinner."

I looked to the floor, uncomfortable. It was then that I noticed the boxes. Empty boxes, but with bright pictures of cookware and dishes on the sides. What, did they go out and buy new pots and pans, just because I was staying here for two weeks?

Edward walked past me then. His body language seemed to be encouraging me to follow him, so I did. I took a seat on the couch, which was facing a flat screen TV like the one in Edward's room, only larger. He sat after I did, also on the couch, but to the farthest edge that he could. Like he couldn't get far enough away from me.

He turned the TV on, but I only watched it blankly. And he wasn't watching it all. He was staring at me.

You know how when you're passing the scene of an accident, and you look, even though you know you won't like what you see? Yeah. That was what it was like. But like an onlooker of a grisly accident, I had to do it.

I turned to stare back, but as soon as I did, his eyes shifted away. He didn't seem embarrassed, like he had averted his eyes because he had been caught, but another explanation escaped me. I turned back to the TV.

Then, a few seconds later, I felt his stare on me again. It was unnerving.

It was about thirty minutes later – or maybe it was a decade… it sure felt like it was – and dinner was ready.

And just when I thought things couldn't get any weirder, they did.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Note:**

Hello! I'm new to this fandom, and a new 'Twilight' fan as well. Please, be gentle (smile).

This fic will be a more 'domesticated' slant on Edward and Bella's love story. Alternative Universe, but with a lot of canon thrown in here and there, just in different ways.

I tried to get everyone in character as much as possible, but Bella specifically might seem just a tad OOC. Sorry about that, but I'm having a blast writing her this way. My beta tells me I have Edward pretty close to spot-on.

Just FYI, but I have **a lot** of this fic already completed – about half, actually – but will only be posting about two chapters per week. Why? Well, to put it simply, I'm a review junkie. I need them to survive, you see, so, the more I get, the faster I post. Wanna see more fast? Please review!

Thanks, and MTLBYAKY

**Shameless Plug:**

I have written my first novel! 'The Mengliad' is available on Amazon, in both paperback and Kindle versions, and the sequel, 'The Registry's Secrets', will be available soon!

**Blurb:**

"There are a lot of beliefs out there. Some people think we got here by spacecraft. Some think we evolved, like Humans, but in a slightly different direction. Some think we were created by God, after Adam and Eve were banished from the Garden of Eden. However we came to be, the truth of the matter is, there are two species that are near-identical in every way that inhabit the Earth. One is Human, one is Mengliad."

What would you do if you learned that there was a separate Human-like species on the planet? Jessica Mitchell is about to be faced with that very question. The strange flu bug she seems to have caught quickly becomes the least of her worries. While on her way home from work, she passes out in Central Park, only to regain consciousness hours later, under the gaze of a kind but odd stranger. This Good Samaritan offers his assistance, and subsequently opens the gate to a world she knows nothing about.

Initially, Jessica is reluctant to believe what Craddock Daniels tells her, but after the unsettling reality sinks in, she feels she has no choice but to follow him and his friends. Changes are taking place, and she is now in danger because of them. Will Craddock be able to protect her? Does Jessica possess the strength to endure all that is happening to her? Can love really blossom under the direst of circumstances?

THE MENGLIAD is a romance adventure novel with a sci-fi flavor. At over 112,000 words, this story evokes a sense of how horrible it would be to have everything you knew pulled from under you.


	2. Chapter 2

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Two

By: Jana~

**XXX**

I was the only one who ate. They had made this elaborate dinner, just for me. It could have easily fed me and the seven of them, but not a one of them joined me. In eating, I mean. They all sat at the table, but they all just watched me.

"Am I the only one who's going to eat?" I finally asked. Everyone but Edward shared odd looks. Rosalie stiffened. Edward continued to stare at the table in front of him.

Okay, what had I just asked? Their reactions didn't fit the question, so I was left to assume that it came out of my mouth wrong. But then Dr. Cullen answered, and I realized it wasn't worded wrong at all.

"We're all on a special diet."

"Bella, after dinner, would you like to play dress up?"

Alice had asked me this. She looked positively giddy with excitement over the prospect. But, dress up? Like, how one might when they're eight and they get into an old trunk in the attic full of ancient formal clothes? The thought of me in a feather boa and a big out-of-date floppy hat almost made me laugh.

But she looked so hopeful, I couldn't find it in me to say no.

"Um, okay. Sure. For a little while, I guess. I have homework to do," I added in explanation.

"That should come first! We can play on the weekend!"

I was a little relieved when she said that, but then she added, "You should have Edward help you with your studies! He's very smart!"

Edward glared at her, but her bright smile remained. I wished they would stop asking him to babysit me. I didn't need a babysitter anyway, and he clearly didn't like the role.

"What's the subject?" he asked.

The subject? My mind drew a blank. I fought to remember… the classroom. Mike Newton sat next to me. Microscopes. We recently dissected a frog.

"Biology!"

Okay, that didn't make me sound like a spaz at all. That excited revelation should have remained inside my head until I could have said the word without undeserved enthusiasm.

He quirked an eyebrow, and my heart started racing again.

"I can help, if you need any."

Struck stupid, I nodded.

I thanked Esme for the meal when I was finished, and offered to help clean up, but like with the making of dinner, she simply stated that I was their guest.

And then I went back up to Edward's bedroom, with him leading the way. He stood still as stone, almost hovering over me, as I opened my laptop and pulled it out of standby.

"What are you studying? What do you need help with?"

"Planaria. And I'm not sure if I do. Need help. It just seemed rude to decline your offer."

His eyes narrowed, but he wasn't angry. I knew he wasn't because I could see the edges of his mouth twitch. He was amused.

"I'm glad I amuse you," I muttered. I wasn't exactly annoyed, but I was something. I just couldn't put my finger on what.

"I apologize," he said. Then he knelt down next to the bed and turned the laptop towards him.

I watched as his graceful fingers scrolled the touchpad mouse to the end of the document.

"This is perfect."

I don't know why, but his compliment made me swell with pride. For some reason, his opinion of me seemed to matter.

"I really don't think you need my help, but I will stay in case you do."

He then gestured towards his rack of books, selected one, and settled in to read it.

Okay, yeah, him being in the room wasn't distracting at all. Luckily, I knew the subject well enough to finish my homework anyway, despite my constantly wandering thoughts.

I took in every detail. The way he held the book in his hands, how fast he finished a page and turned it, the little exhales of breath when he either agreed or disagreed with whatever he had read. I was hyperaware of him. Almost drawn to him.

I closed my laptop and sighed. "The window wall thing makes me nervous. Would you mind closing it?"

It was true, but it was a stall tactic. I just didn't want him to leave. I wanted to talk to him. I wanted _him_ to talk to _me_.

He closed his book without saving his place first, set it back on the rack, then moved to shut the window. When he turned around to face me again, he had that same pained look on his face. The one he wore in the car earlier. It was haunting.

"It's just that, to be able to fall so easily to one's death… it's a bit frightening to the uncoordinated."

I was trying to lighten the mood – anything to get that haunting expression to ease – but it seemed to have the opposite effect. If anything, it seemed to make it worse. More intense.

He nodded, then tucked his hands in his pockets before starting for the door.

"Hey, wait, don't go."

He stopped but he didn't turn around. He also didn't speak. He just stood there, like he was waiting for me to say something further. So I did. Lame as it was, it was the only thing I could think of to say.

"We could just… hang out."

His shoulders squared a little. "Alice wanted to play with you."

There was that word again. Play. They seemed to be about my age, yet they used the word like eight-year-olds. Maybe it was because they were homeschooled? Maybe they didn't know how to act around people of their own age.

"I think that got rescheduled for the weekend," I said. Then I waited. For hours, it seemed. It felt like I was in some kind of time vortex. Time, when in his presence, while in this house, didn't make sense.

"I should really attend to my studies. Excuse me."

And then he was gone. Nothing about this guy made any sense. One moment he was gracious, then he seemed in pain, then he stared at me like I was a curiosity, then he was amused, then he was distant. It was dizzying.

Wanting to understand him better, I began to take stock of his room. What books he had. What music he liked. But that didn't give me any answers. His tastes were all over the map.

Frustrated, I grabbed my iPod out of my backpack and clicked it on, then stuffed the headphones in my ears and reclined on the bed. Within a few minutes, I closed my eyes and let the music soothe my rattled mind.

I didn't fall asleep, but I was so relaxed that, when I felt a touch to my shoulder, I bolted upright. Edward was standing over me, a smirk on his face. I grabbed the cord of my headphones and gave a yank.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to disturb your rest."

"I wasn't asleep," I offered lamely. His smirk grew, and then dropped.

"I just need to know when you would like to leave for school tomorrow morning."

"School starts at eight." Okay, not quite as lame, but still not very brilliant.

"Is seven-thirty acceptable?"

I nodded in that same bobble-head fashion, once again struck stupid.

"What are you listening to?"

A conversation starter. Okay, good. I held up the headphones, and he tentatively took them from my hand. His eyes never left mine as he raised one to his ear. Then he smiled. It was slight, but I could tell it was genuine.

"You like the classics?"

"Depends on my mood," I answered. He gave a little humming sound in response, and I nearly sunk into the stiff, brand new comforter on the bed. "I take it you approve?" I asked. Why did this guy's approval mean so much to me? I'd only known him a handful of hours!

He only smiled back at me, just a tad wider than before, then he walked over to his stereo. He clicked it on, clicked a second button, and then this Heavenly music filled the room. A lone piano, playing the most beautiful song I'd ever heard. Reminiscent of something classical, but it had a hint of modern influence. I closed my eyes to fully appreciate it.

"Do you like it?"

Eyes still closed, I answered, "It's beautiful. Who is it?" I would buy the song from iTunes the second I had the chance to.

"It's an original composition."

Wait. My eyes flew open, locking with his. This guy was beautiful, obviously intelligent, had a voice that could melt frozen butter, _and_ he was an accomplished pianist?

"You wrote this?"

He nodded.

"Are you the one playing it?"

Again, he nodded.

"Are you like some kind of prodigy or something?"

His expression changed with the question. Maybe I was just imagining things – wishful thinking and all that – but it seemed he was as interested in my approval of him as I was of his.

"I have never heard anyone refer to me as such."

How could that be possible? "Your parents don't recognize how talented you are? Your siblings?"

His expression changed again, and his physical stance changed with it. It was like how someone might perk when hearing a distant sound, trying to determine what it was or where it came from.

"They have," he finally answered, "but they're family."

I knew what he meant by that. Parents will take a picture their child draws – something that looks like a mangled whale carcass surrounded by feces – and call it beautiful. Hang it on the fridge like it's a Picasso. Well, okay, people don't usually hang a Picasso on a fridge, but still.

"Well, trust me, they're not just paying you lip service. You should be playing Carnegie Hall!"

He rewarded my compliment with the brightest smile I had ever seen. Then he took a seat on the floor, like he had when I was doing my homework, and settled in. Okay, now we were making some progress.

"Where did you learn to play?"

He scowled. Uh oh. That was a step backwards, it seemed. But then he perked again like he was listening for something in the distance.

"Private lessons."

With his answer came a slight smile. Okay, we were back on track.

"Well, you either had a very good teacher, or you truly are a prodigy."

Okay, I was laying it on a little thick, but I wanted to see him smile again.

The song ended, and then another one began. It was as beautiful as the first.

"Another one of yours?"

"Yes."

"How many songs have you written?"

"Hundreds."

When I gasped, his scowl returned. One step forward, one step backward. I felt like we were just spinning in circles.

"Sorry," I said, "but that's just very impressive. How old are you?"

Maybe he wasn't my age after all, though he sure seemed to be. If I had to take a guess, I'd say he was no older than nineteen.

"Seventeen," he answered.

Okay, quick math check. Hundreds of songs – plural – so that would be at least two hundred. If he started playing at a very young age, he might get good enough to start composing by… what? Eight? Nine? I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. Nine years of composing, divided by two hundred songs… That was about twenty-two songs a year. Very impressive.

And he was my age, exactly, yet he acted much older. Almost as if he had grown up in a different era. I was going to figure this guy out or die trying.

"Is that why you're homeschooled?"

Shit. Another scowl. Well, if I was going to figure him out, I'd have to ask some questions that would likely gain me that reaction. Better get used to it.

"I don't understand your question."

"It's not like Forks High has much to offer the gifted. Their Honors program is barely a challenge for _me_, and I suspect you're smarter than I am."

Ah, a smile. Good. I liked the steps forward.

"One of the reasons, yes."

"What are some of the other reasons?" I asked. Maybe the rumors were true. Maybe he did have some kind of odd skin condition. His skin did seem a bit alabaster.

His mouth moved ever so slightly, like he was speaking, but no sound came out. Well, no, there was a sound, but no words came out. The sound was like a light breeze had just moved through the room. A breeze that couldn't be felt.

Suddenly, Dr. Cullen was at the door. "Son, may I speak with you for a moment?"

Edward almost seemed glad for this interruption. I couldn't say I felt the same.

Nodding, Edward stood, then very formally informed me, "I'll be ready at seven-thirty tomorrow morning, to drive you to school."

And then they were both gone. And, okay, I was probably just imagining things again, but it almost seemed as if Dr. Cullen was _saving_ Edward. Saving him from what, I didn't know. Me? The conversation?

Another song was playing on his stereo then. Another beautiful composition, with an almost haunting melody. I set my iPod and laptop on the floor and climbed more fully onto the bed. I wasn't planning to sleep, so I didn't get under the covers. I just wanted to sink into the music before getting ready for bed.

Next thing I knew, my cell phone's alarm was going off.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Note:**

Sorry for the time it took in posting this chapter. My beta-reader went MIA – she has a life and all, unlike me – and I was uncomfortable posting without a safety net. My 21 year old daughter helped me out this time. If she/we/I missed anything, I apologize.

This chapter is a bit shorter than the first. Sorry about that.

See, the thing is, when I first started writing this fic, I had no idea if I was going to be able to do anything with it. I'd tried writing 'Twilight' fics a few times, but couldn't make them work. I assumed the same would happen with this story, but I didn't want to ignore the possibility. So, I just started writing it for my own amusement. Within forty-eight hours, I had over twenty-five thousand words. Now, ten days later, I have almost sixty thousand words.

I never gave thought to chapter breaks initially, is my point. When I realized I had something worth posting, I went back through the story and created breaks the best I could. So, the chapters will all be various sizes, ranging from twenty-five hundred words to over four thousand words. Sorry for the inconsistency of that.

Thanks to those who reviewed, both here and in email. Remember, the more reviews I receive, the faster I post the next chapter. (smile)

MTLBYAKY

**Shameless Plug:**

I have written my first novel! 'The Mengliad' is available on Amazon, in both paperback and Kindle versions, and the sequel, 'The Registry's Secrets', will be available soon!

**Blurb:**

"There are a lot of beliefs out there. Some people think we got here by spacecraft. Some think we evolved, like Humans, but in a slightly different direction. Some think we were created by God, after Adam and Eve were banished from the Garden of Eden. However we came to be, the truth of the matter is, there are two species that are near-identical in every way that inhabit the Earth. One is Human, one is Mengliad."

What would you do if you learned that there was a separate Human-like species on the planet? Jessica Mitchell is about to be faced with that very question. The strange flu bug she seems to have caught quickly becomes the least of her worries. While on her way home from work, she passes out in Central Park, only to regain consciousness hours later, under the gaze of a kind but odd stranger. This Good Samaritan offers his assistance, and subsequently opens the gate to a world she knows nothing about.

Initially, Jessica is reluctant to believe what Craddock Daniels tells her, but after the unsettling reality sinks in, she feels she has no choice but to follow him and his friends. Changes are taking place, and she is now in danger because of them. Will Craddock be able to protect her? Does Jessica possess the strength to endure all that is happening to her? Can love really blossom under the direst of circumstances?

THE MENGLIAD is a romance adventure novel with a sci-fi flavor. At over 112,000 words, this story evokes a sense of how horrible it would be to have everything you knew pulled from under you.


	3. Chapter 3

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Three

By: Jana~

**XXX**

I tweaked an eye open… Sunlight! It was morning! I bolted upright, pushed the ignore button to stop the annoying sound of my alarm, then grabbed for my duffle. Did I have enough time to take a shower? I had meant to take one the night before! I mentally shrugged as I hurriedly pulled my clothes from the bag. One 'dirty day' wouldn't kill me.

With my change of clothes and my toiletry bag in hand, I stepped into the hall. But then I stopped cold. I had no idea where the bathroom was, and opening doors until I found it didn't seem like a very good idea.

How had I not used the bathroom since arriving here?

"Morning, Bella!"

I spun around. Alice! She was on the stairs, a few steps from the landing. "Alice, hi, um, where's the bathroom?"

"Second door on the left. Hungry? Esme was planning to make you breakfast."

Esme? I mean, yeah, that was her name, but her kids called her that instead of 'Mom'? I tried that on my parents once and they grounded me for a week. They said it was disrespectful. I couldn't understand why. It wasn't like I was trying to call them something derogatory. Charlie and Renee were their names.

"Um, sure, thanks. But don't go to any trouble or anything. Just toast, or Poptarts or something."

"Oh, that's far too simple for Esme! She _loves_ to cook! And breakfast _is_ the most important meal of the day!"

This girl was far too chipper, especially first thing in the morning. With her slight build and pixie face, she almost seemed like a twelve-year-old, but somehow, I knew she was much older. At least sixteen.

"Come on down when you're ready!"

Poof and she was gone. I checked my blinking again. Status quo. Weird.

I made quick work of getting ready. Luckily, I've never been a girly-girl when it comes to clothes or makeup, or hair for that matter. Simple headband, a little eye shadow, my love-worn jeans and cream colored top, long-sleeved with the holes for my thumbs to slip through, and I was ready. I would brush my teeth after breakfast.

I left my toothbrush and toothpaste on the counter, then I gathered up the rest of my crap and threw it back in the bag. But I left it there. I would return it to the duffle once everything was said and done.

I near about ran down the stairs. Thankfully, I only stumbled once, and I caught my balance before I could inflict injury upon myself.

I couldn't believe my eyes as I stepped into the kitchen. There, on the island counter, was a complete meal only seen in commercials. French toast, syrup in a cute little glass bottle, butter on a plate designed to hold that particular condiment, powdered sugar in a bowl with a spoon beside it… cubed melon… glass of milk… glass of orange juice… linen napkin with a fork, spoon, and knife sitting atop it.

Wow. And once again, it appeared that I would be the only one eating. Yeah, Dr. Cullen said they were all on a special diet, but presumably they would have to consume something at some point.

At least I didn't have an audience. The only person in the room was Esme, but she left almost as soon as I sat down.

I ate a little bit of everything, mostly to avoid being rude, but there was no way I could eat all that. And I was in a hurry. I wondered where Edward was. Maybe he was waiting in the car? I needed to hurry, then.

I rinsed my plate, set it in the sink, then ran back up the stairs to brush my teeth.

Having tucked all my belongings back into the duffle, I bolted for the stairs, backpack slung over one shoulder, iPod in hand.

Three steps down and, sure enough, my feet decided to be mutinous. This was going to be bad, I realized, in the flash of a second. But then, out of nowhere, I was being held.

Edward. He had caught me before I killed myself. Had he been on the stairs? I didn't see him there when I started down them.

"Um, thanks," I muttered, embarrassed. "Your dad was about to make a house call in his own home."

I looked up at him then. His expression shocked me. He looked stern.

"You should be more careful."

Was he mad at me for tripping over my own feet? It was then that something occurred to me. I was in his arms.

Blushing, I looked away. "Yeah, so I've been told."

He released me then, and I suddenly felt very hollow inside. I didn't have time to ponder the reason why, though. I was running late now, and Edward was heading for the door. I followed, grabbing my jacket off the bench in the foyer before I stepped out into the cold morning.

More steps. Excellent. I didn't trip this time, thankfully. I looked up once I was on solid ground, to see Edward standing by his car, holding the passenger door open for me. Now he was smiling. This guy had mood swings like a PMSing woman.

I thanked him as I slipped inside, then with the quickness that I knew I would never become accustomed to, he was beside me in the driver's seat. It almost felt as if I moved in slow motion in comparison.

He said nothing as he drove. He didn't even acknowledge me when I told him I was cold. He just reached over and flipped on the heater.

Minutes later, and my teeth had finally stopped chattering. "Okay, I think I'm warm enough." I moved to flip the heater off, but so did he, at the exact same moment. Our hands brushed, and I gasped.

My God, his hand was _cold_! I mean, so were mine, but next to his temperature, mine felt like I'd had it resting on a heating pad for the past three hours.

Then he seemed in pain again. He stared ahead at the road, almost looking like a statue, and his grip of the steering wheel tightened. So much so that it almost seemed to bend a little in his grasp.

It was the most uncomfortable I had ever been in his presence. Luckily, five minutes later, we were at Forks High. I thanked him for the ride, but he just stared through the windshield.

"When should I return to pick you up?"

He _sounded_ like he was in pain.

"Um, school lets out at three."

"Do you have after school activities?"

"No," I answered.

"Oh my God, there you are!"

Jessica. Great.

"I'll be here at three," he said. Then he finally looked at me.

Don't ask me how I knew, but he wanted me to close my door. So I did. He sped off instantly, way faster than is technically allowed within the school's parking lot.

"Did you hear about Mr. Forge? Of course you did! He was your dad's best friend!"

I could tell she was walking briskly to get to me, almost to me, but I just watched the silver Volvo as it left the property.

"Who was that?"

I answered without even thinking. "Edward Cullen."

"Oh my God, no way!"

Shit. I had just provided the school's biggest gossip with the juiciest news of the century.

"Um, yeah…" I started for the stairs that led to the building my first class was in. She followed. "My parents left town for Waylon's funeral, so I'm staying with the Cullens."

That was all she was getting out of me, so I hope she enjoyed it.

"You've got to tell me _everything_!"

Yeah, no I didn't. "There's not much to tell. Nice family. You've met Dr. Cullen before, right? When you got your stitches last year?"

"Well, yeah, but what are his kids like?"

Keep fishing, Jess. See how far it gets you. "They're nice, too."

"Are the rumors true? Do they really have a weird, gross skin condition?"

Nice. Very tasteful. I fought to not roll my eyes. "It would have been rude of me to ask such a question."

"Well, yeah, sure, but, did you _see_ a skin condition?"

The building was warm, as per usual, so I stripped off my jacket as I shifted my backpack from one hand to the other. "Medical conditions aren't always visible, Jess. Aren't you going to be late for class?"

She checked her watch, a horrified look coming over her as she realized the time. "Okay, but I'm sitting with you at lunch!"

Yay. Lucky me. I rolled my eyes and entered my classroom. Maybe I could find a place to hide during lunch. If it wasn't raining, I could slip away to just inside the forest's edge. Students weren't technically supposed to do that, but I didn't care. I sometimes went there just to have some alone time, anyway. Escape seemed like just as good a reason.

Angela looked at me with a sympathetic expression as I approached our adjoined desks.

"I heard about Mr. Forge. How's your dad doing?"

At least the pity wasn't directed at me. "He's… okay, I guess. He and Mom went to Virginia for the funeral."

"You're all alone in the house?"

She sounded concerned. "Um, no, I'm staying with the Cullens."

That was one thing I liked about Angela. She wasn't a gossip. She didn't pry or badger.

"That's nice of them."

"Yeah, it is," I said. Then I remembered that I was going to ask her if I could stay with her. But I couldn't bring myself to do it. I had a mystery to crack, anyway, and the Cullens were being very gracious and hospitable hosts.

The bell rang, the teacher called the class to order, and that was the end of the discussion.

Lunchtime. Not that I would be eating. If I stepped into the cafeteria, Jessica would assault me, and there was just no way I could put up with her for an entire forty-five minutes. Three minutes before first period had been more than enough time spent with her for one day.

It wasn't exactly raining. More like drizzling. Still, I was bound to get wet. I didn't care. The trees usually provided a little cover from the elements, anyway.

I made my way to the forest edge, then snuck in a little ways. My favorite tree sat waiting for me. Pulling my iPod from my backpack, I scrolled through the menu to find a song in specific. It usually calmed me, and I needed a good sense of calm.

Wait. What songs were these? They weren't even titled, just numbered. All my songs had titles. Names.

I clicked on the first one and stuffed my earbuds into my ears. I recognized it instantly. It was one of Edward's compositions. But how did it get onto my iPod?

I rolled my eyes as it dawned on me. I could be so slow sometimes. He put them on it, probably when I was asleep. That was… nice of him. Maybe I should have been appalled that he had taken my property and done what he wished with it, but I wasn't.

Closing my eyes, I settled my head back against the trunk and let his music soothe me. Two songs in, and my eyes flew open. It felt like I was being watched. But when I looked around me, nothing seemed amiss at all.

It should have creeped me out, this feeling of being watched, but actually, it was almost comforting. I closed my eyes again.

My cell phone started vibrating a few minutes later. An incoming text message. I fished it out of my pocket, then rolled my eyes when I saw who it was from.

"Where R U? Get 2 the cafeteria! We have 2 talk!"

God, Jessica loved exclamation marks. She used them in her voice when she spoke, in text messages, even in notes she passed me during class.

"There are other forms of punctuation, Jess." I said this to no one, obviously, but I could have sworn I heard a chuckle in response. I looked around again. And again, nothing.

I responded to her message with a simple, "Last second homework," then clicked 'send' and pushed my phone back into my pocket. If she texted again, I would just say I didn't get it. Forks was notorious for iffy cell phone service.

The thirty-three minutes – I deducted six minutes for walk time, both ways – flew by. That was, I'm sure, because of _his_ music. It wasn't just pretty to listen to. It was complex. I found myself trying to determine what mood he must have been in when he composed each song. No easy task. Not only because I didn't know him very well, but because he seemed deep in a way that was puzzling.

Disappointed that I would have to endure the next three periods before I could see him again, I sighed as I clicked off my iPod. I shoved it in my backpack, pushed to standing, and headed out of the forest.

I made it just as the bell rang. Luckily, Mr. Molina wasn't a hard-ass about such things. He always turned the other way if one of his students was a few minutes late.

And then the rest of the day dragged on. Another wink of praise from Mr. Molina for my obviously accurate homework assignment, no injuries or deaths in Gym, another boring essay due Monday in English. At least I would have the weekend to complete it. I would have to schedule my play date with Alice around it. I smirked at that.

I could really come to like Alice, even though she was far too happy to be considered normal. There was just something infectious about her.

I pulled my jacket on before leaving the building, anxious to get outside and see Edward again. But, of course, things are never quite that simple.

"Was it the biology homework you had to do during lunch?"

Oh joy. Jessica had tracked me down. "No. I finished that up last night."

"English, then? I'm assuming you didn't have homework from Gym."

Okay, so that narrowed my choices down. English it is. "Yeah, English. Just a few questions, but I knew I would get distracted at lunch, and then wouldn't get to it."

"Okay, so, dish!"

Right for it. Figures. "Plate, spoon, knife." I was being a smart-ass, but it might buy me some time. If I could get to Edward's car before she asked too much, I might just be able to avoid her inanity for another day. I pushed out the door, but of course she followed right behind.

"Ha, ha. I'm being serious!"

"There's nothing to dish," I stated flatly. There, right where he had dropped me off that morning, was his silver Volvo. Salvation was just a few steps away.

"Oh, come on! You're on the inside! There has to be _something_ juicy to share!"

Still with the exclamation marks, but at least she lowered her voice the closer we got to his car. I didn't want him to think me rude for talking about him and his family behind their backs.

"There really isn't." God, why couldn't I move any faster? Of course, if I tried to… the image of my inevitable face-plant almost made me shudder.

"Bells! Come _on_! Just one little thing!"

I hated it when she called me that. I barely tolerated it from my dad, and he was responsible for my existence.

"Fine," I said, now within reaching distance of the door. He hadn't stepped out to open it for me. Weird. "Mrs. Cullen is an excellent cook."

With that I yanked the door open, slipped inside, and slammed it shut, all while she just glared at me. Apparently, dish about Mrs. Cullen's cooking abilities wasn't what she was hoping to learn.

"Did you have a good day at school?"

What a fatherly thing to ask. "Typical," I replied. I clicked my seatbelt, then looked over at him. He was smiling again. Oh, that felt good. I found myself smiling along with him.

Then we were off. Way too fast. God, he was going to hit a kid if he wasn't careful. But, of course, he didn't. Which was good for the obvious reasons, and for one other unobvious one. I was hoping to spend the day with _him_, not at the hospital or police station.

"Jessica seems… nice."

"Yeah, seems," I muttered. Then something hit me. How did he know her name? "Do you know her or something?" I asked.

"No."

"Then, how did you know her name?"

He tensed again. Great. Everything I asked him seemed to set him off.

"My father treated her last year… six stitches… after she was hit in the head with a badminton racket."

Oh, great. Yeah, I guess the whole town would know about that. Maybe he didn't know it was me who accidentally inflicted that particular injury upon her.

"Oh."

The road in front of us became as important to me as it seemed to be to him. But we weren't heading for his house.

"Where are we going?"

"Your house, so you can retrieve more of your personal effects. I'm assuming you don't want to wear the same two outfits for the next two weeks."

Oh, right. I knew that. "Not so much," I said.

And then we both fell silent. It wasn't until we were minutes from my house, that my iPod came to mind.

"Thanks for the music. It was a lifesaver today. Jessica was on my last nerve."

He laughed. Oh, yeah, that was a _good_ sound. It almost made me feel euphoric.

"You're welcome. The forest is a great place to enjoy soothing music."

Whoa. Wait a sec. How did he know…? Or, maybe it was just a statement of fact. It was hard to tell by the inflection he had used. How would I even ask him, though? 'Oh, hey, by the way, were you spying on me? Is that how you knew I was in the forest today?'

Then I visibly startled. It felt like I was being watched while in the forest.

"Is something wrong?"

But how was that even possible? When I had looked around, I saw no sign of anyone. Not him, not anyone.

"Bella?"

Oh. He was talking to me. "Hmm?"

"Are you all right? You startled just now."

Okay, I needed to get a grip. This was just my overactive imagination working overtime. He wasn't in the forest today. It didn't make sense that he would be. Besides, I would have seen him.

"Shivered," I lied. It wasn't particularly cold, so I wasn't sure if he'd buy that. If he didn't, he didn't call me on it.

"Would you like me to wait in the car?"

Oh. We were in front of my house. "You can come in," I answered.

I watched him closely that time. I stared at him, unblinking, as he left the car, walked around to my side, and then opened my door for me. Okay, definitely my overactive imagination. He moved at a completely normal speed.

The house seemed almost eerie. I'd been at home alone a million times before, but this was different. My parents weren't just at work or running errands. They were _gone_.

I shook the thought from my head and started up the stairs. Then I realized Edward wasn't following. He was standing by the door, watching me.

"You can come," I told him. He immediately moved to join me.

I was tense as I entered my room, but it took me a few seconds to determine why. I had never had a man in my room before. But then my mood shifted to something that more closely resembled excitement. Edward was in my room!

Suddenly, I felt like a young child, having a friend over for the first time. I had to stop myself from sharing my boring life with him, one insignificant item at a time.

Instead, I pulled my suitcase out from under my bed and started throwing clothes into it.

"You like purple."

It wasn't a question, but it wouldn't have confused me any less if it had been. I blinked up at him. His eyes drifted away from mine, and I followed the line of sight.

Oh. He was referring to my purple bed sheets. "Um, yeah, it's my favorite color." There was an opening, so I took it. "You have a favorite color?"

"Blue."

Okay, that covered about a million options. "Sky? Royal? Cerulean?"

He smirked. "Colonial."

"Hmm." That's it. I hummed. Then I went back to packing.

Why was it so hard to get a conversation moving with this guy?

I flitted about, grabbing this and that. My journal. My digital camera. A few extra headbands. My cell phone charger. My battery was already running low. I would have to charge it tonight.

I threw these miscellaneous items into my suitcase, on top of my haphazardly flung in clothes, and slammed the lid shut. As soon as I clicked the locks, he reached past me to grab it.

I followed him down the stairs and out the door, but paused before closing and locking it. Looking back inside, I felt a sense of longing come over me.

"Two weeks isn't so long."

I shook my head as I turned to face him. Compassionate eyes met mine. Not just compassion, but intense empathy, like he was feeling my pain right along with me.

I couldn't hold his gaze. It was too much, like it magnified my own feelings.

"I know. And thanks."

Again, he put my suitcase in the trunk. Again, he held my door open for me. And again, he was in the driver's seat much too quickly.

We were halfway to his house before either of us spoke again.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

Hmmm. No reviews at all for chapter two. Perhaps this is an indication that the story sucks?

Well, I'll post a few more chapters. See if things pick up.

Everyone excited about Eclipse coming out next week? I'm just about ready to explode, I'm _that_ excited! I'm doing The Twilight Experience. All three released movies in a row! Does it get any better than that?

Don't forget to review, please. I won't know to continue if you don't.

Thanks, and MTLBYAKY

**Shameless Plug:**

I have written my first novel! 'The Mengliad' is available on Amazon, in both paperback and Kindle versions, and the sequel, 'The Registry's Secrets', will be available soon!

**Blurb:**

"There are a lot of beliefs out there. Some people think we got here by spacecraft. Some think we evolved, like Humans, but in a slightly different direction. Some think we were created by God, after Adam and Eve were banished from the Garden of Eden. However we came to be, the truth of the matter is, there are two species that are near-identical in every way that inhabit the Earth. One is Human, one is Mengliad."

What would you do if you learned that there was a separate Human-like species on the planet? Jessica Mitchell is about to be faced with that very question. The strange flu bug she seems to have caught quickly becomes the least of her worries. While on her way home from work, she passes out in Central Park, only to regain consciousness hours later, under the gaze of a kind but odd stranger. This Good Samaritan offers his assistance, and subsequently opens the gate to a world she knows nothing about.

Initially, Jessica is reluctant to believe what Craddock Daniels tells her, but after the unsettling reality sinks in, she feels she has no choice but to follow him and his friends. Changes are taking place, and she is now in danger because of them. Will Craddock be able to protect her? Does Jessica possess the strength to endure all that is happening to her? Can love really blossom under the direst of circumstances?

THE MENGLIAD is a romance adventure novel with a sci-fi flavor. At over 112,000 words, this story evokes a sense of how horrible it would be to have everything you knew pulled from under you.


	4. Chapter 4

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Four

By: Jana~

**XXX**

"Esme is making Italiano for you tonight. She hopes you're hungry."

Hopes. Present tense. But he hadn't been in contact with his mom since I got into the car back at school. He was never out of my sight after that.

"When did you speak with your mom?"

"I'm sorry?"

It wasn't an apology, it was a question, like he was confused over mine.

"You said 'hopes', like she's currently having that thought."

He tensed. "She mentioned it before I left today."

It was little things like that, that caught my attention. Maybe I was being stupid for dwelling on them, but they seemed noteworthy somehow.

"I am. Hungry."

"She will be pleased."

I didn't doubt that. The woman obviously loved to cook, but since her family was apparently on a special diet, she probably didn't get to do it often.

"What kind of special diet are you on?" I asked.

He tensed again. "It's… complicated."

How complicated could it possibly be? I wasn't an idiot. "I'm sure I can keep up," I told him, not allowing him to dodge it that easily.

It took twenty-two years for him to answer. "It's a sort of… liquid diet."

Sort of. The mysteries just kept on coming.

We turned onto the long winding road that led to his house then, so I dropped it.

We pulled up in front, and like a flash, he was at my door, opening it. Then, when we got inside, he helped me take my jacket off. This guy was certainly gentlemanly. It was refreshing, really. All the guys at school thought they were doing you a favor just by breathing. Ah, the ego of the male teenager.

The house smelled like a restaurant. An Italian restaurant. My stomach growled in anticipation of what Esme was preparing.

"Dinner will be ready shortly," he said.

What, was he a mind reader? Could he hear my growling hunger? It certainly didn't seem that loud to me. I didn't hear it so much as feel it, and I was clearly closer to it.

"I will go get your suitcase now, and bring it to your room."

Right. The suitcase. I nodded, then watched him leave before heading for the stairs. I was barely through the door, and there he was, entering with my lone piece of luggage.

Okay, this time, I knew it wasn't my imagination playing tricks on me.

"How did you get up here so fast?"

His eyes widened, and then they just sort of… dropped. He almost closed them. It was as if he was berating himself for something.

"I didn't want to make you wait."

Okay, but that didn't really answer my question. "Time doesn't seem to make sense when I'm around you. Little things, like just now, with the suitcase. It's as if you can move faster than what would be considered normal."

Apparently, that was the wrong thing to say, because he huffed and stormed off. I was starting to think that this guy really did hate me, deep down, and was only being nice to me because his parents had asked him to be.

But, no, that couldn't be true. There were other moments… When he laughed. When he looked at me with so much compassion it was almost frightening. It was only when I asked certain questions that he seemed to hate me. Okay, so, maybe he was just a really private guy. Or, maybe, he had secrets. People tended to get all paranoid and weird when they were keeping secrets.

Making mental notes, I thought back to the few conversations we'd had. All the moments he tensed or flinched, or seemed angry or panicked.

I puzzled over it for a while, analyzing every one of his reactions, but they still didn't make any sense. I was so busy with this mental task, that I didn't realize he was standing in the doorway watching me… until he cleared his throat.

"Dinner is ready."

Oh, fantastic. Now I was blushing because dinner was ready? Or maybe it was because he had just caught me in deep contemplation. Well, at least he couldn't know what was going on inside my head. Unless he really was a mind reader.

No, his return expression didn't support that theory. If he knew what I was thinking, he would either be annoyed or amused. Or both. He seemed capable of many different emotions at once.

I gave a nod, then stood and followed him to the dining room.

Okay, did they think I was royalty or something? This was much too elaborate for just _me_.

And, again, it was just me. They all just sat there, watching. All except Dr. Cullen. He was on shift at the hospital.

Unnerved by the weird attention, I announced with all the respect I could muster, "You know, you don't have to sit here. I'm sure you all have better things to do than watch me eat."

Rosalie left first, followed quickly by Emmett. Then Jasper stood, but he waited for Alice before walking away. They seemed like a couple, actually. Alice and Jasper. Rosalie and Emmett, too, kind of. Weird, but if they weren't related, there wasn't anything illegal about it.

The only one in this family not _with_ someone, was Edward. Or maybe he was. Maybe his girlfriend just didn't live with them.

Esme got up next. She smiled warmly at me before walking away. I expected Edward would follow, but he just remained seated where he was.

"You can go too, if you want," I told him.

"I know," he said, but he stayed.

So maybe he didn't hate me after all.

"Sorry about before," I said, after I swallowed the bite I had been currently chewing. Man, I was going to miss eating like this. My mom was an okay cook, but mac-n-cheese compared to _this_? Sorry, there was just no comparison. "I didn't mean anything bad by it," I continued. "I just found it interesting."

"I'm sorry for leaving you with the impression that I was angry."

"You weren't?"

"No."

That seemed to be a lie. I didn't call him on it, though. I had lied to him earlier, and if he knew I had, he had extended me that same courtesy.

"So, still friends?" I asked. Were we that? I wasn't sure what we were.

He smiled. Okay, maybe we were friends.

I hurriedly finished my meal then. I wanted to get my math homework out of the way so that I could maybe – _maybe_ – have another conversation with Edward. I wanted answers. I wasn't so sure I'd get them, but I had to try.

Maybe he would help me if I asked him to. Not that I needed help. Math was the easiest subject of them all. But I could play stupid for a bit. Let him _teach_ me, and then while he was, I could slip in a few questions. Maybe he would feel a sense of obligation to stay if he was helping me, even if I annoyed him. This was a good plan.

"Are you any good at math?" I asked.

He smirked. Okay, he definitely wasn't a mind reader. Or maybe he was, and was amused by my obvious attempt to trap him. Just when I thought I had a piece of the puzzle solved, it turned out it wasn't solved at all.

"Yes."

Maybe that should have seemed arrogant, answering 'yes' so absolutely, but from him, it didn't.

"I have some math homework tonight…"

Would he take the bait and offer his assistance? If he didn't, I would ask him.

"I can help."

Excellent. I shoveled my food.

I plopped down on his bed and quickly pulled my folder out of my backpack. He stood over me for a moment, then dropped to his knees nearby, gracefully. This man had the grace of a dancer.

I located the pathetic worksheet and handed it over to him. Okay, I really didn't think this through. Clearly, anyone with half a brain cell could figure this stuff out.

He looked it over for a moment, then leaned in as he set it on the bed in front of me.

Okay, screw thinking things through. His nearness was intoxicating. Well, since I'd never been intoxicated, I could only guess what that might feel like. But if it was even close to this dizzying sensation, I could see why people became alcoholics.

And for the next twenty minutes, he was my teacher. He went through every question with me, asked what I should do next in each step of each equation. And he did all this without condescension.

I was so wrapped up in it all, I had forgotten to ask one single question. Well, so much for _that_. But I couldn't regret it. It was time well spent.

When we were finished, I considered asking for his help on my English essay, just so that he wouldn't leave, but it proved unnecessary. There was no indication that he was planning on it. He settled back onto his legs, still on his knees, and stared at me.

So, I braved forward. If he truly wasn't mad about my earlier question, maybe he would answer if I asked it again.

"I would love to know how you can move that fast. It wasn't just with the suitcase. I've noticed it a few times."

He hummed. A sweet melodic sound that instantly put me at ease.

"I'm more interested in your theories."

"I don't have any theories," I answered honestly.

"It never occurred to you that you might just be imagining this… abnormal speed I supposedly possess?"

"At first. I even thought I might be blinking strangely. But, nope. I'm not. It's you, I'm sure of it."

He smirked. "Are you now?"

Okay, he was playing with me.

"Yes. Pretty sure," I added.

"Pretty sure? There's room for doubt."

"You're really not going to tell me?" I asked.

His smirk dropped just a little. "You must really enjoy disappointment."

What the hell was that supposed to mean? Scowling, I muttered, "Not as a general rule, no."

"Then why create fantastical nonsense? The truth will certainly be disappointing."

"Yeah, see, you're trying to convince me that there's nothing to this, but I know there is."

He stood then, and at first I thought I had crossed a line – made him angry again – but if he was upset with me, it didn't reach his eyes. They crinkled with amusement.

"Come up with a theory, and we'll have this conversation again."

Then he left. Very slowly. It was almost like he was mocking me by doing so.

If he wanted to play, I was game. He was messing with the wrong girl now. I wasn't the type to back down from a challenge.

Determined, I yanked my laptop onto the bed, opened it and pulled it out of standby, then a few clicks later, and I was on the internet. Sweet. WI-FI.

Okay, what did I know? What were the facts? Anything, even if it was insignificant. Speed. Cold hands. Pale complexion. Liquid diet. Accomplished pianist. Highly intelligent. Abnormal eye color. Weird mood swings. Intense empathy. The ability to read minds? Maybe not, but it wouldn't hurt to throw that in there.

I searched for hours. I searched all the facts. I searched them all at the same time and separately. I searched them in combinations. The best I could come up with was superhero crap. The stuff of legends found in comic books. Oh, and vampire crap. But nothing that logically explained things.

And now it was late, and I still hadn't taken a shower. I wasn't going to school dirty two days in a row. I gave up, grabbed my nightclothes and toiletry bag, and headed for the hall.

Maybe I should ask if I could take a shower first? Maybe the running water would interrupt someone's sleep? It wasn't _that_ late, but my instilled manners demanded I not just jump in without being sure.

I descended the stairs, crap in hand, intent on asking the first person I came across.

Esme. Okay, good. Esme was very sweet.

"Um, excuse me, Mrs. Cullen? I was wondering if it would be okay if I took a shower?"

"Of course, dear. You don't even need to ask. We want you to feel at home here."

I smiled, a bit sheepishly, then headed back up the stairs.

The shower felt amazing, in part because I sorely needed one, but also because their bathroom was as grand as the rest of their house. The showerhead had eight different settings, from a mere trickle like rain to a pounding massage. I tried each one of them, just to say I did.

I dried off, combed out my wet hair, brushed my teeth, got dressed for bed, then headed that way. I was set to close my laptop and relocate it to the floor when something hit me. Something was wrong. Okay, maybe not _wrong_, but, just, not right. Looking around the room, I tried to decide what it was, but nothing seemed out of place. The window wall thing was closed. No one was in there with me.

Then, finally, it occurred to me. My laptop hadn't gone into automatic standby. I was in the shower way too long for it not to have done so. The only way it wouldn't have, was if someone was using it.

And I had a pretty good guess who that someone was.

I flipped the laptop closed, set it on the floor, then climbed into bed and under the covers. But I didn't even try to go to sleep. Not yet. I just stared at the ceiling, contemplating my next course of action.

He obviously saw that I was hitting dead ends. I'd had several different windows opened, all with the gibberish I had found. He was probably feeling so smug right then, wherever he was.

Again, it didn't even dawn on me that I should feel somehow violated that he'd used my property without permission. I was just annoyed that I was losing our game.

With how I was feeling, I wouldn't be able to nod off for a year. And I did need sleep. Friday was usually test day, though not the state testing. That would start on Tuesday.

I knew what would relax me. It seemed weird that I would use _his_ music to calm me down, when it was _him_ who had me all worked up in the first place. Whatever. If I used my iPod, he would never know. I wasn't about to give him the satisfaction of knowing.

I grabbed my iPod, then made sure my alarm was set on my cell phone. Oh! Right. I needed to charge that. After I set that up, I shoved my earbuds in place and located the first numbered track he had added to my list of songs.

I guess I was really tired, because the next thing I knew, I was waking up in a dark room, my iPod no longer playing, in the dead of the night.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Note:**

Okay, this chapter is a bit smaller than I thought. It's also being posted without a safety net. My beta reader went MIA again, and my daughter didn't want the job this time.

I wanted to post this chapter today, since tomorrow I will be mega busy with the 'Twilight Experience', and I will be recovering from it on Wednesday.

So, it was either post without a beta edit, or wait until Thursday. I opted for the former. I apologize if there were any mistakes I missed. In a few days, when my beta comes back online, I'll ask her to proof it, and if there are any mistakes, I'll fix them at that time.

I received a few reviews for chapter three… thank you. I will go ahead and continue posting, as long as there are people interested in me doing so. I am up past seventy-seven thousand words now, and have just started chapter twenty-two. And I'm only on day eight of Bella's stay!

Just FYI, but the more reviews I receive, the faster I post.

Thanks for reading, and MTLBYAKY

**Shameless Plug:**

I have written my first novel! 'The Mengliad' is available on Amazon, in both paperback and Kindle versions, and the sequel, 'The Registry's Secrets', will be available soon!

**Blurb:**

"There are a lot of beliefs out there. Some people think we got here by spacecraft. Some think we evolved, like Humans, but in a slightly different direction. Some think we were created by God, after Adam and Eve were banished from the Garden of Eden. However we came to be, the truth of the matter is, there are two species that are near-identical in every way that inhabit the Earth. One is Human, one is Mengliad."

What would you do if you learned that there was a separate Human-like species on the planet? Jessica Mitchell is about to be faced with that very question. The strange flu bug she seems to have caught quickly becomes the least of her worries. While on her way home from work, she passes out in Central Park, only to regain consciousness hours later, under the gaze of a kind but odd stranger. This Good Samaritan offers his assistance, and subsequently opens the gate to a world she knows nothing about.

Initially, Jessica is reluctant to believe what Craddock Daniels tells her, but after the unsettling reality sinks in, she feels she has no choice but to follow him and his friends. Changes are taking place, and she is now in danger because of them. Will Craddock be able to protect her? Does Jessica possess the strength to endure all that is happening to her? Can love really blossom under the direst of circumstances?

THE MENGLIAD is a romance adventure novel with a sci-fi flavor. At over 112,000 words, this story evokes a sense of how horrible it would be to have everything you knew pulled from under you.


	5. Chapter 5

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Five

By: Jana~

**XXX**

Okay, dark room… someone had turned out the lights. Quiet iPod… someone had turned it off. Dead of night… Wow. The forest outside the clear walls had never looked so creepy.

And I was parched. Well, Esme had said to make myself at home. If I had been at home, I would have snuck downstairs to get a glass of water. So that's what I did.

It was hard to maneuver in the dark, but I didn't want to start hunting for light switches, so I managed best I could. Knowing my luck, I would somehow find a way to walk right out of some opened window wall I hadn't noticed before. But luck seemed to be on my side.

I entered the kitchen cautiously, like I didn't belong there, and then started my search for any kind of bottled water or a glass.

I nearly leapt out of my own skin when, suddenly, the darkness vanished. I spun around, my eyes struggling to adjust to the abruptness of light.

"Looking for something?"

"Edward." I exhaled sharply, almost relieved. "You scared the pants off of me!"

"You're still fully clothed."

I rolled my eyes, then answered his previous question. "I woke up thirsty. I was just looking for a glass of water."

He pointed to a cupboard to the right of the sink. Presumably, he was directing me to where they kept their glasses.

Yep. There they were, all neatly lined up in a row, looking as brand new as the pots, pans, and plates I'd seen them using, and had used myself.

I could feel his eyes on me as I filled a glass up at the tap and drank.

"Have fun with your snooping?" I asked. I fully expected him to deny it, and I had no intention of calling him on it. We both knew he had done it.

"I was curious to see what theories you were investigating."

Okay, that surprised me. He wasn't even bothering to lie about it.

"Well, as I'm sure you were able to deduce, I didn't get very far."

I set my glass in the sink and turned to face him.

"Really?"

He seemed surprised by that. No, not just surprised. Relieved? Confused? Had I missed something? Was the answer there all along and I overlooked it? Dismissed it as not possible? The tabs were still up. I would need to go back and check.

"Well, you saw," I answered. I wasn't about to let him know that he had just slipped up by implying what he had with his inflection.

"I apologize for using your computer without your permission. Curiosity got the better of me."

"I didn't mind that so much," I admitted. "I was more annoyed that you were trying to cheat at our game."

"Game?" He seemed a little irritated. "You think this is a game?"

Wasn't it? Now I was confused. If it wasn't a game, then what was it?

"It seemed like it was," I answered. "You threw down a challenge, I accepted."

"Hmm."

I was really becoming fond of the way he did that. His hum was like music. It made me forget what we were talking about for a moment.

"You should go back to bed now. It's very late. Or early, I guess."

Almost as if in a trance, I nodded, then headed out of the kitchen and for the stairs. He followed.

He followed me all the way to his room, then he stood over me as I climbed back into bed.

"Would you like me to wake you in the morning?"

"I set my alarm," I answered. Okay, that was a stupid answer. If he wanted to wake me, I should let him.

"Dreadful things. Noisy. My way is much less harsh."

He didn't even wait for my response. He plucked my cell phone up from off my laptop, expertly navigated through my settings like he'd owned a phone just like it for years, then disabled the alarm.

"Is seven acceptable? Or do you need more than thirty minutes?"

"Six forty-five?" I asked in return.

He gave a nod, smiled, and then he was right beside me, hovering over me again.

"Sweet dreams, Bella."

There it was again. That reverence in his tone as he said my name. I was growing very fond of that, too.

"Thanks. You, too."

His smile widened, but there was amusement in it again. "Thank you."

I figured he would leave then, but he didn't. He just continued to stand there, watching me. Was I supposed to say something else? What was he waiting for?

I didn't ponder this for long. Two long blinks later and I was out.

"Bella? It's time to wake up."

I slowly opened my eyes, and was greeted by sunlight. And Edward.

He was standing over me, much like he had been in those wee early morning hours. I knew he hadn't been there all night, though. He was in different clothes.

"Hmm, much better than some stupid alarm."

He laughed, and a wide grin exploded across my face. I was more than just fond of his laugh. It seemed to brighten me from the inside out.

"Yes. Like I said." Then he sat on the bed beside me. "Breakfast will be ready soon. Esme hopes you're hungry."

"Your mom spoils me," I said, still grinning. "I think she thinks I'm royalty or something."

"She doesn't often get a chance to cook. She misses it, I think."

"So, you're all on the same liquid diet?" I asked. And this time, he didn't tense or flinch.

"Yes."

"She should get a job at a restaurant. Or is she your homeschool teacher?"

"Yes, Esme is involved in our education."

Two questions in a row, no adverse reaction either time. Okay, a little progress was being made.

"Your meal will be waiting for you when you're ready."

As he stood, gracefully, like there was zero effort in doing so, he brushed his hand down the length of my blanket.

I couldn't help but wonder why. Everything he did seemed to have meaning. Sometimes, it seemed there was more than one.

"When you're ready," he repeated, then he turned and left.

I made quick work of getting ready, but again, I saved brushing my teeth for after I was done with breakfast.

And again, breakfast was no small production. If possible, it was more elaborate than it had been the morning before. Blueberry pancakes with complementing syrup, cubed melon and strawberries, milk and orange juice, toast with butter and jam on the side. How much of this was I expected to eat? Again, I ate a little of everything.

And like yesterday morning, no one was in the room with me. I was fine with that. It was a little weird being watched while I ate. They looked at me with this sort of longing, like they wished they could join me but couldn't.

I brushed my teeth, cleaned up after myself, then ran to the room to put my crap away. My eye caught on my laptop.

What if Edward closed the tabs after he returned home from dropping me off? I wasn't sure if I could pull them all back up from memory, and it would be just my luck if the ones I couldn't remember were the ones with the clues.

My battery wouldn't last until lunch, but as long as it was closed, my teachers would probably be fine with me plugging it in during classes. It was worth a shot.

I slipped it into its bag, slung both it and my backpack onto a shoulder, then bolted for the stairs. I didn't almost die descending, which was a good start to the day.

I grabbed my jacket off the bench on my way out the door. And there was Edward, standing by the car, my door already open.

"You're taking your laptop with you today?"

I slipped into my seat, but waited until he was behind the wheel before answering.

"Yeah. Test day, and a few of the teachers allow you to use notes."

That was a blatant lie, but since he was homeschooled, what did he know of it? Not much, apparently, because he only nodded in response.

"You will find six new tracks on your iPod device. I hope you enjoy them."

"I'm sure I will, if you're the composer and pianist."

His smile grew. Okay, if he was in a good mood, maybe he wouldn't mind a few questions.

"Why were you up so late last night?"

"I couldn't sleep," he answered. He didn't sound angry, but the smile left his face.

"Where have you been sleeping, since I have your room?"

"The couch."

A twinge of guilt hit me. "I really wish you would just let me sleep on the couch. I hate that I've uprooted you."

"It's fine, Bella, I promise."

It didn't seem fine. He was losing sleep because of me.

"Maybe we could switch off? Like, the first week, I'm in the room, the second week, you are."

"No. I'm fine on the couch."

There was a finality to the way he had said that, so I changed the subject.

"If we're not playing a game, why did you challenge me?"

"I wasn't trying to extend a challenge, Bella. I apologize if I gave you that impression."

Okay, that was a lie. He had absolutely challenged me, and what's more, he _knew_ that was what he was doing. I wasn't about to fight with him about it, though. That wouldn't get me anywhere.

"Apology accepted."

His eyebrow quirked. "You're not going to let this go, are you?"

"Not so much," I answered.

I really expected him to be annoyed by that, but he didn't seem to be. He almost seemed… pleased. Maybe he wanted me to figure out his secrets. Maybe, if I put the time and effort into doing so, it would indicate to him that I liked him. And I did. I liked him. I was confused by him, but that was okay. I liked a challenge.

It seemed to take less time to get to school than it did yesterday. He was already pulling into the lot. And, oh joy. Jessica was waiting for me, in the same spot I had left her in last afternoon. I almost laughed at the idea that she had been standing there all night long. She was going to be especially annoying today, I just knew it.

"Tell her our skin falls off in chunks. That should keep her pondering for a while."

Then I did laugh. He might not know Jessica personally, but he obviously knew her type.

"I might just do that. Thanks for the idea."

"You're welcome. Three o'clock again?"

"Yeah, thanks." We pulled up to the curb, but I ignored Jessica as I stepped out of the car.

"Have a wonderful day, Bella."

He said that loudly, like he wanted my annoying somewhat friend to hear. I grinned.

"Thank you, Edward."

And then I shut the door and turned to face my nightmare head on. I heard the car leaving, but he was driving much slower than he ever had before.

"Okay, girl, I need some answers! No _way_ are you getting out of it this time!"

"I would give you some if I had any," I told her. "What do you expect me to say?"

"You have an obligation!"

Oh, I did? I must have missed that memo. "An obligation? In what way am I obligated?"

"No one has ever been on the inside! You have the inside scoop! You have an obligation to spill!"

I glanced over, and saw that the silver Volvo had yet to leave the parking lot. What was he waiting for? Was he expecting me to run after him and beg for his assistance in escaping? An intriguing thought, but one I couldn't act upon, unfortunately.

"There's seriously nothing to spill, Jess. I can't help it if you refuse to believe that."

This did not deter Jessica, which was so unsurprising it was almost laughable.

"What's their house like? Is it really up that private road?"

"Yes, and it's a very nice house."

The Volvo was finally out of the lot, but instead of turning right and leaving, he had turned left and was now inching down the street in front of the school.

Jessica obviously assumed by my answer that I would share further with her, if the questions pertained to the Cullen's house.

"How big is it? Are they as rich as people say they are?"

"It's a three-story home, and I didn't ask to see their financial statements, so I have no idea how rich or not they are."

The Volvo was now back inside the parking lot, heading right for us. What the hell was he doing?

I ignored Jessica and gave him my full attention. He pulled back up in front of me, dropped the window, then leaned across the seat.

"You forgot your iPod," he said.

Oh. I thought it was in my jacket pocket. I checked, and sure enough, it wasn't there. Then he extended it towards me. I reached in through the window to grab it, but as soon as my hand wrapped around it, Jessica nudged her way in.

"Hi… Edward, right? I'm Jessica!"

I shot him an apologetic look, but his eyes were soft and understanding. Then they changed as he focused on Jessica. They almost seemed to darken.

"Hello, Jessica." This was said like a dismissal. Then he looked back to me. His eyes softened again. "I'll be back this afternoon to pick you up, Bella."

I loved how my name sounded, coming from him. I never much cared for it before, but I was starting to like it now.

"Thanks."

Then he rolled up the window and sped off.

"Huh!" Jessica huffed. "He seems cold. I wouldn't get my hopes up, if I were you."

How many days of detention would I get if I smacked her? Too many, I decided. She was so oblivious. He wasn't cold to me at all. He was just cold to _her_. If I didn't have to see her five days a week, nine months out of the year, I would be cold to her, too.

I shrugged in response, then started for my first period class. And, as per usual, she followed.

"What are the other Cullen kids like? Are they as rude as _he_ is?"

Ugh! Detention sucks. Detention sucks. Detention sucks.

"He wasn't being rude, and the rest of the family is very nice."

"You're impossible! You're not even trying!"

Unlike you, who is trying on every level. "I can't give you something I don't have. Let it go. You're barking up the wrong tree." Fitting, since she was acting like a pit bull at the moment.

"This isn't over!"

Oh, yay.

"I'll see you at lunch!"

Yeah, no you won't. I didn't care if it was pouring buckets. I would rather get drenched and catch pneumonia than spend a second more dodging her ridiculous questions.

"Four minutes till the tardy bell," I informed her, then I picked up my pace and left her behind me.

As I figured they would be, my teachers were fine with me plugging in my laptop during class… as long as I didn't open it up. At lunch time, the battery would still be fully charged, and I could spend the whole of the thirty-three minutes I had pouring over the info I had located last night.

There was a clue hidden in one of those internet windows, I was sure of it.

I knew Jessica would try to ambush me. She knew where my class was, and the usual route I took to get the cafeteria. So I asked the teacher if I could leave three minutes before the bell, claiming I had to use the restroom. I knew she would say yes. I never asked to go during class if I really didn't have to go, unlike a lot of other students, who used the free pass to skip out or goof around for a few minutes.

I had a head start. I would be well on my way to the forest's edge by the time the bell even rang.

I could hear the dismissal bell as I made my way up the knoll, and grinned to myself as I imagined Jessica's face. She would probably spend the entire lunch period trying to track me down, missing out on eating anything because of it. Served her right. The Cullens hadn't done anything to her. She shouldn't be trying to get dish on them.

I found my faithful tree friend and plopped down near it, eager to get started. I pulled the laptop from its bag and got it running, then maneuvered the mouse down to the task bar.

Wait. Where were my tabs? They were there last night, when I closed it up after realizing Edward had been messing with it!

Oh! That sneaky little game player! That's what he had been waiting for, after I got back into bed with a tummy full of water. He was waiting for me to fall asleep! Okay, Mr. We're Not Playing A Game! I can be sneaky, too!

I went to the internet history to relocate my tabs, a determined scowl on my face.

Click, click, click, and…

Oh, crap! He was one step ahead of me! He cleared my history!

"Son of a bitch!"

Okay, I did _not_ just imagine that! There was a definite snigger.

I jumped up and looked around, but there was nobody there. I went a little deeper and peeked around a few trees, but still, no one.

Gathering my bravery, I called out, "Who's there?" Silence. "I heard you! You're a lousy stalker, whoever you are!" Again, silence.

Then my stomach sank. I was definitely being watched, but it didn't feel like it had yesterday. It didn't feel comforting. It felt… menacing.

Just then, my cell phone started to go off. Jessica. But it wasn't a text message, it was a live call. I was being offered a lifeline, so I took it.

"Hey, Jess," I said into the phone. I sounded scared, but of course she didn't pick up on that.

"Where are you?" Her shrieking hurt my ear, so I moved the phone away for a second before bringing it back.

"Sorry, I'm on my way."

And I was. I made it back to the tree, gathered up my crap, then moved quickly towards the school.

"Just, stay on the line with me, okay? Where are you at? The cafeteria?"

"Naturally! Where are you?"

"On my way," I repeated.

Jessica's annoying questions were better than death. I would have to seriously consider whether or not I was going to go back to the forest alone. I had never been worried about it before – Forks was a pretty safe place – but there was something very wrong going on now.

"How do you think you did on your math test?" It was a lame question, considering, but I wanted to keep her on the line until I was closer to the school.

"I don't care about some stupid math test, Bella! You're testing our friendship, you know!"

I rolled my eyes. "Sorry. Look, I'm almost there now, okay? We'll talk in a few."

I didn't wait for her response before hanging up. I was a good enough distance away from the forest to feel normal again, and the adrenalin started easing even more the further away from it I got.

I spotted her at our usual table when I walked through the doors. Yeah, she was pissed. I pulled up my best remorseful expression and sat down beside her.

"Sorry, I was having a bathroom issue."

Her anger seemed to fade a little. "I thought you were avoiding me!"

"Why would I do that?" It wasn't a lie, it was a question.

"You tell me!"

"There's nothing to tell."

"Fine," she huffed. Then she paused for a few seconds before starting in. "Why did your parents send you over there?"

Okay, this question was about me. I could handle that. "I'm not sure."

"Are your parents friends with them?"

"Well, my dad kinda is, I guess, with Dr. Cullen. They don't hang out or anything, though."

"If they don't have a skin condition, why don't they attend school?"

Ugh! Bitch needs to give it a rest!

Um, okay, the adrenalin come down was making me irritable.

"I don't know if they have a skin condition. I told you that."

"There's seven of them, right? Five kids? All adopted?"

Oh my God, this was going to be the longest twenty-two minutes of my life!

"I believe they're adopted, but I don't know for sure. I didn't ask," I added firmly.

She ignored my tone and continued.

"Where do you sleep? A guestroom?"

Okay, this seemed a benign enough question, but the answer would likely send Jessica fleeing to the PA system.

"One of them gave up their room for me."

She seemed positively giddy now. "Oooh! Which one? Edward?"

Shit, crap, hell!

"Does it really matter?"

"Of course it matters!"

Okay, I was not going to do this. As much as I hate lying, I was going to have to. "Her name is Alice."

Jessica seemed to deflate a little. "What kind of furnishings do they have?"

"Typical stuff. Couch, TV, dining table—"

"No, no!" she interrupted. "What _kind_? Like, are they expensive?"

Oh. She was fishing around the 'are they rich' question again. "I have no idea how much they paid for their home furnishings, Jess."

"You can tell if something cost a lot of money just by looking at it!"

Maybe, or maybe one shouldn't care because it doesn't really matter. "I can't."

This went on until the bell rang. Even beyond that, because she followed me halfway to my next class. She was in Gym with me later, but currently, the coach had us split into teams for basketball, and she wasn't on mine. I could avoid her during class, but after, I would have to make a beeline for my last period of the day. Maybe I could fake a minor injury and get sent to the nurse's office.

That turned out to be a good idea. Twelve minutes into class, I allowed the basketball to hit me in the head. It hurt a little, but not to the extent I made it out to be. The coach excused me, no problem.

I changed out of my gym clothes, grabbed my stuff, then headed for the office. The nurse – since she knew me so well – didn't even question me. She didn't even send me off to English after Gym. She just gave me an icepack, sat me in a chair, and then two minutes before the final bell rang, she said I could leave.

I walked slowly out of the office, but as soon as I was outside, I nearly ran to the parking lot.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

Okay, the last chapter got beta-ed, so I made those corrections and replaced the file. This chapter was beta-ed before posting, so all should read well.

I can see that people are clicking on the story, but the reviews have been sparse. Not sure if this is because the fic sucks, or if people just don't feel like reviewing. If it sucks, someone needs to tell me so I can stop bothering to post it. I've put writing the sequel to my novel on hold for this, so if I shouldn't be bothering with this, I'd rather just stop now and move on.

To those who have reviewed… thanks!

MTLBYAKY

**Shameless Plug:**

I have written my first novel! 'The Mengliad' is available on Amazon, in both paperback and Kindle versions, and the sequel, 'The Registry's Secrets', will be available soon!

**Blurb:**

"There are a lot of beliefs out there. Some people think we got here by spacecraft. Some think we evolved, like Humans, but in a slightly different direction. Some think we were created by God, after Adam and Eve were banished from the Garden of Eden. However we came to be, the truth of the matter is, there are two species that are near-identical in every way that inhabit the Earth. One is Human, one is Mengliad."

What would you do if you learned that there was a separate Human-like species on the planet? Jessica Mitchell is about to be faced with that very question. The strange flu bug she seems to have caught quickly becomes the least of her worries. While on her way home from work, she passes out in Central Park, only to regain consciousness hours later, under the gaze of a kind but odd stranger. This Good Samaritan offers his assistance, and subsequently opens the gate to a world she knows nothing about.

Initially, Jessica is reluctant to believe what Craddock Daniels tells her, but after the unsettling reality sinks in, she feels she has no choice but to follow him and his friends. Changes are taking place, and she is now in danger because of them. Will Craddock be able to protect her? Does Jessica possess the strength to endure all that is happening to her? Can love really blossom under the direst of circumstances?

THE MENGLIAD is a romance adventure novel with a sci-fi flavor. At over 112,000 words, this story evokes a sense of how horrible it would be to have everything you knew pulled from under you.


	6. Chapter 6

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Six

By: Jana~

**XXX**

There he was, waiting for me, leaning against his car and looking pensive.

I was so excited to see him, a smile pulled at my mouth subconsciously. But then I remembered what he had done. My smile turned to a scowl as I approached.

He held my door open for me, then made his way to his side of the car, slower than I knew he was capable of.

We had just left the parking lot when he spoke.

"Are you very angry with me?"

"Yes! Do you even know why I am?"

"Yes. I'm sorry."

"I don't think you are!" I shot at him. "Cheating is against the rules!"

"I wasn't cheating."

I scoffed. "You deleted my internet history! That's cheating!"

"I'm sorry. I was afraid."

That dissipated my angry mood. What was he afraid of? "Afraid?"

"Initially, I was intrigued by the notion that you might actually… figure me out. But then I realized… that would not be a good thing, Bella."

There was no reverent lilt to his tone when he said my name that time. It saddened me a little, but more than that, I was sad for him. He seemed truly frightened. What secret could he possibly have, that would freak him out this badly?

"Why?"

"You shouldn't know too much about me. It's safer if you don't."

"Safer for who?"

He didn't answer. He just tightened his grip on the steering wheel.

"Earlier, when you were dropping me off, you seemed happy about the idea that I was trying to figure you out."

"I was being foolish. If I sincerely asked you to let it go, would you?"

"No," I answered honestly. He sighed. Heavily. "This really has you freaked out, doesn't it?"

Again, he didn't answer. Then he asked another question of his own. "Have you heard from your mother?"

I blinked. Total subject change. "Not yet, but she's always been a bit flighty. She'll get around to it."

"Alice is looking forward to playing with you."

"So, that's it? You're just going to drop it? You're just expecting me to?"

"I really wish that you would. I can't bear the thought of any harm coming to you."

Whoa. Okay, I wasn't expecting that. My first inclination was that he would somehow get in trouble, if I pressed on and learned his secret. But now he was suggesting that it would be _me_ who was in some kind of danger.

"How might I be harmed?"

He took forever to speak again, but it wasn't in answer to my question. "Esme hopes you're hungry."

"Stop that!" I snapped. I was getting seriously irritated. "Answer my question!"

"I can't."

"Can't or won't?"

"Can't. Is there someone else you can stay with?"

Anger mixed with fear. "You're kicking me out?"

"Of course not. I was wondering if you have another option."

"I like where I'm at."

"Then of course you're welcome to stay."

My head was spinning. This went beyond some weird skin condition, or an odd reclusive family. Something was really, really wrong. Had he been kidnapped by the Cullens, maybe, and not actually adopted? Had the doctor and Esme figured out our game and threatened him somehow?

But, no, he said _I_ would be in danger. This wasn't making any sense! Besides, the doctor and Esme didn't seem the type to kidnap or threaten. Or harm. Dr. Cullen was the nicest doctor they had down there at the hospital.

"I want to ask you a question, and if you don't feel like you can answer it, I want you to blink twice."

Suddenly, for just a moment, I felt like I was in a bad after school special or TV movie of the week.

He arched his eyebrow in response, clearly curious.

"Were you actually adopted, or were you a victim of kidnapping?"

Um, okay, this was getting bizarre! He actually started busting up laughing!

"No, Bella, I was actually adopted."

"What happened to your parents?"

"They died of… an illness."

He hesitated. I was becoming hypersensitive of every little thing he said now. And he definitely hesitated. Something about the word 'illness' was hard for him to say.

"What kind of illness?"

"The terminal kind."

He was avoiding. "Does this illness have a name?"

"Yes."

Ugh! Frustrating man! "And it's called?"

"It doesn't matter."

"I think it does," I said. "I have a theory. Want to hear it?"

He stiffened. "Yes."

Okay, so, the line here hadn't been totally severed.

"You speak very fluently… unless you're trying to hide something. You hesitated on the word _illness_. I think that means that it very much matters."

"You are a very perceptive individual."

"So I've been told. Am I right?"

"Yes."

"Edward? Did someone kill your parents?"

"No. They died of an illness. I'm just not comfortable telling you which one."

We were on the private road that led to his house now. I would only be able to squeeze in a few more questions before we got there.

And then I asked the very question I had mentally berated Jessica for asking me. "Do you have a skin condition like the rumors say?"

He didn't like that question. He tensed further and his face hardened.

But he answered it anyway. "It's not a condition, exactly."

"Then what exactly is it?"

He didn't answer that question. We were almost there.

"I just have one more thing to say, before we get to your house. Then I'll drop this… for now."

He nodded.

"I can tell you're scared, but I think a part of you hopes I _will_ figure this out. Am I wrong?"

We were seconds away from the front of the house. I could see that out of my peripheral vision, but my eyes stayed on Edward.

Then, with a motion I almost couldn't detect, he shook his head. That was enough for me. I _would_ figure out Edward Cullen's secret.

The atmosphere in the house was strained. Sure, it could have just been my imagination, but it seemed as if they all somehow knew what was going on between me and Edward. The now very serious game we were playing.

Only Esme and Alice remained chipper, though you could just tell they were stressed about something.

After dinner – another amazing meal – Alice begged me to play with her.

I don't know what I expected, but her version of 'play' wasn't exactly what one thinks of when they hear the word. She kept asking me to try on different outfits, and then she wanted to do my hair and makeup when she finally decided she liked one. And during all of it, she asked me questions about myself.

What did my friends and I do for fun? Had I ever had a boyfriend? Did I have a favorite movie, book, or musician? That was how the subject of Edward came up. I mentioned that I loved the compositions he had put on my iPod.

"He's a brilliant pianist," she said.

I agreed, then I tried to keep the conversation on him.

"He seems very mature, for someone his age." Not just mature, but formal. Almost prim and proper. I didn't say that out loud, though.

"I suppose he is."

She had already applied my makeup, and had moved on to 'playing' with my hair.

"He also seems a little bit tortured." Like, down to the depths of his soul.

She laughed, which seemed a little odd considering what I had said, but I was grateful that she did. She didn't seem as hard to talk to. Maybe I could get answers from _her_.

"Yes, well, that's Edward. We're always telling him to lighten up!"

"Any clue why he's like that?"

She paused for a moment – she did that ear perking thing like Edward had done – and then she rolled her eyes. "He's not happy about the direction of this conversation."

How could she _possibly_ know that? How could he even know what kind of conversation we were having? He wasn't even here. But then I briefly considered that, maybe, he had slipped in when I was distracted. I glanced around the room, but Alice brought my head back to where it had been before.

"Don't worry. He's not here."

"Then, how do you know—?"

She laughed, cutting off my question, and then she changed the subject. Slightly.

"You've been busy on the internet."

Okay, so, his family _did_ know about our little game.

"I didn't get far," I told her. As long as she was speaking in vague terms, so would I.

"You got farther than you think you did. You just didn't realize you had."

She was dropping hints! She wanted me to figure this out, too!

"I was going to follow up on that, but someone deleted my internet history."

She laughed at that. Hard.

"I don't suppose—?"

"Sorry. Edward would rip my head off. This is something you're going to have to figure out on your own. It's more fun that way, right?"

I couldn't agree with that. I was about to go nuts!

"You can't even give me a hint?"

She laughed again, but it didn't seem to be in response to me, or what I had said.

"Man, is his tail in a knot! Sorry, I don't wish to die."

I was so close! Alice seemed excited for me to know! And it wasn't like the slight interest Edward had shown, then snatched away. This was outright enthusiasm.

But the weird thing was, she was acting as if she knew his current state of mind, when he wasn't even in the room. Like Edward had before, on the way home, when he spoke about Esme.

"You look amazing!"

She was finally done, and was standing there admiring her handiwork.

"I love playing with you! We should do it one more time, before you have to leave!"

I guessed I could handle that. Alice was fun to be around, anyway.

She took my hands in her gloved ones, pulled me to my feet, then nearly dragged me over to the full-length mirror in the corner of her room.

Okay, wow. I mean, I looked weird – not like me at all – but I also looked… good. She was good at makeovers, that was for sure.

"You like it." She said this very matter-of-factly. "You should go downstairs, so Edward can see it firsthand."

Firsthand? As opposed to…?

"Oh, and Bella?" She turned me to face her. "Don't give up, okay? Some things are worth the extra effort."

She glanced at the door, rolled her eyes, then took my hand and started skipping out into the hallway. We descended the stairs, her like a bouncing fairy, me with two clumsy left feet, until we were on the landing and heading towards the living room.

Oh, God, she was going to 'show me off'!

Edward was already standing, like he was expecting us. Everyone else stood as soon as we entered. Well, except for Rosalie. She just semi-glared in my direction and then looked back at the TV.

Edward was the first to speak. "You look lovely, not that you needed Alice's interventions."

Whoa! Okay, I was burning hot with embarrassment, so maybe I misunderstood his words, but that sounded like a compliment!

Alice scoffed. "Beauty can always be enhanced!"

Then Esme spoke. "You look beautiful, Bella. That shade of blue is very stunning on you."

I looked down at my clothes, and noticed for the first time that I was, indeed, wearing blue. "What shade is this?" I asked.

"Colonial!" Alice chirped.

Wait a second! Back the truck up! Didn't Edward say his favorite color was Colonial blue? Was Alice trying to play matchmaker?

"Hot," Emmett said, nodding appreciatively. Rosalie glared at him, but then so did Edward, just not as hard.

"Very nice. Sincerely." Jasper was actually smiling. It seemed a little pained, but still. Maybe he wasn't exactly afraid of me after all.

"Perfection on top of perfection," Dr. Cullen said. He was absolutely beaming at me.

Emmett cleared his throat, and Rosalie glared at him again. But then, she turned her head just a little and called out over her shoulder, "I like your hair."

I guessed that was the best I was going to get from her. If I didn't think she disliked me before, I did now.

"We should take a picture!" Alice chirped. "Jasper, it's in her suitcase. Please?"

I didn't stop to think too hard about how she knew that.

"Edward, you should be in it, too!"

He glared at Alice for her suggestion. And then Jasper was back, with my camera.

I had seen a hint of it with Alice, and I had already figured out that Edward was inhumanly fast, but Jasper, too?

"Oh, come on!" Alice said to Edward, pleading. "It won't kill you to smile!"

Reluctantly, or so it seemed, Edward walked over and stood beside me. Then Alice raised the camera, but after a moment, she lowered it again.

"The saying is 'say cheese'! Not 'suck on a lemon'!"

Everyone laughed… except Rosalie and Edward.

"I can stand here forever, Edward."

He moved a little closer to me then, but I wasn't brave enough to look up at him. But I guessed he was smiling, because Alice then raised the camera again and clicked off a picture.

She danced over to show it to me. As she did, Edward stepped away.

I didn't care about me at all. I'd seen what I looked like in the mirror, and, yeah, I looked good, but what I was more interested in, was Edward.

He _was_ smiling. It wasn't a big smile, but still, it was there.

"I'm done torturing you now," Alice said to me. "You should go do some internet browsing."

I think my ears must have been playing tricks on me, because I could have sworn I heard a low growl. It sounded a little like how a lion might growl when being threatened.

And then I noticed that everyone was staring at me expectantly. Again, Edward and Rosalie were the exception.

This was just too weird. Then it got weirder.

"Sure, he's an amazing pianist, and yeah, he's highly intelligent, but so are a lot of people."

I stared back at Alice, stupidly, though I understood exactly what she was doing. She was subtly narrowing my search options.

Obviously, it wasn't subtle enough. This time, I _know_ I heard a growl, and I also knew where it came from. Edward.

I nodded, bobble-head stupid, and headed for the stairs. Before I made it very far, I heard the faint whisperings of the conversation taking place in the room I had just left.

"She's _going_ to figure it out, Edward. Why not help her along a little? I'm not breaking any rules. I didn't tell her what words to use, I just told her which words _not_ to use."

There was a whispered reply, but I couldn't make any of it out. I wasn't even sure who was talking, though I suspected it was Edward.

I felt strange as I entered his room. He seemed so conflicted. A part of him wanted me to figure this out, but another part of him didn't. What would happen if I did? Which part of him would rule then?

I grabbed my laptop, opened and turned it on, then I gave thought to the search words I had used before. Minus 'intelligent' and 'pianist'.

Speed. That one was obvious. Liquid diet. Pale skin. Cold hands. Unusual eye color. Good a place as any to start. If I remembered more, I would add them.

Again, a bunch of superhero and vampire crap came up.

Radioactive spiders? Kryptonite? Vigilante millionaires? Okay, sure, the Cullens weren't hurting financially, but millionaires? And the vampire stuff didn't seem any better. They didn't live in a castle, with coffins in a dungeon. They didn't seem to have any kind of aversion to garlic. They cooked with it! And Edward and Dr. Cullen, at least, had been out in the daytime a bunch of times. Weren't vampires supposed to burst into flames as soon as the sun rose in the sky?

And, realistically – okay, it was weird to think of it that way, but pretending for a second that vampires were actually real – wouldn't they have… eaten me… already?

This was maddening beyond all reason! Even with hints, I was no closer to figuring this out. I slammed my laptop closed with an aggravated sigh.

"Still unable to find the answer?"

I glanced in his direction, but then I just dropped back on the bed. "No," I told the ceiling. "I wish you would just tell me." I almost sounded like I was pleading. If I were being honest, I was.

"I can't."

"It's not your family you're worried about, is it? It's someone else."

"Yes."

"It's the _other_ people that might harm me if I know, right?"

"Yes."

"Will they if I figure it out on my own?"

"I don't know."

"Your family doesn't seem too worried about that," I mentioned.

"I know."

"But you don't agree with them," I assumed.

"I don't know how to feel about it. There's a risk involved, and I don't like putting you at risk. I feel very… protective of you."

I pushed myself up onto my elbows and locked eyes with him. He seemed absolutely anguished. God, what was going on inside his head?

"If I started taking guesses, would you tell me if I'm right?"

"Yes." His head moved almost imperceptibly towards the door, again, like he was listening for something.

Super human hearing, maybe?

"From another planet?"

"No."

"Bit by some kind of radioactive insect?"

"No."

"Some kind of rich vigilante?"

"No."

I dropped myself back onto the bed again. "Ugh! I give up!"

"Maybe that's for the best."

"Do you want me to give up?" Again, I directed my question to the ceiling.

"I'm… conflicted."

"You hesitated again," I informed him.

"I guess I did."

"You're not exactly conflicted. You're scared."

"Yes."

"Of what?"

"I don't want to lose you, now that I have finally found you."

Finally found me? Had I been lost? I propped myself up again so that I could look at him, and I almost gasped. His expression held… well, fear, but also… love?

Oh, God, was that what he was feeling? I had been hoping for 'like' – just a fraction of what I was feeling – but… could it be that he was as drawn to me as I was to him? I felt drunk again.

"Tell me what you're thinking."

"When you say 'lose me'… are you afraid I'm going to leave, once I figure this out?"

"Yes."

"Why would I? There's nothing that could be that bad."

"You say that now, wrapped in your ignorant bliss. You might feel differently once you know."

I wanted to go to him. I wanted to wrap my arms around him and comfort him. Try to reassure him. But something told me not to. That it was a bad idea.

"You don't know me as well as you think you do," I told him.

"I would like to change that."

My heart was set on self-destruct, I was sure of it. "I would, too, but I don't think I'll ever figure this out. And until I do… Well, it's kind of necessary, isn't it?"

I knew he would know what I meant. If I wasn't in the know, then no relationship.

"Yes."

Yeah, that's what I figured. Okay, I needed to clear my head. I needed to start fresh. And I needed to get my heart rate down before I exploded all over his room.

"Do you think Alice would mind if I washed up now? I know she went to a lot of trouble—"

"No. She doesn't mind."

Again with the present tense. She wasn't anywhere in the room! How could he know that?

I pushed the thought aside as I stood. But instead of grabbing my stuff, I just stared back at him.

"Is there a time limit?"

He seemed confused. What had I said? It sounded coherent inside my head, but with the way I was feeling, it could very well have been gibberish that came out of my mouth.

"For the shower?" he asked.

Oh. No, he understood the question, just not the context.

"No. For me figuring this out."

"No. I'll wait forever, if need be."

A new surge of adrenalin hit my heart. I needed space. I didn't _want_ space – I wanted to get lost in his eyes – but I _needed_ it. I had a job to do. I needed to be able to concentrate, and with what he was doing to me, just by being in my presence… well, it wasn't conducive to concentration.

Forcing myself to break away, finally, I grabbed my stuff and headed for the door. I would have to pass him on my way out. Close proximity to him was bad, in a good way.

He flattened himself against the door to let me through; I felt his eyes on me as I walked to and entered the bathroom.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

Okay, the reviews have been a little more encouraging. Thanks to those who took the time.

I'm at over eighty-seven thousand words now – well into chapter twenty-four – so I have lots to share. And I just started on day nine! Still have five more days to go within the timeline of the **two weeks**. (smile)

I want to extend a special thanks to my beta-reader! Even as she writes her own fic, she finds the time to help me out! Luv 'ya!

Review, please! They make my world go round!

MTLBYAKY

**Shameless Plug:**

I have written my first novel! 'The Mengliad' is available on Amazon, in both paperback and Kindle versions, and the sequel, 'The Registry's Secrets', will be available soon!

**Blurb:**

"There are a lot of beliefs out there. Some people think we got here by spacecraft. Some think we evolved, like Humans, but in a slightly different direction. Some think we were created by God, after Adam and Eve were banished from the Garden of Eden. However we came to be, the truth of the matter is, there are two species that are near-identical in every way that inhabit the Earth. One is Human, one is Mengliad."

What would you do if you learned that there was a separate Human-like species on the planet? Jessica Mitchell is about to be faced with that very question. The strange flu bug she seems to have caught quickly becomes the least of her worries. While on her way home from work, she passes out in Central Park, only to regain consciousness hours later, under the gaze of a kind but odd stranger. This Good Samaritan offers his assistance, and subsequently opens the gate to a world she knows nothing about.

Initially, Jessica is reluctant to believe what Craddock Daniels tells her, but after the unsettling reality sinks in, she feels she has no choice but to follow him and his friends. Changes are taking place, and she is now in danger because of them. Will Craddock be able to protect her? Does Jessica possess the strength to endure all that is happening to her? Can love really blossom under the direst of circumstances?

THE MENGLIAD is a romance adventure novel with a sci-fi flavor. At over 112,000 words, this story evokes a sense of how horrible it would be to have everything you knew pulled from under you.


	7. Chapter 7

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Seven

By: Jana~

**XXX**

I turned the water on, adjusted the temperature, stripped, and then got in. But I was completely distracted as I washed myself. I couldn't bring myself to care, though. I would take a more thorough shower tomorrow.

The last forty-eight hours had been the absolute weirdest of my life. I knew they would be, but I had imagined them being so in an entirely different way.

Edward aside for a moment…

Alice treated me like we were best friends, or sisters, even though we barely knew each other. And because of that I felt strangely close to her, too. It was like she was privy to information or memories about our lives that I wasn't.

Esme and Dr. Cullen looked at me like I was their daughter. Like Alice, it was as if they knew something I didn't. Like how family and friends act around a loved one with amnesia, anxiously waiting for their memories to click back into place.

Rosalie hated me for no reason.

Emmett and Jasper seemed to like me, though their feelings seemed to be a bit weaker than the others. But again, it was like I was the only one not in the know.

And then there was Edward. I was never one to believe in love at first sight – I usually scoffed when that was the plot of a book or movie – but that seemed to be what was happening between us now. At first, I thought it was just me. I felt drawn to him in a way that didn't even make sense. The idea that he could possibly feel the same way… Well, it seemed surreal, to put it simply.

I honestly didn't know what the future held, if it held anything at all pertaining to Edward, but to snip the thread that was tied to that possibility… It was a little bit frightening. It was like I was standing on a precipice, with two options before me: to jump or not to jump. On one hand, I could take the plunge and be with Edward. That option would be wrought with danger and difficulties. On the other hand, I could turn around. It would be safe, yes, but I'd never have the thrill of knowing what it was like to have Edward in my life the way I wanted.

I was invested now, strange as that seemed. He was under my skin, in my every waking thought. At the end of two weeks, could I honestly just walk away and pretend none of this had happened? Would I be expected to? Okay, yeah, he said he would wait forever, but since forever wasn't a realistic consideration, what were we left with? Until the end of my stay? A few months? Years, maybe? Then what?

If I couldn't figure this out, would we at least remain friends? Could we be that without wanting more?

The only logical course of action was to figure this _thing_ out. Once I was in the know, things would be much clearer. Simpler.

The water was starting to run cold. Okay, for how long was I standing there thinking?

Finally snapping out of my introspective state of semi-consciousness, I got ready for bed as quick as I could and went back to the room. He was still in there, on his bed, on my computer.

I knew he knew I was there, but he didn't look up or acknowledge me.

"Don't you own a computer?" I asked. A slight smile inched onto his face.

"I do," he answered.

"But mine is much more fascinating?"

"At the moment, yes."

"Am I anywhere close to on the right track?"

He finally looked up at me. "That might be giving you too much information."

"You're really going to make me work for this, aren't you?"

His smile grew, then dropped. "May I ask you a hypothetical question?"

He could ask me anything he wanted, as long as he kept talking. "Sure." I joined him on the bed, on the other side of my laptop so that it was between us.

"What if the world wasn't as black and white as you thought it was?"

"I'm open to the possibilities. Aliens, the supernatural…"

His eyes brightened a little.

The supernatural? He already said he wasn't from another planet. I wasn't opposed to any consideration anymore. A logical answer just didn't seem to fit.

Okay, so, what did the supernatural entail? Ghosts? Heavenly beings? Anything outside explanation, really.

"What are you thinking?"

"I'm running a list of supernatural options inside my head," I answered.

"Have you found anything interesting, within your list?"

I shrugged. "It covers a lot of ground, but off the top of my head… Angels?"

He seemed frustrated by that. He scowled a little, then looked away. "You think too much of me."

I scowled, too. "I don't think I do."

"Angels are inherently _good_."

"And you're not?"

His eyes found mine again, and while he didn't answer verbally, I knew what he was trying to convey.

"You're not _bad_, Edward. You couldn't be."

I knew he wasn't, but since he seemed to think so… Okay, _bad_ supernatural. What was in that category? I'd never really given much thought to such things before. I would need to do another search.

I reached for my laptop to turn it towards me, set to do just that, but he pulled it away. Inched it, really, just a little. It was a subtle request.

"You'd rather me wait until I'm alone?"

He gave a slight nod, then stared back at me expectantly.

I wasn't ready for our time to be up yet. Every moment seemed precious. Like each second might very well be the last. "It can wait till later." I dropped back onto the bed, my legs dangling off the end, and stared up at the ceiling.

I was vaguely aware that he had closed my laptop and set it on the floor, but then, surprisingly – more than just surprising – he joined me. Like magnets, the kind that both attract and repel, we turned towards each other, but kept a measured distance between us. And then we just stared at each other for what seemed like hours.

My blinks were getting longer, but I fought against them. Each time my eyes would close, I forced them back open. I wasn't ready to lose this strange but wonderful connection to him yet.

He seemed as wide awake as ever. He rarely blinked, and sometimes, it seemed he wasn't even breathing. But every time I tried to concentrate on that, I would hear him inhale or exhale. I chalked it up to my imagination playing tricks on me.

And then I lost the fight. I was only just barely aware of something cool – cold, really – touching my forehead, and then I felt myself being moved. I couldn't wrap my brain around it, though, so I didn't try to. I just snuggled into the bed and allowed sleep to whisk me away to the land of dreams.

The next morning – almost afternoon – when I finally woke up, my first inclination was to grab my laptop and start my search over, to include _bad supernatural_. But the smells coming from downstairs were just too tempting.

I didn't even bother to change out of my nightclothes. Saturdays were the best day of the week. No school, and still one more day of freedom on the horizon. With Sundays, you just knew Monday was right around the corner – the worst day of the week.

I padded down the stairs, trying to tame my hair as I went, and straight into the kitchen. Half the family was there. Edward, Alice, and Esme. I immediately felt as if I was interrupting.

"Good morning!" Alice chirped.

I glanced at the clock on the wall. "For another forty-three minutes."

"Edward didn't have the heart to wake you. He said you needed your rest."

I looked to him, but he was avoiding eye contact. Had something happened? We couldn't _stop_ looking at each other last night.

"I hope you're hungry," Esme said.

I almost laughed. She hoped for that a lot.

"In a few minutes I will be," I said, smiling back at her. "My stomach is still waking up."

"Here! Start with this!" Alice then proceeded to hand me a glass of orange juice, which was already poured and seated in its usual spot on the island counter.

I took a few sips, then held it in front of me with two hands as I stared at the floor. The vibe Edward was giving off was distant again. His mood swings were starting to give me whiplash.

"Not right now."

Huh? Was he talking to me? Had I missed something?

"Always so serious," Alice said, in a mock-scolding. "She has a few minutes until her breakfast is ready!"

She plucked the orange juice from my hand, set it back on the counter, and took my arm, leading me from the room. Edward followed.

We entered a room I had only seen once before. The main piece of furniture in it was a piano. I assumed it was Edward's, since he was the pianist. We approached it, then she took me by the waist and directed me onto the bench.

Was she expecting me to play? I didn't know how to play the piano, and even if I did, I certainly wouldn't play in front of Edward. He would laugh at me for sure.

But then Edward joined me on the bench seat, at Alice's physical urging.

Oh! _He_ was going to play for _me_! Okay, yeah. That idea appealed to me.

I was very aware of our close proximity – a little nervous by it, really – but then he started playing, and it just didn't matter anymore. It was a song I hadn't heard yet, but it was just as amazing as all the others I had.

I closed my eyes, anchoring myself to the seat by gripping the edge of it, and let the melody take me to wherever it was going.

I imagined soaring through tree tops, over rivers, across mountains… like a dream, only very real.

When the song ended, I forced my eyes open again. Edward was staring at me.

"Tell her what it's called."

It could have been called 'Eat Dog Crap and Die', and it wouldn't have taken away from the magnificence of it.

Edward didn't answer, and then he looked away from me, that same overly serious expression on his face he was obviously known for.

"Sheesh, Edward, you're an absolute grump!" Alice chided lightheartedly. She then skipped off towards the kitchen.

"It was beautiful, Edward. Truly amazing. Thank you for sharing that with me."

That seemed to help his mood, because he turned to look at me again, a smile tugging at his lips.

God, I wanted to kiss those lips.

"It's called 'Bella's Lullaby'."

My jaw dropped open. I'm sure I looked very attractive like that. But what else could I do? There were no words. He had composed a song for me!

"I hope that's okay."

I nodded stupidly, then forced my mouth to close.

"You close your eyes when you're listening. What do you think about when you do that?"

"Whatever the song inspires me to," I answered.

"And, may I ask, what did your song inspire you to think about?"

_My_ song. I was drunk again. He was inches away from me, looking at me with such… adoration? Yeah, that was the word. As crazy as it was to believe, he _adored_ me.

I forced myself to answer. "Soaring over tree tops, over rivers and mountains, like how one might in a dream, only for real."

This pleased him. His smile grew.

"Bella?" Alice's disembodied voice called to me, but still I stared back at Edward. "Your breakfast is ready!"

How was I supposed to eat with all the butterflies wreaking havoc inside my stomach? I didn't move an inch.

But then Edward stood, and I guessed it was his cue for me to follow. So I did. And then he led the way into the kitchen.

Alice was holding my chair out for me, her pixie face bright, her smile wide. She looked at me like I was her bestest friend in the whole world. Maybe I was. Maybe they didn't have friends outside their own siblings.

I sat, a bit numbly, still shaking off the intoxicating effects of Edward, and grabbed my fork reflexively.

"You'll need all your strength for today," she said.

I did? Why? What was today? "Why's that?" I asked.

"Today is the day you make some interesting discoveries," she answered, and my heart stopped.

The abrupt halt in its insanely fast rhythm felt dangerous. A little bit painful, actually. But then it started up again, and the discomfort eased.

"You know this, how?" I didn't feel any closer to unlocking the mysteries. Was someone planning on just telling me?

"I'm…" She looked over at Edward for a moment, then finished with, "what some might call psychic."

I stared back at her, my eyes growing wider by the second. "Like, actually psychic?"

"One hundred percent accuracy!" she said, almost bragging, then she added, "When the circumstances are right."

Edward growled. Okay, that was the third time he had done that. They seemed to be in warning. He was trying to get her to stop telling me stuff. But I didn't want that. I wanted to know!

"Edward, stop it. Let her talk to me."

The shocked expression he threw at me spoke a thousand words, at least. Of them, he didn't know I could hear him when he growled, and he didn't know I had figured out why he did it.

Alice laughed.

"What kind of circumstances?" I asked. I was not going to let it drop easily. If she was willing to talk, I was willing to listen. More than just willing. I was hungry for information. Anything to make my research easier.

"Relax, Edward. This isn't breaking the rules." Alice looked to Esme for a moment. Her mother seemed to be giving her permission, but there also seemed to be a warning to be careful. "When people make different decisions, it changes the outcome."

"Okay, so, you can predict the future based off the choices people make? Like, say, if I decide to go to school, you'd see my day at school, but if I changed my mind and decided to stay home, you'd see my day at home?"

Alice beamed. "You're right, Edward, she is amazingly perceptive."

My heart swelled. And, apparently, I was right. But being right just brought up new questions. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure!"

Edward growled again, but this time, it was almost too quiet to hear. Alice and I both ignored him.

"Is everyone who… who has this particular secret… are they all psychic like you?"

"No," she answered. Just that simple. No elaboration.

"So, then Edward's not…"

Alice laughed again. "No. But when you figure stuff out, ask him what he _can_ do!"

Edward made no effort in hiding his growl that time.

"Edward." I whispered his name, but his eyes snapped over to me as if I had shouted it. His expression was hard at first, but it softened almost instantly. "I'm still just as confused as ever, okay? Cut her some slack."

Alice looked grateful, then her smile took over her face again. "He's going to try to distract you today. He's scared. Don't let him."

I glanced at Edward before nodding. Then Alice and Esme excused themselves, leaving him and me alone. The air was tense again.

"Are you going to try and distract me?" I hadn't taken one bite of my breakfast yet. I was too wrapped up in what was going on around me.

"Eat," he said.

He seemed to be waiting for me to do so, like as soon as I did, he would answer my question. I wanted him to, so I pushed my fork through a corner of the eggs and shoveled the piece into my mouth. An omelet with cheese and… bell peppers and onions, and maybe mushrooms.

"I have been asked not to."

"By who?"

"The family. They want me to let… nature take its course, so to speak."

He hesitated again, right before the word 'nature'. "Nature? As in, Alice's vision?"

He exhaled sharply, almost as if scoffing, and then a smirk showed itself. "Yes."

"Will you sit with me while I search?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"This is something you need to do on your own. I can't help you."

"I'm not asking for help. I'm asking for company."

"I will be nearby, when you're ready to talk. Eat."

I shoveled another forkful into my mouth. "How will I find you, when I'm ready?"

Yeah, talking with your mouth full… not attractive.

"I'm not planning on hiding from you, Bella. You'll find me."

I found myself inhaling my food. I wanted to be done so I could go up to the room and get started. I wanted answers, and if Alice was right, today would be the day I would get them. I was anxious for it. Almost nervous, but excited, too.

I cleared my place, rinsed the dishes, and set them in the sink, all while Edward watched. I could feel his eyes on me. And then I finally turned to face him.

"I guess I should get started."

He nodded, but then countered it by adding, "You don't have to do anything you don't want to."

"I want to."

He nodded again. "Then I will see you later."

There was no attempt to hide it from me. He was gone from the room so fast, I actually couldn't make out how it had happened. It was almost like a blur. Like a skip in editing, when a person is in one location, and then in the very next second, in the very next frame, they're somewhere else.

I nearly ran up the stairs to my computer.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

Thanks for the reviews, guys (and gals)! Keep 'em coming, 'kay? I post faster when I think people want to keep reading.

I'm at over ninety thousand words now, and I'm a good chunk of the ways into chapter twenty-five. Chapter twenty-four was great fun to write. It includes one of my favorite scenes thus far.

To answer a question posed to me in one of the reviews: Yes, Jacob will be in this fic, but not to any great degree. Sorry. So far, by chapter twenty-five, he's only been mentioned a few times, and he's in one scene. It's a pretty neat scene, though. (smile)

Don't forget to review! And MTLBYAKY

**Shameless Plug:**

I have written my first novel! 'The Mengliad' is available on Amazon, in both paperback and Kindle versions, and the sequel, 'The Registry's Secrets', will be available soon!

**Blurb:**

"There are a lot of beliefs out there. Some people think we got here by spacecraft. Some think we evolved, like Humans, but in a slightly different direction. Some think we were created by God, after Adam and Eve were banished from the Garden of Eden. However we came to be, the truth of the matter is, there are two species that are near-identical in every way that inhabit the Earth. One is Human, one is Mengliad."

What would you do if you learned that there was a separate Human-like species on the planet? Jessica Mitchell is about to be faced with that very question. The strange flu bug she seems to have caught quickly becomes the least of her worries. While on her way home from work, she passes out in Central Park, only to regain consciousness hours later, under the gaze of a kind but odd stranger. This Good Samaritan offers his assistance, and subsequently opens the gate to a world she knows nothing about.

Initially, Jessica is reluctant to believe what Craddock Daniels tells her, but after the unsettling reality sinks in, she feels she has no choice but to follow him and his friends. Changes are taking place, and she is now in danger because of them. Will Craddock be able to protect her? Does Jessica possess the strength to endure all that is happening to her? Can love really blossom under the direst of circumstances?

THE MENGLIAD is a romance adventure novel with a sci-fi flavor. At over 112,000 words, this story evokes a sense of how horrible it would be to have everything you knew pulled from under you.


	8. Chapter 8

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Eight

By: Jana~

**XXX**

The house seemed empty now. I didn't see or hear any sign of Alice or Esme being in the house as I headed for Edward's room. Everyone else was gone, I was sure of it. And Edward had just left.

I was actually trembling a little. I pulled the computer out of standby after placing it on the bed in front of me, and then, with shaky fingers, I pulled up a new Google window and started typing in key words. I added 'psychic', just to see what would happen. When that netted me nothing new, I typed in 'bad supernatural'.

That didn't help at all.

'Supernatural speed'. Nothing.

'Supernatural speed pale cold'. More vampire stuff! Crap!

Wait. Oh, God. My heart almost burst out of my chest. Was that the answer? Vampire?

'Vampire mythologies'.

Pale skin... check. Cold to the touch… check. Superhuman speed and strength… well, speed. So, check. Drinks blood… liquid diet? So, okay, yeah. Blood is a liquid. Supernatural abilities… Alice was psychic. Did that count? If it did, check.

It was all starting to fit. The only things that didn't were the garlic and the sunlight. But everything else… did.

I felt like I was going to pass out. Then I realized… I was hyperventilating. I took deep purposeful breaths, then stood and started pacing.

I was just about to turn away from the window wall thing, to pace in the opposite direction, when I saw him. He was outside, leaning against a tree a little distance from the house, looking up at me. Our eyes locked.

It felt like centuries were passing at the speed of light. I could scarcely breathe. My heart was literally doing flips. My stomach had dropped to my feet.

He pushed off the tree, still staring at me as he did so, then he turned and stepped slowly towards the forest. He glanced back once.

It was an invitation to follow him, I realized.

I quickly got dressed – I was surprised I could even manage the simple task – threw on my socks and shoes, then ran down the stairs. I grabbed my jacket on the way out the door.

I rounded the house, located Edward's bedroom window, then set out in a straight line away from it into the forest.

I couldn't find him. How far in had he gone? I was bound to get lost if I went too much further.

"Are you afraid?"

I spun around, but I still couldn't find him. He was close, though. I could sense it. Could he also disappear?

"Of you? No. If you were going to kill me, I'd be dead already."

Out of thin air, he dropped in front of me, a few yards away. My heart did horrible things to me. Hard to ignore, but I did try. I took in several shaky breaths as we stared back at one another.

"You're ready to talk." It wasn't a question.

"I – I think so," I stuttered. "I have a question first, though."

He arched an eyebrow, which I found comforting somehow.

"If something was thought to be myth, could some of the facts be wrong?"

"Yes."

"Okay. What happens now?"

"What do you want to happen now?"

"I want to understand better, for starters."

"Before that can happen, I need to know what you've learned."

Saying the words out loud was one of the hardest things I'd ever had to do. It seemed horrifying. Ridiculous. Life changing. I mustered my courage after taking in another shaky breath.

"You're a vampire." I wasn't asking. I knew he was.

He stared back at me for the longest time, like a statue, unblinking, not breathing. I was hyperaware of him, and he definitely wasn't breathing.

"Ask your questions."

Though he didn't outwardly confirm it, I knew he just had.

"How old are you really?"

"Seventeen."

"Okay, but, for how long have you been seventeen?"

He hesitated. Was he seriously not going to answer? We had just gotten started.

"A while," he finally said. Whispered. He was as nervous about this as I was. Possibly more so.

"The garlic?"

"Myth."

"Sunlight?"

"Myth."

Okay, so vampires didn't burst into flames in the sunlight.

"Liquid diet?"

"Yes. But not in the way you think."

"You don't kill people." Again, I wasn't asking. I just somehow knew.

"No. We survive off the blood of animals."

"Myth?"

"No. My family is different from others of our kind."

"So, there are other vampires out there who kill people?"

"Yes."

That was a little unnerving, but since people believed vampires to be myth, they obviously didn't go around slaughtering thousands. If they did, their existence would be a fact.

Or maybe they did. I couldn't wrap my brain around that, so I pushed onward.

"How did you become one?"

"Carlisle. My mother had just died of Spanish Influenza, and I was dying of it. He thought he was saving me."

_Thought_ he was saving him. Okay, Edward obviously didn't think so, or he would have said, 'Carlisle saved me'.

"You don't want to be one?"

"No. But that doesn't matter. I am one."

"Why? Why don't you want to be one?"

"I don't want to be a monster." There was pain in his voice.

"You're not a monster."

He scoffed, and for the first time since our conversation began, since falling out of the sky right in front of me, he moved. Not much. Just a little head turn as he shifted his gaze to the ground. He didn't believe that. He truly thought he _was_ a monster. I took a step towards him, but before I could take a second one, he was gone.

"Edward?"

"Up here."

I looked up, and there he was, high up in the tree he had been standing near. So, not only could he move fast, he could jump. Leap. Neither word seemed adequate to describe it. He hadn't climbed the tree, he was just up it in the flash of a second.

"Did I upset you?"

"No."

That was a lie, but I played along. "Then why are you up in a tree?"

"You were coming to me."

"Well, yeah. Is that not okay?"

"Why aren't you scared?"

Did he want me to be? "Should I be?"

"Yes."

"Are you?" I asked. I knew he was. It was written all over his face.

"Terrified."

"You don't need to be. Please, come down?"

He dropped out of the tree, stepping off the branch he was standing on like how one might casually do so from a three inch curb. I gasped, instincts telling me that from that height, he would be hurt, but then he landed gracefully in front of me, completely unharmed.

"Why do you think I should be scared?"

"I could potentially end your life."

I shrugged. "So could my dad. He owns a gun, what with him being the police chief and all. I'm not scared of him."

"He's not a wild monster, driven by instincts."

"So, your instincts are telling you to kill me?"

"Yes." He looked determined then. Like he thought that I would finally be scared. I wasn't.

"But you fight against them," I said. "It's not about potential, Edward. It's about actions. You won't hurt me." I truly believed that.

He softened a little, so I tentatively took one step forward. He tensed, but he didn't run away again.

"Why can't I come near you? We've been near each other lots of times."

"That was before you knew what I am."

"I don't care what you are. I mean, I do," I added quickly, "but not in the way you think."

He seemed amused by that. "And what do I think?"

"You think you're a monster. You think I should think that, too. But I don't. I care because you seem so tortured, and it saddens me that you are."

His body language changed. He was almost leaning towards me, like the magnet thing. Like he was drawn to me, but was too nervous to allow himself to be. I took another careful step.

This time, he didn't tense. Progress.

"Alice said I should ask you what _you_ can do," I reminded him.

He hesitated for only a few seconds. He wasn't trying to decide _if_ he should tell me, but _how_.

"I can read minds."

My heart immediately picked up pace again. It had only eased slightly from before, and now it was dangerously close to killing me.

He could read minds. He could read _my_ mind. And, of course, the first thing that came to me was how many times I had thought about him. How many times I had thought about him in a way that indicated my feelings for him.

Embarrassed wasn't a strong enough word. There would need to be a whole new word invented for what I was feeling. How much adrenalin could a heart take and keep beating?

"Breathe, Bella. I can't read _your_ mind."

I blinked, confused. "You can't?"

"No. You are the exception. The _only_ exception."

Weird. Why was that? "Is there something wrong with me?"

His laugh confused me further. Well, it was more of a chuckle, but still, he obviously found there to be something funny about my question.

And then he explained his reaction. "You're standing here, conversing with a vampire who can read minds, and you think there is something wrong with _you_?"

He had a point. Why would I just assume the fault was mine? There was probably some kind of psycho-babble about that, but I had far more important things on my mind.

I shrugged. "Was just wondering why that was."

"I don't honestly know. It's very frustrating."

"You wish you could read my mind?"

"Yes. Every day, since the first day I met you. I could hear you inside your house, while your parents spoke with you and you with them, but I couldn't read your thoughts. I could read your parents', Renee's better than Charlie's, but then, with you… nothing. I thought I might be able to with a closer proximity to you, not that I have ever needed that before, but I still couldn't. For the entire drive to my house, I tried."

That was the most he'd ever said at one time, ever. He clearly needed to get that off his chest. I was glad for it. I wanted him to open up to me.

"Does anyone else in your family have… special talents?"

"Jasper can control moods."

"Like, if someone's upset, he can make them… not be?"

"Yes."

"He seems to be afraid of me," I mentioned.

"Jasper is the newest member of our family. A new vegetarian. It's difficult for him to be around humans."

"Vegetarian?" I thought he'd said they survive off the blood of animals.

"That's what we call ourselves."

Oh. Okay. It was just the term they used. I had heard him right before. "Are there very many others like you?"

"No. It's a very difficult lifestyle to maintain."

"It is?" He nodded. "Why?"

"Instincts."

It was a simple answer, but I knew what he meant. They were wired to want human blood.

"So, Jasper's killed people before?"

He scowled. "Yes."

"Have you?"

That was a bad question to ask. I'd never seen him look so tortured.

"You don't have to answer that," I told him. And he didn't. By the pained look on his face, I already knew the answer. And it was obviously something he regretted deeply.

But he answered the question anyway. "Yes. But never innocents."

Never innocents. "I think I get what you mean…"

"I can read minds, Bella. My victims were always violent criminals."

Victims. Not 'prey', but 'victims'. Yeah, he was guilt-ridden. "So, in a way, you were doing the world a favor."

"No, Bella. No. I had no right to do what I did. I had no right to play God, deciding who should live and who should die."

I could understand that, I really could, but with the instinct to kill… at least he chose the most humane path possible. He chose his victims carefully, only selecting those who probably would have gotten the death penalty for their crimes anyway, depending on the state or country they were in.

But I didn't share my thoughts with him on that. It was obviously a difficult subject for him, and he didn't appear to want absolution. He wanted to feel guilty. Penance, maybe.

He was definitely not a monster.

"What are you thinking?"

I was honest, but careful. "I think you're too hard on yourself. But I think you feel you need to be. You hold onto your guilt and self-hatred as a self-inflicted punishment."

That time, _he_ took a step towards _me_. Okay, so, we were going to inch our way to each other. I could handle that, as long as the end result was being near him.

"Why does Rosalie hate me?"

"She doesn't."

I threw an incredulous expression at him, letting him know I wasn't buying that lie.

"You're not wrong, but it's not hate. One of the reasons has more to do with me than you, and neither reason is mine to share with you."

Right. I would have to ask Rosalie myself. Well, maybe after she stopped shooting daggers at me from her eyes.

"Is she and Emmett a couple?"

"Yes, as are Alice and Jasper."

Yeah, I had that figured out. "So, you're the only one who's alone?"

It was a subtle way of asking if he had a girlfriend, but I seriously doubted he did. With the way he looked at me, and with some of the ambiguous comments he made, I was of the distinct impression that he wanted _me_ to be his girlfriend. Which suited me just fine. I wanted to be.

"Yes."

"Why?"

Now, seriously, I expected something along the lines of, 'I just haven't met the right girl yet', but what I got instead nearly floored me.

"I hadn't met you yet."

I felt weak-kneed. They almost gave out from under me. I swayed a little, and poof, I was in Edward's arms.

I looked up at him – I think I was planning on saying thank you – but when our eyes locked, no words came. Thoughts spiraled and blurred. My entire body felt like it was going to implode in on itself.

"You don't know for how long I've waited for you."

Okay, maybe he _was_ trying to kill me. How much emotion could a heart hold, especially when it was trying to explode? Or maybe that was _why_ it was trying to explode.

"Breathe, Bella."

Okay, but how? I couldn't remember.

I had thought that knowing Edward Cullen's secrets would make things simpler. I had been a fool. This was anything but simple.

And this was far more than 'like'. Love at first sight, like vampires, does exist. Both are very real, and I was dealing with them both at the same time, in the same moment.

Suddenly, I was completely off the ground, scooped up into his arms. He cradled me to his chest protectively. Comfortingly.

"Hold on, and close your eyes."

Sure, okay. Why not? I did so, and immediately, I felt movement. Movement I didn't understand. There was a wind chill factor involved, like a tornado fan was blowing right on us. Then, as quickly as it had started, it stopped.

"You can open your eyes now."

I did, and literally startled. Hard. Edward just held me tighter to him, which was the best feeling in the whole world, I had decided.

We were in his room. He was lightening fast, I knew, but to be part of the experience was a little jarring. Why had he asked me to close my eyes? I would have liked to have seen that.

Or maybe not. With the way I was feeling, that might have been too much for my heart to take. Maybe he knew that.

Maybe he could hear it trying to race out of my chest.

"Do you have super hearing, too?"

He smiled down on me as he set me gently, effortlessly, onto the bed.

"Yes," he whispered.

That made sense. The little ear perks. Hearing my stomach growl.

I struggled to keep up with him. One moment he was hovering over me, the next he was gone. I didn't even have time to find him. Two rapid blinks later, and he was back.

And then, as his music filled the room, he joined me. He had gone to the stereo, I realized.

We were in a similar position to what we had been in the night before, but closer. I wanted him to touch me, but I think he sensed that it would have been too much for me to handle. If he did, he sensed right.

The combination of the soothing melody and Edward's calm measured breathing started to relax me after a while. It seemed he was breathing in that manner for that very purpose, like he was trying to lead me by example. I was pretty sure he didn't need to breathe at all.

I decided to ask him. I wanted to know _everything_ about him. But it wasn't in a, 'wow, you're vampire' kind of way. I had wanted to know everything I could long before I ever learned that. If I was being honest with myself, since I had first met him.

"You don't need to breathe, do you?"

He smiled. He was enjoying sharing with me. "No."

Maybe this was all new to him. Maybe the only people who really knew him were the other six occupants of this house. Well, and maybe others like him. I couldn't help feeling a little honored that I was, quite possibly, the first human he had ever trusted with this secret.

"Where did your family go?"

"Out. They are allowing us some privacy."

I was feeling far more human, as my heart rate slowed to almost normal and my breaths came naturally to me again.

"Who is it that might harm me because I know this? Is it other vampires?" Obviously, but I asked to see what his answer would be.

Pain laced into his expression. "Yes."

He offered nothing else, but I didn't press. We had covered so much ground already. I probably should have been scared, but I wasn't. I knew Edward, and most likely his family, too, would protect me.

And then my strange and wonderful new reality took a turn, to include my old reality.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

Thanks for reading. Please review.

MTLBYAKY


	9. Chapter 9

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Nine

By: Jana~

**XXX**

At first, I considered ignoring it, but before my cell phone even had the chance to ring for the third time, Edward had whooshed away and returned with it in his hand. When he held it out to me, I could see by the display that it was my mom.

I bolted upright, snatched the phone from him – I would apologize for my abruptness later – and clicked the talk button.

"Mom?"

"Baby, hi!"

"Mom. God. Why haven't you called?"

"Things have been crazy since the second we got here. And then…"

When she trailed off, I knew she had something to confess. She always did that.

"And then…?"

"Don't laugh. I lost my cell phone."

I bit back any sign of amusement. "How did you manage to do that?"

"Oh, I don't know. I had it on the plane, I swear! Maybe I lost it at the airport."

She was forever doing that. She would lose her head if it wasn't attached. "So, what, you had to buy a new phone?"

"Yeah! That wasn't easy. They don't have too many stores around here, where we're at. They weren't even sure at first how to attach it to the old number!"

That's why it had taken so long for her to contact me, I guess. But… "Where's Dad's cell?"

"He left it at home."

Sure. Given his grief, that wasn't too surprising. "They don't have normal phones where you guys are?"

"They do, but it's been crazy here." She dropped her voice to an almost whisper. "I'll explain when we get home."

Ah. Apparently, she couldn't speak freely. "How's Dad doing? Any better?"

"He's hanging in there. You know your dad. Has to be strong." Yeah, I _did_ know. "How are you? Are the Cullens treating you okay?"

"Yeah, Mom, they are." I avoided Edward's gaze as I said that. For some reason, I was embarrassed talking about his family to my mom.

"How are you getting along with the kids? Edward?"

Oh, great. Just her saying his name and my heart was racing again.

"We're all getting along great. Alice and I had a girly night last night. Hair. Makeup. She let me raid her closet." I said that strategically. I couldn't talk about Edward while he was inches away, staring at me.

"But you hate that kind of stuff."

I could see Edward tweak an eyebrow out of my peripheral vision. He could hear my mom through the phone.

Of course he could. Super hearing.

"Yeah, I guess, but it was fun. Aced that biology paper." I usually did, but I needed her to get off the subject of the Cullens.

"That's great, baby! And state testing is next week? Tuesday and Wednesday?"

Good. Successful detour. "Yeah."

"Edward doesn't mind driving you to and from school, does he? It must be awfully inconvenient for him."

Crap. "I don't think he minds."

"I know you'd probably rather have your truck, but I just feel better knowing you're not behind the wheel while we're not there."

Translated: we don't want to get the call that you've wrapped yourself around a tree when we're a long plane ride away from home.

"I know, Mom. It's fine."

"Okay. Well, I should go. We're supposed to be at the mortuary in twenty minutes. We'll talk later."

I felt a twinge of sadness when we said our goodbyes, and then a little guilty for not missing my parents more before that moment. The two realities had just seemed so separate, I had put one aside while dealing with the other. But they weren't separate. Not anymore. And they shouldn't be. If I was going to date Edward, he would have to be a part of _my_ world just as I was becoming a part of _his_.

The hand holding my cell phone dropped to rest in my lap, and then I just stared blankly at it.

Integrating Edward into my world would be tricky. It was easier for me to be in his. I knew about his family and his family knew about me. But my family couldn't know about Edward. No one could. It would limit how much time we could be around Renee and Charlie. Or my friends, not that I had many. Well, not that I hung out with on a regular basis.

Sometimes, as a group, we'd all go to the movies. Or out to eat at the diner, which was really the only decent place to eat in town. The only friend I spent much time with recreationally was Angela, and even then, I didn't very often. Couple times a month, maybe. More when we were younger, but as we got older, I became a lot more like my dad. I liked solitude.

My friends seemed to understand that about me, especially Angela. But Angela couldn't know about Edward. She couldn't know his secrets.

"What are you thinking?"

I couldn't tell him that. I didn't want to give him any reason to potentially push away from me. Things seemed so… delicate… at the moment. I would work something out. Like Alice had said: some things are worth the extra effort.

"It was good hearing her voice," I answered.

"I'm sorry."

I looked up at him, surprised. Why was he apologizing? He then answered my question, even though I hadn't said it out loud.

"You miss them."

Okay, he said he couldn't read my mind, but maybe he wasn't being one hundred percent truthful about that. I decided to put it to the test.

I thought it so hard, it was like I was screaming it inside my brain.

'I think I'm falling in love with you!'

Not even a twitch. He just stared back at me, his eyes and expression dripping with empathy.

Okay, so, until proven otherwise, he can't read my mind.

"Yeah, but I'm a big girl. I'll live."

He softened, smiling just a little, but almost wistfully.

"Such a brave little human."

There were layers surrounding and connected to that statement. On both sides, his and mine.

First, he didn't just say that about me missing my parents. It went deeper than that, to include how I was handling his secret.

Second, it truly was a compliment. It wasn't just lip service. He was sincerely amazed by how brave he felt I was.

Third, it probably should have offended me, but it didn't. The 'little human' part, I mean. I was very nearly an adult. Not so 'little', but in comparison to him, I had to acknowledge that I was.

Fourth, his approval mattered to me more than ever. I had never been one to crave the approval of others, but I did now. It was like the air in my lungs. Like the blood in my veins. It was a necessity.

And then he touched my cheek with just the pads of his fingers. Three of them only, while his thumb grazed my chin. Gently, like he was testing to see if he should. Or could. The cold temperature felt wonderful against the heat of my skin.

But then something he had said earlier jumped into my mind, so quickly that I startled.

He mistook this and immediately withdrew his hand. The scowl that followed made my guilt soar.

"You didn't do anything wrong. I just had a thought."

That seemed to ease the scowl a little, and then curiosity mingled in. I knew he was going to, so I told him what I was thinking before he could even ask.

"You were talking about instincts before. Essentially, you're wired to want human blood. You said it was difficult for Jasper to be around humans."

I hesitated then, trying to find my courage as I looked up into his eyes. He still seemed curious, but also, there was a slight amount of pain there. Almost as if he knew what was coming.

"Is it difficult for _you_ to be around _me_?"

He gulped, and the pained expression intensified. That was a yes.

"At times."

Yeah, okay, that was a split-hair debate for another time.

"I'm sorry." It was all I could think of to say. I hated the thought that I was causing him pain.

"Don't be. It's not your fault that the lion fell in love with the lamb."

Love. _Love_! Everything that could accelerate in my body did. "The lamb fell in love right back, you know."

His eyes slowly began to brighten.

"Stupid lamb, right?"

"Sick, masochistic lion," he added.

And then we were both smiling. Both were slight but easy – relaxed – yet expressed everything.

Seventy-two hours ago, I had no idea what love really was and even less knowledge of Edward Cullen. It was strange how fast one's life could change.

"They're home. Do you feel up to this?"

Up to what? Was something supposed to happen now? Was I about to be thrown into some kind of weird initiation?

"Um, I don't know. What do I have to do?"

His smile grew. "Walk downstairs. Or I could carry you, if you prefer."

Okay, I was overcomplicating things. "Walking works for me." When I wasn't tripping over my own feet.

He stood and extended his hand, and I took it eagerly. Any chance at a physical connection, no matter how slight, I would take. Instantly, there seemed to be some kind of electricity flowing between us.

His skin was cold – I knew it would be, so I didn't even flinch from it – but the other thing I noticed was that it was… hard? No, that wasn't the right word. Unyielding? Yeah, that fit a little better. I would have to give that thought later.

As we descended to the first story of the house, for the entire time of the trek, Edward stared at me. I couldn't return it, though. I had to watch my feet as they took every step, or I would face-plant for sure.

They were all standing in the living room, wearing various expressions as they faced us, when we turned the corner off the stairs. Alice looked like she was positively bursting with joy. Jasper still seemed to be in pain – I had new sympathy for that – but he had a slight smile on his face. Emmett seemed amused; his smirk made him look mischievous. Esme was smiling warmly, like she had truly just gained another member of her family. Dr. Cullen looked pleased but reflective. Rosalie looked… pissed.

Okay, if I thought for even a millisecond that knowing the Cullen family secret would ease tensions between us, that was a millisecond wasted.

Then, one by one, everyone but Edward, Jasper, and Rosalie came up to me and hugged me. It felt a little like I was being celebrated.

Rosalie glared harder than before, but not at me directly.

"Perfect. I'm glad everyone is so at ease with putting our entire family at risk."

Oh! She thought I was going to tell people. Well, I guess it _was_ human nature to want to share information this unique. But I wasn't like that.

"I would never tell anyone." This probably wouldn't reassure her. A lot of people might say that, but then turn around and do it anyway. Jessica sure would.

"She knows that," Dr. Cullen said.

"People know she's here! Our entire family will be implicated if this ends badly."

"Badly? As in, I would… become… the meal." I didn't want to offend them, but I had already started to say it before I thought it through, and I couldn't think of another way to end the sentence.

Everyone but Rosalie seemed amused by that. Edward and Dr. Cullen laughed.

Okay, yeah, they were _vegetarians_, but their instincts would always make me seem like the better meal option. It would be like starving a man to the brink of death, then throwing a barbequed steak into the room and telling him he couldn't touch it. That instruction and nothing else between him and it. Why wouldn't he just eat it?

And yet, I still wasn't afraid. I was the steak in a room with seven starving people, and I couldn't bring myself to be scared at all. That probably said something about me. It probably did about them, too.

"Trust me," Alice said, her voice filled with humor and light, "you're not on the menu."

"I know," I muttered lamely. The attention I was being shown was starting to embarrass me. I just knew my cheeks were as red as they ever could be.

"You should've seen your face when you finally figured it out! I could almost _hear_ the 'click'!" Alice then danced over to Jasper and held out her hand. When he dropped something into it, she danced right back over to me. "Now that we're officially best friends… here."

She extended her hand, palm up but still in a fist as she gripped whatever she held.

As I dropped my attention down, she relaxed her fingers out of the way.

Oh. Okay, not so bad. I usually didn't like gifts, except for on major holidays. But she seemed so happy to be giving it to me that I had prepared myself to accept it graciously, despite my feeling uncomfortable.

But this, I could handle. It was a small homemade key ring charm made of beads, two different colors on two different strands of thread that twirled around each other. One strand had purple beads – the exact color of the darkest shade of purple on my bed sheets – the other had a very light contrasting shade of green. It was either _her_ favorite color, or it was symbolic. We were kind of like opposites.

"Thanks, Alice, this is great."

She hopped up and down excitedly a few times, then went to go stand next to Jasper.

"I'm sorry if we're making you uncomfortable," Dr. Cullen said. When he did, I looked up from the gift in my hand. "Alice told us you were fine, but only she can see the visions in her head. Well, she and Edward. We were just curious."

The question popped out of my mouth before I could stop to think. I turned towards Edward and asked, "If you could see I was going to fine with it, why were you so scared?"

Emmett laughed, which caused Edward to scowl.

Crap. I should have waited to ask him that, later when we were alone. But was there ever such a thing, when every member of your household could hear your slightest whisper?

"Her visions change," Edward answered. "She could see you were fine one moment, but could not guarantee the next."

I almost forgot that we _weren't_ alone. "Why would I be fine one moment, and not the next?"

His eyes searched mine for a moment – the kind of search where he was desperately trying to read me.

"I don't know," he finally said.

"You guys should go play," Alice suggested, in that light and airy tone she always used. I was of the impression that nothing ever upset her.

Edward didn't look at her, but his eyes left mine and shifted slightly in her direction. He was reading her mind. I just knew that he was.

"I would like to show you something." His eyes were back on mine.

A simple enough request, but there was something in the way he said it. He wasn't talking about a stamp collection, or some other such straightforward thing. He was referring to something of significance.

I bobble-head nodded, and he smiled in return.

"Don't forget, she needs to eat."

Esme. Forever wanting to feed me.

For some reason, I thought he was going to take me back up to his room. But, no. He took my hand again – which reconnected the electric current between us – and led me straight for and out the door.

Okay, so, we were taking a drive? Again, no. We walked right by his silver Volvo without the slightest pause.

"Where are we going?"

He didn't answer. He only stared ahead, his expression serious again.

We rounded the house, and it was then that I realized… the forest. But why? I'd already seen the forest. I'd seen lots of forests, or, rather, various areas of what was considered the same forest. When you've seen one tree, you've seen them all.

He only led me in a little ways past the very edge of it, then he stopped. Serious Edward remained.

"We will need to run," he said to the foliage in front of him, unblinking. "Do you trust me?"

In theory. "Yes," was what I said instead.

Before I could process what was happening, I was slung up onto his back, and we were flying through the forest. Well, no, we weren't up in the air – we were still on the ground – but we were _flying_.

I locked my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist reflexively, holding on for dear life.

It was exhilarating. And a little bit dizzying. Okay, a lot dizzying.

Our surroundings rushed by us – a blur of green and brown – and the thought that occurred to me as I struggled to comprehend it was, we were going to smack right into a tree. I imagined those Tarzan cartoons, where he hits the tree with a splat and slides down it. At least we weren't swinging from vines. Sliding to the ground from this height would be inches rather than feet.

Still, I couldn't watch. I didn't want to know when it was coming. I closed my eyes, then pressed my forehead to his shoulder.

That made things much better. I wasn't dizzy anymore. I was… relaxed. The ride was soothing, like being a passenger in a luxury sedan as it drove upon the smoothest paved road in existence.

I wasn't even aware when we had stopped. I should have been – the wind wasn't rushing at me anymore – but I was so lost with the contact of our bodies that nothing made sense beyond it.

"You can open your eyes now."

When I looked up and pried my eyes open, I saw that his face was turned slightly towards me, and he was wearing the hint of a smile. But I could tell 'serious Edward' was still lurking just beneath the surface.

Gently, he lowered me off his back and to the ground, then he took my arm to steady me as I found my feet. If he hadn't done that, I know I would have fallen. My legs felt like Jello.

"Where are we?" I asked. I glanced around, but it just looked like any other forest. We seemed to be at a higher elevation, though.

"Just a little further," he said. It didn't answer my question.

But then he took my hand, and I couldn't find it in me to care.

Well, okay, I cared, but not enough to question him further.

Past the trees in the near distance, I could just make out a clearing. Purples and blues were visible, contrasting against the greens and browns, drawing me to it. Good thing that was where Edward was leading me.

It was like a meadow, grass instead of bracken, flowers instead of more trees. The sun shone upon the ground in patches as it peeked through the forest edge, illuminating everything it touched.

"It's beautiful," I whispered.

He gave my hand a gentle, almost imperceptible squeeze, then dropped it. I felt empty in an odd way almost instantly.

"I want to show you something."

This wasn't something? It sure seemed like something.

When he started to walk away, I began to follow, but then he turned to face me again, so I stopped. It surprised me when he shook his head. I wasn't supposed to follow him? Where was he going?

"You asked me about the sunlight myth?"

My heart lurched, but I found a way to nod. I was concentrating so hard on his face, I hadn't realized what he was doing until he was finished. He had unbuttoned his shirt.

He turned his back to me again and stepped directly into a patch of sunlight. For a brief second, I tensed, scared, even though he had said before that sunlight doesn't kill vampires.

"We can't be seen in direct sunlight. People would know we're different."

He faced me again, slowly, and I gasped. Loudly.

His skin didn't look like skin at all anymore. It looked like diamond encrusted porcelain.

There were no words. Nothing I could say. It was literally breathtaking. How could such beauty exist? It wasn't possible.

"Please, Bella, what are you thinking?"

And still, no words came to me. But I had to say something. So I settled on the only word my brain could scramble for, deficient as it was. "Beautiful."

He seemed wounded by the word, but not because it was lacking in its description. It looked as if he was in strong disagreement.

He turned his back to me again, and I could tell he was buttoning his shirt, but then he started walking. He glanced behind him once after several steps. I was supposed to follow.

I tried to move quickly, but my feet hated me for that. I stumbled several times. Luckily, I didn't fall. My eyes never left him.

He settled himself on the grass, in a spot that was shadier than the rest, then just watched me as I closed the gap between us.

"Did I upset you?" I asked. I knew he heard me, even though it came out in a strained whisper. But he didn't answer me.

I dropped to my knees in front of him, then shifted so that I was sitting cross-legged.

And then we only stared at each other for sixteen years.

"I'm just trying to figure you out," he finally said.

"I'm not that difficult. You can't see how I might find something like that beautiful? Your skin is like diamonds. A lot of people find diamonds to be beautiful."

I wasn't about to tell him that 'beautiful' was an understatement.

"We see things very differently… on this issue."

I couldn't have agreed with him more. He could only see himself as a monster. Black and white. No shades of gray. It stood to reason that everything connected to the monster he believed he was would be repulsive to him.

"Clearly. Want to know what I think?"

"Always."

I had to smile at that. The corners of his mouth twitched in response. "Even if you might not like it?"

He hesitated for a moment, looking as serious as ever, and then he eventually nodded.

"You can't see the beauty in anything about yourself, because you have yourself convinced that you're a monster. Can I ask you a question?" I said quickly, before he could argue.

He quirked an eyebrow, but then nodded again.

"Do you think all human beings are murderers, because _some_ are?"

If Alice had any idea what was happening right now, she would have been laughing hysterically. I almost wanted to myself. The look that came over his face was absolutely priceless. Like he had just been bested in a game he excelled at by a two-year-old who had never once seen it played before.

But then I was punished for my gloating. He found a counter argument.

"Do you think it makes a murderer any less of one because he kills one person as opposed to several?"

I didn't answer. I just posed another question. "Do you think it makes someone a murderer, because they kill someone in self-defense?"

"No, but what if it wasn't _in_ self-defense? What if it was for selfish reasons disguised as self-defense?"

He was good, I had to give it to him. "'Self-defense' is the wrong term. Let's change it. Let's call it 'survival'. I'll rephrase the question. Do you think it makes someone a murderer, because they kill someone in order to survive?"

"If they could have survived by some other means, yes."

"Did they know that at the time?"

"Yes."

I needed to get a better analogy. "Would you call an executioner a murderer, just for doing his job?"

"No. But what if it wasn't his job? What if he took on the role of judge, jury, and executioner, when he had no right to?"

"But by taking on the role, innocent lives were saved. If the danger had remained free to roam the streets, more people would have died."

He sighed as he looked away. "You won't convince me that what I did was right."

"I'm not trying to." His eyes found mine again instantly. "I'm trying to convince you that you're not a monster. Everyone does stuff they regret. You learn from it and move on. You obviously have. Learned from it, I mean. It's time to move on."

He sighed and shifted his eyes away from me again. "You're too forgiving."

"Has your family always been vegetarians?"

He raised an eyebrow, just a little, but otherwise remained perfectly still. "Some of them."

"Of the others, did they use the same… restrictions? That you did? Did they even have the ability to? Have you forgiven them?"

He took a long time to answer. "That's different."

"Why?"

He didn't have an answer to that at all.

Game and match.

But I didn't gloat. I had made my point. I just changed the subject.

"It really is pretty here."

He liked that. He finally smiled, though he still avoided eye contact.

"I'm pleased you think so."

I believed that. That he was pleased. And not just about my opinion of the meadow.

I had been wrong before. He _wanted_ absolution, he just didn't think he _deserved_ it.

Absently, I started plucking at the blades of grass that touched my hands as they dangled, playing with them and twisting them around in my fingers. And after a moment, I noticed he was watching me do so.

There was curiosity in his eyes, which I liked much better than the torment and pain.

Enough heavy subjects for now. I still wanted to know more, though.

"What else is a myth? Sleeping in coffins is one of them," I added, just so that he would know for sure what I was asking.

"Crosses and Holy water."

I gave a little nod, noting how he continued to watch me play with the grass blades. "What else?"

"We don't turn into bats."

I had to laugh at that one. There really were some weird myths out there. "What else?" I asked, encouraging him to continue. This was a good subject. Light but still informative.

"Mirrors."

It took me a second to understand what he meant by that. "Oh! Vampires can cast reflections?"

"Yes. We also photograph, as you saw when Alice took our picture."

"Hmm. Anything else?"

"Wooden stake through the heart. You wouldn't even be able to pierce the skin."

I believed that. I had noticed before that his skin seemed unyielding. I was going to need to find a better word to describe that. "So, if sunlight doesn't kill you, and wooden stakes through your heart doesn't, then how does one kill a vampire? Or is it impossible to?"

"It is not impossible. Were you planning on killing me, Bella?"

He was teasing me. His tone was playful. Amused. And yet, there was still that sense of reverence when he added my name onto the end of the question.

"Not so much," I answered, smirking.

"Why do you do that?"

When I looked up at him, his eyes locked with mine. Then he quickly lowered them to my fidgeting hands before raising them again.

Dropping the blades of grass, I laced my fingers together instead and stared at them. "No reason. Keeping my hands busy."

"Why are you friends with Jessica?"

The question surprised me, though I'd asked it of myself often enough. "I don't know. She sort of… demands friendship. I just trudge along, somewhat unwillingly. She's not a _horrible_ person," I added, "but some of her traits are… grating."

"You hesitated."

I fought the grin that threatened to explode across my face. "Only because I was trying to find the right word."

"You pretend to be her friend." He wasn't asking me.

"Not exactly. I'm civil to her. She assumes I'm her friend."

"Your parents love you."

Again, he surprised me. "I know. I love them, too."

"They're afraid."

My eyes shot up to find his. "Of what?"

"Hurting you."

Okay, he was tiptoeing around something. Like he wanted to broach a subject but wasn't sure if he should. "They're not hurting me."

"They're afraid their future decisions will."

Oh! I knew then what he was talking about. "They shouldn't worry about that," I said, looking away again. "I just want them to be happy."

"They're not."

"I know."

"Who will you choose to live with?"

It was weird how we were dancing around the word 'divorce' without actually saying it. "My mom. Charlie's great, but—" I lifted my gaze to him, and stopped dead. The pain in his expression was unmistakable. "What?"

"She wants to leave Forks."

I startled. Hard. "What? No! Why?"

"She has never liked it here. She wants to go to Arizona, or Florida. Someplace warmer."

All I could do was stare back at him, in shock, for the longest time. I didn't want to leave Forks. I couldn't. Not now. I couldn't leave Edward. I would be a senior next year. I didn't want to start over someplace else, my senior year of high school. My life was here. My friends. Well, friend.

"Will she leave if I don't go with her?"

His pain seemed to intensify. "Yes. She thinks you will choose her, but she's not sure. Charlie is."

"Charlie thinks I'll choose her, too?"

"Yes."

Wow. What did _that_ say about my relationship with my dad? That he would assume so absolutely that he had no shot of me choosing him?

"Do you know when?"

"Soon. She has made up her mind, but hasn't decided on a date."

My head was spinning. My eyes wandered. "She's probably just trying to help him through the funeral," I muttered, more to myself than to him.

"Yes. She still cares about him."

"But not enough to stay," I guessed.

"No."

Why did parents have to make things so complicated? "Then I guess I'm staying with my dad."

His pain eased a little. "You will miss her."

"I know, but if I go, I'll miss my dad. And my friends. And _you_. I'm not leaving Forks."

His pain nearly disappeared. Just a hint of it remained. He wanted me to stay. He also seemed sad for me. For the position I was in, and the decision I would be forced to make.

I didn't even think about it. It was a reflex action. I pulled up onto my knees, crawled over to him, and climbed into his lap.

He was shocked at first. I could just tell. His body language was screaming that he was. But then after a moment, he wrapped his arms around me and held me tight against him. It was comforting. It felt right.

"I'm sorry, Bella."

I nodded. That was all I could do. I couldn't speak. I couldn't cry. I almost felt numb.

I knew this was coming – I had wished for it to happen, so that my parents could be happy – but to actually be faced with its imminent arrival…

"We should leave now. You need to eat."

**To be continued…**

**Author's Note:**

To the reviewer: 'Jakeward' – Your 'P.S.' made me laugh! Thank you. And thanks for reading and reviewing!

I'm well into chapter thirty now – about halfway in, actually – and I'm at over one hundred ten thousand words. I think there might be about five chapters left to write. I know how it's going to end, but I'm not exactly sure how many chapters it will take to cover the content. As of right now, where I'm at, we're on midday Tuesday. So, just need to finish up Tuesday, and then Wednesday will take up the rest of the fic. Lots will be happening on Wednesday. (grin)

My beta rocks! Luv 'ya!

Please review, and MTLBYAKY


	10. Chapter 10

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Ten

By: Jana~

**XXX**

Just him saying it, and my stomach growled angrily. I hadn't even realized I was hungry until that moment. I could almost hear him smiling in response.

The return trip to his house was just as thrilling, and just as dizzying. Again, I had to hide my face to stave it off. Adding nausea on top of hunger would equal bad for Edward. I doubted he wanted to wear my vomit all over him.

When we got back to his house, my lunch was already waiting for me. Like they knew the exact moment we would be arriving.

Alice. As soon as we made the decision to leave the meadow, she probably got a vision.

At least this meal was simpler than the previous ones. I was starting to feel bad for wasting so much food.

The half a sandwich looked like the finest chef in the world had created it. Lettuce, tomato, two kinds of cheese, light mayo, lighter mustard, avocado, cucumbers, sprouts… and everything was in perfect balance. French fries on the side… which looked homemade, but didn't taste like they were. Maybe some people could get it right, but fries are typically the kind of thing one can't do as well at home as they can in a restaurant. And then a little bowl of sliced and cubed mixed fruits. Even the grapes were cut in half, which almost made me laugh.

I ate everything but a handful of fries, all while Edward watched. The rest of the Cullens seemed to be gone again.

My mom called shortly after I had finished eating, but I couldn't muster any excitement when talking to her. Knowledge is a tricky thing. You think you want it, but sometimes it's better if you don't have it. She could tell something was wrong, of course, but I played it off as annoyance over my English essay. Which reminded me that I would have to finish it before the weekend was up.

Edward knew I was upset. Really, one didn't need to be a mind reader to figure that one out.

As soon as I ended the call with my mom, he took my hand, kissed the back of it – and, okay, that's an old-fashioned thing to do, but, really, that should _so_ come back into style! – and then he led me to the piano room.

I could have listened to him play for hours. Maybe I did. Time was distorted again. He never tired. He could probably play for days straight and never become so.

Super stamina? Probably.

He never used sheet music. He had each song devoted to memory.

Initially, I watched him intently. His fingers danced across the keys. When the song grew passionate, he would lean in a little. As he slowly brought it to a close, his body would almost sway.

After a few songs – or maybe it was a hundred – I closed my eyes and let the music whisk me away.

Each song took me to a new location. Mountains. Beaches. Forests. Deserts. Foreign countries. Other worlds. It was almost spiritual.

And it was definitely relaxing. I wasn't upset with my mom anymore. I wasn't anything anymore but happy. Content.

He saved my song for last. My lullaby.

The song ended, but my eyes remained closed. I was too at peace to open them.

"What are you thinking?"

"This has been the best day of my life."

Truthfully, that wasn't what I had been thinking. I hadn't been thinking about anything, actually. I was still contemplating his music in the silence of the room.

But it just sort of came out of my mouth. Maybe I had been thinking it subconsciously.

I finally opened my eyes, to see that he was turned on the bench, facing me, staring at me with a quizzical look on his face.

"That surprises you." I knew it did, but I wasn't sure why.

A tiny smirk showed itself, and then he scoffed as he shook his head. "You just found out that you are staying in a house with vampires, and it's the best day of your life."

"Learning that only helped with understanding things better. It didn't change anything. And that's not the only thing that's happened today."

He quirked an eyebrow and reinitiated eye contact. He wanted me to elaborate.

We had already essentially admitted it, with the whole lion and the lamb analogy, but I still wasn't ready to say the actual words out loud yet.

But I wanted him to know that he was the reason for the statement. It _had_ been the best day of my life, and it was because of _him_ that it was. I needed to acknowledge that.

"I've enjoyed our time together today."

I found myself wanting him to say it back. I wanted him to tell me that it was _his_ best day ever. Or at least that he had enjoyed today with me, too. But, realistically, maybe he hadn't. Maybe it wasn't his best day ever. He was older than his seventeen years, I knew, though I didn't know how many more years older he was.

He had a lot of years on me. Many more days in his life that could very well have beat this day.

I was just on the verge of feeling disappointed, when, once again – and probably forever – he surprised me.

"Each day before I met you was a mere existence."

And then my heart exploded. But death wasn't what I expected it to be. There was no pain or panic. No light at the end of some long tunnel. No pearly gates or castles in the clouds. There was just Edward, staring at me, and the most euphoric feeling I had ever experienced.

"Breathe, Bella."

I did – I sucked in air like a drowning man gasps for breath after coming up from the water – and it was only then that I realized I hadn't actually died. But the euphoria remained, soon to be joined by the largest wave of embarrassment I had ever felt.

All of that emotion, all because he had said one sentence.

"Don't be embarrassed."

I had been looking away, too self-conscious to brave eye contact, but when he whispered those words, I couldn't help but glance up. And then I found myself locked into his stare, unable to move.

"If it were able to, my heart would be racing, too."

I was aware of it, but then again, I wasn't. He stood, walked over to me, then knelt down beside the chaise lounge I had been on for the last however many years since we had entered the piano room.

And then, like so many times before, we just stared at each other. We could have the most stimulating conversation, or do nothing but this, or anything else in between, and they were literally the best moments of my life.

The effects of my near death experience began to lift, and as I started to regain my head enough to think again, I realized something.

Like he had done once before, he was inhaling and exhaling in slow, measured breaths, encouraging me to follow his pattern. The first time he had done that, I thought he was just reminding me to breathe, but that was only part of it.

He was calming me. He knew my body was on overload, and he was bringing me down from it.

Maybe I should have been unnerved by the control he seemed to have over me. He could take me to the brink of death by the simplest of actions – a touch, a sentence, his close proximity – then bring me safely back from it just as easily. Instincts told me I should be concerned, but I just wasn't. Not by a long shot.

Instead, I found that I craved it. I craved the adrenalin rush, the feelings of intense love, the deep in-unison connection and sense of calm after feeling so much too fast. It was more than just a feeling of intoxication. I felt like I was on the best drug in the whole world. If someone could find a way to bottle and sell it, they'd make billions.

Fifty-four years later, give or take a decade, and I was starting to feel normal again. Well, normal for me.

"Thanks. I think I'm better now."

He blinked, and in that flash of a second, his eyes changed to amused. "Amazingly perceptive."

I didn't have long to beam with pride. Edward's ears perked, and then his expression changed.

"Alice plans on assaulting you."

I knew he didn't mean literally. But we had 'played' last night. Did she want to again so soon?

"How long do I have?"

"A minute, maybe. Say the word, and I will help you escape."

Okay, you know the children's game Tag? Yeah, the vampire version is much more fun.

The moment I nodded, I was on Edward's back, and we were running up the stairs, through his room, and out the window wall to the tree just outside it.

He paused for only a moment, smiling back at me over his shoulder as he teased, "You better hold on tight, spider monkey."

Before I could even laugh – and I did laugh, but it turned into a squeal – we were scaling the tree and jumping to the next one.

"Edward Anthony Cullen! No you don't! It's my turn with her!"

Edward laughed, but he didn't slow down. He jumped from one tree to the next, and when he ran out of those closer to the river, he jumped down and leapt across it. I almost had a heart attack, but it happened so fast, I didn't have time to worry for long. Then we were running, flying over the ground, Alice in hot pursuit.

"You got all day with her! Get back here!"

I watched some of the time, but when nausea would hit, I forced my eyes closed and buried my face in his shoulder. When it passed, I'd watch again.

Edward was obviously faster than Alice. She never did gain the ground, and after a while, I think she just gave up. I thought this because Edward finally slowed, then stopped.

"She's on her way back to the house." He wasn't even winded as he spoke.

"She's not mad, is she?"

"Not with you, and not very with me. She _thinks_ she is going to have you all to herself tomorrow."

"I feel like the new doll both siblings want to play with," I said, laughing. The idea of it was just too funny. I could imagine them playing tug-of-war with me and everything! Of course, if they actually ever _did_ play that with me, I wouldn't survive the experience. Either that or I'd be armless.

"Now that I have found you, I don't plan on sharing you… much," he added, smiling sheepishly.

Edward was capable of 'sheepish'? Interesting. And adorable.

He helped me off his back, helped me to find my sense of balance, then took my hand and led me to a large rock slab that was perfectly suited for sitting on. Taking my waist, he effortlessly lifted me onto it, and then he joined me. He hopped up to beside me – yes, hopped – and then reclined a little, leaning back on his hands behind him. If the rock formation had space to do so, I swear he would have started swinging his legs.

I had never seen him look so carefree and happy.

I sighed contentedly, then, lying back, I took in the beauty that was the sunset. There were just a few stars making an appearance, but I knew more would soon follow. I wanted to see if I could spot them when they did.

"What are you thinking?"

I chose one thought over the other, that I had just had. "You seem to be in a good mood. Happy."

"For the first time in my existence."

I smiled. My eyes drifted shut. It was uplifting to know I affected him, too. His reactions were so very different from mine. There was no flush of his cheeks, fluttering of his heart, quickening of his breath. But he could clearly see how he affected me. I almost felt at a disadvantage.

His hand closed over mine, and my smile grew wider. Such a simple gesture, yet it meant so much. It showed love, and kindness, and comfort, and protection.

I absorbed that for a moment – just basked in the feeling of it – then I opened my eyes to watch the sky again.

Whoa! Wait. For how long had my eyes been closed? It was much darker than I had expected. There was almost no light at all, which my vision took immediate issue with. I struggled to see, but I still couldn't. It was like my eyes refused to adjust.

I bolted upright, frantically looking this way and that, just to get my bearings.

"It's so dark all of a sudden."

He sat up then, too, or at least I assumed he did. I could feel his movements, but couldn't make him out at all.

"Are you afraid?"

I could hear the worry in his tone.

I had never been one to be scared of the dark – never even needed a nightlight as a small child – but this was somehow different. Ominous. You take for granted the amount of light streetlamps and houses give off when you're in a populated area. It's never truly dark. Not like this was.

But he thought I was so brave. If he knew how terrified I was, he certainly wouldn't think that any longer.

"It's just… how are we going to get back?"

"Bella…" He whispered my name, and then I felt his arms wrap around me. "I can see in the dark."

Super eyesight? The 'super' list kept growing.

"I— I'd like to go back now." I tried to keep the fear from my tone, but it was there despite the effort. I knew he could hear it, too, because he tightened his hold on me.

I wasn't the only one who was amazingly perceptive, and he had an advantage I didn't. Well, several advantages, actually.

He scooped me up, and then there was a sensation of falling. Panicked, I screamed as I wrapped my arms around his neck, grasping at him desperately.

"I have you, Bella. We'll be home soon."

His hands never left some part of me as he helped me onto his back, and then I knew we were running because I felt the wind in my face. I couldn't see anything, so it didn't make me dizzy, but I still hid against his shoulder.

I had the vaguest sense of it when he leapt over the river, but only because the wind changed. Or the trajectory did, at least. That thought comforted me.

I felt safe with Edward, but a part of me just needed to be in a house. In a building of some kind, with other people. Or, in this case, vampires. The forest didn't seem to be my friend anymore. Not since Friday, when I felt that menacing presence in the forest just off school grounds.

I wasn't feeling that now – that menacing presence – but the memory of it was niggling at the back of my mind, making me anxious.

The wind rushing at me slowed, and then stopped. It was suddenly warmer.

"We're home now, Bella. You can open your eyes."

I had never been so happy to see someone else's bedroom. His room had light. His room signified safety.

He didn't help me off his back onto my feet. Instead, he helped me around to the front of him, then carried me to the bed, where he gently set me down.

His worried scowl made me realize just how much I had overreacted. It was just darkness, and Edward would never have let anything happen to me.

"I'm okay. It just struck me weird, is all."

His expression eased a little, but then his ears perked.

"Alice is on her way up."

The word 'up' wasn't even out of his mouth when she appeared in the doorway. She looked as if she was set to snap at him for taking me away earlier, but before a single syllable even left her mouth, her eyes softened, and then shifted over to me.

"What happened? Are you okay, Bella?"

Embarrassed, but yeah, I was okay. "I overreacted to how dark it was out there. There was an incident, at school yesterday, and the darkness triggered the memory, I guess."

Edward stiffened. I could only assume it was his protective nature kicking in. I guess the word 'incident' did leave a wide berth for interpretation.

"What kind of incident?" Alice asked. Edward tensed further.

With the way he held himself, I decided that lying was my better option. If I told him the truth, he was liable to jump out the window and go on a hunting spree until he killed everything in the area, guilty of the crime or not.

"There was a blackout…" But there would be windows, stupid! "…in a classroom that didn't have windows…" And you're such a chicken you couldn't help but panic? "…and some of the kids were panicking. It was just… really chaotic. Is all."

Yeah, I shouldn't be allowed to lie.

Edward relaxed a little, but it was a very little. Alice just seemed perplexed.

"Yeah, see? It was just an overreaction. I'm fine, really."

She didn't buy it, I was sure, but she didn't call me on it.

"Well, I was going to ask if you wanted to play again, but, maybe not today."

"Yeah, thanks, no. Maybe tomorrow?" I asked in return.

"Okay, sure!" She was back to happy, and then she near about twirled herself out of the room.

Edward and I were alone again, but it felt like there were a million miles distancing us. He was still tense, and from what I could see out of my peripheral vision, he wasn't looking at me, but at the floor like it had wronged him heinously.

"Why did you lie?"

He sounded angry. But somehow, it didn't seem like that anger was directed at me.

I decided to play stupid. "What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean, Bella."

He spoke through clenched teeth, and his eyes seemed very dark. Almost black. I braved a glance to see for sure.

"Why did you lie?" he repeated.

His eyes _were_ black, but despite the fact that they were, I found myself coming clean, anyway. Or maybe it was _because_ they were. "The truth isn't much better, and you look like you're about to kill something."

His stance softened considerably, but the black of his eyes remained. "Yes. Myself."

That just confused me. Why would he want to kill himself? Because he wasn't there to protect me from something that didn't happen? Because he wasn't there to protect me from my overactive imagination?

"Edward," I sighed, "nothing happened. I don't know that anything would have."

"You were safe," he said, and then his eyes began to lighten. His anger was dissipating. "But it frightened you."

Wait. What were we talking about? What did _he_ think happened? "Briefly," I admitted.

"Until you were closer to the school." He didn't ask this. He knew it.

But how did he know? "Edward?"

He dropped into a cross-legged position by the bed – gracefully, with control – then he just stared down at the space in front of him.

"I wasn't trying to frighten you."

"It was you?"

"Yes."

"In the forest, during lunch?" I asked, to be sure we were on the same page.

"Yes."

So, it wasn't menacing. It was something else. I thought back, reevaluating the emotions I had felt at the time.

"Why didn't you say something?"

He looked up at me then. His eyes were back to the rich butterscotch color. "You thought I was stalking you. In a way, I was."

"I thought some loser was stalking me. If I had known it was you…"

"I had no way of explaining why I was there. I didn't want you to think poorly of me."

I had been sensing his guilt somehow, on Friday, in the forest. _He_ felt like he was a menace, and I had, strangely enough, picked up on that.

"I wouldn't have thought poorly of you. I would have wanted to talk with you. It would have been a far better lunch period than what I went back to, at the cafeteria. Jessica is like a pit bull sometimes, if she thinks she can get some gossip."

Wait. Whoa, back up. "Wait, were you there on Thursday, too?" I asked. Deep down, I knew the answer.

"Yes."

That's why I had felt comforted. I was listening to _his_ music in _his_ company. "Will you be there again on Monday?"

"Yes."

I knew he meant that. He certainly didn't need my permission.

"Do you want me to be there?" he asked.

But I guess he wanted it. "Yeah. I'm not usually scared of the dark, you know. It was just… _really_ dark."

He smiled. God, it was good to see him smile, especially after the murderous glare he had directed at his floor.

And then he perked to listen to something. If it was in him to do so, I would've sworn he wanted to roll his eyes. "Since you're feeling better, Alice wants to play with you."

I spoke directly to Alice, since I knew she could hear me. "Anything but dress up? I felt bad washing it away so quickly, after all the hard work you had put into it."

That was a partial truth. I _did_ feel guilty, but I just didn't want to go through it all again. Like my mom had said, it just wasn't my thing.

"She would like you to choose."

Okay. What do vampires normally like to 'play'? Besides 'Tag'? I stifled a laugh. "What kind of recreational activities do vampires normally engage in?"

His return smile was the best gift one could ask for. Better than anything from the most expensive store on the planet. Right then, I didn't want to do anything but stare at that beautiful expression for hours.

Staring was good. When doing so, we seemed to connect to each other in some deep, profound way. I briefly wondered if it would always be like that. Our relationship, consisting of nothing more than long sessions of staring, interrupted by brief periods of flying through trees and over rivers. Oh, and the piano. Him playing, me listening.

I could live with that.

"Chess?" He was asking, like he wanted to see if I was game.

"I'm not very good," I admitted.

"You won't need to be. Alice can predict your moves. She will win."

I laughed. "Then what would be the point?"

His grin turned mischievous, then he stood and offered me his hand.

It was the strangest game of chess in the history of forever. Every time I would start to make a move, Edward would discreetly shake his head at me, so I would put that piece down and make another selection. I did this until he would nod his approval.

It didn't take a genius to see what was going on. He was reading Alice's thoughts, evening out the fairness of the game. She still won, but I – or rather, Edward – didn't make it easy on her.

After that, Edward and I went back up to his room. I was hoping for another long staring session, until I eventually fell asleep, but instead we ended up talking for hours. Well, he did most of the talking. I just listened, entranced.

He had done so much with his life. He used to attend school – they all did – but after about ten diplomas each, they stopped bothering. He had even attended college! Had a medical degree and everything! He didn't feel like he could practice, though. He seemed too young to the general public, and didn't feel he could handle the situations involving blood like Dr. Cullen could.

I couldn't even remember the moment I had fallen asleep.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

This chapter contains one of my favorite scenes. Can you guess which one it is? (smile)

I am now about halfway through writing chapter thirty-one. I'm starting to feel that this fic will be thirty-five chapters, based on where I'm at now, and the content I still want to cover.

The next chapter is one of my favorites. I'm kinda excited to see what people think of it.

I'm excited to see what people thought of this chapter, too, LOL! So, please review! (grin)

MTLBYAKY


	11. Chapter 11

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Eleven

By: Jana~

**XXX**

In the morning, I was startled awake by the most disturbing sounds I had ever heard in my life. Snarling, growling, breaking, thrashing.

I jumped from the bed and flew out the door and down the hall… but I stopped dead when I reached the stairs.

About halfway up the flight, was Edward – he was in front, like he was blocking the way – with Emmett, Jasper, and Alice. Jasper was in the middle, Emmett was behind him, holding him in a vice-grip, and Alice was next to him, touching his face, like she was trying to get his attention.

Jasper looked possessed. He was the one who was growling and snarling. His crazed eyes landed on mine, and that just seemed to infuriate him further.

The railing was broken. There was glass and debris on the ground below.

"Bella, go back to the room!"

My stomach dropped to my feet. It took a second, but I finally made myself move. Fast. I was barely through the door when I felt someone enter behind me.

I spun around, defensively, but I didn't even have a second to feel relieved that it was him. Edward.

He slammed the door, then, whoosh, and he was by the bed. Whoosh, and my suitcase was on it. He started flinging my possessions into it.

What the hell was going on? I must have said that out loud, though I have no recollection of doing so, because Edward answered.

"You have to go home."

"Why?" I didn't want to go home. Not yet.

"Bella, you're… bleeding."

Confused, I started taking mental and physical assessment of my body. I glanced down, tried to feel pain, struggled to determine…

"You're not injured."

I was still confused – not surprising really, given what I had just seen. It was enough to cause Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.

"Bella, your cycle…"

Oh! Oh, God.

He was finished packing in seconds. Or maybe it was three years. Time didn't make sense again.

He took me by the waist. He held me at arm's length. He sat me on the bed. I was only vaguely aware that he was putting my shoes on, no socks.

"I need to get dressed…" I was still in my nightclothes.

"No," was all he said.

He pulled me to my feet. He slung me up onto his back. He grabbed my suitcase and the rest of my crap. Then we were falling out the window wall. As soon as his feet hit the ground, we were running, around the house and to the front.

Alice was there, holding my jacket out towards me. There was no smile on her pixie face.

I was on my own two feet, but I could barely feel that. I just knew I was.

Alice handed me my jacket, almost like she was trying to pass food to a dangerous animal.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. Then she was gone.

Edward directed me to his car. He opened the door. He encouraged me to get in.

"Seatbelt."

Numbly, I complied.

We drove in silence. I knew what had happened, but I couldn't wrap my brain around it.

"I didn't think—I'm sorry."

Silence.

"Is he going to be okay?" I asked.

"Bella, please. I can't hold my breath and talk."

He took in a short breath and… God. He was in _agony_!

I clung to my door, as far away from him as I could manage in the enclosed space. I would have leapt from the vehicle, if I could have and not been killed.

Minutes later, Edward extended his hands towards me. Cautiously, I took it.

I wasn't scared of him. I was worried for him.

After we pulled up in front of my house, he was at my door in a flash, but he paused before opening it. I could only assume he was steeling himself against the pain he would feel when I exited.

When he did finally open it, he seemed to be in less pain. Thank God.

He helped me out of the vehicle, then continued to hold my hand all the way to and through the door. I pulled mine away from his once inside, then I dropped my body onto the stairs. He remained by the open door nearby.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"This isn't your fault. You didn't know. The fault is ours. We didn't know how to ask."

That didn't help my guilt any. Poor Jasper.

"You don't have to stay, if it's too difficult for you. I'll be okay on my own."

"No. I plan to stay, unless you want me to leave."

"I don't. I just don't want to cause you pain."

"I'm fine. I have been away from it longer than Jasper has. But could I ask one thing?" I nodded. "Could you please… tend to things? It might make it easier."

Oh, God. Boyfriends often knew when their girlfriends were… But this was different.

"My suitcase…" I gestured towards the car, and he nodded.

I wanted to scrub myself raw. I wanted to rip my uterus out. I wasn't so sure I wanted kids, anyway, so what was the point to having it?

Kids are great, but I just wasn't so sure _I_ wanted to have them. Could a vampire even have kids?

Whoa! Okay, I've known the guy for a little less than four days, and already I jump to _that_? Kids? Probably marriage, if kids were involved? It was way too soon to be thinking like that.

Or was it?

Stop it, stop it!

I finished my shower, then I, as Edward had put it, tended to things.

He wasn't in my room. I tossed my toiletry bag onto my bed, then descended the stairs, to see if I could find him. Maybe he left. Maybe he couldn't deal after all. I wouldn't blame him.

As soon as I rounded the corner off the stairs, I saw him, his back to me. He stiffened.

"Not any better?" I asked.

"It's better," he answered. I kept my distance anyway. "I like this one," he said, gesturing towards a picture on the curio shelf.

I leaned a little to see which one it was, then rolled my eyes. "Yeah. Dance classes. Not such a good thing for me."

He turned just a little, and I could see his expression was curious.

"Two left feet," I explained. Then I shifted to my heels and tapped both sets of toes against the hardwood floor twice. He grinned.

My heart fluttered a little. I wanted to be near him, but there was no way I was going to do that to him. If I had to keep my distance for three to five days of each month, it was a small price to pay for the other twenty-five to twenty-eight days of closeness.

"So," I asked, hesitantly, "what now?"

"You have homework. Your English essay."

I didn't bother to consider how he knew that. He just knew things.

"Yeah."

"It's a nice day. Cloud cover, no rain."

"Is it easier for you when you're outside?"

"Yes."

Must have to do with the fresh air. Not as concentrated a… smell. I fought not to shudder at that thought.

"Won't you be bored?"

"No."

"I'll go get my laptop."

When I got back downstairs, he wasn't in the room any longer. He was probably outside waiting for me, but even with that very likely probability, I felt a little sense of panic.

I darted outside, and, sure enough, there he was, in the side yard, sitting on a blanket. He stood when he saw me.

As I approached, he gestured to the blanket – I recognized it; it was the one that hung on the back of our couch – and then he took several steps away. We would still need to be at a distance, apparently, even outside.

The essay should have been easier than it was, but the inability to concentrate prolonged me finishing it for hours. And for the whole of that time, Edward stared at me.

Glad to be done with it, I hit save on the document one last time and slammed my laptop closed.

"You bite your lip when you are concentrating."

I wasn't the only one noticing every little detail. It made me smile.

"Yeah, I guess I do." My smile dropped. "Will Jasper be okay?"

"He almost ended your life, Bella, and you're worried about him?"

"It was just his instincts. It wasn't personal."

He scoffed and shook his head, then finally answered, "He's fine."

Present tense. Okay, good. That alleviated my guilt a little.

"How is this going to work, if you stay?"

"You have windows in your room. I'll open them. Sit next to one. Don't worry, I have better control than Jasper does."

I wasn't worried about that. I was worried about _him_. "I'm not afraid of you, Edward."

"I know. You seem to have a flawed sense of self-preservation."

Did I? "How do you mean?"

"If our kind isn't trying to lure our victims, they usually have an inner sense to be afraid and avoid. You don't seem to have that."

"Lure?"

He sighed heavily. Pain slipped into his expression. "I'm the world's most dangerous predator, Bella. Everything about me invites you in. My voice, my face, even my smell. As if I would even need any of that. There's no way you could outrun me. No way you could fight me off."

Okay. No way I could outrun him. Speed. I knew that. No way I could fight him off. Strength? Made sense. He lifted me so effortlessly. Carried me on his back like I weighed no more than a feather.

"So, you have super strength, too?"

He laughed. "Of everything I just told you, that is your response?"

What did he want me to say? Well, I knew what he wanted me to say. He wanted me to call him a monster. That wasn't going to happen.

I shrugged. "Was just curious. I've seen the speed. The strength… well, you lift me like I weigh nothing to you at all, so it makes sense."

My eyes followed him as he stood. Then, he gave the tiniest gesture of jerking his head before turning and walking towards the forest. I followed.

We went in a fairly good ways – I would have never been able to find my way back on my own – and then he stopped and turned towards me. When he held up his hand to stop me from moving any closer to him, I halted without hesitation.

It happened so fast, it took my brain a second to catch up. He grabbed an unearthed root of an old stump and yanked it from the ground, then threw it off to the side like how one might casually toss their laundry into a clothes hamper.

Impressive.

And then we just stared at one another. I knew he was trying to figure out my thoughts – he had that look on his face he usually did before asking me what they were – but he didn't ask.

Eventually, he just lowered himself to the ground, cross-legged, in front of the carnage he had created. I followed suit, exactly where I was.

"What else is 'super' about you? Speed, strength, eyesight, hearing… but what else?"

"All human senses are heightened."

Smell? That would make sense, considering the events of today. Taste? Probably, but if you survived on the same liquid diet all your life, it seemed a waste. Touch? Interesting.

I nodded. "I should eat soon. I haven't yet."

Blink, and there he was, in front of me, offering me his hand. I took it, he helped me up, and then we were strolling back the way we came.

The wind was blowing a little, from the right – the side Edward was on – to the left. I was downwind. That seemed to make it easier on him.

He didn't let go of my hand until we were standing in my kitchen. We didn't have much in the way of food – my mom had been planning to go shopping Thursday, but left Wednesday night – but there was a frozen meal in the freezer. Eh, it was food, at least. Esme had spoiled me too much.

As I puttered about, throwing the meal into the microwave, grabbing a fork, snagging a soda from the fridge, Edward watched from across the room.

"What are you thinking?"

He asked that a lot. I didn't mind. He must feel almost crippled, not being able to read my thoughts, like he could others' so easily.

"Do you think Jasper will forgive me?"

That irritated him. "He should be the one apologizing to you, Bella."

"I was in _his_ home, Edward. He wasn't in his right mind at the time. I don't want him to apologize. I just want him to be okay."

He didn't respond to that, so I dropped it. Once the heat of the moment had passed – maybe in a day or two – I would explain it to him again.

The microwave beeped, so I carefully pulled my meal from it and set it on the table, to join my soda and fork. As I sat down, I glanced up at him.

He wasn't watching me anymore. His eyes were downcast.

"It's not just about instincts, is it? This is causing you physical pain."

"Yes." He seemed reluctant to admit that.

"What's it like? The pain?"

He wasn't just reluctant to answer that. He flat out didn't want to.

"Edward, please. I just want to understand."

My food sat untouched as I waited. It seemed to take hours for him to answer.

"Searing pain, like fire, in our throats."

Okay, so, not only were their instincts telling them to kill, but they were given intense pain as a punishment if they didn't.

And yet, even with all that, Edward wanted to stay with me. But it was out of guilt and obligation, I was sure of it. The knowledge made my stomach roll.

I barely touched my food. Just pushed it around the plastic container, really.

"Bella, eat."

"I am eating," I muttered.

"You're fidgeting with it."

"Your mom spoiled me. This is crap in comparison."

It was only the partial truth. Yeah, Esme had spoiled me, and, yeah, frozen convenience foods tasted like cardboard in comparison, but that wasn't the only reason I had no appetite.

For the next three to five days, Edward would stay with me, in agony, simply because I wanted him to. Simply because he felt obligated to. Guilt wasn't even close to a strong enough word.

I caught movement out of the corner of my eye and looked up, straight into Edward's firm stare. He had retrieved his cell phone from his pocket, and was dialing a number without even looking at the keypad. Then he raised it to his ear.

I saw his lips moving, but no words were audible. Just the sound of a breeze that couldn't be felt. So that's what he had been doing that first night.

When he disconnected the call and slipped his cell back into his pocket, I asked, "You have super speech, too?"

He didn't answer. He just continued to stare at me. But I saw the slightest hint of a twitch near his mouth.

"What did you say to your dad, that first night I was at your house? He came up and asked to speak to you right after," I reminded him, so that he would know what I meant.

His expression held guilt as he looked away. I had my answer just by that alone, but I pressed for a more definitive one.

"Did you ask him to come up and say that?"

He sighed. "Yes. No, not exactly. I just told him I needed help."

"Help with what?"

"Help with leaving the room. I don't have the strength to stay away from you, Bella."

"You don't have to stay away from me." I didn't want him to stay away from me. "It was because I was asking too many questions, right? That you wanted to leave the room, but felt you couldn't?"

"Yes."

The knock at the front door startled me. I shifted to leave my chair so that I could go answer it, but Edward shook his head. I didn't have time to question it.

Flash, and he was gone, and he returned almost as fast. He held a plate in his hand, loaded down with what appeared to be leftovers of the huge Italian dinner Esme had made for me on Thursday night.

Now, normal people – well, humans, normal or not – usually transport food in sealable plastic containers, but, apparently, vampires don't. There wasn't even foil or cling wrap on it.

Even though I hadn't felt hungry before, I found myself inhaling half of what was on the plate. Once I got started, I couldn't seem to stop… until my stomach threatened to explode.

"Who brought it?" I asked as I pushed the remainder away. I would store the rest in the fridge for later.

"Alice. She apologized again. She says Jasper is very remorseful."

"Could I… talk to him? I mean, on the phone?"

He eyed me for a moment, then slowly reached into his pocket for his cell. He dialed the number, again without looking, before extending it towards me.

As soon as I put it to my ear, I heard Jasper's voice.

"I'm sorry, Edward."

"Um, this is Bella," I said. Whispered. He sounded like he was in hell.

"Oh. Hello, Bella."

No, he sounded like he was in hell, purgatory, and at the dentist getting long, slow, painful root canals without the aid of anesthesia.

"Jasper, please, don't feel too bad about this. I know you would never _consciously_ do something like that."

"It's very gracious of you to forgive me. I'm not so sure I deserve it."

Boy, the Cullens sure liked to beat themselves up over stuff. "You do. Please? As a favor to me? I feel horrible for the trouble I've caused."

"You haven't been any trouble at all, Bella."

He said my name with the sweetest inflection. Not with reverence like Edward did, but with genuine affection, like how one might speak to a cherished sibling.

"I'll let go of my guilt if you'll let go of yours. Deal?"

He laughed at that, and it made me smile.

"I'll work very hard on that."

"Thank you. Here's Edward." I handed the phone back to him, then took several steps away, to hopefully make him a little more comfortable.

He spoke in soundless, rapid speech again, but said 'goodbye' in a normal pattern and volume.

"He's in awe of you," he said.

Edward seemed in awe of me, too. It made me uneasy. Maybe I had self-esteem issues, maybe I didn't, but that aside, I certainly wasn't anyone who should be inspiring awe.

I put some foil over my plate of food and shoved it in the barren fridge – it would make a nice dinner later – then I led the way up to my room. It didn't matter where we were in the house. Unless we were outside, he would be hurting.

Releasing him from his self-imposed obligation would have been the right thing to do, but I couldn't seem to find the words. And, honestly, I didn't want him to leave. Just thinking it made me feel empty inside. The only compromise that selfish side of me could find, was to make him as comfortable as possible during his stay.

Earlier, he said if he sat near an open window in my room, he would be fine. So that's where I took him.

He remained several steps behind me as we climbed the stairs and headed there, him not breathing, me breathing a little too erratically. If his reaction in the car was any indication, that simple function was like the fires of hell to him.

The moment we entered, I ran to each window and opened them. One stuck a bit, but I was finally able to pry it open. More fresh air the better.

When I turned back to face him – and I did this nervously, because I wasn't sure what to expect – I saw that he was glancing around. Watching him carefully, I noted everywhere his eyes landed. My stack of books. The papers on my desk. My collection of CDs I had haphazardly splayed on the top of my dresser. He was obviously far more organized than I was – his room actually seemed to be catalogued alphabetically – but he didn't appear to think poorly of me for it. If anything, he seemed amused by it.

And then his gaze landed on the photo album on my nightstand. I picked it up, set to hand it to him, but before I could extend it towards him, he sat on the edge of my bed. He looked hard at the spot beside him, and then stared back up at me. He wanted me to join him.

"Are you sure?" I asked.

He shut his eyes, seemingly in deep concentration, and then he nodded.

His eyes remained closed as I approached. Slowly. I wanted to give him the chance to stop me, but he never did. Once I got to the bed, there was nothing left to do but sit. So I did. Again, slowly.

I opened the album and set it across both of our laps, then waited patiently for him to be ready. Finally, his lids fluttered.

He had said in the car that he couldn't talk and hold his breath at the same time, so I did all of the talking. I went through each picture on each page, sharing thoughts, explaining events, and indicating my ages through the years. He smiled a few times – my sixteenth birthday, my seventeenth, and when I first got my truck.

When he saw the picture taken of me last year, when Angela and I both had dressed up as mythical Count Chocula type vampires for Halloween, his body shook as he laughed soundlessly.

I had forgotten about that until just then. That was embarrassing, but he seemed happy, so I choked it down and moved on.

After I turned to the end page, and shared the last of the boring stories about my equally boring life, I flipped it closed and settled the album on my lap alone.

And then I felt lost. I wasn't sure what to do next. How does one entertain a vampire? How does a simple person like me keep the interest of someone so accomplished? His world was, by leaps and bounds, far more fascinating than mine. We were vastly unequal. Completely unbalanced.

I wasn't even staring at the floral print on the cover anymore. I was seeing _through_ it.

While we were in his world, he showed me things I never knew existed. Made me feel things I never dreamt possible. I had wanted our two worlds to merge, but now that they were starting to, I could see how truly inadequate I was.

Shaking my thoughts away, I shrugged, then stood to place the album back on the bedside table. I knew he was staring at me, but I couldn't bring myself to turn around and face it. He would see it in my eyes. Know I was troubled.

He knew it anyway.

I felt his hand on my shoulder, and before I could stop myself, I spun around and fell into his arms. He said nothing, of course, because he was still holding his breath, but expressed everything with the gentle placement of his hand on the cradle of my head, and with the way he rocked me ever-so-slightly.

Even with all my self-considered inadequacies, he loved me.

I don't know how we got there – I could only assume we had inched the distance after a million indeterminate minutes – but we were back at the foot of my bed.

His hand left my hair, and then they were both on my waist, pushing carefully to create a sliver of space between us.

His eyes were intense when I finally met them. Determined. Still he said nothing, but conveyed everything. He wanted me to know that he knew where my thoughts were, even though he couldn't read them.

He urged me to sit with a gentle downward pressure, and then he backed away from me. Slowly. His eyes still on mine. When he reached it, he lowered himself into the chair by the window.

Then he took in a cautious breath, and when he did, I held my own. Waiting. Worried. He winced a little, but otherwise showed no outward sign of discomfort. But I knew it was a mask.

I had to let him go. I had to. It was far from a selfless act. The guilt was killing me.

"You don't have to stay. You're in pain, I know you are."

"The pain is worse when not in your presence. Different, but worse."

I ached to be near him right then. I wanted to go to him, crawl into his lap, live there for an eternity, but I knew I couldn't. It was like the starving man and the steak analogy, only I wasn't the steak anymore. He was, and I was the man on the brink of death.

A simple instruction alone kept me from saving my life.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

Okay, I'm done writing this fic. It is thirty-three chapters long, and is roughly one hundred twenty-two thousand words. I have to go through and fill in a few bits of things here and there, though, especially in the last two chapters.

I'm going to try to stick to a Monday-Wednesday-Friday update schedule, but I can't guarantee it.

Reviews encourage me to post faster. It only takes a sec, and is completely painless, I promise.

MTLBYAKY


	12. Chapter 12

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Twelve

By: Jana~

**XXX**

"Tell me about the day you changed?"

We had hours to kill – days – and we needed to find some way to fill in the time. Talking about my life wouldn't do that. I would run out of things to say within a few hours, _if_ I shared slowly and left no day unmentioned.

"What did you want to know?"

"You were dying of Spanish Influenza?"

"Yes."

"Was it painful?"

"At times. Mostly, I was delirious."

"Did you know what was happening? Did you know you were dying?"

"In moments that I was lucid, yes."

"And then Carlisle found you?"

"He was the treating doctor of the ward."

"Did you know what he was doing? What he was going to do?"

"Only seconds before."

"He didn't give you a choice?"

"I was unresponsive."

"What was it like?"

"The venom was excruciating, but what Carlisle did was much worse."

"How so?"

It took him a while to answer. I wasn't so sure he wanted to. He seemed conflicted, struggling between wanting to tell me and sparing me from the details. Eventually, the former won the battle.

"When we taste human blood, a sort of frenzy begins. It's almost impossible to stop."

_Taste human blood._ "So, that myth is true? You change a person by biting them?"

"Yes."

"Have you ever changed anyone?"

He didn't like that question. He scowled.

"No."

"Does a person have to be dying? To be changed?"

"No. That's just Carlisle. He would never do this to someone who had another choice."

"Is this subject making you uncomfortable?"

It seemed to me that it was. He seemed to grow tenser with every question I posed.

"I understand that you're curious."

Translated: I _am_ uncomfortable, but I'll answer your questions anyway.

He was hurting enough with the physical pain he was enduring for me, because of me. I couldn't add emotional pain to that.

"What do you want the sleeping arrangements to be?"

The randomness of the subject change caused him to raise an eyebrow at me.

"You sleep, I watch."

I couldn't help but smirk. "You have to sleep sometime."

"No, I don't."

Well, now he was just being ridiculous. "Edward, I won't have you losing sleep because of me. What do you think is going to happen, if we're both unconscious?"

There was the slightest twitch of his mouth. He was finding me amusing again.

"Bella, I don't sleep."

Wait. What? "Ever?"

"No, not at all."

"Don't you get tired? Don't you get _bored_?"

"No. Yes."

In that order. He never got tired, and yes, he got bored.

"What do you do to pass the time?" It dawned on me as soon as I asked the question. "The piano."

"Among other things, yes."

"Like?" Maybe there would be a clue in his answer, so that I would know how to entertain him.

"Hunt, read, swim, run, chess, drive, learn…"

He trailed off, letting me know by doing so that the list was endless. And it wasn't exactly helpful to me, either. Running would require me to be on his back. In my current… condition… that would obviously be painful for him. We couldn't go swimming – I didn't have a pool and I was sure the river would kill me with its frigidness. There was nothing I could teach him. No book I had that he probably hadn't already read.

I would pose no challenge to him in chess. Driving – an enclosed space. No. Hunting…

"What do you hunt?"

He stiffened. Was that a bad question?

"Animals."

His inflection told me to drop it. Something about that was very upsetting to him. I honored his unspoken wish and changed the subject again.

"Do you like watching TV?"

Okay, it was a lame question, but he relaxed considerably when I asked it, so I felt it was a successful detour.

"Occasionally. It seldom holds my interest, though."

I couldn't argue with him there. I would almost always rather read. Or listen to music.

But his answer did tell me one thing. I couldn't use the idiot box, as my mom liked to call it, as a way of killing time. We had a few board games, but really, they might just as well have been called 'bored games'. Roll dice, move piece, read card, repeat. Not very stimulating for most people, let alone a vampire. Video games at least offered some hand to eye coordination, but I didn't even own a system.

Playing cards didn't seem a viable option, either. What were we supposed to do for the next three to five days? If we couldn't be near each other… if I couldn't ask him questions for fear of upsetting him… if sharing more of my life story would likely put him to sleep – which I guess would be a feat since vampires don't sleep… What was left?

"What are you thinking?"

"That you're going to be bored to tears here for the next however many days."

"I can't shed tears."

Okay, so the 'super' list had competition from the 'can't' list. "What else can't you do?"

His eyes narrowed a little, but he didn't seem angry. No, he wasn't angry. He was something else. It was like concern mixed with… frustration?

"I can't bear how uncomfortable you are in my presence."

Oh. Yeah. I had guessed right, apparently. "I'm not… exactly."

His eyes narrowed a little more.

"I'm just… not sure how to entertain you. I don't have much to offer."

Okay, there was a double meaning there. The entertainment value of my world was far from stimulating, but I was also referring to myself. Next to him I was a nothing. A nobody. How could I possibly hold his interest for long?

And then, once again, he made me question whether or not he could actually read my mind after all.

"Bella, you offer me everything just by breathing."

I was so strongly drawn to him then – like he was the most powerful magnet and I was but a flimsy piece of metal – that I almost went to him. I actually twitched to move, but then I remembered I couldn't and stopped myself. He noticed it, though. Of course he did. He noticed everything.

He took in a breath, held it, and then nodded. I didn't even think about it. I just launched off the bed and into his lap.

We were a perfect fit, like two puzzle pieces that were created decades apart, but meant to be together. Or maybe he was even older than that. I would ask him at some point, but not just then. I was too content to start another question and answer session.

I snuggled into him, my forehead against his neck, and just breathed him in. It was calming and exciting, both at the same time, like his scent was a perfume created for me and me alone.

We didn't speak after that. Not for hours. We didn't need to.

I would struggle for the rest of my life to understand what he saw in me – I knew I would – but I didn't care. Whatever it was that he saw, I was grateful for it.

We spent the rest of the day in that position. We read my favorite book together like that, in the chair by the window, me in his lap. I held the book, and he read it over my shoulder. When he would finish reading the pages – he was always done before I was – he would just stare at me until I turned them.

At night, he sat with me on the bed until I fell asleep. In the morning, he woke me up, gently, by brushing my hair from my face.

I _so_ didn't want to go to school. But when I suggested ditching, Edward shot me a stern look and shook his head.

Resigned, I took my shower and got ready. Breakfast, courtesy of Esme, brought to me by Alice, was waiting for me on the table when I stumbled downstairs and into the kitchen.

Edward was standing in the corner again, waiting. He looked pensive. He seemed burdened.

I took my seat, lifted my fork, but then I just stared at the food. Something was wrong, I could just sense it.

"You should eat, Bella."

Maybe it was low of me to do so, but I did it anyway. I used his own game – a game he had played against me before – and turned it around on him.

"I'll eat if you talk."

He looked up at me then, but I only knew he had because I saw the movement out of my peripheral vision. I was still staring at my plate, fork poised at the ready but unmoving.

"What did you want to talk about?"

"Whatever it is that's bothering you. Don't try to deny it," I added quickly. "I can tell something's wrong."

There was a long moment of silence before he spoke again.

"Alice had a vision."

I took a bite of my waffle, that was topped with some sort of raspberry sauce, then stared back at him, waiting.

"I won't be able to drive you to school on Wednesday."

"Why?" I asked, then I stabbed another piece of waffle and shoved it into my mouth.

"The sun will be out."

Was that all? That didn't seem like such a big deal. Not one enough to explain his current demeanor.

"What aren't you telling me?"

When I didn't take another bite, he shifted his pointed gaze down at my plate, then brought his eyes back up to mine again. I complied.

"Your truck is in poor condition."

I knew that. I struggled with it on a near daily basis. It didn't usually stop me from driving it, though.

Then it hit me. What he was implying.

"Alice saw something happening to me?"

"If you drive your truck, yes."

I could see him wince, like he was reliving whatever Alice had seen. He didn't seem to care about my breakfast anymore. I didn't care about it, either. But there was an obvious, simple solution. I just wouldn't go to school on Wednesday.

"Then I'll just stay home," I told him. "I'm sure I can get a makeup day for the test."

"That won't be necessary."

It wouldn't be? I was becoming more than just a little confused. "Why's that?"

"You will drive my car."

Okay, sure. I could do that. So, why did he still look anguished? "Did Alice see everything being okay if I do?"

"Yes."

"Did you think I'd say no to driving your car?"

"No."

"So, if the problem is solved – if nothing's going to happen to me – then why are you still upset?"

He dropped his attention to the linoleum tile, his expression even more pained than previously.

"You're such a frail little human, Bella."

Oh. He wasn't worried about _this_ problem. He was worried about _future_ problems. Alice's vision had apparently rattled him badly.

I moved to stand, my chair scraping the floor, which called his attention back to me.

"Brace yourself. I'm going to hug you now." And by 'brace yourself', I meant 'hold your breath'.

He did, and then we were in each other's arms. He held me desperately, almost to the point of hurting, but I didn't care. It felt good to be able to comfort him. To reassure _him_ for once.

And it did seem to. He was more relaxed when I sat back down to finish my breakfast. He even laughed when, as I stood to leave the table, I caught my foot on the leg of my chair and almost did a face-plant right in front of him. The fridge stopped my fall, but I almost ripped the handle right off the door due to the momentum.

I should have been embarrassed – under normal circumstances I would have been – but it was just so great to see the lighthearted side of Edward again, I couldn't bring myself to feel anything but happy.

He let me drive to school. He wanted to be sure I could handle a car that wasn't held together by wire and electrical tape. Wanting to minimize his pain, I rolled all the windows down from the master controls on the driver's side door. Even though it was obviously helping him, he complained.

Not for any other reason than because he didn't want me to catch a cold. I didn't care if I did, but just to appease him, I turned the heater on full blast. He eased up after that, but he kept touching my cheek periodically to be sure I was warm enough. I guessed I was, because he didn't insist I roll the windows back up, and because his hand felt especially cold against me.

His car was fun to drive. I could see why he liked to go fast. My truck would always rattle if you tried to push it past forty miles per hour. His car took to forty like we were standing still. I could almost hear her taunting me: is that all you got? She was obviously used to Edward's way of driving. I gave her a little more, just to shut her up.

I don't know, his car seemed like a 'she' to me.

And through it all, Edward was amused.

When we pulled into the parking lot, there was Jessica, by the curb, watching for us. I was successful in stopping myself from rolling my eyes, but I wasn't at all so in stopping the groan that escaped me.

I slowed to a crawl as we approached the unloading zone.

"The forest. Lunchtime," I reminded him.

He smirked as he nodded.

Jessica's face was priceless when she saw it was me who was driving. She looked like she had just seen a celebrity dance naked across the campus.

I was aware that Edward was exiting the vehicle at the same time I did – made sense, since he would have to move to the driver's seat – but I wasn't expecting him to be waiting for me, on the sidewalk, mere feet from where Jessica stood.

His smile was so alluring, I couldn't help but gravitate to him.

"I will see you again at three, Bella," he whispered, but loud enough to be heard. Then he took my hand and kissed the knuckles.

Remember how I said they should bring that very old-fashioned gesture back into style? Yeah. They should pass a law, bringing it back.

I stared back at him stupidly, locked into his gaze, oblivious to the world around me. Jessica could have been flashing me, for all I cared.

I remained stuck on stupid as I watched him round the car, slip into the driver's seat, and speed off out of the parking lot. It wasn't until Jessica started screeching, that I was pulled from my trance. Somewhat.

"Oh! My! God! What was _that_?"

She had taken the words right out of my mouth.

"He's just… old-fashioned," I answered, still a little dazed. I just knew I wouldn't be able to keep up pretenses with her. Oh, not that I planned on telling her one thing that wasn't her business, but I knew I wouldn't be able to dodge her questions gracefully.

"He was looking at you like he's _in love_ with you!"

He was, wasn't he? I knew he was – though _why_ I had yet to determine – but to see it so clearly like that…

"You're in love with him _too_! I can tell! How long have you known him _really_?"

"Four and a half days." I shook my head, trying to clear it, then started off towards my first period class. She was like a shadow beside me.

"You are _so_ lying! No one falls in love that quickly, except in movies!"

"I think you might be seeing what you want to see," I told her.

"You seriously expect me to believe that that was _nothing_?"

Oh my God, shut up. Leave me alone! I just wanted to think. Remember every last detail of that entire moment.

Luckily, Angela came to my rescue. She had no way of knowing it, but she had just saved me from a week's worth of detention.

"Finished up the editorial for Friday's run. Can you take a look at it for me?"

I glanced at Jessica before nodding, then eagerly took the neatly typed paper from Angela. I didn't even read it. I knew it would be perfect anyway. I just used it as an excuse to ignore Jessica.

"Jess, don't you have to get to class?"

God, I love Angela. I would buy her a present for that.

Jessica huffed and stormed off. Clearly, she wasn't ready to give up her interrogation of me.

"She's a little hard to be friends with sometimes, isn't she?"

I pulled my eyes from the article and smiled back at her.

"She is who she is. This is perfect, by the way," I added. She beamed in gratitude. "Did you get the pic of the swim team to go with it?"

"Yeah, they agreed. Today, after school."

"Excellent." We started off towards our class then, and, typical for Angela, she didn't even attempt to pry. She only offered to lend me her ear.

"If you ever need to talk, you know I'm there for you, right?"

I nodded. "I know."

"Eric and I were thinking about getting a group together for Friday night, to go to the show. A kind of celebration for surviving state testing. Jessica might be there, but I'm sure if we sic Mike on her, she'll leave us in peace. You up for it? You could… bring Edward along, if you wanted to."

It was a genuine offer. I knew it was. But… was Edward ready for a step like that? A giant leap, really, into _my world_?

"I honestly don't know what I'm doing Friday," I said, "but if there's any way I can… sure."

We entered the classroom then, and automatically moved towards our adjoining desks.

"He seems very sweet. You deserve a sweet guy, Bella."

Had she seen what had happened in the parking lot? Probably. My cheeks flushed.

"Thanks. He is."

"I'm dreading testing tomorrow. You?" she asked.

I could feel the color ease a little from my face. I needed to be off the subject of Edward. Even though I knew Angela would never purposefully embarrass me, just talking about him _did_. My nerves, when it came to him, were just too raw and exposed.

"A little, but mostly because it's tedious."

A thought occurred to me, as we discussed just how tedious the state testing was. Well, she discussed, I nodded or shook my head at all the right moments. Maybe Angela would be willing to help me.

Well, yeah, I knew she would. She was a people-pleaser. It often netted her nothing but trouble, from those who would exploit such a giving trait. I rarely asked anything of her, because I knew she would agree to whatever, even if she didn't want to. I didn't like putting her in that position.

"Hey, Angela, could I maybe ask a favor?"

"Sure!"

"You can say no, okay? Don't agree just for the sake of it."

She grinned at me, and I found myself smiling back. We knew each other too well.

"Could you maybe run interference for me today?" She seemed confused, so I explained. "Jessica will _not_ leave me alone. She thinks she smells gossip, when what she's really smelling is her own overly-used perfume." Angela laughed at that. She was good for my ego. "I don't want to sit with her at lunch, but I can't avoid her if she tracks me down, which she will."

"Consider it done. I have her in my class, period before lunch. I'll stall her."

That was the second time today that Angela had saved me.

"Thanks. I'll owe you one."

"Come with us on Friday, and we'll call it even."

It was the least I could do. If Edward didn't feel comfortable, I could always make up an excuse for why he couldn't show.

"Deal."

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

The last chapter received some very encouraging reviews. Thank you! And one from a familiar 'face'! (waves at GoldenBeliever)

I thought I was done writing this fic, but some new ideas hit me, so… well, it now seems that it will be thirty-four chapters, instead of thirty-three. And I'm also considering writing an epilogue chapter. Not sure, though. I'll keep you posted on that.

Please review! And MTLBYAKY


	13. Chapter 13

**Two Weeks**

ChapterThirteen

By: Jana~

**XXX**

Lunch could not come fast enough. I fidgeted through most of the period, which earned me a scowl from the kid sitting next to me.

Angela would only be able to stall Jessica for so long. She would probably ask her about Friday, though I suspected Angela didn't want her there any more than I did. I especially didn't want her there if Edward agreed to come along.

If we went out to eat first, would that make him uncomfortable? Would he just not order? Order but not eat it? Would the others notice? Would it add to the rumors?

Would the movie bore him to non-tears? What movie were we even going to see? God, what if it was a vampire flick? I struggled to think if there were any due out, but I couldn't remember.

I was so caught up in my racing thoughts that I jumped a foot when the dismissal bell rang. The scowling kid next to me laughed. I couldn't think of his name. I had too much going on inside my head to care.

I gathered my stuff, then rushed out the door. Angela was obviously successful in her mission, because it was a clear shot, straight to the forest. I dropped my backpack by my favorite tree, then spun around a few times, trying to locate Edward.

"You were fidgeting in class."

I smiled at the sound of his voice, even though I had no idea where he was.

I glanced up in the tree I was near, but still didn't see him.

"What were you thinking?"

My smile grew. "That I couldn't wait to see you," I answered. "I still can't wait to see you."

I heard him laugh, and then, suddenly, he was right in front of me. I took a tentative step towards him, but when he opened his arms to me, I sprinted. It was like hitting a forgiving rock, but nothing had ever hurt so good.

"This morning…" It came out like words on a breath. Just remembering it made my voice fail.

"Yes. I'm sorry for adding to your troubles with Jessica."

Did he think I was upset with him? I wasn't. Far from it. "I wasn't talking about that. Boy, when you say you can 'lure', you're not kidding."

I meant it a little like a joke, but it was absolutely the wrong thing to say. He tensed, almost to the point of literally being a rock in my arms.

"Edward, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you."

"But it is like that. You might not care for me, if not for this ability."

"You think that's why I like you? Because you _lured_ me into it?" He didn't answer. "People like people for lots of reasons. Some like jocks – their ability in sports. Some like nerds – their ability to understand rocket science. Some like musicians – their ability to strum a guitar. I don't care what your abilities are, Edward. It doesn't change how I'm feeling. And I wouldn't change how I'm feeling for anything else on this planet or others. You can keep on _luring_ me all you want."

He softened, and then he pulled back and stared straight into my soul. "You have a question to ask me?"

Did I? I couldn't hear myself think. The pounding of my heart in my ears was deafening.

He grinned. He might not have liked the idea that he could lure me before, but he apparently had changed his mind after my little speech. He seemed thrilled, almost cheeky, that he could turn me into a liquefied mess.

"Something about Friday?" he said, reminding me.

Oh! Right! "Um, yeah, you caught that?"

"I did."

"So, what do you think? I kinda have to, after Angela's help today, but I could make an excuse—"

"Bella," he interrupted, whispering, "I would love to go on a date with you."

A date. An actual, honest-to-God date. I smiled back at him, but it dropped when I remembered why I had been fidgeting.

"What if they want to go out to eat first?"

"I can eat. Getting rid of it is unpleasant, but I will survive the experience."

"In what way do you get rid of it?"

"It would be impolite to use the term. Let's just say… it takes a reverse journey."

Oh! I had to _really_ force myself not to laugh. He would need to hurl it back up. Which wasn't funny in and of itself, but the way he phrased it _was_.

"I'm not sure what movie they'll choose. It might suck."

"I won't be going because I care what movie we will be seeing."

I could just imagine it. Sitting in a dark theater, holding hands, watching the screen blankly as we only paid true attention to each other. It sounded like a pretty good evening to me.

"My friends might be annoying. Jessica will probably be there. They might be… a little too curious about you."

"I have avoided detection for over eighty years. I think I can handle your friends."

I gasped. I couldn't help it. That was the first time he had indicated his true age.

His smile faltered slightly. "Is something wrong?"

"When were you changed?" I asked. I had to know now, and math was impossible in that moment. "What year?"

My reaction made sense to him then. His eyes showed understanding.

"Nineteen-eighteen."

He started to pull away, but I fought to stay with him. If he really wanted to, he could have gotten away from me. He obviously didn't really want to.

"Sorry. I'm just a little surprised. I didn't know. I had wondered…"

It made sense, though. Four years of high school ten times. College. Composing hundreds of songs. Some of his compositions _sounded_ like they were from a different time period. His speech seemed that way, too, sometimes. Even his manners and chivalry indicated an earlier era.

Oh. Right. Spanish Influenza. I should have realized from that. We had learned about that in class last year. I guess History isn't my best subject.

I directed our conversation back to our date. He was happy when we had been discussing that. Now he just looked concerned.

"I'll get all the details from Angela, as soon as she has them, so that we'll know what we're facing. I'll tell her I called you from my cell during lunch, and you said you were free."

He relaxed a little, which I was grateful for.

"Angela is a good friend. Her thoughts are very honest."

I smiled at that. It didn't surprise me. She had a way about her, where you could just tell she was genuine. Unlike…

Wait.

"What are Jessica's thoughts like?"

He scowled a little. "They are rarely what she actually says."

I pulled away from him, which he allowed, then I took his hand and led him towards my tree, which he also allowed. When I sat, he sat. Him with controlled grace, me like a ten pound sack of potatoes being dropped on the floor.

"I don't want to know anything that isn't my business," I said, prefacing what I was about to ask of him, "but what does she _really_ think of me?"

He hesitated. If he didn't want to tell me, I wouldn't press for him to. But then he answered me, in what seemed like careful choices of words.

"She thinks she is better than you. She doesn't understand why people like you. She is only your friend because they do."

There was more to it than that, I was sure of it, but it was enough to confirm what I had already suspected. There always seemed to be something there. An odd look, a jealous glare, a comment slipped.

"Did I upset you? Should I not have told you?"

"I'm fine. You didn't really tell me anything I didn't already know."

"She's wrong, you know. You are worlds, galaxies, better than her. Her thoughts alone make her a very ugly person."

I shrugged in response.

"You don't believe that?"

"It makes me uncomfortable to think of it like that. I don't know what happened to make Jessica like how she is, I just know that I'm not anyone special. I'm not _better_ than her. She is who she is and I am who I am."

"You think too little of yourself."

It was a serious conversation, and yet I smiled.

"Why is that humorous?" he asked.

"I could say the same thing about you."

He smiled then, too, though his following words held solemnity in them. "I don't think it, I know it. I am who I am as well."

Our time was precious, so I didn't want to start that debate right then. We had time for that later. I was bound and determined to get him to see the truth about himself.

Instead of responding, I just crawled over to him, slowly, on my hands and knees. My jeans would be wet and probably muddy because of that, but I didn't care. His smile seemed to be encouraging me. _Luring_ me. When I reached him, I settled myself into his lap, into the safe and comfortable position we had spent most of Sunday in.

He seemed to be doing better with me in close proximity, while in my _condition_. We were outside, which I'm sure helped, but it still seemed a bit easier for him than it had been previously. He was talking. He was _breathing_.

I didn't ask him about it, though. Mentioning it would bring it to the forefront of his mind, and then maybe it would become harder for him again.

"Jessica is very angry. You will be receiving a text message in less than a minute."

Oh, joy. I didn't even want to move to answer it. "What will the message say?"

"'Where are you this time? You can't tell me you're not avoiding me. Is it true you're bringing Edward with us on Friday? Get your…' _expletive_ '… to the cafeteria now.' All surrounded by multiple exclamation marks."

I laughed, then rolled my eyes. "Yeah, the woman loves her exclamation marks. Did Angela tell her about you?" It was okay if she had. If she did, it wasn't for malicious reasons. I was just curious.

"No. Well, not exactly. She only mentioned her conversation with you about it. Jessica arrived at her own conclusions."

Just then my text message ringtone started sounding. Originally, I had planned to ignore it, but curiosity got the better of me. I struggled to fish it out of my pocket due to the position I was in, then pulled up the message and read through it.

Yep, word for word, except the _expletive_ was the word 'ass'. And there were an insane amount of exclamation marks. About seven or eight after every sentence.

I rolled my eyes, clicked out of text message mode without replying, then moved to put my cell back in my pocket. But Edward stopped me. He took hold of my wrist, bringing the phone to back in front of me.

"I would like you to have my cell phone number. If you would like to have it."

I didn't think my fingers could fly over a keypad so fast. I pulled up my address book, established him as a new contact, then waited eagerly for him to give me the number. I would have to find a special ringtone to assign to him.

I gave him my number, too, then I tucked my cell away and snuggled into him once again.

"This is a much better lunch period," I whispered, content.

"Hmmm."

I melted a little. His hum was lulling. Soothing.

"Can you still be here on Wednesday, even though you can't drive me to school?"

"Yes."

"I hate state testing. The schedule is all screwed up, and everyone gets weird. Tense."

He would be my anchor through those two days. My thirty-three minutes of sanity.

For the final eighteen minutes remaining, we sat in silence. Well, not complete silence. He hummed to me. My lullaby. He had perfect pitch and tone, of course. His musical talents obviously extended beyond the piano. It made me wonder what other instruments he could play.

I had to force myself to go back to class. I didn't want to leave him. But he just stared at me, in that stern way he did when I would attempt to shirk my responsibilities. I couldn't argue after that.

Mike Newton was twelve kinds of excited about the Friday trip, when I got to Biology. Angela sure was efficient. She had probably made the rounds at lunch.

"Where have you been lately?" Mike asked me, whispering so Mr. Molina wouldn't hear. "Jessica thinks you're avoiding her, but where do you go?"

"I'm not avoiding her," I whispered back. I ignored the other part of his question. Jessica had probably put him up to asking.

"Is it true you're bringing Edward Cullen along on Friday?"

That didn't take long to get around. "Yes."

"Wow. Is he even allowed out in public?"

Anger seethed, but I held it in, and held my tongue. "He's not a prisoner. Of course he's _allowed_ out in public."

"No, I mean, _can_ he be out in public? Doesn't he have a weird skin condition? Isn't that why they're all homeschooled?"

If Jessica thought she would get the answers to her questions by having Mike ask them for her, she was sadly mistaken.

"Obviously he can be out in public, if he's coming along on Friday. Shhh," I hissed. "Listening."

He seemed a little taken aback by my shushing him, but at least he stopped pestering me.

Gym wasn't much better. Well, in the locker room before Gym.

"Where do you keep going? You can't tell me you're not avoiding me!"

I was set to dress out, but decided against it at that very moment. Dressing out meant subjecting myself to her for however long it took to change.

"I'm not avoiding _you_. I'm avoiding _everyone_. I just wanted some alone time. It's not personal."

I grabbed my stuff and walked away after that, before she could argue or question me further.

I had the perfect excuse for not participating in class. A lot of girls used it during their _time of the month_. I never did, so I was due to be excused. I sat aside on the bleachers and read a book, all while Jessica shot me dirty looks. She even missed a pass, because she was so busy insulting me with her eyes, she hadn't been paying attention.

Since I didn't have to revisit the locker room to change after class, I was able to successfully avoid Jessica before English. During that period – the final period of the day, thank God – she texted me three times, demanding I wait for her after class.

I wondered how badly I would injure myself if I _ran_ to Edward's car after the dismissal bell. Knowing Jessica, she would probably track me down. Run after me. Chase me. Scream questions and accusations at me.

But all those considerations became moot.

I had my crap at the ready, set to sprint for the door the moment the bell sounded, but as the seconds ticked down, I glanced towards my route of escape. And then my heart stopped beating.

There was Edward, standing just beyond the doorjamb, staring at me. When our eyes caught, he smiled at me – the sweetest sight in the world – and my heart raced to life again.

Unfortunately, Jessica saw him, too. Her final class of the day was just down the hall.

I was out the door and steps away when she came running up, trying to get to him first.

"Edward, hi! I hear you're coming with us on Friday!"

Edward was _not_ pleased. He was glaring at her for her little stunt – she had literally _bumped_ me out of the way, knocking me slightly off balance – but then his eyes narrowed further as she stood in front of him.

I knew that look. I was actually surprised he didn't growl.

I couldn't see Jessica's face, but I knew she was scared. Or at least unnerved. She stumbled backwards a little, and her entire body tensed, like she was on alert.

I could see then what Edward had been talking about. The sense of self-preservation. The thing I supposedly lacked.

Maybe I did, because I still wasn't afraid. Of course, it wasn't directed at me. Maybe I would have felt differently if it had been.

He side-stepped around her without responding, then his eyes softened as they locked with mine.

"Bella." He said this like a greeting, in a smooth, almost husky voice that made me want to melt. And then he extended his hand to me like an offering.

I accepted.

We were halfway down the hall when I heard Jessica call out, "Well, okay, Bells, I'll see'ya tomorrow!"

Edward did growl then, but it was so quiet, I doubted anyone heard it but me.

It wasn't until we were out of the parking lot that I asked. A part of me didn't want to know, but the curious part of me ruled over it.

"What was she thinking?"

He didn't answer. He just shook his head. So I dropped it.

"I think I need to go to the store," I said, changing the subject. "If I keep spending lunch in the forest, I'm going to starve to death."

Edward tensed. "You have been skipping meals?"

"Well, yeah, but only because Jessica is set to ambush me as soon as I walk into the cafeteria. I can pack a lunch, but I need to buy the stuff to do that."

He made an illegal U-turn, right then and there.

"Wait, Edward, I need to go to my house first. I don't have the money on me. I need to get into the grocery fund—"

"I have money, Bella."

"But it's not your responsibility…" I trailed off when he smirked and scoffed while shaking his head.

I needed to learn to pick my battles, so I dropped that, too.

It was a very domestic outing. An errand Edward seemed out of place participating in. I had to wonder when the last time was that he had even stepped foot inside a grocery store. It wasn't like he had a reason to, what with his dietary needs being what they were.

He pushed the cart behind me, investigated every item I placed in it, poked at the loaf of bread, wrinkled his nose as we passed the butcher counter… he even moved to bag the groceries himself, until the bagboy politely told him: I have it, sir.

And through it all – like earlier, when I had been driving his car – he seemed amused. That was when I realized… my very boring life was actually _fascinating_ to him. I couldn't see how it would be, but maybe that was how he felt about my interest in _his world_.

The realization comforted me. It made me feel like we were a little more equal, at least in that sense. Our worlds were vastly different but similarly intriguing to the other. Yeah, he had been human once, but that was over eight decades ago. Times change, and it seemed as if he hadn't changed much with them. Like he had been playing catch up with the entire world and was continuously falling short of the era he actually lived in. He had picked up some things – enough to get by in the human world undetected, maybe – but not enough to satisfy the curiosity.

There's only so much one can get from books. And, yeah, he could read minds, but that probably only confused him. Like he had said of Jessica, people rarely say what they're thinking. And their actions don't always make sense.

What must it be like to hear every thought, but then witness contradicting comments and actions? The frustration must be maddening.

It wasn't like he could have asked for help. All he could do was watch human behavior from afar and try to emulate what he saw.

Until me.

But I had been so caught up in learning about _him_ – asking question after question in an attempt to understand him better – that he hadn't gotten a chance to understand _me_. Clearly – or at least it was clear to me then, as we left the store and headed for his car – he was as curious about me as I was about him.

"What are you thinking?"

"I'm thinking there's something I'd like to share with you, if you're interested."

"Yes."

There was an eagerness to his tone. I had been right!

He opened my door for me, but before I slipped into my seat, I pulled my cell phone out of my pocket. Ignoring his arched eyebrow – well, I wasn't ignoring it so much as trying not to laugh because of it – I dialed the number I knew by heart and waited for the pick-up.

"Angela, hey. I was wondering, could I borrow your photo printer again? I have a few pics I'd like to put in my scrapbook."

Of course she said yes, but she actually seemed really excited about it, too. It _had_ been a while since we had just hung out.

"Um, Edward is with me. Is that okay?"

She seemed surprised, but excited about that as well.

We said our goodbyes, and only then did I get into the car.

We were both quiet as we drove back to my house to put the groceries away and grab my digital camera. He didn't seem upset, though. I could sense a little tension, but mostly, he just seemed intrigued.

As I went to grab my camera from my room, he put the groceries away. I almost wished I had been there to witness the simple task, because apparently, it wasn't that simple of a task for Edward.

When I entered the kitchen, he was staring at the jar of jam I had just purchased, looking perplexed.

"What's wrong?"

"It says 'refrigerate after opening'. Logic would dictate that one would then wait to place this item into the refrigerator until after doing so, but…"

"But…?" I could _not_ hide my amusement. He scowled.

"Why store it in one location, just to then move it to another later?"

"They stock it on a shelf at the store. They're just letting you know that you can't do that once it's been opened." His scowl grew. "Not everyone uses common sense, Edward. Some people have to be told that it's not safe to make toast while bathing."

I took the jar from him, threw it in the fridge, then took his hand and led him – almost dragged him – towards the door.

This was going to be an interesting afternoon.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

Okay, here's where we stand right now. Thirty-five chapters total for this fic, the thirty-fifth chapter being an epilogue. Couldn't help myself. The ideas bombarding my brain were just too tempting.

My beta-reader was just way too busy, so this chapter is brought to you without a safety net. Hopefully, the mistakes are minimal.

The reviews have been awesome, guys! Thanks so much!

GoldenBeliever: LOL! Awesome! Glad you're enjoying it!

I will be continuing with the Monday-Wednesday-Friday updates. Once I finish the epilogue, I might even up it to more often. We'll see how it goes.

Please, keep the reviews coming! And MTLBYAKY


	14. Chapter 14

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Fourteen

By: Jana~

**XXX**

The closer we got to Angela's house, the more nervous I became. It felt a little like a test of sorts, to get an idea for how things might go on Friday.

"Wear your gloves," I whispered, as we pulled up in front. "She might want to shake your hand."

Wearing gloves wouldn't raise any questions. She would probably just think he was cold, or that he really did have a skin condition. Better that than to have her wonder why his hands were so frigid.

Angela greeted us warmly, but I could tell she was forcing her eyes not to shift over to Edward. She probably thought it would be rude. Like she was staring.

I introduced them, because it was the polite thing to do, and because I wanted to give her relief from the effort. "Angela, this is Edward. Edward, Angela."

She did shake his hand. Good thing I had suggested the gloves.

"It's nice to meet you, Edward."

He repeated her sentence right back to her, using her name instead of his own, very formally.

"Well, come on in! I'm babysitting my little brothers until Mom gets home," she said as she led the way into the house, "so we'll have to stay downstairs. But I have everything set up and ready."

Edward didn't seem tense so much as on alert. Not in a way that indicated danger, but in a way that showed he was out of his element. Much like the way I had been when first arriving at his house five days ago.

Angela gestured for me to hand over my camera, so I did, ever mindful of Edward as he stood in the center of the room and glanced around.

"Which pics do you need printed?" she asked as she pulled the memory card from its slot.

"The last three." Truthfully, I didn't care at all about the first two, but I thought it would be weird if I just asked her to print out the picture of me and Edward that Alice had taken.

She pulled the pictures up on the screen and scrolled through to the last three. Then she gasped.

"Wow, Bella, this is an _amazing_ pic of you!"

I immediately looked to the floor, embarrassed. "Um, yeah. Alice – Edward's sister – she kind of pinned me down and gave me a makeover."

It would have been the perfect opening for anyone else to start fishing for information, but Angela, being who she was, didn't take it. She didn't even look like the idea had crossed her mind.

"This is a great shade of blue on you. New dress?"

"A borrow," I answered.

Just as I had said this, a ball went whizzing by me, straight towards Edward. I followed its path, but couldn't get words out of my mouth fast enough to warn him. It bounced off his head, then went flying off, askew.

He noticed it, of course, but acted like it hadn't affected him directly. Like it was something that had just happened _around_ him.

"Josh! Isaac! That wasn't very nice! You can bounce the ball off each other's heads all you want, but not my friends' heads! And not in the house. If you break another one of Mom's knickknacks, you know you'll get grounded again!"

As Joshua ran up to retrieve their ball – or at least I assumed it was Josh; with them being twins, it was hard to tell sometimes – Angela leaned in to whisper something to me.

I tensed, wondering if she had noticed Edward's odd reaction, but apparently, she hadn't.

"I'd probably get grounded, too." She smirked, and it put me at ease. "Apologize to Edward," she instructed her brothers.

Joshua rolled his eyes a little. "Sorry," he muttered, then off he ran.

"Sorry about that, Edward," Angela said. "They get a little stir crazy sometimes. You can sit if you want. Make yourself comfortable."

He was obviously far from comfortable, but he smiled politely and took a seat on the couch. Then he folded his hands in his lap and just stared off into space.

That time, Angela did notice that something was off.

"We'll make this quick," she whispered. "I think Edward is bored."

I knew he wasn't. He was just uncertain of how to act. Decades of reclusiveness had affected his ability to blend in.

Yeah, Friday could be a problem. No one would be paying attention to him during the movie, but before and after… And if we went to dinner first…

"You can visit," he said.

Angela smiled at him, then at me, then she went back to her task.

"The swim team pic turned out great." She pointed towards it, so I stepped over to get a better look. "Check out Kirk. He knew what the article was about. It's like he's flaunting it."

Suddenly, Edward was behind me, peering over my shoulder.

"Oh, here, Edward," Angela said, snatching the paper that went with the picture from off the computer desk, "this is the article we're talking about. Give it a read. Let me know what you think."

She was trying to include him.

He read it too fast, faster than any human could, but that didn't seem to register with Angela. Probably because she was sidetracked printing out my pictures for me.

"This is good. It is informative and humorous."

"Thanks." She was beaming again, like when I had complimented her earlier at school. "Journalism is kind of my thing. I'm hoping to get into the journalism program at Seattle U after high school."

"You will," I said encouragingly. I believed that, too. She had been the first freshman in the history of Forks High to get on the school paper.

She smiled at me, hopefully, maybe even a little wistfully, then she turned towards Edward again. "Did you want a copy of this last pic, too, Edward? Since you're in it? It's no bother."

"Yes. Thank you."

It was obvious to me that I was going to have to _coach_ Edward before Friday night. Angela was forgiving of people's personality traits – she could tolerate Jessica better than most – but the rest of the kids in our group…

They would think him odd. Dwell on the little things that made Edward unique, and stand out. Maybe even make fun of him.

That thought irritated me, so I moved on.

I could just give him a few pointers. Relax his body a little. Use more slang. Not stare at me so much… like he did for the rest of my visit with Angela.

"Hope that wasn't too miserable for you," I said as we drove back to my house.

"No."

Yeah, I needed to loosen him up a bit before Friday. It's not that I really cared if my friends and somewhat friends _liked_ him, I just didn't want him to be the topic of jokes or more rumors. I guess I felt protective of him, too.

"I know how I want to spend the evening."

He quirked an eyebrow. "I'm listening."

"The trip to Angela's was helpful. It gave me some ideas."

"Such as?"

"This is not an insult," I prefaced, "but… you're too formal. Too stiff. The kids we're going with on Friday, they'll notice. I don't want you to be the butt of jokes, or be the subject of more gossip. I don't want to be the reason why your family is looked at more carefully. They're already a little too curious about you. I don't want you to stand out more than you already do."

"Are you suggesting that you would rather I not accompany you?"

"No!" God, it did sound like that, didn't it? "No, I just… I think I can help. Help you to blend in a little better. When was the last time you've been _out_. You know, in public, mingling with humans?"

"Nineteen-sixty-seven."

Before I was even born. That was a weird thought. "I believe it. And they'll notice it. I'm not trying to change you," I assured him. And I wasn't. He was perfect as far as I was concerned. "But just a few little things here and there might make a difference. If you're willing."

"I am."

I literally sighed with relief. Not because he agreed to let me teach him, but because he wasn't angry at me for offering to.

"Let's start with your speech," I suggested. It was the easiest thing to work on while we were in a car. "You're too formal. Too clipped in your responses. Yes. No. Thank you. Most people don't speak like that. Especially teenagers. It's: yeah. Nah or nope. Thanks. Just a few slang words here and there will make you sound more like a seventeen year old and less like a ninety-something year old. See what I mean?"

"Yeah."

He smirked over at me, and I busted up laughing. He was _enjoying_ this!

"There'ya go! Now, your physical demeanor. Again, too stiff. You look like you're made of rock, and you don't want that. People usually slouch a little. Most people don't care too much about good posture, especially teenagers. Just, relax your body a little."

He did, but he looked a little uncomfortable doing so. Well, it was a start.

"Good. Now, your eyes."

"My eyes?"

"Yeah. They're too intense. Jessica's already noticed, and she isn't known for being very observant of subtle things. That means it's too noticeable. And… well, you stare at me too much." I was reluctant to tell him that. I actually liked it when he stared at me.

"Does it bother you?"

"No. Not at all. But the others, they'll think it's… odd."

"You hesitated."

He caught that. I was about to say 'creepy', but had changed my mind. It sounded too insulting.

It wasn't. It wasn't creepy. Sure, that first night at his house, when we both weren't watching the TV, and I sensed that he was staring at me, I had been a little unnerved. But that was before we had said more than a few words to each other. After that, even before I learned his secret, I had just accepted that it was a part of who he was. From pretty early on, I had actually found it endearing. Flattering.

"I was just trying to find the right word. When we're alone, you can stare at me for days on end. But on Friday… look around more. Look at other people."

God, I sounded like I was harping. He shouldn't have to change, and I didn't want him to. Maybe it was a bad idea, trying to include him in my world. A world stuffed to the guild with narrow minded people.

"Sorry." I was, too. I almost wished I hadn't brought it up. "I was just trying to be helpful."

"I know. Thanks."

I looked up at him as the slang word slipped so easily off his tongue. He was grinning. Then he offered me his hand. And of course, I took it.

"It just started sounding a bit like I _was_ trying to change you," I said, explaining my apology. "I don't want you to change. I like you just the way you are, Edward. I mean that."

When he gave mine a little squeeze, like he was thanking me for my words, I brought our clasped hands up to my face and pressed the back of his to my cheek.

I was becoming quite fond of the electricity that always seemed to flow through us during moments of physical contact. But as I caressed his cold skin in a nuzzling manner, something shifted.

There was a pull in my stomach, a warmth spread through me, a need so strong that I held his hand against my cheek for the remainder of the car ride home. It wasn't until Edward called my name, that I realized we had actually arrived.

"Sorry," I muttered, suddenly embarrassed.

He smiled, but I could only see that he had out of my peripheral vision, because I was staring at my lap by that point. And then he left the car and rounded it to my side. He opened my door and helped me out, but he didn't move so that we could walk towards and enter the house. Instead, he hovered in such a way that I felt I was almost pinned to the car behind me, even though our bodies weren't touching.

My stomach pulled harder and the warmth intensified. And then every inch of my skin burst into flames.

He raked his hand into my hair, starting at the temple, and then he just held it there, his thumb brushing my cheek as he stared deep into my soul.

I felt myself being lured that time. Knowledge is like that. It makes you more aware.

The world stopped spinning. Life in every embodiment froze. The only things left in existence were me and Edward, and this overwhelming urge to kiss him.

I slid my hands up his chest until my arms wrapped around his neck, and then I pulled myself into him.

But then suddenly, the world jolted, and life around us thawed.

Taking my arms at the wrists, gently, he removed them from their position and dropped them to our sides. It felt like my body had taken a physical blow. Loss, pain, emptiness, rejection, embarrassment, all rolled up into one emotion that didn't have its own name.

His eyes softened as an unnamable expression – which was caused by the unnamable emotion I was feeling – settled onto my face. I felt him release one of my wrists, and then he placed his hand over my heart.

The relief was so abrupt it was almost jarring. Don't ask me how I knew, but somehow, I just did. I could read it in his stare. Feel it in his touch.

He wasn't saying 'no', he was saying 'not yet'.

"You need to eat now, Bella." The reverence on my name made me feel even more at ease. "I will call Esme."

Hearing Alice at the door when she brought the meal made me realize how much I had missed her. It was strange how close I felt to this family within such a short period of time.

She didn't feel she was strong enough to be near me until after my _condition_ had passed, so she called out to me from the front steps.

"Miss you, Bella! I'll see you soon! Wednesday!"

She missed me, too, apparently. But before I could even open my mouth to respond, she was gone, and Edward was standing in my kitchen with a plate of food. God, it smelled good. Skipping lunch obviously affected me more than I had thought.

"Mediterranean eggplant with wild rice. Esme hopes you enjoy it."

I was sure I would. And I did. I ate every last morsel on the plate, and near about licked it after I had. That amused Edward greatly.

After cleaning up after myself – I was gaining quite the collection of Esme's plates in my dish drainer – we went up to my room. I showered right away, wanting to get it over and done with. Then we just sat – him in the chair by the window, me on my bed – and talked for hours.

I shared every little boring, semi-significant moment of my life. I had been right… it didn't take long. I told him about every broken bone. Every trip to the hospital. Every serious scrape and bruise. The ones that weren't so serious remained unmentioned, of which there were probably millions.

I told him about my very unsuccessful attempt at playing softball when I was nine. They asked me to leave the team when I almost killed a girl. It was an accident, of course. The bat slipped out of my hand. But it was the straw that broke the camel's back, as the saying goes. Before that, I had pegged four girls while trying to be a pitcher, tripped two when I tried to play first base, and knocked the umpire off his feet when I tried to be a catcher. The ball went astray, and in my clumsy attempt to save it, I stumbled right into him.

Yeah, sports are like dancing… not a good thing for me.

Bedtime happened in much the same way as it had the night before.

Edward tucked me in, then sat beside me until I finally fell asleep. Just having him near, I felt safe and protected in a way I had never felt before. It's not that I didn't feel safe with my parents – nobody messed with the police chief's daughter – but this seemed to be on a whole new level. It was so comforting, it seemed I was asleep within moments of when my head hit the pillow.

My dreams had been pleasant ones. Very pleasant. Starring Edward, and the kiss I had been denied the day before. I was grateful, as I awoke to the feeling of him brushing my hair from my face, that he couldn't read my mind. Could someone who reads minds also read dreams? They're kind of like thoughts. Subconscious ones, yeah, but still.

"Can you read dreams?" I asked him, as I started to pull myself into reality.

"Yours? No."

"Anyone's?"

"Yes. What do you dream about? You were enjoying the one you had last night."

My cheeks flushed instantly. My heart rate accelerated. I knew he could hear it.

"Nothing all that interesting, usually." That wasn't a lie. Usually, my dreams _weren't_ interesting. Last night had been an exception.

"You said my name."

Oh, God. Has anyone ever actually died of embarrassment? If not, I was about to be the first.

"Interesting," I muttered, then I grabbed my blankets and threw them over my head, hiding myself from him.

That would have been the perfect time for a natural disaster to strike. Not one that killed or hurt anyone, but something that could have taken the attention away from me.

But, of course, I wasn't that lucky.

No, instead, my luck went in the other direction. My cell phone started ringing, forcing me to leave my cocoon of semi-safety to answer it.

I tried to avoid Edward's eyes, but a brief glance happened anyway. He was smirking. He knew.

I didn't even look to see who was calling me. Whoever it was, they would be my diversion for as long as I could manage to keep them talking.

"Hello?"

"Baby, hi!"

Mom. Good. Okay, I could buy myself a few minutes, talking to Mom.

"Hey, Mom, what's up?"

I barely listened to her babblings. Not only because I was still irritated over what she was planning to do, but because I was too aware of Edward, sitting on the bed beside me, looking a little too pleased.

"Bella? You still there?"

"Um, yeah, sorry, zoned out there for a sec."

"I asked if you were nervous about the state testing today."

"Not really. I'll be glad when it's over though, so classes can get back to normal. We're doing a celebratory thing on Friday. We're all going out to eat, and then to the show. That's okay, right?"

"Sure it is. Who's driving?"

Saying his name had never been so difficult. "Edward."

"Ah! So you two _are_ getting along."

Her knowing, singsong voice made me blush deeper, if that were even possible.

"Yeah, we're getting along," I said, trying to force a normal tone. I failed. Edward's smirk grew.

Okay, talking to my mom was not the diversion I had been hoping for. It was making things worse.

"Look, Mom, I have to get ready for school now. I'll talk to you later, okay?"

The moment she said okay, I disconnected the call, cutting off the rest of whatever she had been planning on saying. I would have to apologize later.

I fully expected an interrogation. I expected he would ask me again about my dream, and not let me dodge the question. But he surprised me. Again.

"Your breakfast will be waiting for you."

My breath caught as he leaned into me, almost hovering over me, then released in a shuddery exhale as his lips touched my forehead. He lingered there for a moment only, and then he was gone.

I stared at my ceiling for eleven years after that. I heard Alice come and go with my breakfast, and still I stared. I almost couldn't move. And I didn't want to move. I didn't want to break my concentration by doing so.

When I concentrated, I could still feel his lips on me. That alone was enough to keep me in my bed a little longer. But it had also triggered a memory. A hazy one, not at all fully formed, but insistent.

It took me all of those eleven years of lying there for it to finally hit me. Friday night, after our long staring session, when I was so sleepy I couldn't manage to keep my eyes open, or comprehend anything going on around me…

He had kissed my forehead before tucking me into bed.

It's a humbling experience to realize how much another being truly loves you, even if you love them back in exactly the same way.

"Bella? Your breakfast is here, and you are not yet dressed."

I blinked several times, then turned my head only to see Edward standing in my bedroom doorway. He smirked at me, his eyebrow quirked, and it was then that it dawned on me…

I was wearing the goofiest smile in the whole wide world. I tried to force it off my face, but a hint of it remained. I just couldn't get it to leave.

"What are you thinking?"

I wasn't even embarrassed, but I wasn't about to tell him, either.

"Good things. I'll be right down."

He gave a subtle nod, then left.

I got ready as quickly as I could, then ran down the stairs into the kitchen. This time, he was sitting at the table, across from where I usually sat. My breakfast was waiting for me.

I took my seat, then immediately started shoveling.

"It doesn't seem to be as difficult for you now," I mentioned between bites. "Being near me, I mean."

"Acclimation."

Ah. The longer he was around me, the less he noticed it. Like when you're in the hospital, and the smell of _clean_ almost burns your nose at first, but after a while, you become less and less aware of it.

I gave a nod, then crammed another spoonful of oatmeal into my mouth. It was the simplest meal Esme had made me so far, but even then it wasn't so simple. It seemed to be sweetened with honey, and it had raisins, dried cranberries, and almond slivers in it. And, of course, it was the perfect consistency. I would never be able to eat packaged oatmeal again.

"Can I drive your car again this morning?" I asked.

He smirked, then nodded. "Would you like me to buy you one?"

I almost dropped my spoon. "What? No! That's _way_ too much money!"

He scowled a little. "Money means nothing. Your happiness and safety means everything."

What does one say in response to something like that? I took another bite of my breakfast, stalling for a reply.

"Thank you," I finally said, "but it wouldn't feel right to me. Besides," I added, "my dad wouldn't like that too much. He would think it was weird." Like Edward was trying to _buy_ my love. I left that unsaid, though.

His scowl deepened. "Would he think it… _weird_… if I were to help you repair your truck?"

I had to think about that for a second. "Maybe a little, but if it meant my safety, he would probably be okay with that."

"I will ask Emmett, after I take you to school this morning. He is an excellent mechanic."

"Oh, Emmett would be fixing it?" I asked. That was different. "My dad wouldn't have a problem with that, then. He would just see it as being neighborly. Jacob works on it all the time."

His eyes tightened. "Jacob?"

There was a deep-seated tension in the way Edward had said his name. Jealousy, maybe? He didn't need to be jealous. Jacob was like a brother to me, and I wasn't keen on incest.

"Yeah, Jacob Black. We've been friends since we were toddlers. He lives down on the reservation."

His tension just seemed to grow. Maybe he didn't get what I meant.

"He's like a brother to me," I added, trying to make it clear to him that he had no reason to be concerned. I had just never felt anything romantic towards Jake, ever. Though I suspected he had a bit of a crush on _me_.

He relaxed a little, but I could tell that something was still bothering him.

"Interesting," he said, then he glanced down at my bowl of perfect oatmeal.

Yeah, I did need to hurry, or I was going to be late. The school was less tolerant of that during state testing.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

Okay, once again, this chapter is being brought to you without a safety net, so I hope the mistakes are minimal. My beta-reader has just been really busy.

She has a life, and she's writing her own fic right now. You should check it out! The fic is: 'You Found Me', and she goes by the penname: Kristylized.

She also made me an awesome banner pic for this story, which can be seen on my personal website, and on the popular Twilight fanfiction site, Twilighted.

In the next chapter, Jacob makes an appearance.

The epilogue chapter is coming along great! I'm really enjoying writing it! I'd been itching to do a particular scene for a while now, and I finally got to! I think it turned out pretty great. We'll see what you all think when we get to the end of this journey.

GoldenBeliever: I know, right? Confused Edward is a blast to write! Thanks for the continued support!

As always, I ask that you please review. To those who have, thank you!

MTLBYAKY


	15. Chapter 15

**Two Weeks**

ChapterFifteen

By: Jana~

**XXX**

Jessica was watching for us again, but not in her usual location. She was back by the steps, almost shrinking herself as if she was trying to hide amongst the other students.

Yeah, she shouldn't ever go into the field of espionage. She sucked at spying.

I got out from behind the wheel, and just as he had yesterday, Edward was waiting for me on the sidewalk.

He gave me a little smile, and then he wrapped his arms around me. I melted against him, taking in shuddery breaths as I reminded myself to oxygenate my lungs. I was really beginning to crave the dizzying effect he had on me. He was like my own personal brand of heroin, and I was hooked.

"Don't go to the forest today," he whispered.

What? Why? I tried to pull back to look at him, but he held me firmly to him, effortlessly.

"She plans on following you. Go to the cafeteria. I will meet you there."

He loosened his hold on me then.

When I looked up at him, I was met by the sweetest of smiles. It dissolved my concerns instantly. And then he did that thing again, where he slipped his hand into my hair and brushed my cheek with his thumb.

Drug Edward coursed through my veins anew.

I felt the loss of contact before I even realized he was walking away. I had been too caught up in my lala land of bliss.

It wasn't until I felt a nudge that I snapped out of it. There was Angela, smiling over at me.

"He likes you. You can tell."

From her, the comment didn't bother me. I smiled back.

"I like him, too," I admitted. It felt nice to acknowledge that to someone other than to myself.

"I'm so glad he decided to come with us on Friday. He seems so shy."

Shy! Sure! That's what it would seem like to others.

"Yeah, he kinda is." She wouldn't spread that rumor, though. She was too kind for that. But Jessica on the other hand…

We started walking towards our first period class, and as we passed Jessica – she was still trying to hide herself amongst others lingering about – I said, "Yeah, he's shy, but he's looking forward to Friday, too, I think."

That would get the news circulating. Hopefully, she wouldn't warp that tiny bit of gossip to make it juicier. She tended to do that.

Guilt soared as I gave that thought. Maybe I should have just kept my big mouth shut.

The schedule on state testing days was weird. You stayed in your first period class for the length of three periods, then you went to lunch, then you attended your last three periods like normal. The second day of testing, it flipped. You went to your first three periods like normal, then after lunch, you stayed in your fourth period class for the duration of three periods.

It was annoying. You never realize how grateful you are for the change of scenery, and for the chance to stretch your legs, until you're stuck in the same room, in the same chair, for hours on end. They allowed you a fifteen minute bathroom break, but with the lines being as long as they were, it was almost better to hold it. Which I did. I just sat in my chair and stared off into the nothingness in front of me, deep in thought.

Edward had said that he would meet me in the cafeteria. There would be restrictions for what we could do while surrounded by the rest of the school, but the idea of it still thrilled me. Any chance to see him in any surroundings thrilled me.

Others would undoubtedly stare at us – Jessica specifically – but I couldn't bring myself to care. It was like when, as a child, your parents went to your school for open house. The excitement of sharing _that world_ with them. That was what it felt like for me. I was about to share another piece of _my world_ with him.

When I entered the cafeteria, I immediately began scanning for him. Edward. I knew he was there. It was like I could sense his presence.

Finally, my eyes landed upon him. He was saving a table towards the back, near the last window in the row of them, watching me. He smiled, and I could feel my legs threaten to buckle just a little.

I started moving towards him, but then Jessica's voice broke into my concentrated strides.

"Bells!"

I stumbled to a stop, then shifted my eyes around the room until I found her. She smiled at me like I was her bestest friend in the world, and then she pushed the chair next to her out in an invitation for me to join her.

Maybe she hadn't seen Edward? Maybe she didn't know he was there? Seemed unlikely, but before I could puzzle through it further, I felt a pair of hands on my shoulders.

Edward. He turned me slightly away from where Jessica still sat, guiding me to the table he had saved for us. I could just make out Jessica scowling as I turned away.

"Her thoughts are very ugly right now," he whispered as he leaned into me just a little. "Ignore her."

He held my chair out for me, and I sat. In front of me, was a beautiful lunch, compliments of Esme.

"She hopes you enjoy it," he said, his smile growing.

My smile matched his. "She knows I will."

It was similar to the sandwich she had made for me on Saturday, but with a hint of Mediterranean influence. Something in the mayonnaise. No fries, but with fruit, still with the grapes cut in half. That time, I did laugh.

"Your mom doesn't need to cut the grapes. They're bite size as they are."

He just smiled back at me. It was then that I noticed… he was wearing a name sticker. At the top, 'Edward Cullen', below that, 'Bella Swan', in the bottom left hand corner, 'Lunch Period'. Don't ask me why, but I found that to be adorable.

"Hey, guys, sorry to interrupt."

It was Angela, so I didn't mind the interruption.

"Just hammering out the final details for Friday. Diner at five, as always, but I'm taking movie requests. Majority rules. Romantic comedy, or zombie flick?"

Zombie flick? Um, no. "I vote romantic comedy."

Edward's eyes never left mine. "Romantic comedy," he repeated.

"Yeah, that's where everyone seems to be leaning. Except for Mike and Tyler," she added with a laugh. "Okay, carpools. You got a ride, right?" she asked, then I saw her eyes flicker just slightly in Edward's direction.

"Yeah, I got it covered," I answered.

"Okay, great! I'll let you guys finish your lunch in peace." Then she looked over at Edward. "It was nice to see you again, Edward."

His eyes finally left mine. He looked Angela straight into hers, smiled, and then very casually said, "Thanks. Nice to see you again, too."

It was perfect. Still Edward, but very seventeen-ish. I nodded my approval after Angela walked away.

"I like Angela. Her thoughts are very kind. She's happy for you."

"She thinks you're shy," I mentioned, then took another bite of my sandwich.

"Yes. I know. Jessica thinks this as well. She overheard you."

"I meant for her to," I admitted. "I thought it might help on Friday."

"Friday will not be a problem, Bella. Alice has seen this."

That made me feel a lot better. I scarfed my sandwich, then moved on to my fruit, all while Edward watched.

"What do you know of Jacob Black's tribe?"

That was random. Was he still worried about him? Did he see him as competition?

"Not much. He told me once they were descended from wolves, but then he laughed it off. He likes messing with me. Usually, when we hang out, we just talk about music, or cars and motorcycles. He's restoring some ancient piece of crap right now."

His eyes turned serious. I had been hoping to ease his concerns, but apparently, my benign account of my friendship with Jacob didn't help at all.

"What is it?" I asked. "What's wrong?"

He didn't answer. Instead, he asked, "May I ask for a favor?"

"Sure." The curiosity was almost suffocating.

"Limit your association with Jacob."

Was he really that jealous, that he didn't even want me to spend time with him? "Edward, you have no reason to be jealous."

"I'm not jealous. I'm concerned."

"Why? Jacob would never hurt me." I was sure of that. He was almost childlike at times.

"Please?" was all he said in response.

I didn't know what to say. I'd known Jake for a million years. I didn't want to just cut him out of my life. But the concern on Edward's face was indisputable.

"Define 'limit'," I said.

"Don't be alone with him."

So he _was_ jealous. "Nothing's going to happen between me and Jake, Edward. Relax, okay?"

He sighed heavily, his scowl growing as he dropped his gaze to the tabletop.

"If you would just tell me what the problem is, maybe I could help ease your mind a little."

He shook his head, in that almost imperceptible way he was capable of, and then he shifted his stare to my fruit before looking up at me.

I smiled as I rolled my eyes. It was comforting the way he looked out for me. How protective he was of me, on every level. My parents didn't care what I ate. I could have had an eating disorder, for all they knew.

I often ate in my room, since the atmosphere at the dinner table was usually stifling. How would they know if I'd actually eaten? I could have flushed it down the toilet. They never asked. Never asked if it was good, or if I'd had enough. They were always too busy trying to get through their own meals in uncomfortable silence.

"Will it be safe to go back to the forest tomorrow?" I asked as I finished the last of the grapes, the last of my lunch.

"No."

I felt my stomach twitch with disappointment. "But, if you can't be… _out_ tomorrow…"

"I know," he whispered.

"Will you at least call me? Or text me?"

The sadness in his eyes lifted a little. "Yes."

When the bell rang, signifying the end of lunch, Edward took my plate and bowl – the same kinds that had been amassing in my dish drainer at home – and placed them on top of the stack of trays.

"Won't Esme—?"

"No."

I almost laughed, wondering what the cafeteria staff would think when they came out to collect the trays, and saw dishes of fine china and crystal sitting there.

He walked me to my class, holding my hand, which allowed me to soak up every last ounce of him I could before dealing with the mundane again. At least the last three periods were 'normal periods'. I wouldn't have to worry about testing again until tomorrow.

Jessica stalked us the entire time, but I only knew she was because I heard Edward growl ever so quietly.

I thought he would leave me at the door, but, nope. He walked me straight to my desk, giving Mr. Molina a polite nod as we walked by him, then he held my chair out for me.

The entire class became deathly silent. It was never that quiet, even when the teacher was talking and demanded our attention. Everyone was staring.

"May I help you?" Mr. Molina asked. He didn't sound upset. He just seemed confused.

"No, sir. I apologize, but I was just seeing Bella to her seat."

His eyes lingered on mine for several long seconds. I briefly considered that he would kiss my knuckles again, because my hand was still in his, but he didn't. Maybe he sensed it would have embarrassed me. I would have lived through it, though.

He shifted his eyes over to Mike for just the flash of a second, a slight glare present, and then he calmly walked out of the classroom.

Everyone started murmuring after that.

"Dude is intense," Mike muttered as he finally sat. "Guess it's a chick flick on Friday. Tyler and I were outvoted. We need more guys in our group," he added with a sigh.

"Edward voted for a chick flick," I mentioned. Then I wondered why I had.

He seemed surprised. "Intense and weird," he said, adding to his previous assessment.

I almost growled. Edward was rubbing off on me. "A lot of guys like romantic comedies. Doesn't make them weird."

Mike shrugged. "Just sayin'."

Then the bell rang, and Mike left me alone.

I was able to get out of Gym again. Barely. The coach's eyes narrowed on me suspiciously when I asked to sit out. Jessica didn't glare at me once… that I saw.

English was tolerable. A light lesson, no homework. There never was during the week of state testing.

And just like the day before, right before the final dismissal bell was set to ring, I saw Edward, standing outside the classroom, feet from the door. It made the seconds drag on like minutes.

But unlike the day before, instead of waiting for me to exit the classroom, as soon as the bell rang, he walked in and straight to me.

Like in Biology, everyone froze. You could have heard a pin drop in the silence.

He reached for my backpack, slung it onto his shoulder, and then offered me his hand. Nobody else mattered in that moment. The whole world could have been staring at us, for all I cared.

We were almost to the door that led to the outside, at the end of the hall, when we spotted Jessica, watching us from just inside a classroom that wasn't hers.

"Ignore her," he whispered as we passed by.

I did. I kept my eyes forward and matched his stride.

"She's not going to stop, is she?" I asked, once we were out of the building.

"No. Not for a while."

"I don't get why she cares so much." It seemed to extend beyond her need for gossip.

"She cares for malicious reasons. You needn't be concerned."

Those seemed like contradicting sentences, but I let it drop. Mostly because I didn't even want to think about what her reasons could be. But then, as we arrived at his car, instead of opening the passenger door for me, he opened the driver's door. That shot any curiosity about it straight out of my head.

He was letting me drive home!

I'm seriously not a materialistic person, but I can still appreciate nice things when I see them. Or drive them.

He grinned as I hopped over and slid into the seat.

"Say the word, and I will buy you—"

I didn't even let him finish. "We've been through this, Edward. I could never accept such an extravagant gift. Just you letting me drive yours is gift enough."

He nodded, but waited to respond until he had gotten into the passenger seat. "Then you may do so any time you wish."

The open-ended invitation made me smile.

"Do not be alarmed when we arrive at your house," he said as we pulled out of the parking lot. "Your truck is at my house. Emmett is working on it."

Good thing he said something. I might have had a moment of concern, thinking it had been stolen.

We were a minute from the house – the drive had been a pleasant one, which made it all the weirder – when Edward stiffened.

"What's wrong?" I asked. I slowed down reflexively.

"Complication. Please forgive me for what's about to happen."

My heart lurched. "What's about to happen?" I asked. And then I saw him.

Jacob was standing where my truck usually sat, his arms crossed, looking… well, angry. But why?

I parked, cut the engine, and then was out of the vehicle before Edward even had the chance to open his door.

"Jake! Hey! What's up?"

His eyes softened a little, but not by much.

"_Your_ dad asked _my_ dad to check on the house. But when I got here, I saw that your truck was gone."

Oh, he thought it had been stolen!

"Oh, no, it's fine, Jake. Edward's brother is just making a few repairs on it for me."

His eyes shifted past mine. I could sense Edward behind me, and just knew that was where Jacob was looking. Glaring, actually. When I turned towards Edward, he was glaring, too.

They seemed like mortal enemies!

"Whoa! Guys! What's going on?"

"You shouldn't be friends with him, Bella. I told my dad this was a mistake! You should have just stayed with _us_! But it was farther to school. And then Dr. _Cullen_ offered…"

He said their name with such disdain. Who could possibly hate Dr. Cullen?

"What has gotten into you, Jake? Seriously! I can be friends with whoever I want to be friends with!"

"He's not _safe_, Bella. You don't know…"

He stopped himself, and then he just looked lost. What didn't I know? What did _he_ know? Did he know Edward was a vampire? That all the Cullens were?

"He's perfectly safe, Jake. The Cullens have been very hospitable."

His glare returned. "Then why are you _here_ instead of over _there_?"

Before I could even think of a lie, Edward spoke up.

"My brother is ill. We didn't want her to catch it."

Jacob scoffed. "Yeah, ill. There's a word for it!"

Okay, what did he know? It wasn't like I could ask him!

"What would _you_ call the flu?" I asked, playing along with Edward's excuse. It wasn't a lie. It was a question.

"Bella, please, you should just come home with me, okay? Or send _him_ away and _I'll_ stay with you."

"Jake, you're being ridiculous. You're younger than _I_ am! And there's no need to change up the arrangements. I'm going back over there tomorrow, anyway. Dr. Cullen says Jasper won't be contagious anymore by then."

Wow, that was the fastest I had ever thought up a lie. Probably because I rarely lied.

"This is a mistake. I can't leave you like this. With _him_."

He seemed genuinely tortured by the mere thought of it.

"What do you think is going to happen?" Edward asked. Calmly. But I could hear the slight edge to his tone. I wondered if Jake could.

"You know damn good and well what I think, _Cullen_."

Whoa! Okay, so, he knew Edward could read minds?

"You know I would never," Edward said.

"No, I _don't_ know that!" Jake was absolutely furious, but then he looked to me, and he seemed like a lost little boy again. "Bella, I can't explain it to you. I'm asking you to trust me. I'm asking you to come home with me. Now. Please."

"I'm sorry, Jake, but no."

"Bella—"

"She gave you her answer," Edward interrupted. "I think you should leave now."

"You stay out of this!" Jake shouted, and then Edward growled.

It was about to get ugly. I stood between them, hands out to both of them to stop whatever was about to happen.

"Stop! I mean it! Jake, go home," I said to him, firmly. "Whatever you think the problem is here, you're wrong. Just… go home."

Jacob sighed, and slumped a little, defeated. "Fine. But I'm calling you later, to make sure you're _okay_."

When he had said the word 'okay', he emphasized it, while staring straight at Edward.

He then jumped on his bike – the one he had been restoring – and took off. Fast. I was surprised the thing could even run, let alone speed.

"What the hell?" I asked Edward. The adrenalin was hurting, it was so extreme.

"In the house," he whispered, then he shifted his eyes to his left.

Our neighbors were outside, watching.

I followed him in, slammed the door, then repeated my earlier question. "What the hell, Edward?"

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

The reviews have been very encouraging. Thank you! I'm glad people are enjoying this.

Once again, this chapter is brought to you without a safety net. And once again, I hope the mistakes are minimal.

I'm _still_ working on the epilogue. Here's the problem… it's starting to run _**long**_. If I keep going, at this rate, it will be about the size of two and a half to three chapters. And I'm stuck on a scene I was initially excited to do, but finding difficult to execute now that I'm there. It's very frustrating.

So, let me just ask… I could back up and cut it in a particular spot, which would make the size of the chapter just a bit longer than a typical one within this story. It's a good place to stop it, but a lot of really cool stuff would get lost if I do that.

So, the question is – and I know it's early on in the fic for you all, but – would you be interested in or annoyed by reading a very long epilogue chapter? 'Cause if people are just going to be annoyed by its length, I'll back up, cut it off, and stop trying to write this one scene.

Your call, guys. Let me know.

As always, please review, and MTLBYAKY


	16. Chapter 16

**Two Weeks**

ChapterSixteen

By: Jana~

**XXX**

"Bella, I'm sorry."

I scoffed. I didn't want apologies. I wanted answers.

"Apology accepted, now answer my question. What was that?"

"It was what it was."

Yeah, no, vague answers like that weren't going to fly.

"He knows, doesn't he? That you're…" I lowered my voice. "A vampire."

"Yes."

"How?"

"The story he told you – the story he laughed off and you dismissed…" He stared back at me pointedly.

Wait. No. What the—? "You're not serious," I said.

"We are bound by a treaty. If we don't hunt humans, our secret is safe."

"So that's why he couldn't just tell me why he was freaking out. Because the treaty binds him to keep the secret?"

"Yes."

That part made sense, but something else didn't. "What does that have to do with the wolf story Jake told me?" He conveyed the answer with his eyes alone. "No. That's…" I wanted to say 'ridiculous', but if someone had told me a week ago that I would be consorting with actual honest-to-God vampires, I would have said the same thing. Yet, here I was. "Jake is a wolf?" I asked instead.

"No. Not yet. Possibly later."

"Does he know that?" If he did, why didn't he ever tell me?

"No. He thinks the stories are just that. Legends. He is in denial."

Oh. That was why he had never said anything beyond that one joking comment. Or maybe he wouldn't have even if he had believed it. That would be a weird conversation. 'Just so you know, I can turn into a wolf.'

I think that was how the story he told me went. Phase into a wolf, I think he called it.

In six days time, all I thought I knew about mythical creatures had been turned upside down. "Just answer me this one last question," I said. He quirked an eyebrow. "Is the Boogie Man real?"

I was joking, of course, but, then again, maybe he _was_. But then Edward grinned. I matched it.

"'Kay. Just checking."

It took a little time to feel normal again after that revelation. I wasn't freaked out, but it was just such a weird thought. Jacob, the wolf. I wondered if he would tell me when it happened. _If_ it happened. Edward had said 'possibly later'. Maybe it would never happen to him.

I couldn't very well talk to him about it. Warn him. Even if I did, he probably wouldn't believe me, either. Especially if he learned that I had heard it from Edward. He really, _really_ didn't like Edward.

I had to wonder how much of that was a vampire thing, and how much was a jealousy thing.

"What are you thinking?"

I looked away from my book, but didn't meet Edward's eyes. "I'm reading," I answered.

"You stopped reading a while ago."

And he calls _me_ amazingly perceptive.

"I just found out that _little Jake_ is a wolf. What do you think I'm thinking about?"

"He's not. He has the potential to become one."

"Is that the reason you asked me for that favor?"

"Yes."

"I don't think he would hurt me, even if he was a wolf."

He laughed. "Yes, Bella, you would think that, but that is because you have a flawed sense of self-preservation."

I rolled my eyes and went back to my book. I tried to read it, but really, I was just staring at the page.

He left his chair by the window – I knew he had because I heard it squeak – and then I felt his weight on the bed beside me. I still just stared at the page, pretending to read it.

He laughed again, then pulled the book from my hands. "Since you are no longer interested in reading, would you care to take a walk with me?"

Before he had even started to ask me, all humor had left his tone. It was soft. Husky. Mesmerizing. I was instantly struck stupid again. I loved being _lured_.

He _lured_ me into the forest, but I scarcely remembered how we got there. We were a fair ways in before I was able to engage in intelligent conversation.

"I don't think I have a flawed sense of self-preservation," I said, weakly defensive. "I have enough sense to get out of the way of an oncoming car. I have enough sense to avoid dark alleys at night."

"One is an obvious danger, one is a preventative measure. The problem lies with your perception of what is dangerous."

That made sense. I continued to drive my truck each day, even though it was two steps from total collapse. I never perceived it to be dangerous. I just assumed that, when it finally _did_ break down, I would fix it or beg my parents for a new car. Well, new to me. They could never afford a _new_ car.

"Maybe," I muttered.

"Definitely. You're walking through a forest, alone with a vampire. Willingly."

"I know you would never hurt me," I countered.

"I would not, but the potential is there, yet you have no sense of fear."

"If it makes you feel any better, I wouldn't walk through the forest with any vampire that wasn't a member of your family."

That struck a nerve. He stopped walking and spun me around to face him. "I would never let another vampire, who wasn't a member of my family, within one hundred miles of you. Ever."

He looked absolutely feral. Like he was ready to start killing vampires at random, just on the off chance they'd be stopping by in Forks.

"Edward?" I whispered his name, then placed my hand on his cheek, hoping to calm him. It worked.

His eyes flashed and his expression changed. To remorse.

"I'm sorry if I frightened you."

"You didn't," I assured him. "I'm sorry if _I_ frightened _you_."

And that's really what it looked like. Just the mere mention of other vampires had him completely terrified.

"I could never bear to lose you, Bella."

Yeah, he was terrified.

"You won't lose me. Vampires don't make regular stops here." His return expression made me question that statement. "Do they?"

He looked anguished then. He removed my hand from his face, continued to hold it like he had been the other, and then slowly lowered himself to the ground. I followed.

"They have been here before. Three of them. Nomads. We ran them off."

My heart lurched in my chest. "When?"

He stared back at me for the longest time. I had started to wonder if he was ever going to answer me. His expression was that of agony, like he wanted nothing more than to _not_ tell me. So I asked again.

"When, Edward?"

"One week ago."

The math jumped into my head like a two-by-four had just struck me. "Waylon?" It didn't even come out as a whisper. It was a choked, inaudible mouthing of his name.

I knew the answer before he even nodded. I could see it in his eyes.

"I'm so sorry. We stopped them before they could strike again. They won't be back."

I couldn't even cry. I was too shocked. My dad's best friend had been murdered by a vampire. A believed-to-be mythical being like the one I was staring at.

It was the first time since knowing Edward's secret, that I really understood the _bad_ he had been referring to. He was unique. His whole family was. But there were others who weren't. They didn't fight their instincts. And they weren't an abstract concept anymore.

They were real. Too real. Frightening real.

"Are you afraid?"

I answered without thinking. "Yes."

He pulled his hands away from mine, so fast that he almost dragged me along with the momentum of it. The loss of contact was especially devastating right then.

"Not of you," I whispered, as I climbed into his lap. I needed to be close to him right then. I needed to feel protected.

"They won't be back. You're safe. I won't let anything happen to you."

"But at some point, others might show up." I wasn't asking him. I knew it was at least possible.

"Yes. And we will deal with them in the same way. Territories are observed amongst our kind. This is _our_ territory. The nomads didn't know that. They do now."

Fat lot of good that did Waylon. What if it had been my dad? Or my mom? What if my parents had been next on their list? What if the Cullens hadn't stopped them in time?

I started to shake from the possibilities.

"I should not have told you."

Maybe he was right. Maybe I should have remained wrapped in my ignorant bliss. I couldn't tell him that, though. I could tell by his tone that he was guilt-ridden about it.

"I'm fine," I lied. "Just… give me some time to process it."

"I'm taking you home now. Hold on, and close your eyes."

I did, and then it felt like it was seconds later and we were at the forest's edge near my house.

"Can you walk from here?"

I nodded, though I wasn't one hundred percent sure if I could. I felt wobbly. Unstable.

He set me onto my feet, then wrapped his arm around my waist and helped me into the house. As soon as he kicked the door closed, he scooped me back into his arms and, whoosh, we were in my room, and he was setting me on my bed.

He immediately fished his cell from his pocket, dialed a number so fast it sounded like one long beeping sound instead of seven distinct ones, and then I heard him speak in the rapid wind-like way he was capable of.

I didn't question who he was calling. I just pulled my pillow to my body and my knees to my chest.

And then I lost track of time.

"I should not have told her. I think she's in shock."

"Don't punish yourself, son. She would have figured it out eventually. She is, as you say, amazingly perceptive."

I had been staring at the wall, but all of the sudden, my line of sight was broken.

"Bella? Can you hear me?"

Well, yeah. I wasn't deaf. "Yes."

"Edward is worried about you."

"I know."

"Can you sit up for me?"

I didn't want to, but I could, so I did. Then I locked eyes with Dr. Cullen. "I'm okay. Just… shocked, I guess."

"I'm very sorry. I know how hard that must have been for you to hear."

Yeah, something like that. "I just keep thinking… what if it had been my dad? Or my mom? What if you hadn't stopped them? Whose loved one are they killing now?"

"Yes, I know. It's hard to think about. It's best if you don't."

How could I _not_?

"Dwelling on it won't change anything," he added.

No, true, but…

"Did he suffer? Waylon?"

Edward and Dr. Cullen shared looks. Edward winced slightly. That was a yes.

"I don't know."

That was a lie.

"You don't have to lie to me."

"The truth can be hard to hear," he said.

"I want to know." And yet I didn't.

"He knew it was coming, but his death was swift."

I dropped my gaze to my bed sheet and twisted the hem of my shirt around my fingers. Repeatedly. Yeah, it would have been better not to know. I could picture it. I could imagine the fear in his eyes. On his face.

"Bella? I would like you to do something for me."

I looked up again, into the eyes of the man who had been by my hospital bedside more times than I could count. His expression was the same now as it had been all those times before.

"I would like you to eat something. Esme has made you dinner. It's waiting for you on the table. Can you do that for me?"

Why would it matter if I ate? I nodded anyway.

My body felt like lead as I dragged it off my bed. Edward immediately flanked me and wrapped his arm around my waist. He helped me downstairs and into the kitchen. He settled me into my chair. I felt a little like an invalid.

I had no appetite whatsoever, but I took a bite just to appease them. They were both watching me. After several more, I started inhaling it.

"She'll be fine," I heard Dr. Cullen whisper.

He seemed to be right about that. I was already starting to feel a little better. More human, anyway. Still a bit off, but not like I was stuck between dream and reality.

Dr. Cullen saw himself to the door as Edward took a seat across from me at the table. I was still shoveling my food.

"I'm sorry for upsetting you."

I shook my head as I swallowed. "I'm sorry for freaking out on you. How Waylon died isn't as important as the fact that he did. If it _had_ been some wild animal, it wouldn't have made it any less upsetting. I think it was just then that it really hit me. His death, while I knew it had happened, was sort of… I don't know… in the back of my mind. It was like a distant understanding. It's not distant anymore."

"You were frightened by… who was responsible for his death."

I nodded. There was no point in denying it. "I think that hit me right then, too. I knew bad vampires existed, because you told me they did, but I pushed that aside, to deal with it later. Later just chose that moment to hit me."

"Because of me."

"Stop it, Edward." He was feeling guilty, and I didn't want that. It wasn't his fault. Waylon's death wasn't. The fact that bad vampires were responsible wasn't. My reaction to it all wasn't. "I would have had to deal with it eventually. You might not have even been here when it did finally click. I'm glad you were."

He was silent for several long seconds before he spoke again. He seemed to be absorbing that piece of information.

"Eat."

Of course.

He fussed over me like that for the remainder of the night. He stared at me constantly. With every sigh that escaped me, he winced. When I wanted a glass of water, he ran to get it. As I took my shower, he stood just outside the door. When Jake called, he hovered over me. Two minutes after ten, he told me to go to sleep.

I didn't argue once. I knew what he was doing. He was _protecting_ me, because he felt he had failed at doing so earlier by upsetting me.

Seven minutes after ten, as he stared at me from his position of beside me on the bed, I asked, "Are you done now?"

"No."

He knew what I meant.

"Edward, stop it. Thank you, but stop it. I'm fine."

He scowled a little, like he didn't exactly believe that, but wanted to. "Sleep."

I rolled my eyes. "Join me," I counter-demanded. He quirked an eyebrow. As I patted the bed beside me, I quirked my eyebrow right back at him.

That got a smile out of him. He settled in next to me, him on top of the covers I was underneath, then we both turned to face each other.

And then we connected on that deep and profound level I was so very fond of. Staring, just staring, until I finally nodded off.

In the morning, I found myself snuggled against him, his arm around me, with my head on his chest.

I froze. I didn't dare move. It was too perfect. But it felt fragile. Breakable. Like if I just twitched wrong, it would fracture the moment.

"I know you're awake."

So much for that.

"I don't want to move."

"We have a few more minutes."

Maybe it wasn't that breakable after all. I sighed contentedly as I snuggled in deeper.

"We can go back to my house tonight."

I smiled. Alice had been right.

"Come here after school. We will go to my house at sunset."

Right. I was driving myself to school.

"I'm assuming you're staying here?" I asked. He nodded. "What will you do all day?"

"Count the minutes until you return."

"You forgot: and text you during lunch."

"Yes. How very neglectful of me. I do apologize."

He was being playful! Seemed I wasn't alone in my good mood. "Apology accepted."

"Alice brought your breakfast early this morning. Before sunrise. A blueberry muffin with accompanying fruit."

"Sounds perfect." It did, too. Finally, a meal I could finish. Esme always made way too much food for me. I was going to gain fifty pounds by the end of the two weeks, I was sure of it.

Or maybe not. Maybe it would be a hundred pounds.

After reluctantly tearing myself away from Edward and getting ready, I entered the kitchen to find the before mentioned muffin, sitting on a plate, on the table, with the bowl of accompanying fruit beside it.

It was _huge_. It could have fed three people, easy.

"I think your mom thinks I'm multiple people. You could feed a family of four with this breakfast!"

Once again, he held my chair out for me.

"That is an exaggeration."

"Okay, then, a family of three."

He scoffed as he sat across from me. "Eat what you can. Perhaps take the rest with you."

I pinched a piece off the top and popped it in my mouth. God, it was _amazing_. "Um, yeah, good idea," I mumbled as I chewed. I almost didn't even need to chew. It melted like butter, it was so moist. "I feel bad that you'll be stuck here all day. There's no way you can sneak out?"

He shook his head. "I don't mind. I like it here."

That surprised me. My house was pretty boring in comparison to his house. And if he was at his house, he could leave and go do something. Run. Hunt. Fly through the trees.

"You do?" I asked.

He nodded. "It smells like you. I can taste you in every room."

Whoa. Okay. That was not the answer I was expecting.

My initial reaction was to question him, but then I sort of understood what he meant. Some scents can leave a taste in your mouth, and what with him having _super senses_…

"And that's a good thing," I said instead.

"Yes."

I smirked. "Okay, well, you enjoy that, then."

He caught that I was teasing him and smirked back. Playful Edward was fun. I didn't know what had happened to ease his worries from the night before, but I was grateful for it.

I mowed through about a third of the muffin in no time, then moved on to the fruit.

"Could you get me a zippy bag for this?" When he quirked an eyebrow, I laughed. "Bottom drawer," I said, pointing. "Sealable plastic bags, in a rectangular cardboard box."

I had to force myself not to laugh again when he located them. He inspected the box, poked at the plastic bags inside, then handed it over to me. I pinched one and yanked it out, then handed them back to him so that he could put them away.

"You've been out of the human loop too long, my friend. This is pretty basic stuff here."

"We have no need for… _zippy bags_… at my house."

"Yeah, I guess not. No leftovers after a hunt?"

He tensed again. Crap. Playful Edward was a fragile thing.

"Okay, I have to ask… why do you always tense when I mention that?"

He tensed further, then scowled. "It's a difficult subject."

Obviously. "Why?"

He took forever to answer. I knew he was trying to work himself up to it – trying to find the right words – so I just ate my fruit and waited. I was pretty much done by the time he finally replied.

"When we hunt, we are at our least civilized."

"And… talking about it might trigger that?"

"No."

I couldn't wrap my brain around what the problem was. So much for being amazingly perceptive.

"Help me out here, Edward. I don't understand."

He took another long forever to reply.

"I don't wish for you to know that side of me."

"I already know that side of you exists. What would it hurt if I know the details?"

He sighed, heavily, still avoiding eye contact. His expression turned pained. "Sunday. Jasper. On the stairs."

He looked up at me then, willing me with his stare to understand. It took a moment.

"Oh." Jasper had looked crazed. Possessed. Wild and completely out of control. Edward didn't want me to think of him like that. It was hard to think of him like that. Not _hard_ like it was unsettling, _hard_ like it was difficult. He was always so prim and proper.

"That part of my world must remain separate. I'm willing to share with you, all except that."

"Could I ask you just one more thing about it? Then I'll drop it." I sensed he was about to say no, so I quick and asked it anyway. "Are you safe when you… do that?"

He smiled. It was slight, but it was good to see.

"Yes."

I gave a nod, downplaying my relief, then moved to clear my place at the table. He stopped me.

"You can go brush your teeth. I will clean the dishes."

I _so_ wanted to see that – Edward being domestic – but that would defeat the purpose of why he had offered. He was giving me more time by volunteering to help.

I begrudgingly left him to it and raced through the rest of my morning routine. When I bounded down the stairs, Edward was waiting for me by the door.

What's that saying? Absence makes the heart grow fonder?

Yeah, not so much. I wasn't even out the door yet and I was already missing him. It didn't feel 'fond'. It felt like crap.

As soon as I was off the steps and on the landing, he held his arms out to me. I nearly leapt towards him. Warm, fragile flesh met cold, forgiving rock.

Another dose of Drug Edward shot through me, warming me, making me dizzy. I had only known Edward Cullen for seven days – one week – and he was already as important to me as anyone else I had known all my life.

"I'll miss you today," I whispered. I wasn't even sure how I was going to let go of him and walk out the door.

"Hmmm. Eight hours isn't so long."

Eight hours? God, was that how long it was going to be? It would seem like an eternity.

"Long enough," I countered.

I opened my eyes as he started to pull away, but they drifted closed again when he did that hand-in-my-hair thing I loved so much.

"Your education is important, Bella."

I forced my heavy lids to rise. God, would I ever get used to the intensity of his stare? Struggling to breathe, I nodded.

My haze lifted slightly when I heard the jingling of car keys. When he smirked, I looked down towards the sound.

"She's yours. Be good to her."

That got me grinning. He thought his car was a 'she', too!

"We're old friends now, her and I," I teased. Then I plucked the keys from his hand and headed out the door. "Don't forget to text me!"

**To be continued…**

**Author's Note:**

Posted without a safety net. Hope the mistakes were minimal.

The reviews have been fantastic! Thank you so much for the kind words and encouragement! It means a great deal to me.

It looks like people are all for a long epilogue chapter. Okay, then! I will keep on going!

Please review, and MTLBYAKY


	17. Chapter 17

**Two Weeks**

ChapterSeventeen

By: Jana~

**XXX**

I parked in my usual spot, only instead of my rusted-out Chevy it was Edward's Volvo, then locked her up and set the alarm. She loved me. The feeling was mutual.

And of course Jessica was waiting for me. She looked like she was trying to hide again, but when she saw I was alone, she bolted right for me.

"Where's Edward today?"

Crap. Why hadn't I given thought to what excuse I would give? She – others too, maybe – would certainly question why he wasn't dropping me off or picking me up.

"He had… an appointment today."

Lying sucks. Or at least me trying to did.

"What kind of appointment?"

Doctor's appointment wouldn't work. His dad was a doctor. Dentist? Maybe, but they wouldn't be open that early in the morning, and the visit wouldn't last all day so that he couldn't pick me up.

I decided to skirt it. "I didn't ask."

She, of course, continued to follow me. I was seriously starting to wonder why she cared so much. Edward didn't answer me when I had asked before. He just gave contradicting comments, and then he dropped it. Or I did. Maybe if I hadn't, he would have told me.

"Why not? Boyfriends and girlfriends tell each other stuff like that. You guys _are_ boyfriend and girlfriend, _right_?"

We were, at least as far as I was concerned, but I wasn't about to tell _her_ that.

"I've only known him seven days, Jess." That wasn't a lie. It was an implication. Let her draw her own conclusions.

"Has he asked you to be?"

Or maybe not. She jumped to conclusions all the time. Why couldn't she do it now and leave me alone?

I stopped dead in my tracks. I was just tired of it. It had to end.

Jessica took several steps from the momentum she had gained before turning to face me. She almost looked confused.

"Why do you care, Jess? What business is it of yours, what their medical history is, what kind of house they have, furnishings, money, my friendship with Edward?"

She looked affronted, but she also looked a little pissed.

"Friends share with each other, _Bella_. I _thought_ that was what we were!"

I didn't even respond. I just shook my head, scoffed, then started walking again. Surprisingly, she didn't try to follow me.

Since I knew she didn't actually care for me – Edward had told me that much about her thoughts – I knew what she had just spewed was a lie. I was done playing games. Tired of pretending. Sick of the pretenses. She wasn't my friend, and I wasn't hers.

I fumed all the way to history class. I didn't even smile at Angela. I just slammed my backpack onto the floor and dropped angrily into my seat.

"You okay?"

"No," I answered.

"Want to talk about it?"

"Jess." That was all I said. That was all I had to say. Angela would know what I meant by that.

"I'm sorry. Want me to talk to her?"

My anger eased a little. Angela sure was a good friend. "No, that's okay. No point in her hating both of us."

"That bad?" she asked. She sounded worried.

"I think it might be. I a little bit told her off."

"Uh oh."

I had to laugh at that. "Yeah," I agreed.

The sound and vibration of my cell phone going off literally caused me to jump in my seat. I seriously expected it to be Jessica. I almost didn't even look at it because I was _that_ sure it was. I was glad I didn't ignore it.

'My dearest Bella,

Please let me know that you have arrived safely at school. Alice says you have, but I would like to hear this from you. I miss you.

Yours always,

Edward'

Instantly, my bad mood was obliterated. My heart soared.

'Edward,

Yeah, I'm here. Had words with Jessica. I think whatever kind of dysfunctional friendship we had is over now. I miss you, too.

Yours always,

Bella'

I signed off in the same way he had. It seemed the safest option. If I had chosen words that somehow implied a less sincere sentiment, it might have hurt his feelings. If I implied more, like I would have if I had said 'love'… Well, we hadn't even said that to each other in person yet. I didn't want the first time we did to be in a text message. Usually, I didn't sign off at all in messages. Rarely even in email. It's not like people didn't know who I was. But his message was formatted so formally, I felt weird not copying it.

Edward was even prim and proper while texting. It made me smile.

"You seem to be in a better mood," Angela mentioned.

I gave my cell phone – which was now in my lap and out of the teacher's sight – a little waggle. "Edward," I said.

She mouthed the word 'ah', then faced forward again, allowing me my privacy.

'Dearest Bella,

Please, don't give Jessica a second thought. She is ridiculous and mean spirited. Your class will start soon. Will your teacher be cross with you for speaking with me?

Yours always,

Edward'

Yeah, probably. But I didn't want to stop talking to him. But I also didn't want my cell to be confiscated. I quick and turned the volume off on my incoming messages, then disabled the keypad sounds. The 'beep, beep, beep' as I composed responding messages would be a dead giveaway to everyone in the room once it fell silent.

'Edward,

If I'm careful, I won't get in any trouble. The thing is, I just don't get why Jessica cares so much. She's always been a gossip, but this seems to go beyond that. It's like she's fishing for something else. She doesn't suspect you're a… Does she?

Yours always,

Bella'

Seconds after I hit 'send', the bell rang. I kept my phone just beneath the line of my desk, still in my lap, and pretended to give the teacher my full attention. The screen lighting up was the only indicator of a new incoming message, so I glanced down often. Angela noticed. I knew she had, because she kept shifting her eyes to the side, watching me.

When the teacher's back was turned, she whispered, "Be careful."

I gave a subtle nod.

'Dearest Bella,

She does not suspect. Please, put her out of your mind. When the time comes, I will deal with her.

Yours always,

Edward'

Huh? What was that supposed to mean?

'Edward,

Deal with her how? I don't understand.

Yours always,

Bella'

The nudge against my shoulder startled me. At first, I thought that I had been caught, and that Angela was warning me. But no.

"Page ninety-eight." She mouthed the words inaudibly, then she gave her own textbook a pointed glance.

Oh! The teacher wanted us to read!

That actually worked out well for me. I yanked my book from my backpack, found the page, then pulled it to the edge of my desk. To anyone looking, it just seemed that I was reading. I turned the page whenever Angela turned hers.

'Dearest Bella,

You needn't worry. I should warn you. Alice is planning a welcome home party for you tonight. If this makes you uncomfortable, I will stop her.

Yours always,

Edward'

A welcome home party? Weird. Any kind of party thrown in my honor was a bad thing – added attention and all that – but, that aside… It wasn't _my_ home I was going to. It was _theirs_. I was just their guest.

'Edward,

I'm not big on parties, but it would probably hurt Alice's feelings if you stopped her. Let her throw it. It's fine. Busted. Can't talk. Don't respond.'

I quickly clicked 'send', then hid my phone between my legs as the teacher stood in front of my desk and glared down on me. Angela had nudged me, thankfully, but it had been too late. Mr. Jefferson held his hand out towards me.

"What?" I asked. I tried to sound innocent, but failed. I had guilt written all over my face.

"I know it's a non-work day, Miss Swan, but texting in class is still not allowed."

His hand remained extended.

"I wasn't texting," I lied.

He pulled his fingers towards himself three times in rapid succession. "You can have your phone back after class."

Crap. Reluctantly, I surrendered it. When the teacher walked away, Angela shot me an apologetic look. I just shook my head, dismissing its necessity. Then I gave the pages in front of me my actual attention.

Thirty minutes later, and my cell phone was back in my possession, after receiving a smirk from Mr. Jefferson. Everyone seemed to be finding me amusing lately.

"I'm really sorry I didn't catch it sooner, Bella," Angela apologized.

"It's not your fault," I muttered as I clicked my way into text mode. "Thanks for giving me the head's up. I was at least able to warn him."

"He's a fast typist," she mentioned. I stiffened. "It seemed you had barely sent one off and you were getting a response."

"He's a pianist," I said. That wasn't a lie. "Fast fingers."

She laughed. "I guess so."

I was too busy composing a message to really engage her in conversation. Or to walk properly. I tripped over my own feet, but luckily, Angela held out a stable hand so that I wouldn't fall flat on my face.

"Thanks."

She laughed again.

'Edward,

Sorry about that. The teacher caught me. He took my phone away for the remainder of the period. We should probably just wait until lunch to talk. The next teacher might take it for the day.

Yours always,

Bella'

"Multi-tasking… not such a good thing for me," I said to Angela, after I had hit 'send'. "That's why I never chew gum. I have to walk eventually."

She laughed hard at that. It made me smile. She really was good for my ego. Not everyone got my sense of humor. Too dry or subtle, maybe.

"You want me to sit with you at lunch?" she asked. "Or do you need alone time again?"

"I'll be in the cafeteria, but I'm not sure I'll be much company." Just then I got Edward's responding text message. I waggled my phone again as my point.

"He must be a really _good_ pianist," she said with a smirk. "We'll talk between texts, if there _is_ any time between."

We both lingered by the door, just outside of our Math class. "I would like the company." And I would have to tell Edward to time the texts better.

"It's a date." She laughed, then walked into the room.

I waited to join her. We didn't sit together anyway.

'Dearest Bella,

I was concerned that your teacher would be cross. We will wait until your lunch period to speak again. I will miss you until then.

Yours always,

Edward'

I didn't want to wait that long to talk to him again. Even though it was only words on a screen, I felt the connection to him, and I didn't want to give that up.

'Edward,

I'll text you again before Spanish starts, just to say hello. Feel free to read or listen to music to pass the time.

Yours always,

Bella'

I quick and tucked my phone into my pocket, then entered class, right as the bell rang. Mr. Varner glared a little as I walked to my seat.

Yeah, no way was I chancing texting in Math. The teacher looked none-too-pleased with me already.

I had to leave building two to get to Spanish class, which was the other class besides Gym, Biology, and English I didn't have with Angela. Her Gym and Biology classes were flipped, and she decided on French over Spanish. Because of that, she had third period English and sixth period French.

Since it was a sunny day, I figured I would be able to walk across the quad and text at the same time without slipping. Not so much.

'Edward,

I'm on my way to Spanish class now. Are you keeping busy? I know you said you don't watch TV much, but you can if you…'

Splat. My feet really did hate me. I'm surprised I didn't break my phone. It wouldn't have been the first time. Or the second. I was on my third phone already, in less than that many years. Charlie told me he wasn't going to buy me anymore, but he did opt for the added insurance. Did that cover stupid face-plants?

I picked myself up, ignored the kids laughing at me, and moved on towards building one.

'…want to. And I just fell flat on my face. I think I must be the clumsiest person on the planet.

Yours always,

Bella'

I was going to be late, so I picked up my pace… a little easier to do since my nose wasn't buried in my phone.

'Dearest Bella,

Love, are you hurt? I will find a way to go to the school.

Yours always,

Edward'

Love? Was that a term of endearment? If I _was_ hurt, I couldn't feel it. The adrenalin from seeing that dwarfed everything.

'Edward,

No, I'm fine. It happens to me frequently. Just my pride is stinging a little. People laughed at me. That also happens frequently. Don't risk coming here, please. I'm okay. Your term of endearment just made my day, BTW.

Yours always,

Bella'

Seconds after I clicked 'send', I wondered if I had made a mistake. Acknowledging the love word, I mean. Maybe he did it without thinking. Maybe it would embarrass him that I mentioned it.

Or maybe it wouldn't.

'Dearest Bella,

I am so relieved that you are not injured. I will stay at your house, per your request. Please be careful, love. You're so frail. I'm pleased I could make your day, but what does BTW mean?

Yours always,

Edward'

Oh. Yeah. He wouldn't necessarily know chat-speak. And he called me 'love' again!

'Edward,

Last message or I'll be late. BTW = by the way. It's chat-speak. I'll explain in more detail later. I need to come up with a term of endearment for you now!

Yours always,

Bella'

I shoved my phone in my pocket and rushed into the classroom. My butt hit the seat right as the bell rang. No glare at all from Mrs. Goff. Good thing, too. She always made us speak Spanish when talking to her, and I didn't know how to say: Sorry for being late. I face-planted on my way here.

Non-lesson days were easy. Mrs. Goff just asked us to read through our graded assignment from last week and correct all the mistakes we had made. No problem. I only missed two. I was done in three minutes, then I spent the rest of the time trying to come up with a term of endearment I could call Edward.

Not as easy as it sounded. He didn't seem like a 'honey', or a 'sweetie', or a 'baby'. Calling him 'love' wouldn't work, because apparently, that was _my_ name.

Nothing seemed fitting. He had a certain presence about him… a name other than Edward just didn't seem appropriate. I couldn't even fathom how I had once considered that he might like to go by Ed or Eddie.

The bell rang, and my heart soared. A full forty-five minutes of texting Edward! Or maybe we could talk. But, no, I already told Angela I would sit with her. We wouldn't be able to talk as freely as we could if we texted. She wouldn't even think of reading over my shoulder or anything.

'Edward,

I'm on my way to the cafeteria now. As soon as I get my lunch and get seated, I'll text again. Feel free to respond.

Yours always,

Bella'

I raced through the double doors and headed straight for Angela. She was already in line. Three people from the front of it, actually.

"Jess asked me to sit with her," Angela said in a near whisper. "I told her I was already sitting with you. She didn't seem too happy about that."

Guilt stabbed at me. "I'm sorry you got stuck in the middle."

She shrugged. "I've been your friend for longer, and I don't think she really likes anyone besides herself. It was an easy choice."

I had to smile. I had always appreciated Angela's friendship, but in light of what Edward had said about her, and now with the solidarity she was showing me, it made me value her on a whole new level.

"I don't think she'll bother you today," she continued. "She went outside to go soak up some sun."

A quick glance confirmed that she, indeed, wasn't in the cafeteria. I gave a nod, then selected my cheese sandwich from under the glass as we moved up in line. I doubted I would eat much of it. It wasn't much of a sandwich, really. Soggy white bread, American cheese, mayonnaise, and mustard on the side if one was so inclined to add it. I usually wasn't. I also grabbed a juice and an apple. I would probably drink and eat those.

We made our way to the back, to the very table Edward and I sat at the day before.

As soon as I was settled, I yanked my phone from my pocket.

"Tell Mr. Speedy Piano Fingers I said hi."

I laughed as I nodded.

And then my heart soared again. Edward had already responded.

'Dearest Bella,

What are you eating for lunch this afternoon?

Yours always,

Edward'

Something that would make Esme cringe, no doubt.

'Edward,

A soggy cheese sandwich and an apple. Most of the sandwich will probably end up in the trash. Angela says hi. Oh, and you're responding to my texts too fast. She noticed how fast they're coming in. Slow down a bit. Use my messages as a guide. Match the timing.

Yours always,

Bella'

I took three bites of the sandwich before the next message came in. That was all I could stomach of it, anyway. And during those two and a half minutes, Angela shared her classmate's faux pas in French class the day before. Apparently, he meant to say something about running, but it came out as 'short hair' instead. She laughed hysterically over that. I guessed it was something you would have to be there for.

'Dearest Bella,

I want you to know that I am scowling. I tell you this because you cannot see me when we speak in this manner. Your lunch is inadequate. Did you forget the muffin that you sealed inside the zippy bag? Please respond to Angela in kind.

Yours always,

Edward'

The muffin! I quick and grabbed my backpack, then pulled it out and set it on the table before responding.

'Edward,

Thanks for reminding me! And stop scowling! I won't go hungry, promise. No one in their right mind would eat this crap, especially after eating your mom's cooking! Are you bored to non-tears yet?

Yours always,

Bella'

I immediately unzipped the muffin bag and pulled off a chunk. "Edward says hi right back," I told Angela.

She smiled. A genuine smile of approval. "Muffin?" she asked.

I didn't respond with words. I just pinched off a piece and handed it over to her. It was even better than I remembered. Angela obviously agreed.

"Oh my God, Bella, you've been holding out on me! I'd like to order a dozen of these, please!"

I would have laughed if my mouth hadn't been full. "I didn't make it," I mumbled around chewing. "Edward's mom did. She spoils me."

"She should open a bakery! She could make nothing but these and still make a fortune!"

I nodded, then gestured for her to help herself. There was more than enough to share. The soggy cheese sandwich had seen its last bite. Next stop, the garbage can.

'Dearest Bella,

I do not take the issue of your health lightly. Please take care to ensure you eat properly. Tomorrow, Esme will prepare you a suitable lunch, and I will deliver it to you at school. No, I am not bored. I'm conversing with you.

Yours always,

Edward'

There was only one bite left of the muffin, so I offered it to Angela, then I brushed the crumbs off my hands before responding.

'Edward,

Will we be meeting in the forest, or in the cafeteria? I'm glad you're not bored. I'm even gladder that I'm the reason why you're not. I ate the muffin, shared with Angela, and now I'll eat the apple. Okay? Don't worry about me so much. I've managed to stay alive this long, right? Oh, and Angela would like your mom to open a bakery.

Yours always,

Bella'

"I've never seen you this happy before, Bella. Edward is good for you."

I grinned. "I really like him, Angela. I know we haven't known each other long, but I really do."

"Some people just click," she said supportively. "You two obviously have."

That was exactly what it was like. We had clicked.

"I think you're right. I'm glad you don't think I'm crazy. It feels good to talk about it."

"You're not crazy. You're in love."

That shocked me. I knew I was, but was I that obvious? "Same thing, some say."

She laughed, but the smile that accompanied it faded. "Then I wish I was a little crazy right now. Eric _still_ hasn't asked me to the prom. I'm starting to think he's not going to."

"_You_ should ask _him_," I suggested. "You're a strong woman, Angela. Take charge."

Her smile returned just a little. "Yeah?"

I nodded. "Strongest woman I know. I've seen the way he looks at you. He'll say yes, I'm sure of it."

And I was. I had often wondered why they didn't just take the shot and get together already.

"Thanks, Bella."

I gave a nod, but then my cell phone's screen lit up, and my eyes shifted to it instantly. She laughed as she gestured for me to go ahead.

'Dearest Bella,

I will know better tomorrow, whether we will be meeting one place or the other. Yes, you have kept yourself alive, but I wonder how at times. It frightens me how frail you are. I will pass Angela's compliment along to Esme. She will be pleased. Eat your apple.

Yours always,

Edward'

How did he know I hadn't eaten my apple yet? That thought shifted to the side of my brain as I gave thought to the rest of what he had said. He was, essentially, scared of losing me. My frailty made me vulnerable to so many possible deaths, and my proneness to injury only added to that. I would never have to worry about him. He was nearly indestructible. But he would probably _always_ worry about me. I could only imagine how hard that must be for him. I knew it would be torture for me, if the tables were turned.

'Edward,

I'm sorry my frailty scares you. Please, try not to let it. I know, easier said than done. Just try, though. Okay? And how do you know I haven't eaten my apple?

Yours always,

Bella'

"You look worried. Everything okay?"

"Hmm?" I snapped out of my daze, then forced a smile for Angela's benefit. "Oh, yeah, everything's fine."

That wasn't exactly true, but I knew it would be, in time. And explaining would be difficult at best. At worst, it would be a major problem. Angela couldn't know _that_ much. It had felt good to share with her, but I still needed to be cautious.

'Dearest Bella,

Yes, easier said than done. I know you have not eaten your apple, because you take longer to respond when your hands are otherwise engaged. Eat. Your lunch period is almost over.

Yours always,

Edward'

I clicked out of text mode to check the time, and sure enough, I had only minutes left. I power-mowed through my apple before texting him back.

'Edward,

Apple has been successfully eaten. Last message. I can't be late for class. Mr. Molina is usually lenient, but he won't be today, because of state testing. I'll text you before I leave for home. I can't wait to see you.

Yours always,

Bella'

"You go to the library today, right? Because of testing? Instead of the gym?"

Angela nodded. "I'll walk with you. We better get going."

She had apparently realized the time as well.

'Dearest Bella,

Thank you. For everything you said in your message, and for everything that you are. I will be counting the minutes until I see you again.

Forever yours,

Edward'

I almost tripped over my own feet again, reading that, as Angela and I walked briskly towards building three. He changed the sign off. Not by much, but the meaning was clear. Forever. And since 'forever' was a very real probability for him, it meant even more.

"You're not chewing gum."

Her joke brought me out of my thoughts, though my 'struck stupid' expression remained.

"I think we might be in love," I confessed, then I just stared at her, watching. She would think I was crazy now for sure.

Or maybe not. Her smile grew impossibly wide, and then she threw her arms around me and hugged me. Tight.

"I get to be the Maid of Honor, right?"

Whoa! Yeah, whenever I did get married, of course she would be. But, whoa!

"Angela… yes, but wait. We're talking _years_ from now."

She just pulled back, grinned, then announced, "We can't be late. Don't worry. My lips are sealed."

Before I could say anything else, she skipped off towards the library.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

Again, no safety net. My beta has been sixteen kinds of busy. Hope the mistakes are minimal.

I would like to take a second to answer a few questions posed to me…

OOC = Out Of Character – AU = Alternative Universe – 'Canon' means it follows the world as it was originally created. For example: Vampire Edward is canon, human Edward is not.

What I mean when I say that my fic has a lot of canon elements thrown in, just in different ways, is… I take certain moments from the books and/or movies, but insert them under different circumstances.

The Cullens aren't keeping their kids out of school in order to hide them. The kids have been through school several times, and just don't care to go through it again.

Why Carlisle offers to have Bella stay with them is explained later in the story.

Got a question… would people be interested in having chapters posted daily? Or would that be too much story too fast? I just have a scene or two left to write, and then I'm done with the epilogue, so, really, there's no reason why I can't start posting daily. Unless that would overwhelm people.

Let me know, 'kay? Majority rules.

Thank you to all who took the time to review! I very much appreciate it!

MTLBYAKY


	18. Chapter 18

**Two Weeks**

ChapterEighteen

By: Jana~

**XXX**

It was impossibly hard to focus on the test. So much so, that with several of the questions, I just guessed at the answers. My brain wouldn't stop screaming at me.

I knew Angela was joking… well, a part of me did… well, a part of _her_ was joking… but to hear it like that…

Marriage. Married. To Edward.

The constitution of marriage had always been a tricky thing, in my mind. A good thing, but not for everyone. Definitely not for my parents. But that aside…

I'd only known Edward for _seven days_! Wasn't it _way_ too soon to even be thinking such a thing? We hadn't even kissed yet, let alone done anything else. Wasn't there a million steps to traverse before even entertaining the notion?

As I had grown, I considered marriage to be something only older people should do. People in their thirties, at least, so that they were hopefully mature enough to make a commitment of that magnitude. Young marriage, according to the statistics, just didn't have a very good shot at working out. My parents were proof of that.

Yet here I was, at the ripe old age of seventeen, allowing the idea of it to dance pleasantly around in my head. Allowing my heart to feel the joy of it. Did normal people who were in love think like this? I'd known for most of my life that I was far from normal.

But thinking and dreaming was harmless enough, right? There was nothing saying we had to jump into anything. We could wait until our thirties to get married. If we could survive thirteen years together before we were old enough…

My heart stopped. My stomach rolled. All the blood inside me dropped to my feet.

Edward would never be thirty. He was frozen, forever at the age of seventeen. Years meant nothing to him. A hundred of them could pass, and he still wouldn't have aged a single moment, by outward appearances at least.

"Miss Swan? Are you alright?"

I heard Mr. Molina ask the question, but then again I didn't. I felt detached. My head was spinning. I looked up at him, but I couldn't focus. I saw _through_ him. Even as he approached my desk, he continued to appear dreamlike and hazy.

"Bella, are you ill?"

I forced myself to answer. "I don't think that cheese sandwich agreed with me. The cafeteria really shouldn't be trying to kill us on test day."

I heard the other kids laugh at that, but it sounded distorted.

"Mike, please escort Bella to the nurse's office."

Mike groaned. Then I felt his hand grip the underside of my forearm. It didn't hurt, but it lacked the gentle care that Edward used when helping me. Annoyed, I jerked myself away from him and grabbed my backpack off the floor.

"I can walk," I muttered, then headed for the door. Mike followed.

"I just don't want to fall behind," Mike said as we entered the hall.

I just shook my head. The sensation of that cleared it a little. "Go back to class then. I know where I'm going."

And I did, too. Not because I'd been to the nurse's office more times than all the kids at Forks High put together, but because I wasn't going to the nurse's office at all. I was going home.

I would tell them tomorrow that I was ill and confused, and forgot what I was doing. Where I was going. If they didn't buy that… well, I had a spotless record. I would get a slap on the wrist at worst.

Mike made it easy on me. He left me as soon as I had suggested it.

I disarmed Ms. Volvo, climbed into the seat, then brought her to life and sped out of the parking lot.

Edward was at the door, watching the street when I pulled up. I couldn't even remember how I got there. I just drove instinctually.

He couldn't leave the house to meet me, but I could tell he wanted to. He looked worried. In pain. _Scared_.

I avoided his eyes as I climbed the steps, but then I did nothing but stare at them as I approached and walked through the door. And then we just stood there.

His expression flashed a million emotions. He was trying to determine something. He was attempting to read me, becoming more and more frustrated by the moment because he couldn't.

"I'm okay," I said. His eyes narrowed.

How could I tell him? How could I explain that I was too stupid to add two plus two plus two?

"I don't think that sandwich agreed with me."

Mr. Molina seemed to buy that lie, maybe Edward would, too.

His eyes narrowed further. Okay, maybe not.

I sighed as I slipped my backpack off my shoulder. I just let it drop to the ground with a sickening thud. "Do I have to talk about it?"

His face softened, and then he gathered me into his arms. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to."

I melted against him. The obstacles we would eventually have to deal with blurred. Became distant. Unimportant, at least for the time being.

All that mattered was that I felt alive again. I would hold onto that feeling for as long as I possibly could, until time, age, or death forced me to relinquish it.

I was only vaguely aware that we were moving. That I had been scooped up into his arms and we were climbing the stairs. There was no 'whoosh'. No wind. No rush.

I felt the bed at my back, and then immediately I felt Edward slip in beside me. I clung to him, like he was my lifeline as I stared death in the face.

He never asked me to explain myself. He just held me. Comforted me, even though he had no idea why he was.

Or maybe he did.

"I only want for your happiness, Bella. But I won't leave your side unless you order me away."

"I don't want you to leave me," I whispered. But he would eventually, wouldn't he? And even if he didn't, I would, inevitably, be forced to leave him. Humans don't live forever.

But I didn't say any of that. I didn't know how. And, truthfully, I didn't even want to acknowledge it.

What was that saying? It's better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all?

Like Romeo and Juliet, maybe Edward and I would be the next tragic love story.

He held me tighter, making me question once again if he could actually read my thoughts.

I needed to stop thinking about it. It was going to kill me slowly if I didn't.

"When is Alice's party? As soon as we get to your house, or will we have some time?"

"We will have some time," he answered. "How would you like to spend it?"

I didn't answer him. I just snuggled in deeper, and then remained that way until thirty minutes before we were to leave. I took a shower, got ready, and then repacked my suitcase, all in complete silence. Neither of us said a word, but the vibe was thick between us.

It was like I was standing on a deserted road with a fork up ahead, knowing I would have to choose one path over the other. But, no, the road wasn't deserted at all. Edward was there, watching from a distance, waiting to see which prong I would take. He was hidden – he didn't want to sway my decision by showing himself – but I could sense his presence.

I moved around to each window in my room and closed them, saving the one he was sitting in front of for last. When I leaned past him, as I did so, I kissed the top of his head. His hands immediately found my waist, and then he brought me into his lap.

He stared at me, only stared, for nineteen years, and then he cradled my head to his shoulder. I wanted to reassure him, but I didn't even know where to begin.

"Are we leaving soon?" I asked. I knew we were, but I couldn't think of another way to break the silence.

"Yes."

He kissed my forehead before urging me to stand, then he grabbed my suitcase and laptop bag. He let me lead the way. I could feel his eyes on me all the way down the stairs, but when we stepped outside the door, after he grabbed my backpack off the floor from where I had left it, he averted his gaze.

Was he really that uncertain of what path I would choose?

I locked up, then led the way to his car.

"Would you like to drive?" he asked.

"No. I think I'd rather be the passenger this time."

This was for a few reasons.

First, I wasn't very comfortable on the winding path that led to his house. I would probably take it at a snail's pace, and that would lose us time in the long run.

Second, one should never drive while upset. My dad instilled that in me. Not even remembering how I got home earlier was harrowing enough for one day.

And third, I knew he would stare at me the entire time. With him driving, it would give him something else to think about for a short time. Though I suspected he didn't have to concentrate much when behind the wheel. Like everything else, it was an effortless task to him.

He threw my crap in the trunk, opened my door for me, closed it once I was seated, and then rounded to his side. He hesitated before getting in.

I wanted to tell him it was going to be okay, but starting a heavy conversation when there was no time to finish it seemed like a bad idea.

"This isn't a formal party, is it? I might be underdressed."

"You're perfect," he whispered. There was pain in his tone when he said it.

I hated myself so much in that moment. I had to do something to give him hope. I extended my hand towards him like an offering, like he had done so many times to me before. His eyes flickered in my direction, and then I saw a slight twitch at the corner of his mouth.

He held my hand for the rest of the trip, his grip gentle but firm. Almost desperate. Like he would never be allowed to do so again after that moment.

The gesture was meant to make us both feel better. It didn't seem to. My guilt soared.

I knew they were excited about my return, but the welcome I received made me slightly uncomfortable. Everyone but Rosalie and Jasper hugged me. Jasper tried to smile, but he looked guilty in the attempt. Alice seemed like she was ready to explode with excitement. Esme and Dr. Cullen acted like I was the missing lamb that was finally back within their flock. Emmett lifted me and spun me around, chattering about how my truck was a great piece of crap to work on.

Edward stood by the stairs, loaded down with my stuff, his eyes downcast. I _needed_ to talk to him.

"Um, Edward said that we have a few minutes before the festivities begin?"

Alice's grin widened. "Yep! There's no party without you! Take all the time you need."

She knew. Of course she did. She probably had a vision. My new friend's abilities would take some getting used to.

I gave a nod, then turned to face Edward. He still didn't look at me. He just started up the stairs. I followed, my mind buzzing.

We couldn't talk in his room. There was no privacy to be had anywhere in a house full of vampires. They would hear our slightest whispers. Or maybe that didn't matter. Maybe Alice already told them about the decision I had made.

And since Edward could read minds, wouldn't he know, too? He didn't seem to. He pushed my suitcase under the bed, then set my laptop and backpack next to it. He still avoided eye contact. He still seemed wounded.

"Can we take a trip?" I asked.

"Yes." He didn't even pause before answering. "Where would you like to go?"

"Not far. Around here is fine. Just… out of earshot?"

How far did their hearing reach, anyway? Miles?

"Are you afraid of heights?"

The question confused me. Yeah, I understood it, but I couldn't grasp why he had asked.

"Not really. I don't think," I added. He arched an eyebrow. "I've never tested to see," I explained.

He smiled. Just a little, but after the extreme tension we had been under since I had first arrived home from school, it was good to see. I smiled back.

And then he offered me his hand. I stepped closer, placed mine in his, and then I was on his back and we were flying out the window.

I watched the entire time. I forced myself to. He jumped from tree to tree, at least a dozen of them, before scaling the last. I likened it to how Spiderman could climb buildings. He seemed to be able to stick to it, in a way.

It was getting dark, but the moon was full and the clouds were sparse. I could at least see well enough to keep my bearings.

And I wasn't afraid of heights, it seemed. We were insanely high up, like if I reached out, I would be able to touch the stars in the sky. It didn't even make me nervous. The impending conversation did, though. I was almost dreading it.

He helped me off his back, but never let go of me. Falling would have been fatal for sure.

"Well, it's official," I said. "You can't read my mind." I had to start somewhere. A joke seemed as good a place as any. It wasn't.

"Did you think I was lying to you?"

Great. Total backfire. Instead of lightening the mood, I offended him.

"No. Of course not. Sorry. It's just, if you could, maybe you wouldn't be looking so tortured right now. Are you that unsure of my feelings?"

"No. The problem lies elsewhere."

Huh? "Care to explain?"

He took the better part of a century to answer.

"I often wonder if I'm being selfish, putting you in this position."

Huh? He wasn't making any sense! "What position are you putting me in?"

"You deserve to have a normal, happy life."

"Define normal," I said. Really, what did that even mean? "And do you honestly think I could be happy without you?"

"You should be allowed the chance to discover that without interference."

And that was when it hit me. Amazingly perceptive my ass. It was all so obvious, finally, that I felt the urge to smack myself in the forehead and scream: Duh!

He was talking about the metaphorical fork in the deserted road I was standing on. The path he was on was wrought with difficulties, and he was feeling guilty for wanting me to take it. For offering it to me at all.

I had been wrong before. He wasn't worried that I wouldn't choose him. He was worried that I _would_. The great protector in him was trying to _save_ me. But I didn't want to be saved _from_ him. I wanted to be saved _by_ him. He was the only one who _could_ save me.

I was never surer of my decision than I was right then. Like Alice had said, some things are worth the effort.

"And I suppose you think it's _you_ who's interfering somehow?"

"Yes."

I successfully forced myself not to roll my eyes, but my scoff could not be contained. "In what way are you interfering?"

"By existing."

That time I did roll my eyes. We were right back to the whole 'I'm a monster' thing. And I thought _I_ had low self-esteem.

"You said before that you wouldn't leave my side unless I ordered you away."

"Yes."

"Do you think I should? Do you want me to?"

He didn't like those questions. His expression changed. His confidence seemed rattled.

"Yes. No."

In that order. Yes, he thought I should, and no, he didn't want me to.

"Why yes?" I asked.

He didn't answer. He just made a request.

"Tell me why you came home early today."

He knew. Even with the inability to read my mind, he knew. And he was using that knowledge to answer my question without having to say the words himself.

"You think I'm perceptive, but really, I'm not. Something clicked, in the middle of class, and I had a moment of panic."

"You _are_ perceptive. Amazingly so. At times, to someone as astute as you, the obvious can be overlooked."

I didn't want compliments. I didn't want to tiptoe around the subject anymore. And I didn't want to be high in a tree, miles above the ground. I felt limited. Trapped.

"Can we continue this conversation at a lower elevation?"

Alarm flashed in his eyes. "Are you afraid?"

I wasn't. Surprisingly. It was peaceful. Beautiful. Something I would've liked to have seen during the daytime. Maybe he would bring me back if I asked him to, when we weren't trying to work things out between us. I was willing to bet the view was spectacular, if I could have only seen past the end of my nose.

"No." If he could give clipped answers, no elaboration, then so could I.

He just stared at me for a long moment, but it was too dark to see his expression anymore. I wasn't afraid of that, either. His arm was protectively around my waist. I knew I was safe.

I could feel him trying to help me onto his back, so I assisted, and then we were falling. That was a little unnerving, but not exactly scary. We seemed to be bouncing off the trees near the one we had been in on our way down.

The impact once we hit the ground was slight, but enough to realize it had happened. He then helped me off his back, and then his arm was around my waist again. I liked that. I liked the closeness, and the protective feel of it.

"Edward." I sighed his name, then gathered my thoughts. "I know this won't be easy, and the full magnitude of that _did_ hit me today, in class, but I don't care. I don't care that it won't be easy."

That saying came into my mind again, but I made a few alterations before quoting it.

"It's better to have _had_ and lost, than to never have had at all."

Saying the love word, even in a quote, just didn't seem like a very good idea. Not only because we still had yet to say it to each other, but because he was obviously still struggling. His conscience seemed to be battling between what he wanted and what he _thought_ was right.

"I believe that particular saying is: It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all."

I couldn't see it, but I knew he was smirking. I could just tell. I could hear it in his voice.

"Yeah," I said, "I know."

He had this _way_ about him. Like he could just flip a switch and, suddenly, I was a blithering idiot. His nearness had been comforting a second ago, which had felt good since the vibe between us was strained. Then, abruptly, there was a shift.

My heart was racing. My breathing turned erratic. I was being _lured_ again.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

Okay, majority says they'd like to see daily updates. So, here we are. And, once again, this chapter is brought to you without a safety net. My beta needs a hug!

Thank you so very much for all the wonderful reviews! They seriously mean a lot to me. If you've ever written and posted a fanfic, you'll know what I'm talking about.

I finished the epilogue last night. I want to run the last few lines by my beta, and depending on what she says, I might tweak it a bit, but otherwise, it's done.

Um, guys? The epilogue chapter is almost thirteen thousand words. I might have to break it up into two chapters. Opinions on that?

The entire fic, without added author's notes, is almost one hundred forty thousand words. It took me almost exactly seven weeks to complete it.

Now, I need to get back to writing the sequel to my novel. I'm nearly done, but took the time out to write this fic. I have found, if I don't go where my muse tries to lead me, she cops a hissy fit and won't let me write anything for weeks, sometimes months. I'm hoping she'll let me get back to it now that the fic is done. But don't get me wrong! I thoroughly enjoyed every moment I spent writing this. And I'm glad others are enjoying reading it.

I won't bombard you all with the shameless plug again, because apparently, some didn't care for that, but just a quick mention… My original novel is called 'The Mengliad', and is available on Amazon. The sequel, 'The Registry's Secrets', should be available at the end of September, if all goes well. If you're enjoying this fic, maybe go check it out?

Okay, this is a _long_ author's note, so I'll shut up now.

Please review, and MTLBYAKY


	19. Chapter 19

**Two Weeks**

ChapterNineteen

By: Jana~

**XXX**

He pulled me closer, and then his hand was in my hair. His fingertips caressed my scalp. His thumb brushed my cheek. I could feel his soft breath on my face.

He had said it with his eyes alone, but it had been loud and clear. Monday, after school, up against his car, in front of my house… I tried to kiss him, but he conveyed with the sweetest of smiles and the kindest of expressions: Not yet.

I didn't question it then, and I wasn't about to question it now. It seemed whatever he had been waiting for, he wasn't any longer.

Time seemed to be suspended in a dreamlike limbo. We were inches from each other – a fraction of space the only thing separating my lips from his – but neither of us made any kind of move to bridge the gap.

I wanted to. I wanted to move into him. Bridge the gap. I just wasn't sure if I _should_. It was as if he was working himself up to it.

He didn't need to breathe, yet he was. It matched the shaky quality of my own.

His eyes were barely open. His lips parted, then twitched a little. The anticipation was unreal.

When his nose brushed against mine, I inched closer. Instinctually.

That was bad. He created distance between us. Just a little, but it felt harsh.

"Just stay very still," he whispered.

And then the dance started over again.

Centuries passed, one slow, agonizing second after the other. I could almost feel myself aging.

And then I felt his nose brush mine again. I didn't move a muscle. The anticipation climbed from unreal to something bordering on catastrophic.

Just when I thought I couldn't take the extreme of it for another second, his lips finally touched mine. It was brief, but it felt like my heart and my brain exploded simultaneously. Pleasantly.

A new dose of Drug Edward coursed through me. Every part of my body warmed instantly.

Then his lips were back on mine, and something snapped. Not moving wasn't an option anymore. I was on some kind of autopilot.

I kissed him back. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled myself into him. I pushed my hands into his hair and fisted the tufts beneath them. Everything intensified. Everything.

My reactions. His reactions. It was almost frenzied.

Suddenly, the forest floor was at my back, and Edward was on top of me. I welcomed it. Encouraged whatever was about to happen by snaking my legs around his waist.

And then there was emptiness. Edward was gone. It happened so abruptly, it took my brain a second to wrap around the idea of it.

I sat up, pulled my knees to my chest, and scanned the darkness. I felt very small.

"Edward?" I sounded very small.

"I can't ever lose control with you."

If that was what losing control felt like, he could lose it all he wanted, as far as I was concerned.

"Did I do something wrong?" I asked. It felt like I had. I should have just stayed very still, like he had asked me to.

"No. The fault is mine. I got… carried away."

"I liked it," I admitted. I felt the flush of embarrassment soon after, but I didn't have time to suffer the effects of it.

I felt Edward settle in behind me. Felt his knees on either side of me, his legs tucked under himself. I instantly relaxed against him, my back to his front, as his arms wrapped protectively around me.

Time started to make sense again.

My arms rested on his legs as my hands played with his knees. I drew little circles, patterns, indistinct swirls and drawings. Don't ask me how I knew, but he seemed to like that.

"Do you have a super sense of touch, too?"

"Yes."

"Is what I'm doing bothering you?"

I knew it wasn't, but I thought it might be weird to ask: Do you like what I'm doing?

"No. It feels nice. Your hands are very warm."

They were? He could feel that through his slacks? With as cold as his skin was, maybe mine felt like fire in comparison. A pleasant fire, though, since he had said that it feels nice. Interesting.

"Will Alice hate me for staying away this long? It feels like we've been out here for hours."

Just the kiss alone seemed to take hundreds of years, not to mention the trip itself and the conversations before and after.

Thinking of the kiss made my heart pick up pace just a little. It was so much better than that dream I'd had on Monday night, after he had denied me the first time.

"No. We haven't been out here very long. She knows we needed this time alone."

Time had definitely been distorted before. Or maybe time to a vampire spent differently.

"How long is not very long?" I asked.

"Thirty-nine minutes."

I almost jumped from the surprise of that. Being generous, I would have guessed at least an hour.

"We have a few more minutes then? I don't want to head back just yet."

"Yes. Don't worry, Carlisle warned Alice not to overwhelm you."

"I'm not worried about Alice." Well, I was, but that wasn't the reason I didn't want to go back to the house yet. "I just wanted to spend some more private time with you."

"Hmmm."

That sweet hum of his would never get old, I was sure of it. It made me warm all over. Melt a little, even. I hummed right back, acknowledging it, though it sounded nothing like his melodic purr.

"If I promised to stay very still this time…?"

I dangled the question purposefully, hoping he would catch the implication. He did, but the response wasn't what I was hoping for.

"Soon. I need a little more time to… acclimate."

He hesitated again, but my brain was still too fuzzy to wrap it around the hidden meaning. Drug Edward had lingering effects.

I turned my head a little and nuzzled into the crook of his neck, breathing him in, attempting to hang on to the sensation for as long as I possibly could.

And then that weird possessed feeling came over me again, like when I had felt as if I was on autopilot earlier. I started kissing his jaw line, his chin… anywhere my lips could reach. When I kissed his Adam's apple, I could hear and feel him moan. It just spurred me on.

"Easy, love," he whispered. There was a hint of desperation in it. Slight, but it was enough for me to gather my wits.

"Sorry." It came out quieter than a whisper, almost inaudible, but of course he heard it.

He tightened his hold on me a little, reassuringly, and I instantly felt better. I felt forgiven. I felt loved. I felt protected.

And then I felt myself being brought up off the ground. He stood effortlessly – not an easy task to do from the position he was in – and then he turned me to face him. In the darkness, I could just make out that he was staring at me.

It was probably a good thing I couldn't see well. That I couldn't see his expression and intense eyes. With how my body was behaving, I just knew my knees would have collapsed from under me.

My breathing turned shallow and unsteady when his hand cupped my cheek. I leaned into it, increasing the contact.

"My dearest Bella…" He said this with that inflection of reverence I had come to love. And with the tiniest inkling of… amusement? Yeah, let's go with 'amusement'. "You needn't apologize. The problem is mine."

"I don't suppose you'd tell me what that problem is?" He didn't answer. He just continued to stare at me, his hand cupping my cheek. So I reminded him of something. "You said before that you were willing to share all except the one subject."

I had him there. I could almost feel him yielding, though it did take a while for him to actually answer.

"Acclimation."

He had said that before, but I had been too stuck on stupid to puzzle through it. He even hesitated on the word. I forced my head to clear enough so I could think properly.

He had said the same thing on Tuesday, when I mentioned that it seemed easier for him to be around me while in my _condition_.

Oh! Oh, God. It _hurt_ him to kiss me! That was why it seemed that he was working himself up to kissing me in the first place!

"Edward, I'm…"

I couldn't think of what to say. What could I _possibly_ say? It was like he was the starving man at the brink of death, only this time, the instruction that came along with the barbequed steak was that he had to _kiss_ it but not eat it.

"Shhh, love…" He pulled me to him, cradling my head as I pressed my cheek against his chest. "This is my burden to bear. I do not wish it to be yours."

Always protective. But how could I _not_ worry about this? How would I be able to experience any kind of enjoyment, knowing he was in agony? It seemed like the cards were stacked against us, in every way they could be.

And even still, I had no desire to walk away. Tragic love story or not, it _was _alove story, and I wanted it. Even if I couldn't ever kiss him, or do anything else intimate with him in the traditional sense, what I had with Edward was special. I didn't need to have a string of failed relationships behind me to realize that. Or any relationships behind me.

Edward was my first love. If I could have my wish, he would be my last and only love, too. Whenever Edward did decide to leave me, whether that be at age thirty, fifty, or eighty… how would I ever find someone else to fill his shoes? It would be impossible to.

He said he was mine forever. He said he wouldn't leave until I ordered him away. But, realistically, once I started looking like a grandmother…

I couldn't think of it. It was a lifetime away, anyway. I would have a lot of years with Edward before I had to worry about that.

The inevitable pain I would be faced with in the future was a small price to pay for time – any amount of time – with him now.

"We should probably head back." I didn't necessarily want to, but I knew we needed to. Alice and the others were waiting. Maybe even worrying.

He kissed the top of my head, lingering there for a moment as he inhaled deeply, and then we shifted so I could climb onto his back. I didn't watch the run that time. I just hid my face against his shoulder.

All of the Cullens, minus Edward, of course, were waiting for us in the living room when we returned. There were balloons, and candles, and flowers, and a table _full_ of food no one would eat but me. It hadn't looked like that before we left.

Vampires sure were fast and efficient. They had clearly decorated during the less than an hour Edward and I had been gone.

Alice was absolutely bursting. Even Rosalie seemed relaxed. Not happy, but she wasn't glaring at me or the floor, either.

"Right on time!" Alice chirped as she danced over to me. I stifled a laugh. With her abilities, any time would be considered that, since she would know it in advance.

She threw her arms around me, and it was only then that Edward let go of my hand, though he seemed reluctant to do so.

"That's from Jasper, too!" she said. I assumed she meant the hug. "Welcome home!"

She then took my hands and pulled me into the center of the room. It was the first time she had touched me without gloves on. Her hands were every bit as cold as Edward's. I don't know what I had been expecting. It was obviously a vampire thing, and since she was one, too…

"Thanks, Alice." I tried to sound grateful, but really, I was just uncomfortable. "You really didn't need to go to all this trouble."

She scoffed, and then Dr. Cullen added, "We tried to rein her in."

They failed. Or maybe this was considered moderate to a vampire.

Alice laughed. "As if you could."

Esme insisted I eat first, which was perfectly fine by me since I felt starving by that point, but to be honest, I wasn't even sure where to begin. There was no way I could have eaten just a little of everything, like I had been doing before. I would have exploded, there were that many varieties on the table. And there was a cake I was obviously expected to partake in after I was finished.

I ended up selecting three of the dozen choices. A pasta and vegetable dish with a rich tomato alfredo sauce, some kind of bread that was more savory than it was sweet, though the word 'bread' wasn't exactly the right definition for it. It was almost cake-like. And lastly, a simple salad. Well, as simple as Esme was capable of. The dressing was homemade. I suspected the croutons were, too.

And while I ate, they all watched. I was getting used to Edward watching me eat, but the rest of them…

Especially Rosalie. She seemed almost annoyed that I was eating at all.

After, Esme sliced me off a piece of cake that was way too large to finish, served with a cup of coffee that had a hint of chocolate and raspberry to it. It complemented the cake, which was also chocolate, with a raspberry filling and a rich butter cream frosting.

I was full to the point of uncomfortable. But the evening didn't end there.

Apparently, vampires like trivia games, although to call it 'trivia' implies pointless facts. The game we all then played was far from that.

No game board, just a stack of cards with questions on them. The categories were: Science, History, Literature, Music, Geography, and Religion.

I was asked to read Edward his questions, since he couldn't read my mind and therefore couldn't cheat. Emmett specifically enjoyed teasing him about that. I got the feeling that they played this game a lot, and that Edward always won because of his ability to pluck the answers out of the others' minds. At least that was the accusation.

He still won. And, of course, I lost. Really, how was I supposed to compete with vastly more intelligent vampires? Edward kept trying to give me hints, nudging me towards the right answers, which the others didn't seem to mind at all, but I still got far more incorrect than correct.

All things considered, it was fun. Rosalie actually smiled! It was slight, and it dropped quickly, but still.

And, weirdly enough, I actually did feel like I was home. Charlie, Renee, and I never had evenings like that. Well, when I was very little, we played games on occasion, but as I got older, not so much. We spent more time apart within our average-sized house than we did together.

The Cullens weren't like that. They seemed a very close-knit group. They were a _family_. Something that I had never truly been a part of.

I loved my parents, and I knew they loved me, but we coexisted under the same roof more than anything else. I was more like my dad, but my relationship with him consisted of very few words and even less socialization. Mom and I were almost exact opposites, but we had a better level of communication. The two of them rarely spoke, unless it was about me or bills. They yelled a lot, though, and usually over stupid shit.

Lids left off of toothpaste containers. Beard hair remnants in the sink. Cleaning firearms at the kitchen table.

Come to think of it, Mom started the fights more often than not. Charlie just yelled back to get a word in edgeways.

I thanked everyone for a fun evening, and then Edward and I went up to his room. It was still his room, even though I was staying in it for one more week, but it was starting to feel like _our_ room.

I liked that.

"I'm like an idiot compared to the rest of you. I felt like I should have been hanging out in the corner, peeling bananas with my feet."

Edward laughed. "Bella, you are far more intelligent than you realize. Those questions were very hard, created by us for us. You answered several of them correctly. Everyone was very impressed. Even Rosalie."

I just shrugged as I plopped myself down on his bed. _Our_ bed.

That was a jarring thought. Back at my house, he had taken to sleeping with me at night. Well, I slept, he just lied there, probably bored out of his skull. But still. I had to wonder if he would join me again, now that we were at _his_ house.

He sat beside me and took my hand, but there was a slight scowl on his face.

"You don't believe me?"

"It's not that," I answered. "My thoughts went in an entirely different direction."

"Will you share them with me?"

My heart sputtered as it picked up pace. "I was just curious about the sleeping arrangements tonight."

His scowl left. A smile replaced it. "What would you like them to be?"

He was amused again.

"I like it when you stay with me," I admitted. I was sure I had turned ten shades of red.

"There is something I must do tonight, but I will stay with you until you fall asleep, and will return to you before you wake up."

Curiosity got the better of me. You know how they say 'curiosity killed the cat'? Yeah.

"What do you have to do?"

He scowled again, deeper than before. "It's been a while since I have hunted."

Oh. The taboo subject. I changed it fast.

"It doesn't bore you? You know, hanging around me while I'm unconscious?"

His smile returned. "No. I like watching you sleep. It's fascinating to me."

Fascinating? Watching me just lie there like a rock and drool? Although, if Edward could sleep, I'd probably want to watch him, too.

"Well, then, you enjoy that," I teased.

He smirked, and then he went into all the reasons why he did actually enjoy watching me as I slept.

When my eyelids would flutter, he would entertain himself by guessing what my dreams were about. I talked in my sleep, which I knew, but apparently, I said his name a lot. He liked that. He also liked how relaxed I became. My face was free from worry or questions. My body was free from tension, and in no danger of injury.

He was in awe of how I would unconsciously gravitate towards him. He would try to give me a little space so that he wouldn't chill me too much, but after a few minutes, I was searching him out again.

I held _uncommon positions_ as I slept, according to him, which he would then attempt to correct with gentle touches here and there.

Maybe I should have been unnerved by that, but I wasn't. I knew he wasn't touching me in a lewd manner, and to be honest, even if he was, I probably still wouldn't have cared. I _wanted_ him to touch me. I wanted to be conscious for it, but if he felt more comfortable doing it while I was asleep – to _acclimate_ himself – then I wouldn't begrudge him that.

As far as I was concerned, my body, like my heart and soul, were his.

I dropped myself back on the bed and stared up at the ceiling, sighing contentedly. It had been a weird, long day, but it was ending on a good note, it seemed.

"That cake was amazing. Maybe your mom _should_ open a bakery, like Angela suggested. Muffins and cakes. I bet she would rock at cookies, too."

Edward settled beside me and smiled over at me, amused. "She would _rock_?"

I could tell by his inflection that he knew what I meant, but there was still a hint of curiosity in his tone.

"I really need to update you on slang," I said. Then I grinned. If he hadn't really been _out_ mingling with humans since the sixties…

I could imagine him saying stuff like 'groovy', and 'far out'. But, no, Edward wouldn't have. He was too prim and proper, and it wasn't just because he was out of the human loop. I suspected he had been like that even before he was changed.

"She would excel beyond all expectations, at making cookies," I said, defining the word 'rock'. Then I remembered. "Oh, and chat-speak…" I turned my head only to face him. "Abbreviations used when texting and talking on the computer. I don't use them too often, but I'll teach you what they are if or when I do."

He hummed in response, and my eyes drifted closed at the sound.

"I really love it when you do that," I whispered. Then I instantly regretted doing so. Not only did I say the love word, but I had once again tipped my hand. He was already too aware of what he could do to me. It was embarrassing how he affected me.

My cheeks flushed bright red, so I turned onto my right side, my back to him, and faced the window wall. I was almost in the fetal position.

Then I felt him shift his weight. He scooted up behind me and spooned me, which effectively turned me into a liquefied mess again. I tried to open my eyes, but I could see his reflection in the glass – which meant he could see mine – so I quick and closed them again.

"I love it when you share your thoughts with me so freely."

He whispered this, inches from my ear, and the liquid that I had become ignited. Like gasoline.

I wanted to turn in his arms and kiss him. I wanted to tell him I was in love with him. I wanted to do a lot of things, but I couldn't. Literally. The ability to function in any way beyond shaking and struggling to breathe closed down.

It was the luring thing. I knew he would never hurt me, but he could have at any time. I felt completely helpless, and yet I still wasn't afraid. It should have been unnerving, and in a way it kind of was, but only because my body was reacting in a manner that was foreign to me.

"You're safe," he whispered, and somehow, I found a way to nod.

And then I felt his lips on my neck. My existence swirled into darkness.

I must have blacked out. It was the only logical explanation. When I came to, I was on my left side instead of my right, gathered against Edward, him on his back and staring up at the ceiling.

"I'm sorry, Bella."

I propped myself up on my elbow. His eyes were firm but remorseful.

"Why are you sorry?"

"I wasn't trying to overwhelm you."

"I know. Are you under the impression that I'm upset with you?"

He closed his eyes. Tight. And then his expression crossed into agony.

"You should be."

I sighed, then started to lightly trace the line of his jaw. "You didn't do anything wrong. These feelings… they're just new to me. Intense. My body reacts in weird ways, is all. I guess I need time to acclimate, too."

His pain seemed to ease, but his eyes remained closed. "Were you afraid? You were trembling."

"No. And I know."

His eyes opened then, but he didn't look at me. He seemed surprised. "Then why were you trembling?"

He deserved the truth, embarrassing as it would be to admit. "I was… excited."

Yeah, that did it. I turned every shade of red ever cataloged, and several that had yet to be. In an attempt to hide it, I buried my face in his chest.

He didn't question me further. He just stroked my hair and hummed my lullaby.

I fought sleep for as long as I could – I wanted to stay awake, to enjoy his gentle affection and flawless voice – but it was soon a losing battle.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Note:**

Not Beta-ed.

To answer to a few questions…

I don't feel I can post the entire story all at once, because it is quite long, and I need time to go through each chapter, so that I can (hopefully) catch any mistakes and clean it up best I can. Also, every time I post an update, it brings the story back to the front page, which gives new readers who have not found it yet a chance to.

The metaphor about the fork in the road is actually a pretty old and well known one. Basically, Bella feels that she is facing a life changing decision. She is standing on a road that has a split in it (sometimes called a fork in the road), with two paths to choose from. One path (or prong on the fork) signifies a life with Edward, the other signifies a life without him. She doesn't see Edward nearby, but she can sense his presence. She thinks this is because he doesn't want to sway her decision on which path to take. All of this is just inside her head. She's not actually standing on a deserted road, facing the split in it, with Edward lurking just out of sight. It's just how she's feeling about the situation at that time. – Hope that's clearer.

Brooke (Brookieo): Your reviews make me smile! Yes, I wrote this in seven weeks. One day shy of seven weeks, actually. I received a review, where the reviewer very rudely insulted my interest in the TV show 'Friends' (calling me an obsessed stalker), and then told me to stop with the shameless plugs. So I did. And, um, yeah, I'm a pretty angsty person, LOL.

My beta did not care for the final bit of the epilogue, so I may or may not rework it. I thought it was kinda artistic, but she said it seemed 'summary-ish' to her. I'll give it a few days and reread it, and see how I feel then.

It seems people want me to post the entire epilogue at once. Totally not a problem. Just didn't want to overwhelm anyone. Guess you could always just… I don't know… take a snack break half way through, if it gets to be too much. (smile)

To those who have said that they plan to purchase my novel… thank you! I sincerely hope you enjoy it!

And thank you to everyone who has reviewed. I very much appreciate it! Please, keep the love coming, and let me know what you thought of this chapter.

MTLBYAKY


	20. Chapter 20

**Two Weeks**

ChapterTwenty

By: Jana~

**XXX**

Waking up in Edward's arms was just about the best feeling in the world. His tone, as he attempted to rouse me, was low and soft. Gentle. His fingers were caressing as he danced them up and down my arm. His nuzzling of my hair was accompanied by frequent kisses.

Alarms essentially screamed, in the harshest way possible: _Get_! _Up_!

With Edward, it was more like: I would love for you to join me in being awake.

And he always seemed to know when I was. The moment I felt even slightly lucid, he was wishing me a good morning, and asking how I slept.

And then I remembered something. "How was your night? Did you—?"

"Yes."

He interrupted me before I could even finish the question, but he didn't tense, like he usually did whenever I brought up the subject of him hunting. I took it as an encouraging sign and pressed a little further.

"How often do you need to do that?"

"Not as often as humans need to eat."

Still no tension. And the answer came quickly. Interesting. Did something happen to change his mind? Was he now willing to share? I braved forward.

"Alice and Esme do this? Rosalie?"

Rosalie wasn't as hard to believe. She had an edge to her. But Alice and Esme seemed so delicate.

"Yes."

There was a slight amount of tension that time, and the answer didn't come as fast, but I decided to continue anyway.

"Do you guys hunt in packs, or…?"

Yeah, I should have stopped while I was ahead. His entire body turned to stone. He stopped his unnecessary breathing. His arm around me tightened.

"I'm sorry. It's just… you seemed a little more willing to share. I was just curious. Relax. Please. I'll stop."

He did. He relaxed. Considerably. And then he sighed.

"I know you're curious, but too much information will allow you to imagine. I would rather you didn't."

"Do you think it'll scare me, to imagine you like that?"

He laughed. "Nothing seems to scare you."

"So, if that's not the problem, then what is?"

It took him years to answer, but I knew he would eventually. I was gaining a better sense of him. There was a subtle difference between his 'I'm not answering that' silence and his 'I'm thinking of how to answer' silence.

"I like that you don't see me as a monster."

"And you think if I imagine that side of you, that I'll start thinking you are?" He didn't answer. "I wouldn't think that, Edward."

He didn't respond to that, either, and then he just changed the subject.

"You should get ready for school. We need to arrive there early today."

It was a successful detour on his part. My curiosity piqued. "We do? Why?"

"You left yesterday without permission."

Right. Crap. My slap on the wrist would be waiting for me. Not such a big deal, though. And, really, no reason to get there early. Missing a few minutes of first period to deal with it wouldn't hurt my grade any.

"I have a spotless record, Edward. Trust me, we don't have to get there early. They'll just slap me on the wrist and send me off to first period."

He made a huffing sound. The idea of that clearly annoyed him.

"They won't _really_ slap my wrist, Edward. It's just a figure of speech. At worst, I'll get detention."

He huffed again. "No, you won't. Get ready. Breakfast will be waiting for you."

He slipped out from under me, and then he was gone.

But, how did he know I wouldn't get a detention?

Alice. She probably saw something.

I climbed out of bed and moved through my morning routine, then headed down the stairs for breakfast.

Esme had been busy. Not only was my breakfast ready and waiting for me, but so was my lunch for school. Beside the brown paper bag – which had my name so neatly penned on it, it looked like a professional calligrapher had written it – was a plate loaded down with six muffins, all sealed individually in zippy bags.

Edward was watching me as I entered. I smiled at him as I took my usual spot.

"What's with the muffins?"

"A gift for Angela. Esme was quite pleased by her compliment."

That was sure nice of her. Angela would be eating muffins for a week, morning, noon, and night!

"And the lunch? You're not bringing it to me today?"

"No."

I tried to hide my disappointment. I thought that was the plan. Maybe he was angry with me for pushing to know stuff he clearly didn't want me to know. I took a bite of my… Eggs Benedict? Minus the ham, but the sauce was definitely a hollandaise.

"Out of curiosity, who wrote my name on the bag?" I asked, attempting to sound nonchalant.

He quirked an eyebrow at me before answering. "I did."

Was there anything this guy couldn't do? Even his penmanship was stellar.

"Did you study calligraphy or something?"

"Yes, but not in a classroom."

I gave a nod, then fell silent as I continued eating.

I had to know. If he was angry with me, I needed to apologize. Find a way to fix it. But I wasn't sure how to go about bringing it up.

Finally, after fifteen years of awkwardness, I asked, "Will it be safe to go to the forest today?"

"No."

He didn't exactly sound mad, but he seemed, at the very least, miffed. He obviously didn't want to talk about it, though. I gave him a couple openings, and he never elaborated past his clipped responses.

I needed to listen to my inner voice more. I should have stopped asking him questions about his hunting activities, but I didn't. I ignored the possible ramifications and pushed him too far. Now he was upset with me.

I wouldn't make that mistake again. If he didn't want to talk about it, I wouldn't press for him to.

I ate the rest of my breakfast in silence.

When I came down the stairs after brushing my teeth, he was waiting for me by the door, holding my jacket and lunch, wearing a smile. Okay, maybe he wasn't that upset with me after all. Or maybe he was just a quick to forgive kind of guy. Either way, it made me feel a million times better. And then his gentlemanly ways added a million more to that.

He helped me with my jacket, holding it out to me so I could slip it on. He took my backpack so that I wouldn't have to carry it. He opened the house and car doors for me. As soon as he started the engine, he flipped on the heater so that I wouldn't be cold.

But still, we didn't talk. Not one word. Not until we entered school grounds.

Instead of pulling up to the curb, he parked.

"What—?"

He answered before I even had two words out of my mouth.

"I'm accompanying you to the office. I will get your door."

He still sounded miffed. But somehow, now, it didn't seem to be directed at me.

He offered me his hand when he opened my door. I took it, of course, and then everything just felt right. He carried my backpack and I carried my lunch as we headed for the office.

A moment before we entered, he leaned into me.

"Let me handle this. Please," he added, as if it were an afterthought.

What was going on? Was this situation the reason why he was upset? Did he really think a slap on the wrist or detention was such a big deal?

"Mr. Cullen! It's a pleasure to see you again!"

Okay, wow. What the hell was that? Mrs. Cope sounded almost giddy! She was always nice, but in a very reserved kind of way.

"The pleasure is all mine."

He said this in a very smooth, suave manner, but it lacked something. A genuineness. Mrs. Cope didn't seem to notice.

"What can I do for you?"

She seemed more than just eager to fulfill whatever request he might make of her.

"There was some confusion yesterday," he said as he pulled a piece of paper from his pocket and extended it towards her. "Miss Swan fell ill…"

He trailed off as Mrs. Cope unfolded the note and began to read.

"My father is very insistent," he added, as she set the paper down in front of her.

"Of course. She does seem a bit peaked, doesn't she?"

Huh? I did? Confused, yeah, but I wasn't feeling ill at all.

"Just precautionary," he said. "She will also need to be assigned a day in which she can retake the test she missed."

"The scheduled make-up day for that is next Friday. I'll just put her on the list now, and excuse the absence, after I get your visitor's badge."

Visitor's badge? Like the one he had worn for lunch on Tuesday? He was staying?

I leaned in a little when Mrs. Cope started filling out the sticky guest tag.

'Edward Cullen'

'Bella Swan'

'All day pass'

He was staying! All day! That was why I had to bring my lunch!

When I felt Edward squeeze my hand, I realized I was grinning. I wiped it off my face before Mrs. Cope looked up from her task.

He seemed in a much better mood as we left the office. So it _was_ the situation that had him tense.

"What did the note say?" I asked. We started heading for my first period class as soon as we turned the corner.

"Carlisle explained that you had a mild case of food poisoning, and asked that I remain with you for the day, in case you began to feel ill again."

Sure. If Dr. Cullen said it, it would hold much more weight. But why not just tell me? And why was Edward really staying with me all day?

"Why didn't you tell me about the note from your dad?"

"You don't like to lie. This way, you didn't have to. I did it for you."

I didn't ask him why he was staying. It didn't matter why. I just wanted him to stay.

"I thought I upset you this morning," I said instead. "I mean, I know I did, but I thought that was why you weren't planning on bringing me my lunch today."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to leave you with that impression. It was never you who I was upset with."

That confused me. "Who were you upset with?"

"Myself," he answered. He tensed again.

"Why were you upset with yourself? You have every right _not_ to tell me things. I shouldn't have pushed you."

He stopped walking then. It was then that I noticed… while people around us were certainly curious, they were giving us a wide berth.

"Bella, I'm not upset that you are curious."

"Then why were you upset?"

It took several long seconds for him to answer. "I don't like using my… _abilities_… the way I did just now with Mrs. Cope."

Oh! He was purposefully _appealing_ to her – the charm, the voice – so that she would clear my absence and allow him to stay.

And then I felt guilty.

"I'm sorry. It's my fault that you had to."

"No, Bella, the fault is mine. I had an obligation to set it right."

I scowled. "How was this _your_ fault? You weren't the one who couldn't add two plus two plus two. You weren't the one who freaked out. And you weren't the one who walked off campus without permission."

"By existing. Your life was simpler before I came into it and confused it."

"No, Edward. Stop it." Irritation was in my voice, but I didn't care. I wanted him to hear it. "My life was _simple_ before you came into it. Not bad, but nothing special. You changed that. For the better."

My irritation seemed to help in some way. I doubt he completely believed me, but I could tell he wanted to. He brought our clasped hands up and kissed the back of mine. Then he smiled at me.

"Bells! Hey!"

Oh, great. Jessica sure had a way of killing a moment. Edward tensed. His grip on my hand – which he had dropped to our sides when we heard Jessica's voice – tightened.

"Mike said you left school yesterday 'cause you were sick. You seem okay now."

The implication was clear. She didn't believe I was ill at all.

"A little better today, thanks," I said. My focus remained on Edward through my peripheral vision. I gave the ground my outward attention.

"So, Edward, I see you're staying with us today." Jessica gave his name badge a tap.

That was not a good thing. Edward didn't growl, but his eyes darkened and he tensed further, almost like he was set to attack. I pushed myself up against him, hoping my body's contact would ease him down.

"Dr. Cullen wants Edward to keep an eye on me today. He feels responsible for me, since my folks are out of town, and what with him being a doctor…"

Jessica had basically ignored me, though I know she heard me.

"That's very _dutiful_ of you, Edward."

Four things came to mind at that moment.

First, Jessica seemed to be implying that Edward was only with me out of obligation. Like I was a chore he had been assigned. There was just something in the way she said _dutiful_.

Second, she was oblivious. Edward was clearly irritated with her, yet she acted as if she was completely unaware of it.

Third, Edward's irritation seemed to go beyond finding Jessica annoying.

And fourth, if I didn't get Edward away from her, something bad was going to happen.

He probably wouldn't hurt her – he had better control than that – but the more attention he brought to himself, the bigger the chance their family would be further scrutinized.

I decided to intervene.

"Edward? I don't want to be late for class."

"Yeah, you don't want to add another mark to your previously spotless record."

She said this with a combination of animosity and glee. Like she was jealous of my clean record, and happy that it was now marred. Which it wasn't, actually, thanks to Edward and Dr. Cullen.

I didn't care enough to correct her. I gave Edward a nudge, and he finally relaxed a little. When he looked to me, his eyes lightened.

"Ready?" I asked, giving a little jerk of my head in the direction of building two.

"Yeah, I should get going, too. I'll see you at lunch…" I thought she was talking to me, so I was just about to respond, but then she added, "Edward."

I could feel the rumble of his growl, but I couldn't hear it, which meant Jessica probably didn't know it had happened. I wasn't about to take chances, though. I tightened my grip on Edward's hand and pulled him with me as I walked away.

"Yeah, she hates me," I whispered, after we had some distance between us and Jessica. "I'm not asking for you to confirm it," I added. "I know she does."

"I'm sorry," he whispered back.

I wasn't. I honestly didn't care. I was tired of her insidiousness. Maybe there was a reason why she was the way she was, but that didn't justify her harassment of the Cullens. What, did she think she'd get Edward at a cafeteria table at lunch and just coax his life story out of him? And even if she thought she could, then what?

Well, I knew what she would do next, actually. She spread rumors like a plague, and she did it for no other reason than for the attention it would give her. She thought it made her popular.

"You have nothing to apologize for, Edward."

"Don't I?"

I stumbled to a stop, right before the door to the building. When I looked up at him, he had guilt written all over his face.

"No, you don't," I insisted. And then I replayed what had happened with Jessica a minute before, trying to determine where his remorse was coming from. But nothing clicked. Had he done something so fast, it was undetectable to me? Or to Jessica?

"I'm sorry for losing my temper."

Wait. I didn't see him lose his temper. If anything, I was amazed by his restraint.

"In what way did you do that?" Again, I had to consider the idea that he had done something undetectable to the human eye.

He sighed. "She very nearly found herself catapulted across the campus."

The mental image of Jessica in flight, flailing all appendages, made me laugh. And my laugh obviously confused him. His eyebrow quirked.

"Where I come from, that's the definition of _not_ losing control." His quirk turned into a scowl. I just rolled my eyes and dragged him towards the building. "C'mon. I don't want to be late."

The room fell deathly silent as we entered. All eyes had shifted to me and Edward. Even Mr. Jefferson's, though his didn't show curiosity. They showed annoyance.

I could tell he was about to say something, but before his mouth could even fully open to form words, Edward, very calmly, tapped his visitor's badge. The teacher's gaze dropped to it for a moment.

"I see. Well, Mr. …" Mr. Jefferson glanced again at the name sticker. "Cullen. Take a seat in the back. And just know, I won't tolerate any disruptions in my classroom."

"Yes, sir," Edward said, very respectfully. My classmates started murmuring.

He walked me to my seat, held my chair out for me, waited until I was settled before placing my backpack on the floor beside me, and then he casually strolled down the aisle towards the back.

I _so_ wanted to turn around and look at him, but I knew I would be caught doing so. All the kids were looking at me, except for the ones who were looking at him, and I could tell the teacher was just waiting for an opportunity to complain. He clearly didn't want Edward in his classroom.

Angela nudged me. "This is new," she whispered.

"His dad is a bit overprotective," I whispered back. "I was sick yesterday, and Edward is here to make sure I don't relapse or something."

"I heard you left. Mike said something about your lunch not agreeing with you."

"Yeah. Remind me to never get the cheese sandwich again."

She laughed, but then the bell rang, so she turned it into a cough and grabbed for her backpack to retrieve her textbook.

Mr. Varner was even more annoyed by Edward's presence than Mr. Jefferson had been. He even called the front office to be certain of the arrangements.

When he hung up the phone, his glare landed on me. "It seems a highly intelligent educator and a room full of gifted students are incapable of detecting if you're ill, Miss Swan." Then he glared at Edward. "You may stay, but you will sit in the back and make like the furnishings. Am I clear?"

Edward gave a curt nod, then gave my hand a tug and led me towards my desk. I wasn't sure how he knew which one was mine, but I stopped questioning how he knew stuff a while ago.

Same routine as before, only this time, he gave my shoulder a little squeeze before strolling to the back of the room.

Things in third period went very differently.

Mrs. Goff seemed thrilled to be seeing a new face. And then Edward greeted her in perfect Spanish – or at least I assumed it was; I only understood the first sentence – and the teacher shifted from thrilled to giddy. I only recognized a few words here and there, but from what I could gather, she had asked him where he was from, and he answered that he was from Alaska, originally, but spent a great deal of time in Spain when he was younger.

She had no problem at all with him being in her classroom.

And a pattern was starting to emerge. Men seemed to take an instant dislike to Edward, while women seemed to be smitten. Interesting.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

Okay, this chapter was beta-ed. Thanks, Kristy!

Quitting smoking sucks! Apparently, lack of nicotine makes me irritable and paranoid. You have Kristy to thank for this chapter being posted today. In my state of irritation and paranoia, I had myself convinced that the chapter sucked. Then I was on my way to convincing myself that the whole fic sucked. I even considered pulling it.

Yeah. Bad day for Jana.

But then, as Kristy was beta-ing for me, I reread all the reviews this story has received.

So many of you have been extremely supportive and kind… I wouldn't feel right yanking the story now, even if I am scared to death that it's about to plummet into crap.

I'm just in a really weird, bad place right now. Sorry.

Please review, and MTLBYAKY


	21. Chapter 21

**Two Weeks**

ChapterTwenty-One

By: Jana~

**XXX**

Lunchtime was sure to be interesting. And then Edward made the probability of that skyrocket.

We stopped off at his car before heading to the cafeteria, to get the bag of blueberry muffins Esme had made for Angela. By that I knew we would be talking to her at some point during the forty-five minute period. But then Edward, once again, surprised me.

After handing her the bag of individually zippy-sealed muffins, he asked Angela if she and Eric would like to join us for lunch. She seemed excited by that and agreed instantly. Eric seemed indifferent and only shrugged.

We had just barely taken our seats at what I was starting to feel was _our table_, when Jessica approached. She seemed happy, and oblivious as usual.

The tables comfortably sat five, though if you grabbed a chair from another table you could really fit six. Technically, there was plenty of room for Jessica to join us, but I suspected no one wanted her to. I knew Edward didn't, and I was pretty sure Angela wasn't too keen on the idea. Eric, as always, seemed indifferent.

"Hi, Edward! Mind if I join you?"

Edward's eyes darkened, but they didn't meet Jessica's.

"Yes. Our table is full."

I could see Angela watching carefully as she poked at a muffin through its plastic shield. Eric just started mowing through his bologna sandwich.

"There's one seat still available," Jessica said, sickly sweet.

"The fifth chair is being saved."

His tone was very cold. About as cold as I had ever heard it.

"I could join you until they show," she pressed. It wasn't even a question. It was more like a statement of fact.

_She_ didn't seem to have much sense of self-preservation, either. She had no idea how much she was toying with danger.

"No," Edward said flatly. Then his eyes shifted a little to the right. There was a definite ease in his tension.

"Sorry I'm late."

Alice! What the—?

"There was no room in your lunch bag for your cake!"

My shocked eyes left hers and dropped down to the plate she had set in front of me. There, on the fine china, was a huge slab of the cake that had been made for my welcome home party.

I heard a chair scrape the floor, and looked up to see Alice had taken a seat in it. She was all smiles.

Jessica almost slunk away from the table. Edward's eyes softened.

"Um, thanks," I muttered, a bit bewildered.

Edward brushed his finger across the back of my hand, which sort of woke me up from my daze, and then he proceeded to unbag my lunch from the brown paper with his neat pen on it.

"Oh, sorry, um, Angela, Eric, this is Alice. Edward's sister."

Alice gave each of them a slight nod. "Esme hopes you like the muffins," she said to Angela.

Angela seemed as shocked by all that had just happened as I was. She snapped out of it, though, when Alice gave a little head nod towards the still sealed muffin she had been absently poking at.

"Oh, yeah, thanks. I'm sure I will. I was telling Bella the other day, that your mom should open a bakery."

She was back to her happy self by the time she finished the sentence.

"Yes, Bella told us," Alice said brightly. "That made her day."

"Am I allowed to try these fabulous muffins?" Eric asked, his eyes shifting several times from the muffin to Angela and then back again. Angela laughed.

It was then that I finally looked up at Edward. He smiled, then dropped his gaze to the sandwich in front of me.

The conversations that followed were easy and fun. Alice did far more talking than Edward, but both of them were included by Angela and Eric effortlessly. Like the two Cullen siblings had been our friends for years.

I caught Jessica glaring a few times from across the room, but on the third time that I stole a peek, Edward touched my hand, which gained my attention instantly. When our eyes locked, he shook his head. He wanted me to ignore her. So I did, for the rest of the period.

I shared the piece of cake with both Angela and Eric, since it was far too much for me to finish on my own. The idea of wasting it felt like a crime. Eric became another proponent of Esme opening a bakery by the end of lunch.

"I'll see you at home!" Alice chirped when the bell rang. She looked like she was engaging in some kind of interpretive dance as she twirled herself out the door. Edward and I smiled at each other over that.

"Your sister is loads of fun!" Angela commented as we approached the tray stack near the trash cans.

"Yeah, thanks. I know."

I hid a grin. His casual dialect was improving.

Angela and Eric split off from us then. They were holding hands, and Angela smiled back at me as they walked away. It was so great to see them together, finally.

Edward placed the cake plate on the stack of trays as we passed. The cafeteria would be amassing a collection of Esme's dishes, too, it seemed. I didn't question it.

"Did you know she was coming?" I asked.

"Not exactly. I made the decision that I wanted her to."

He took my hand as we strolled out the door and headed for Biology.

Mr. Molina seemed to be the exception to my previous consideration. He didn't seem to dislike Edward at all. Though, in general, he was a very happy person. Maybe that made the difference.

"Ah, yes, Mr. Cullen. I heard you would be joining us today. Very good. But there are no idle hands in my classroom." He glanced over to where I usually sat next to Mike. "Mr. Newton, Mr. Cheney's lab partner is absent today. Why don't you join him this time, so Mr. Cullen and Miss Swan can be partners."

Partners? I almost choked on my own spit.

Mike seemed annoyed, but it appeared mostly due to the fact that he had to relocate.

"Just do your best to follow along," Mr. Molina instructed Edward.

He returned a polite smile and nod. "I'm sure I can keep up."

He led me to my desk – _our_ desk – pulled my chair out, waited for me to take a seat, and then joined me. My heart was racing. I'm not sure why. Maybe it was because I was sharing my world with him in such a unique way. Maybe it was because I was nervous that I would actually be working side-by-side with someone vastly more intelligent. Maybe it was because he was so near to me, I could almost feel the electricity flowing between us.

Or maybe it was a combination of all those things.

Onion roots. That explained the microscopes on the desks. They usually sat on the shelves by the door until we needed them.

"Onion root tip cells, that's what's on your slides right now. Okay? So, separate and label them into the phases of mitosis, and the first partners to get it right are going to win…" He jogged up to his desk, then proudly flourished a spray painted onion for the class to see. "The Golden Onion!"

He was always trying to make learning fun.

"Ladies first."

When I looked over at Edward, he smiled, then inched the microscope towards me.

Okay, appearing stupid was definitely one of the reasons why my heart had started racing. A new shot of adrenalin coursed through me as I brought the piece of equipment closer and set the first slide in place.

Prophase. I was sure of it. And yet I wasn't. I felt like an idiot under Edward's curious gaze.

"Prophase," I said, committing myself to the answer.

He smiled, then gestured towards the microscope. I knew what he was asking. He wanted to check for himself. I gestured back that he could.

He barely even glanced through the eyepiece. "Prophase," he repeated, smiling. Then he pulled the worksheet towards himself and filled in the first blank.

He seemed… _proud_ of me. That felt _good_. Like it had been since first meeting him, his approval meant something to me.

He removed the first slide, set the second one in place, then glanced through the eyepiece again.

"Anaphase." His eyes locked with mine as he pushed the microscope towards me. He wanted me to check his work.

Of course he was right. "Anaphase," I repeated.

He smiled again as he jotted the answer down on the second blank line of the worksheet.

Feeling a little more confident, I swapped out the slides and peered into the eyepiece. "Metaphase."

He didn't even look to see if I was right. He just wrote the answer down on the paper in his insanely neat pen.

We won the award – the next team took three times as long to finish – but I really didn't care about that. It was an annoying thing to carry, anyway. We stopped by my locker so I wouldn't have to, and so that I wouldn't stink up my backpack with the smells of onion and polyurethane.

Gym ended up being a lot better than I thought it would be. I had considered that I would make a fool of myself while Edward watched. Trip and fall. Get hit with the ball. Peg some unsuspecting kid as I tried to score a basket.

But none of that happened. Edward intervened. Again. He explained to the coach that I needed a day of rest, because of my illness the day before. The coach didn't even eye me or Edward suspiciously.

There really weren't any rules for what to do if you were sitting out of class. As long as you weren't disruptive and you stayed in the vicinity. Edward and I sat on the bleachers and read _Romeo and Juliet_ – the book we were assigned in English. Mr. Berty wasn't expecting us to actually start reading it until next week, but he was showing the film today in class.

We sat very close together, hips touching, his arm around me, his hand resting on my waist. I could barely concentrate. It was cozy, and exciting, and safe. I was actually disappointed when the bell rang.

Mr. Berty seemed a little annoyed by Edward's presence, but not on the same level that Mr. Jefferson and Mr. Varner exhibited. He just scoffed and gestured widely towards the stack of chairs in the back of the room.

Whenever we watched a movie in class, we were allowed to change the seating around to accommodate being able to see the tiny TV screen. Edward and I sat together at the back of the class. And held hands. I had never been less interested in a movie in all my life.

The electricity running through us was _strong_. At least it was for me. I had to wonder if he felt it in the same way I did, with the same intensity. Maybe he was even in control of it. It wouldn't have surprised me if he was.

Jessica stalked us all the way to his car after school. Even Angela noticed. We met up with her halfway to the parking lot because she was headed in the same direction.

"Jessica has lost her mind," she whispered to me after glancing behind her for the second time.

"You can't lose what you never had," I joked. Okay, it was a mean shot, but I couldn't help but smile when Angela laughed.

"I would uninvite her for tomorrow, but I don't want to stoop to her level of rudeness."

I agreed with her there. "Maybe Mike will keep her occupied. I think he has a crush on her."

Edward's hand tightened around mine. I didn't have time to wonder why for long.

"Possibly, but maybe we should think twice about inviting her on future trips. I don't want to be mean and exclude her, but her behavior lately is a little… odd." She was set to split up from us then, to go to her car. "I guess we can see how things go tomorrow."

"Yeah." And wow.

How had it come to this? While Angela and I had always minimized our socialization with Jessica, she was still considered a member of our group, especially when we would do dinner and movie nights. Now, because of her weird obsession with the Cullens, she was in danger of being excluded?

"I'll see you tomorrow."

I shook those thoughts from my brain and hugged Angela back, then Edward and I approached his car.

He was driving, apparently, because he opened the passenger door for me. As soon as he slipped into his seat, he asked, "What are you thinking?"

I would have to word things carefully. I didn't want him to think he was somehow at fault for how things were. "Jessica. Weird, how she's been acting."

I wasn't asking for him to tell me why she was. Maybe he realized that, because he didn't. I changed the subject.

"I had fun with you today."

He smiled. I took that to mean he had fun, too. Then he offered me his hand. I loved it when he did that. He didn't _grab_ my hand, he _offered_ it. Like it was my decision whether or not to take it. It was yet another gentlemanly thing that made him so special.

Esme was already cooking dinner when we got to his house. It smelled amazing, but since I was still full from lunch, my stomach didn't growl.

When Edward moved to help me with my jacket, to take it off, I stopped him. We had time before dinner, I knew.

"I was wondering something." He quirked his eyebrow, and I couldn't help but grin. "Can we take another trip?"

"Yes. Where would you like to go?"

"I really didn't get a chance to enjoy the view last night," I answered. "It was too dark to see."

He smirked. "Frail little human eyes," he teased.

My grin widened. "Is that a yes?"

His smirk then turned mischievous. He dropped my backpack on the bench, then slung me up onto his back. Before I could even blink twice, we were through his room, out the window wall, and clinging to the tree just outside.

The trip was even more amazing in the daylight. A little bit scary, but I was starting to acclimate to the experience, it seemed. To the blur of color. To the rush of wind. To the sensation that we were about to smack into something at any second. I now knew we wouldn't. He had lightening fast reflexes.

I trusted him unconditionally.

He helped me off his back, and then onto a branch so I could sit. There was never a moment when he let go of me.

And I was right. The view was spectacular. It reminded me of visions I'd had when listening to him play his compositions.

"Do you come here often?" I asked.

"Occasionally."

"Has this particular spot ever inspired your music?"

His curiosity seemed to pique. "Yes."

I nodded. It didn't surprise me. "Which song? Or songs?"

When he started to hum it, I recognized it instantly. It was the very song that, when he played it, brought visions to my mind that were very much like the scene I was viewing. Mountains in the distance, river nearby, trees all around.

My right hand was gripping the branch just above my head for balance, while his left was ducked under my arm and lying flat against my back. Then I felt it slide upwards.

He started playing with my hair, twirling it around his fingers as I had done with the blades of grass when we were in the meadow. Such a simple thing, but it made my heart rate soar.

"Will you share your thoughts with me?"

I could barely think, let alone speak. His touch was gentle but exciting. His eyes were intense but adoring. He was luring me again.

I shook my head. It was all I _could_ do. His smile in response caused my breathing to turn erratic.

And then a thought occurred to me. It found its way through the haze of my mind and sobered me slightly. I was miles above the ground, feeling completely unstable due to Drug Edward's affect on me.

"I'll die if I fall."

He started to lean in a little, and I found myself being pulled towards him by some unseen force. "You won't fall, Bella. I won't let that happen."

'Soon' was sooner than I thought. When I realized what he was doing, I froze.

Stay very still. Stay very still. Stay very still.

And once again, the anticipation was unreal. But knowing what I knew, I wasn't about to make things any harder on him. I needed to wait for _him_ to bridge the gap. I needed to wait for _his_ lips to touch mine.

_Stay. Very. Still._

I couldn't watch. I couldn't bear to see the expression of severe concentration on his face, knowing it was, in part, due to pain.

I could feel his breath. His nose brushed mine. And then finally, our lips met. The first kiss was brief. Experimental. But the second kiss…

I didn't know anything could be that perfect. His lips were harder than mine, but softer than I remembered. He kissed both of my lips separately and together. He kissed the corners of my mouth. The hand that had been playing with my hair was suddenly up in it, cradling my head.

It never became frenzied, but that didn't make it any less passionate. He was _adoring_ me.

I never moved. I only followed his lead. I didn't want the perfect moment to stop.

My head was spinning yet lucid, all at the same time. My heart was racing, but in a stable, steady rhythm. My lips adapted to his every move.

To stop myself from touching him, my right hand death-gripped the tree branch above my head, and my left dug into my thigh. I began to tremble from the effort.

An eternity later, I felt his lips leave me and his forehead touch mine.

"My dearest Bella…" He sounded winded as he whispered. "You are my life now."

Good thing he had a hold of me. I would have fallen out of the tree to my death if he hadn't.

How does one respond to something like that? I was his _life_ now. The feeling was mutual.

After only eight days, I knew beyond any doubt that I would want for no one else, ever in my life.

It would be tricky as I got older, but we could work something out. Maybe people would think I was robbing the cradle, but it didn't matter if they did. I would know the truth. He was, and would always be, way older than I am, even though he wouldn't appear so outwardly.

Maybe people would think he was my son. Or, later, grandson. We could find a secluded area to live in. Limit our physical contact while out in public. What we did behind closed doors wasn't anyone else's business anyway.

My friends and parents might start to wonder, though. Why he didn't appear to be aging. At first, we could just play it off that he holds his age well. But that would only last for so long. We could say he was too sick for social gatherings at some point, but even that would draw attention after a few years.

Maybe we could use makeup or something. They made Tyler look like he was eighty in that play last year. But, then again, it only looked believable at a distance. Close up, it looked like he was wearing makeup. Could makeup even adhere to vampire skin?

Maybe we could even use his rumored skin condition in some way.

Whatever the solution, or solutions, we would find a way. I was his _life_ now, and he was mine.

And I had yet to acknowledge his words. I had just drifted off into thought.

"You're my life now, too," I whispered. Choked out, really. I sounded just as winded as he had.

This obviously pleased him. He tilted his head up to kiss my forehead, and then his lips were all over my face. My cheeks, my chin, the tip of my nose. Then he kissed a path towards my neck.

"Don't be afraid," he whispered.

I wasn't. How could I be?

I could feel his nose caressing my skin. Feel his cool breath. Hear his deep inhales. He was smelling me. He was _tasting_ me. Maybe I was like a drug to him, like he was to me. That was a heady thought.

I fought to remain conscious.

His lips, feather soft against me, dragged slowly upwards, and then he was nuzzling my hair just behind my ear.

I reminded myself to breathe.

The descent took place one slow, gentle kiss at a time.

Staying very still wasn't possible any longer. I reached out, fisted the material of his shirt at his waist, and then attempted to pull him in my direction. He didn't budge in the slightest. I may as well have been trying to push a six ton boulder up a steep mountain.

I could feel his smile against my skin.

Right at the spot where my racing pulse felt especially strong, his kisses changed. They were deeper. Penetrating. His lips were parted slightly. I could feel his tongue flicking across my skin, wetting it.

And then I felt his teeth.

The next thing I knew, I was lying on the ground, amongst the bracken, staring up at Edward.

He was lying next to me, propped up on his elbow, my body gathered against him.

Okay, this was getting ridiculous. I had blacked out again!

Edward looked like he was in the absolute fires of hell. I lifted my hand, shakily, and cupped his face.

"I'm okay," I promised him.

His anguish intensified.

I _was_ alright, wasn't I? I took a quick mental assessment.

Yeah, I was alright.

"What's wrong?" I asked. Maybe I was missing something.

"My sick and twisted desires should not be fulfilled at your expense."

Huh? "What sick and twisted desires?"

His eyes left mine, and then he dropped his head in… Shame? Yeah. He was feeling ashamed.

"Please tell me?" I asked.

He released a pained scoffing sound. "I would never hurt you..."

"I know that."

"But the desire to—"

He stopped his explanation abruptly, but enough was said that I could piece it together.

"You have a desire to hurt me?"

The most heartwrenching expression flashed onto his face. That was a yes.

"No."

Or maybe not. "I'm confused."

He took forever to answer. I knew he was going to, so I traced the features of his face while I waited. That seemed to ease his suffering slightly.

"Your scent is like a drug to me. I have never wanted a human's blood so much in my life."

Okay, two things…

First, I _was_ like a drug to him, like he was to me.

And second… Well, there was a part of him – and I wasn't exactly sure how dominant that part of him was – that thirsted for my blood. Beyond what would be considered normal for a being of his kind.

"Are you afraid?"

Okay, truthfully, I was a little unnerved by the thought of that, but I wouldn't have really categorized it as 'afraid'. I was more concerned about what that must feel like to _him_. We really were like the lion and the lamb. And not just that, but the lion had been starved to the brink of death, and the lamb was the last morsel of food in existence.

The lion would refuse to eat the lamb, simply because he was in love with her, and would then subsequently live in agony.

It made my guilt soar.

"No. I'm not afraid of you. I'm sorry."

"You're sorry for not being afraid?" he asked. His expression changed to confusion.

"No. I'm sorry that you're going through this. I wish there was a way I could fix it." And then a thought occurred to me. "What if I were to… I don't know, cut my finger, and then you could—?"

"No!"

That was obviously a very bad suggestion. I flinched when he yelled.

He noticed, of course. He sighed as he pulled me tighter against him. Protectively.

"I'm sorry for raising my voice." He sighed again. Heavily. "Bella, I can never allow myself that. Do you remember what I said to you, when explaining the difficulty Carlisle faced when changing me?"

It took a second to access the memory.

"_When we taste human blood, a sort of frenzy begins. It's almost impossible to stop."_

Oh. If he even just tasted my blood…

"Yeah. Okay. I see your point."

"I would never hurt you, Bella, but I must be cautious. I can never lose control with you."

"You won't. I trust you."

He laughed as he flattened himself to the forest floor. "Yes. I know. Fragile, trusting little human."

I shifted up onto my elbow and smiled down on him. It was good to hear him laugh, even if it was a little bit at my expense.

"Unbreakable, self-loathing little vampire," I teased back.

That really got him laughing. The sound of it gave me a newfound ounce of courage.

I kissed the tip of my finger, then placed it to his lips for a moment before tracing along them. He liked that. His laughter died, his smile eased, and then his expression changed. It was like this sexy, smoldering kind of thing that instantly set me on fire.

I was being lured. Invited. I was being given permission.

I leaned in and touched my lips to his, tentatively.

I learned something about myself in that moment. I have little sense of self control. I mimicked his earlier attentions – I wasn't exactly sure what to do beyond that – but then as the kiss became passionate, I found myself climbing on top of him. Straddling him.

Then we were sitting up, me in his lap, and things became frenzied. Desperate.

Our hands were in each other's hair. Grabbing. Fisting. Tugging.

Our kissing was no longer gentle. It was almost bruising, though it wasn't at all painful.

Our bodies were pressed together as much as could be possible, and yet I still wanted to be closer.

And then suddenly, there was distance.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

I really want to thank everyone for the encouragement, not only with this story, but with my struggles to quit smoking. It's been nine days since my last cigarette, and three since I ran out of patches. The last three days have been the hardest.

Okay, chapter not beta-ed, blah, blah, blah.

Now, Bella might seem a bit more OOC than usual in this chapter, with her reasoning that as she gets older, they could just hide away, and who cares if people think she's robbing the cradle…

Just wait. She is far from the journey's end at this point. Everything she thinks and feels is explained as the story progresses, I promise.

Now that it's obvious that I'm planning to show their physical/sexual relationship as well, I'd like to mention that I have kept the content of that on a PG-13 rating level throughout the fic. Hopefully, it's descriptive enough to satisfy those who enjoy such scenes, but carefully vague enough so that it won't offend people who don't.

I babble a lot. Sorry.

Anyway… please review, and MTLBYAKY


	22. Chapter 22

**Two Weeks**

ChapterTwenty-Two

By: Jana~

**XXX**

Our lips separated. Our bodies did, too.

Edward had taken me by the waist and pushed me, gently, just a little, away from him.

"I'm sorry."

And I was. I had caused him pain again. It was written all over his face.

"Don't be. I only need a moment."

That was a little encouraging, though his expression still had me concerned.

"Now I'm afraid."

Horror mixed with his anguish.

Shit! I hadn't meant to say that out loud!

"I'm not afraid of you," I added quickly. "I'm afraid of the pain I'm causing you. I'm afraid of losing you because of it."

His hand slipped into my hair, but it was consoling rather than exciting.

"Bella, do you not understand my feelings for you? You will _never_ lose me. I will _never_ leave you, unless you order me away."

"But, the pain—"

"Is manageable. And temporary. Acclimation," he added, then a slight smile tugged at his lips.

Okay, so, essentially, the only way to get him past the pain was to put him in pain in the first place. Adding to it a little at a time until it vanished altogether. Or at least decreased to an inconsequential level.

That probably should have eased my conscience, but it didn't. Inflicting pain on someone you love just by existing is not an easy thing to reconcile.

"Is there anything I can do to make it… _more_ manageable?"

He gathered me to him then, and I melted. "No. I only request your patience."

I could of course give him that, but it seemed too little to give. I wanted to _help_ him.

But then those thoughts flew out of my head as I felt his hands slide up my back. He was grasping at me, almost urgently, like he was starving for the physical contact. I could understand that. It felt like that to me, too.

I returned the embrace just as desperately, but that was all we did. For hours, it seemed, until my stomach growled.

"You need to eat."

I did, but I didn't want to leave. It felt too good being in his arms. In his lap. Still straddling him.

"A few minutes more?" I asked.

I heard him chuckle, and then he pulled away from me. Just enough so that he could initiate eye contact.

"My family will be leaving for a while tonight. Carlisle will be at the hospital. Esme and my siblings are going… out."

He hesitated before the word 'out', and a slight shift in his smile happened when he said it. Translated: My family is going hunting.

And the implication was clear. We would get alone time later. In his room. In his bed. My heart started racing over the possibilities.

I nodded, then allowed him to help me up off his lap, off the ground. We were flying towards his house less than a minute later.

I was starting to get a better sense of Alice, too, it seemed. She joined me and Edward while I ate, happy and chatting about what had happened at school earlier. She liked Angela, too. And I was of the distinct impression she felt the same way about Jessica that Edward did. The two siblings shared odd looks a few times whenever she was brought up.

I considered asking her about it, but decided against it. If it was important, I was sure she would share with me.

Then, as I was finishing up my meal of sweet and sour vegetables with wok-fried lomein noodles, when Alice mentioned her needing to leave in a bit, I caught her winking at Edward. His expression didn't change in response, but the gesture left me with little doubt. Alice knew something.

My initial thought was that I should be unnerved by her ability to _see_ things. The moment Edward or I decided on anything, she would be able to see it play out before we even did it. She probably saw our first kiss before it happened. And our second kiss.

What had she seen about tonight, that would prompt her to wink at Edward like she had? It made me nervous to think about, so I pushed the thought from my mind.

"I think I'll shower early tonight," I mentioned as I cleared my place at the table. "Get it over with," I added. I was trying to sound casual, but I was sure I had failed in the attempt.

I wanted to get my shower out of the way for two reasons.

First, I felt like I had half the forest in my hair. I brushed it out twice before dinner, but some of the debris refused to dislodge.

And second, I wanted uninterrupted alone time with Edward, until I fell asleep in his arms.

As I raced through my getting ready for bed routine, I noticed that my nightclothes smelled freshly laundered. I could only assume Esme had washed them for me. I would have to make a point to thank her for all she had done for me during my stay. She was very mothering to me, more so than my own mom on some levels.

From the time I was old enough to reach the washing machine, I was laundering my own clothes.

I was nervous as I walked the hall towards Edward's room. I tried to listen for sounds downstairs, but with my frail human hearing, I couldn't be sure if anyone was still in the house or not. When did vampires usually go hunting?

I entered the room to find Edward, on the bed, just off the center to his left, sitting cross-legged and reading a book. His focus remained on the pages, but a tiny smile showed itself. He knew I was there – obviously; he probably heard me the moment I exited the shower – but he didn't draw attention to the fact.

I tossed my toiletry bag and dirty clothes next to my suitcase before plopping down on the edge of the bed. My back was to him, but I knew he had finally looked up from his book and was watching me. I could feel his eyes on me.

I wasn't sure what to do. It's one thing to have stuff just kind of spontaneously happen, it's another when trying to figure out how to start it off.

"Will you join me?"

I took in a steadying breath, gave a nod, then pushed myself to right beside him. Then I crossed my legs, imitating his stance, and stared blankly at the bedspread.

"What are you reading?" I asked. It was a lame question, really, but I had to find a breaking in point.

He moved it into my line of sight.

"_Wuthering Heights_?"

When I finally looked up at him, I saw that he was smiling.

"I hope you don't mind that I borrowed it."

Of course I didn't mind. His smile was so amazing right then, I would have signed it for him, too. Though why he would want my signature on a book I didn't write made no sense.

I shook my head. "Where are you at?"

"I finished it a while ago. I was just rereading the pages that have these little creases up in the corners."

He flicked at one of the dog-eared pages, then closed the book and set it aside.

"Do these pages include your favorite passages, or were you merely marking your place?"

"Both, I guess," I said with a shrug.

I wanted to find a machete and hack through the tension, it was _that_ thick. This was not how I imagined our alone time would go. Actually, I didn't exactly have an image, but I didn't think it would be quite so awkward.

He sensed it, too. He wrapped his arms around my waist, clasped his hands, then settled his chin on my shoulder.

"What are you thinking?"

I couldn't tell him I was nervous. It felt like a ridiculous thing to be, and admitting to it was sure to be mortifying. I scrambled for any other thought. "Does Alice have visions about things we do together?"

A pointless question, really. I already knew the answer.

"Yes. Does that bother you?"

"No. Not really." Maybe it should have, but it really didn't. "It just takes some getting used to. She seems happy for us. Like she wanted this for us all along—" I startled. Hard. Puzzle pieces clicked into place in rapid succession. "Alice saw all of this coming, didn't she?"

Another pointless question. She had been playing matchmaker since day one.

"Yes."

The seriousness of his tone when he answered made me want to reanalyze everything, from the moment I had first set eyes on him until three seconds ago.

If _she_ knew, _he_ knew.

"What did she see exactly?"

"It would be difficult to remember those earlier visions now. Decisions have been made throughout the last eight days."

That made sense, since her visions were based off decisions. "Did she see us… as we are now? In a— In a… relationship?"

Why was it so hard to say the word? We _were_ in a relationship.

"Yes."

"And what did _you_ think of that?"

Was he freaked? Disbelieving? How weird was that for him, to see himself in a relationship with someone he hadn't even met yet?

Between the time I had asked the question and the time he answered, the seconds dragged on like hours.

"I was nervous to meet the woman I had waited my entire existence for."

My heart shuddered into a faster pace. "When did she have the first vision?"

He tightened his hold on me a little. Consolingly. "When Carlisle agreed to examine Waylon's body. The visions became clearer when the decision was made that you should stay with us while your parents were out of town."

"How was that decision even made? I mean, to have me stay here instead of, say, with Angela? I didn't know our dads were that close of friends."

"Carlisle was there when Charlie made the call to the Forge family. Charlie was trying to decide what would be best for you. Carlisle offered."

"Not that I'm not grateful, but _why_ did your dad offer?"

He hesitated. "To allow your father some peace of mind while he grieved."

Yeah, there was more to it than that. "Edward?" I pitched my tone just right so that he would know I was calling him on it. He sighed in resignation.

"The nomads were still in the area at that time. I needed you to be where I could protect you."

I felt honored and humbled, all at once. Before I had even learned his name, this man cared for me. He had assigned himself as my keeper and great protector, all because of a dreamlike thought that wasn't even his.

A dreamlike thought that… "What was Alice's vision about tonight?" I asked suddenly. "I saw her wink at you."

I heard the faintest hint of a chuckle.

"Would you prefer I tell you, or show you?"

Oh, God. Neither would stop my racing heart, I was sure of that. If anything, the forewarning might actually make me _more_ nervous.

I didn't answer him. I just shifted a little and stared up into his amazingly intense eyes. They were doing that smoldering thing again. Captivating me. Luring me.

I only realized it after I felt the bed beneath my back… he had guided me down with him.

He unclasped his hands from around my waist, then used his right to support his head at the temple as he propped himself up on his elbow. His left was resting on my hip. Not just resting, but caressing. It was an almost imperceptible movement, but I was so hyperaware of him then, I could feel every adjustment in touch.

His thumb brushed back and forth along the material of my pants. His fingers increased and decreased the applied pressure. His breathing was slow and rhythmic.

He was calming me down again.

And then we just stared at each other. Minutes were like decades.

"You fascinate me, Bella."

Any sense of calm I had started to feel flew out the window. He smiled at me apologetically, then fell silent.

But I wanted him to explain. "In what way?" I asked.

"In every way. I think it might take a lifetime to figure you out."

I hoped it would. He might be more apt to stay with me if I remained a mystery to him.

"You might need more than a lifetime, actually."

He hummed in response, and I instantly forgot what we were talking about. And then I forgot everything else. My name. His name. The year. Where I lived.

He left a trail of fiery cold kisses from my temple to my lips, effectively turning me into a flammable liquid again. What followed, I could only describe as a controlled franticness.

Hands were everywhere, except for anywhere that might be considered inappropriate. It seemed he was being very careful of that. Anytime he would come close to touching me in certain areas, his hand would slide away.

"Ed—Edward, please."

Okay, I guess I did remember his name, but it was a struggle to articulate.

And pleading with him had the exact opposite of the desired effect. He kissed my lips one last time, then settled his forehead against mine. His hands came to a stop, his left taking up residence on my hip again.

"I'm sorry, Bella."

So was I, but not for the same reason, it seemed.

"I wasn't asking you to stop," I whispered.

"I know."

He needed more time to acclimate, I realized. I ran my fingers through his hair at the nape of his neck, soothingly, letting him know in that way that I understood.

Or maybe I didn't.

"You're so frail, Bella."

Okay. How did we get back on that subject again? "So you keep saying."

A sad, frustrated sigh escaped him. "You don't understand."

I honestly didn't. There was obviously a problem of some kind, but I had no idea what it was. "Then explain it to me," I asked of him.

He took a dozen years to answer. "You excite me, Bella. I would never intentionally hurt you, but intentions mean little when one isn't thinking clearly."

All considerations of any supposed problem flew out of my head. I _excited_ him!

"You deserve every human experience, but this is one I just can't risk offering you."

Wait. What? Ever? I crashed back to reality fast. "You mean, we might not ever be able to...?"

He sighed again. It sounded even more heartwrenching than before. "I'm sorry. I can't be sure that I can control myself."

I was. I was sure he could, but my confidence in that aside…

He was far too protective of me to take the chance. And I certainly wasn't about to force him to _be_ with me if he didn't want to be.

I fought to hide my disappointment. After all, I had considered that as a possibility. For different reasons, but still, the thought had crossed my mind that we might at least be limited in what we could do intimately.

Maybe in time…

But we could worry about that later.

"I'm still here," I whispered. And I meant that in every sense. I wasn't going anywhere, even if our relationship could never take _that_ step forward. What we had was far too special to throw away.

He seemed both relieved and in agony, which just proved my previous assumption. He was capable of feeling many different emotions all at once.

"I'm not being fair to you, Bella. You deserve better than what I can give."

"Edward…" I sighed as I considered my words. "What you give me is more than you know. More than I could find anywhere else. Until _you_ order _me_ away, I'm staying."

"I'm too selfish to order you away."

"You're not being selfish," I insisted. "Or if you are, then so am I. We belong together, Edward. Maybe this is Mother Nature's idea of a joke, but we do."

And then my anxieties prickled and my insecurities niggled. I knew he cared for me, but until I heard it from him directly, my heart demanded I protect it. "At least it seems that way to me," I added.

A new form of pain settled into his expression then. There were no words to describe it. I wasn't even sure how to respond to it. So I just stroked his cheek.

He took my hand by the wrist, kissed my palm, then gathered me tightly to him. That alone told me all I needed to know. He loved me.

Mother Nature had a sick sense of humor, but the joke was on her. We would find a way. I was sure of it.

As I confidently mulled that thought over, a new one edged in. Alice's vision came to my mind once again. Had she seen that this was how our evening would go? If so, then why did she wink?

I had to ask. It was gnawing at me. "What was Alice's vision of tonight exactly?"

He kissed my hair before answering. "A decision was made that she did not foresee."

She had seen a different turn of events. He had changed his mind. That was a little disheartening.

"So, you were planning to…? But you changed your mind…? While…?"

"I'm so sorry. There was no way to know for certain."

Hello, I'm Bella Swan, and I'm a guinea pig. I couldn't be too upset about it, though. At least he tried. And his fear of hurting me wasn't the only obstacle he had faced when doing so.

Even a slight amount of intimacy with me caused him actual, physical pain. He might be able to acclimate eventually, but I doubted he had already. I couldn't even imagine the confliction he was going through.

We would stick with safe expressions of feelings for now. Forever, if need be. I settled in comfortably against his cool chest.

"You don't need to be sorry, Edward. I'm not. As long as you're in my life, I will never be sorry."

He held me tighter. "I only want for your happiness, Bella." He had said that to me once before, but then he added, "And I promise you, I will strive, every moment of the rest of your life, to give you that happiness, in any way that I can."

I almost began trembling. After knowing Edward for only eight days, we had just essentially committed ourselves to spending the rest of my life with each other.

Maybe I was crazy – maybe he was, too – but I didn't care. Nothing had ever felt so right in my life.

"Could you start by getting me a glass of water?"

Okay, stupid timing for a joke, but I had to do it. Not only was I dying of thirst – panting tends to do that – but I needed a break from the intensity.

I didn't hear him chuckle so much as feel it. He kissed my hair, and then he was gone. When he returned less than a minute later, instead of rejoining me, he extended his hand.

He led me over to the window wall, opened it, then encouraged me to sit with him at the ledge. Once we were settled, he handed me my glass of water.

"Thanks." I downed it in three long gulps before setting the glass aside.

It was a gorgeous night. Just the slightest chill in the air, and the moon shone in streams of light through the patches in the clouds.

I felt his arm slip around me, and then his hand came to rest on my waist as I snuggled against his side. I was so content, I almost zoned out.

"What are you thinking?"

I cracked a smile. "Sometimes, I wish you _could_ read my mind. I know how frustrating it is for you that you can't."

"Only sometimes?"

I nodded, stalling for time so that I could decide how best to explain without embarrassing myself.

"My thoughts would probably annoy you after a while. I tend to over think things." Not to mention, as of late, they were almost constantly about _him_.

He was already too aware of my feelings. Of what he did to me just by being near me. For him to have free access to my brain...

"I doubt that, Bella. You could never annoy me."

I shrugged. "Maybe. But I'd rather not test the theory."

"You're afraid that my feelings for you would change, if I could read your mind?"

A little bit. I shrugged again.

"Bella, I love everything about you. My feelings for you will never change."

My body exploded with emotion. I almost started crying from the intensity of it.

Climbing into his lap, straddling him, I hid my face against his neck. I had to hide. I couldn't look at him when I said what I was about to say.

"I'm in love with you, Edward."

"I know," he whispered. There was a consoling quality to his tone, like he knew how hard that was for me to admit. "Angela remembers your conversation with her fondly. She is excited about being your Maid of Honor."

Oh, God. My heart threatened to kill me, the adrenalin was so extreme. He might not be able to read _my_ thoughts, but he could read everyone else's. Why hadn't I thought of that? I knew it, but didn't connect the dots before opening my big mouth.

"I'm sorry for invading your privacy. It's not something I can turn off."

I nodded against him. It wasn't him who I was upset with. It was me. I would have to be careful of what I said to people in the future.

"Are you angry with me?"

Still hiding my face from him, I shook my head. "I'm just embarrassed."

"Please, don't be. I could barely contain my joy when learning that."

Apparently, kissing wasn't on the list of human experiences he felt he couldn't offer me.

His hand slid into my hair, prompting me to pull back enough to lock eyes with him. I could literally see the joy he had referred to, which made my heart race even faster than it had been. Then he leaned in, slowly, and touched his lips to mine.

It wasn't frantic. It was tender. Gentle. Adoring.

And he didn't seem to be in pain. Or at least not as much as before.

I forced myself to remain in control.

It was funny, in a non-humorous kind of way… he spoke of how he could never allow himself to lose control with me, yet it seemed I had a bigger problem with that than he did. Of course, if _I_ were to lose control, it wouldn't injure or kill him.

As he stood from off the ground, in that effortless way that proved just how strong he was, he continued kissing me. I clung to him, my arms tighter around his neck, my legs wrapping around his waist.

I had a vague sense that he was pulling the blankets down, but didn't truly understand what was happening until I was flat on my back, on the bed, and he was tucking us both in.

Turning on my side, I inched closer him. And then he just stared at me for the longest time, as he brushed my hair back behind my ear.

He was breathing rhythmically again, but I didn't know why. I wasn't in need of calming. Or at least I didn't think I was. I seemed to be in some control of it, anyway. But then the reason why he was became clear.

"I love you, Bella."

It was an anticipatory move. He knew saying that to me would cause me to go into emotional overload.

He was right, but his preventative measures didn't help. My body went into self destruct mode. My lungs hurt and my head spun from the lack of oxygen. My heart sputtered about in an insanely fast and irregular rhythm. The blood in my body burned like fire.

I knew he loved me – or at least a part of me did – but to hear him actually say it…

"Bella, breathe."

When I finally did, it was erratic. I couldn't seem to regulate it, even with him attempting to guide me. The worry in his expression intensified.

I wanted to reassure him that I was okay, but I wasn't so certain that I was, and the ability to form words was lost.

It was only after he started humming my lullaby, after I began to calm down a little, that I realized I was also shaking.

I felt like the most pathetic person on the planet. These reactions couldn't possibly be normal, if couples in love in books and movies were any indication. Elinor Dashwood didn't react this way to Edward Ferrars in _Sense and Sensibility_, though in the movie version, she did have something of a panic attack when he told her that he hadn't gotten married to Lucy Steele. Funny that his name was Edward, too.

But _that_ Edward wasn't a vampire. Maybe that was the difference. Everything seemed to be more intense with _my_ Edward. The way he looked at me. His voice. When just holding his hand, it felt like my entire world was changing around me.

"It frightens me when you forget to breathe," he whispered. It brought me out of my thoughts and haze. "Did I upset you?"

"No," I said. My voice was shaky and distant. "I'm not upset." Just the opposite, but finding a way to explain that seemed an impossible task. Or maybe I could just say that. "I'm the opposite of upset."

That was explanation enough, apparently. His smile was both amused and relieved.

We barely spoke after that. We just stared at each other. I knew when his family had come home, but only because I heard the TV go on. Emmett laughed at something once or twice; Edward smirked slightly when he did. I didn't ask him what was so funny. By then, I was starting to feel sleepy.

I finally allowed my heavy lids to close.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

Not Beta-ed.

Thanks so much for all the wonderful reviews! I'm glad everyone is continuing to enjoy the story. And thanks for having faith in me that Bella won't be too OOC by the end of this.

There are a few loyal reviewers I wish to thank…

ADarnell, SpunkyBookworm, jujubakiller, GoldenBeliever, Kristin04… and so many more of you who have consistently reviewed, letting me know that you're reading and enjoying. Your encouragement means a lot to me. Sincerely.

And, Brookieo… LOL! I adore you, kiddo! You always bring a smile to my face! Just FYI, but I'm 39 years old, I have written 'erotica' before (my novels are not, but they do have scenes above a PG-13 rating), I don't 'swing that way' but have zero issues with people swinging any which way they choose to, and where did you find the 'comma splice' in chapter twenty? To be fair, my beta had red marked the crap out of my excessive commas in that chapter, but I don't always take her advice if I think the comma looks good or seems right.

As for all the kissing scenes… I can tell you, their physical relationship is explored. A lot. Do they spend entire chapters doing nothing but kissing? No. But there are a lot of intimate scenes and moments throughout, until the very end. Hopefully, I've managed a good ratio of plot to romance.

And for those who have asked… MTLBYAKY = May The Lord Bless You And Keep You

I'm excited to share the next three chapters. Date night, but something significant happens before date night. I'm interested to see what people think. (smile)

Please keep the love and reviews coming! And MTLBYAKY

P.S. I'm still not smoking, even though I'd like to pull my own arm off and beat myself to death with it. (grin)


	23. Chapter 23

**Two Weeks**

ChapterTwenty-Three

By: Jana~

**XXX**

Edward's humming found its way into my dreams, waking me gently from my sleep.

I snuggled in deeper against him, sighing contentedly. But then I remembered what day it was.

Friday. Date night was upon us. I was both excited and nervous, which caused my heart to sputter.

"What's wrong?"

Deciding to be honest, but careful, I answered, "I guess I'm just wondering how tonight is going to go."

He started stroking my hair, comfortingly. "Bella, love, please don't worry."

It was hard not to. "You said that Alice has seen that everything will be okay?"

"Yes."

He hesitated before answering. My nerves prickled. "Is there something you're not telling me?"

I didn't want to accuse him of anything, but my instincts were telling me that he was holding something back from me.

"Yes."

I was surprised by that. I honestly expected him to say no.

"But you needn't be concerned about it. It's nothing I can't handle."

"But, if you would just tell me—"

"No," he interrupted. "I'm asking you to trust me."

I did trust him. With my life. Literally. I conceded by dropping it. "You can't stay with me again at school today, can you?"

"No. There would be no logical reason to, as far as the school administration is concerned."

That was disappointing. I had enjoyed him being there. It made me wish he attended school with me.

"Will I see you at lunch?"

"Yes. In the cafeteria."

Jessica. She was still planning to follow me, if I went to the forest. I was starting to wonder if we'd ever get to go back there again.

"You'll hate me if I ask to ditch today, won't you?"

He chuckled. "I could never hate you. But you _are_ going to school today," he added. Sternly.

I rolled my eyes, then lifted my head so that I could stare down on him. He was smirking.

"One missed day is no big deal. You do realize I have perfect grades, right? Well, except for Gym," I added. "There are only so many times they allow you to almost kill other students before they knock your grade down a point."

I grinned when he laughed again.

"The children in your class were grateful that you were excused from participating the last few days."

That didn't surprise me. "Yeah, well, I don't think they'll be so lucky today. I'm out of excuses for not playing."

He gave a nod, then he ran his fingers up into my hair. My breath caught, but I was able to get it back into rhythm quickly. When he pulled me to him, gently, I nearly collapsed into the kiss that followed.

It was brief, but perfect as always. And then he chuckled.

"Alice wants to speak with me. Your breakfast is almost ready. I will meet you down at the car."

I literally groaned with disappointment. I wanted to kiss him for longer. He smiled, then allowed me one last brushing of our lips before shifting out from under me. I watched him walk away before forcing myself to get up and face the day.

Esme was just finishing up setting my place at the counter when I entered the kitchen. She smiled at me warmly, like she always did, but then she did something she didn't usually. She joined me.

"Did you sleep well?"

I really liked Esme – well, all of the Cullens, really – but I suddenly felt awkward. Maybe it was because I hadn't really conversed with her much. Maybe it was because I knew she knew that Edward and I were now in a relationship.

This was his mother. Maybe not in the strictest sense of the word, but still. She seemed approving of me, but how odd was it for her really, that this plain, _human_ girl was in love with her son?

"I did. Thanks. How was… your evening?"

I wasn't sure how to phrase the question. Maybe all of the Cullens had the same concerns about discussing their hunting activities.

Her smile widened. Or maybe not.

"It was fine. Thank you for asking."

I gave a nervous nod, then sunk my fork into my breakfast. Waffles again, but this time, it had some kind of cherry glaze instead of raspberry sauce.

"I want to thank you for all you've done for me," I said after swallowing. I waited to take another bite. "The meals… your hospitality… I really feel at home here."

"I'm very pleased to hear that. We've enjoyed having you."

I got the impression she wanted to say something to me. There was something in her eyes, maybe. Or in her tone. Like she was just trying to figure out how to broach the subject. It made me more nervous than I was before.

I smiled at her, then went back to my breakfast. She watched me for the longest time – I had almost finished what I could eat of the enormous waffle – before she finally spoke up.

"We've never seen Edward this happy."

I had to force the chewed bite down my throat. I couldn't think of a way to respond to that. I set my fork down and stared at my plate.

"I don't mean to make you uncomfortable."

She sounded truly remorseful. I shook my head. "I'm not. It's just… this situation is a little… unusual. For me. I know you guys know what's going on. Everything. Because of your hearing, and because of Alice."

I saw the movement out of my peripheral vision, and then I felt her cold hand on top of mine. It was a consoling gesture. Very mothering. I had to wonder if Esme could control moods like Jasper could. I suddenly, instantly, felt better. Relaxed. Not at all nervous.

I smiled up at her.

"We want you to know that you are always welcome here."

I believed her without question. I could _feel_ the sincerity. Her acceptance of me, not just in her home, but in her son's life.

"Edward is waiting for you now," she said as she stood. Then she kissed the top of my head before gathering my dishes and heading for the sink.

My heart lurched a little at the thought. I thanked Esme again, then rushed through the rest of my morning ritual.

Edward was waiting for me by the door as I descended the stairs, his smile wide and knowing. I blushed a little, then allowed him to help me with my jacket before following him out the door to his car.

He said nothing to me until we were halfway up the winding trail that led away from his house.

"You had a good conversation with Esme."

I blushed again. "Yeah. Your mom is really nice. I thanked her for all she's done for me."

"She's happy to do it."

"Does she have the ability to control moods? Like Jasper can? When she touched my hand, I suddenly felt very at peace."

"Not in the same way. She has a strong motherly instinct. It's not recognized as a gift amongst our kind," he added.

"I would call it a gift."

He smiled, then offered me his hand. "Human traits often linger, and intensify, after the change, but they don't always manifest into gifts."

Interesting. I had to wonder what human traits Edward possessed specifically, that transferred over after he was changed.

He could read minds. Maybe as a human, he was good at reading people. Their facial expressions and body language. Sensing their moods. He was also chivalrous. Gentlemanly. Of course, he was born in an era where that wasn't all that uncommon.

"What are you thinking?"

I didn't feel that I could share that with him. He didn't like that he had been changed. Bringing up the subject of when he was human would probably upset him.

So I skirted the question. "Today is going to suck without you."

He laughed, and I instantly smiled. I loved the sound of his laughter. "Yes, the day will… _suck_… while you are at school. With the exception of your lunch period. But then we will have the evening together, and the weekend beyond that."

That lifted my spirits. I would have the entire weekend with him! I kissed the back of his hand as I squeezed it a little tighter.

"How would you like to spend it?" he asked.

"I'm open to suggestions," I answered.

His grin grew. "I have a few ideas in mind."

"Care to share?"

"I would rather surprise you."

Normally, I didn't like surprises, but the possibilities of what he could have in mind made me almost giddy.

Last weekend had been interrupted in the weirdest way possible. With Jasper trying to kill me, and the pain of my condition limiting what Edward and I could do together. This weekend would be different. And our last before my parents came home. Sure, we would probably be spending a lot of weekends together in the future, but they wouldn't unfold in the same way.

I wouldn't be waking up in his arms. I would have chores to do before being allowed to leave. I would have a curfew. I wouldn't get to fall asleep with him beside me as he hummed my lullaby.

That realization dampened my good mood slightly. And of course he noticed.

"What is it?" he asked. He tightened his grip on my hand.

"This will be my last weekend at your house."

"But by no means our last weekend together."

I shrugged. "I know. But it won't be the same."

"The differences will be slight, I promise."

I took comfort in that. Not because of the promise itself – he couldn't really ensure that – but because of his _desire_ to promise. To try and make me happy.

He parked again when we drove into the parking lot. I figured by that, since I knew he wasn't staying, that he was walking me to my first class.

I was right. Angela met up with us halfway to the building. Jessica was nowhere to be found.

"Your shadow is giving it a rest today."

I could only hope. "At least for now," I said. Edward's grip on my hand tightened. He knew something, but I couldn't ask him with Angela there.

"Kirk ordered extra copies of the paper. He's really proud of his… _package_, apparently."

I couldn't help but laugh. "Maybe he doesn't pad his Speedo after all."

"Or maybe he's trying to hide the fact that he does. Overcompensation and all that."

Even Edward smirked at that.

"I'll see you inside." Angela gave me a little smile, and then she jogged up ahead, allowing us a few minutes of semi-privacy before class started.

"My shadow won't be giving up so easily, will she?" I asked him. He shook his head.

I figured as much.

We entered the building, but before he walked me into the classroom, he stopped and turned to face me. His eyes were intense. Luring. Instinctively, I knew why.

He raked his hand into my hair, then slowly closed the space between us and touched his lips to mine. It was a quick peck more than anything – he probably didn't want to overwhelm me – but it was perfect.

I was able to keep my heart from racing too much, and my breathing remained close to normal.

Acclimation.

He then took my hand and led the way, straight into the classroom and to my desk. Mr. Jefferson huffed, but Edward ignored him.

Once I was seated, Edward locked eyes with me.

"I will see you at lunch," he whispered.

Then Mr. Jefferson cleared his throat. He was undoubtedly annoyed.

"No, sir," Edward said as he walked away from me and headed for the door, "I won't be staying."

He didn't look at the teacher or even pause in his steps as he said it. Angela smirked. Then I did, too.

It was funny how he could be respectful and impolite, all at the same time. Mr. Jefferson obviously didn't see the humor in it.

"Will this be a regular thing now, Miss Swan?"

I wiped away my smile and shrugged. It probably would be, but I wasn't about to admit that to the teacher.

He huffed again then turned his back on the class. Angela nudged me, a grin exploding across her face. I could tell she was trying to prevent it.

Mr. Jefferson wasn't a disliked teacher, but he certainly wasn't anyone's favorite. He was a bit too hard-nosed. Seeing him flustered was amusing.

The three periods before lunch seemed to drag like days. I considered texting Edward between classes, but with the light drizzle, I knew I would end up killing myself if I didn't watch my every step. Besides, he did have a life beyond just me. I'd see him at lunch. And that thought kept me going.

I saw him at our table as I walked through the double doors. Jessica was in her usual spot, but she avoided looking in my direction as I stepped past her. Yeah, she was definitely mad at me.

Edward stood as I approached, then held my chair out for me. But before I could sit, he wrapped his arms around me.

"I missed you," he whispered into my hair.

Maybe I should have texted him between classes.

"I missed you, too."

I heard him inhale deeply before releasing me.

I took my seat shakily, smiling at him as he joined me. When he raised his hand, like he was waving someone over, I turned to see who he was flagging. Angela. She was all smiles, her hand in Eric's as she walked straight for us.

"Hey guys!"

She was clearly in a good mood. She usually was on Fridays. Not only because the weekend was upon us, but because she was often congratulated for her piece in the school paper, which was always issued on a Friday.

"You're here so much, maybe you oughta enroll!"

Edward smiled. "I might just do that," he said. And then my heart lurched.

I knew he had heard it. It was obvious he had by the way he stared back at me. It wasn't a look of concern, really. It was more like he was trying to convey that he was seriously considering it.

The idea of it thrilled me. He would probably be bored to non-tears, but at least we could be together. At least for some classes. There was no way he wouldn't be placed in the gifted program, and since I was in the program as well, it increased the likelihood of that.

"Why are you homeschooled?"

Eric's question made my smile drop instantly. I'm sure I looked terrified as I stared at Edward. But he didn't seem fazed at all. He could read minds, after all. He probably knew the question was coming.

"It was my parents' decision," he answered. "They wanted a curriculum that this school didn't offer."

I quickly changed the subject before Eric could pry further. "I'm really looking forward to tonight. Though it's not exactly a celebratory thing for me, since I have to take Wednesday's test next Friday."

"It's not your fault you got sick," Angela said. "Maybe I should make that the topic of next week's editorial. I wonder if anyone else has gotten sick eating here."

That made me feel guilty. I didn't want anyone to get in trouble, especially since I hadn't actually gotten ill.

"I'm sure it was just fluke." When I glanced up at Edward, his eyes shone with compassion.

He knew how much I hated to lie. He could tell I was berating myself.

"It takes longer than a few minutes for the symptoms of food poisoning to present. Usually, it takes twenty-four hours. Perhaps it was something that my mother prepared for you."

I tensed when Angela and Eric looked up at Edward with surprised expressions. He sounded too medically knowledgeable. My brain scrambled for a way to fix it, but I couldn't think of anything.

"According to my dad," he added. Then he shrugged.

Eric went back to his lunch and Angela sighed.

"Then I need another topic," she said.

I almost sighed, too. With relief. I threw a discreet smile at Edward before starting in on my lunch.

"You always panic about that," I reminded her, "but you've never missed a deadline. Don't worry, an idea will come to you."

"Perhaps the movie we are seeing tonight will inspire an idea," Edward offered.

Angela seemed grateful for the suggestion. "Yeah, maybe. That's a good thought, actually. And even if it doesn't, maybe I could just do a movie review." Her smile widened. "Thanks, Edward."

"You're most welcome."

His response was a little too formal, but he said it in a casual manner. Neither Angela nor Eric seemed to notice anything amiss, though. I chalked it up as a win and moved on.

"So, Eric, you're on the prom committee, right? What's the theme?"

He held a finger up as he chewed, then swallowed before announcing with considerable enthusiasm, "Monte Carlo. Gambling, tuxes, and Bond… James Bond."

Angela laughed at that.

"Seriously?" I asked. Not that I would be going, but it seemed to be a weird choice.

"Yeah! Oh and hey! That reminds me… I need your guys' playlists."

"Bella, we should head down to Port Angeles before all the good dresses are taken! You _are_ going, aren't you?"

Angela's eyes twitched in Edward's direction as she asked me that. I turned six shades of red in response.

"I hadn't planned on it, no."

"Why not?"

She seemed genuinely surprised. So did Edward.

"Me and dancing? Yeah, not so much."

"You don't _have_ to dance, Bella," she countered. "Just come and hang out!"

I forced myself not to look at Edward. My vision almost blurred with the effort.

"I don't have anything to wear," I said.

"That's why we're going to Port Angeles!" she said with a laugh.

I wondered how weird it would be if I just crawled under the table. Where was a sinkhole when you needed one? Not a big one. Just one directly under my chair.

"I'm not sure if my parents can afford a new dress for me right now. The trip out for Waylon's funeral probably cut into their savings a bit."

Her smile faltered a little. "I'd help if I could," she said. "But hey, what about that gorgeous dress you borrowed from Edward's sister?" She looked directly at him then. "Do you think she would mind loaning it to Bella one more time?"

"No. She wouldn't mind." He seemed uncomfortable. It made my tension worse.

"Great! Problem solved! You'll still come with me to Port Angeles, though, right? I need your opinion!"

I glanced at Edward before answering. "Sure. When?"

Please don't say this weekend.

"Probably next weekend. We have family plans _this_ weekend. Maybe Edward and Eric can come along? They can guy around while we shop, and then we can all grab some lunch."

Sure. Edward and Eric could stand around awkwardly for a couple hours, and then we could all go to a restaurant, where Edward would feel obligated to eat something he'd have to hurl back up later. That sounded like a _great_ idea.

"I'm not sure if Edward's free next weekend," I said.

"I'm free."

I nearly choked on my own spit. What the hell? I was trying to give him an out! Why didn't he take it?

"I wouldn't have to hold your purse or anything, right?" Eric asked Angela. She laughed.

"No. I'm perfectly capable of holding my own purse."

Eric shrugged. "Then I'm in."

I wanted to include Edward in my world, but I hadn't expected it to happen so quickly, or to that degree. It seemed like too much too fast. My expression gave me away, but Angela mistook it for something else entirely.

"Don't worry. It'll be painless, I promise."

It was common knowledge that I hated shopping. I went with it.

"Painless? Getting stitches without anesthesia is less painful."

"You would know!" she teased.

I grinned, then went back to eating my sandwich.

"Seriously guys… playlists? Help me out here."

I gave Eric a nod. I was sure I had a few songs on my iPod that would be considered prom worthy. As much as I adored Edward's compositions, I doubted the party-going crowd would feel the same.

"You know I'll help you out," Angela told him. Her smile was a little flirtatious. I hid a grin.

"Excellent. What about you, Edward? Can I count on your help, too?"

He hesitated before responding. "My taste in music is a bit… old-fashioned."

"Really?" Eric asked. "Like, the oldies or something?"

Edward shook his head. "Classical."

"Seriously? Like, Mozart and Beethoven?"

I couldn't tell if Eric was surprised or impressed. Or maybe it was a little bit of both. But then Edward smiled just a little, so I had to assume he was at least a little impressed.

"Bella was saying that you're a pianist?" Angela asked. I could tell by her tone that she was trying very hard to sound like she wasn't prying.

Edward first looked at Eric, then at Angela. "Yes to both," he said.

Okay, in hindsight, I don't know what the hell I was thinking. Well, I do, but it wasn't a well thought out idea. Pride made me do it. Not pride in myself, but in Edward.

I yanked my iPod out of my pocket, cued up track number five – one of my favorites – and extended the earbuds towards Eric and Angela. They each took one and listened.

Within seconds, both of their jaws dropped.

"Dude! This is _you_?" Eric asked. He didn't even wait for a response. "You got mad skills!"

And then I was punished for my bragging. Eric leaned across the table and put his hand up, palm out.

Fear shot through me in an instant. Edward wouldn't be able to return a high-five. Eric would feel the cold and hard of his skin. Possibly even hurt himself if he hit it too hard. But he couldn't just leave him hanging, either. It would seem weird. And rude.

I needed to create a distraction. The moment the thought hit me, I acted.

As soon as I allowed my iPod to slip from my fingers and onto the floor, I reached down to grab it. Then I purposefully fell out of my chair. Edward was by my side in the flash of a second.

"Bella…" The concern in Edward's tone as he whispered my name made my guilt soar.

"Bella, are you okay?" Angela sounded concerned, too, but there was confusion mixed in.

I could hear laughter in the distance. "Yeah, I'm okay." I was an idiot, but I was okay.

I felt Edward helping me off the ground, back into my seat. He never let go of my hand as he pulled his chair over to right beside mine.

"What happened?"

The attention I was being given was almost unbearable. I didn't like attention when I actually hurt myself, let alone when I was faking it. Not that I'd ever had to fake it before.

I answered Angela's question with a joke. "I can't even sit in a chair, apparently. And you want me to go to a dance."

She laughed. "I told you, you don't have to dance. Maybe you shouldn't," she added, teasing me.

I smirked back at her.

"I think you busted your iPod," Eric said as he passed it over to me.

Great. There was no way my parents would buy me a new one.

"Should I call my father?"

Oh, God. Yeah, that's what I wanted. More people involved in this. "No, Edward, I'm okay. I promise."

"At least let me take you to the nurse."

I stared back at him pointedly. "Edward, I've fallen often enough to know when I'm injured. Relax."

If he didn't stop with the intensity and anguish, Angela and Eric were going to notice. I needed another distraction. A less dramatic one, preferably.

"So, what are your plans this weekend?" I asked Angela.

She took to the new subject without hesitation.

I squeezed Edward's hand a little tighter. It was at those times that I wished he could read my mind. If he could, he would have known I was alright, and that I had dropped out of my chair on purpose.

There was no way to convey it to him. Subtlety seemed to be lost on him, due to his concern for me, and his protective nature.

Eric seemed oblivious. He started sorting through papers in his binder, nodding and 'hmm'ing as Angela shared her itinerary with us.

But Angela wasn't. I could just tell by the expression on her face that she was fully aware of Edward's abnormal behavior.

Couldn't he read her thoughts? He had to know she was scrutinizing his reactions. He was staring at me like I was on my deathbed.

I could feel the panic rising. But then I remembered something.

Alice. Yesterday, Edward merely decided that he wanted her to show up, and she did.

Maybe. Just maybe.

Seconds later, Edward's cell started ringing. The relief I felt from that was short lived, though. He made no move to answer it.

"Edward…" How weird would it seem if I dug into his pocket and answered it myself? Too weird, I decided. "It could be important," I said.

His eyes never left mine as he reached into his pocket, retrieved his phone, clicked 'talk', and raised it to his ear.

"Hello." His expression remained unchanged. "No." Then he quirked his eyebrow at me. "She did?"

"Maybe you should take it outside?" I suggested.

Finally, it seemed I had broken through to him in some way. He nodded, then stood and left the cafeteria.

"Bella?"

Crap. She was going to question it. It didn't really surprise me, but I had hoped…

"He's just a little intense because I'm so accident prone." That was an understatement, but I downplayed it. "He's okay."

She chuckled a little, but her concern was still present. "Well, he'd better get used to it, or he's going to give himself a heart attack. I've never seen anyone look so tortured. And you didn't even actually hurt yourself!"

"Dude's got it bad," Eric muttered. He scoffed in amusement as he shook his head.

I went for the joke. I needed to lighten things up. "I bet he'd even hold my purse for me if I asked him to."

Okay, that worked. They both laughed, and then they started playfully bickering with each other.

When Edward walked back in and retook his seat, he seemed much better. Calm. In control.

"Alice says hi," he said. Then he smiled.

The ease in his tension finally allowed me to relax. The potential crisis seemed to be averted.

One thing was clear to me, though, as I finished my lunch and redirected the conversation into safe areas…

Edward needed more coaching.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

Insanely long babble session in three… two… one…

I'm starting to think that, by some of the reviews I've received, that this story might not always be appealing to the readers. I apologize for this, but want to explain something…

I started and continued to write this fic for me. I'm not trying to sound rude or snobbish, so please forgive me if I come across as such, because that's not my intention, but this was always intended to be for my amusement only. When I realized I had something that others might enjoy, by the encouragement of my beta, I decided to post it.

There will be no newborns, no nomadic vampires trying to hunt Bella, and no Volturi throwing their weight around. This will simply be a domesticated telling of Edward and Bella's love story. How they are with each other, how they deal with their differences, how they find a way through all of it.

I like to psychoanalyze characters, essentially. I like to strip them emotionally bare and work out how they think, how they come to certain conclusions, how they reason and reconcile events in their lives. That's what the goal was for this story, and hopefully, others will enjoy the journey as much as I have.

The characters will most likely seem OOC at times, but I've tried very hard to keep their core personality traits intact, and feel that by the end of it all, they are true to form with few differences.

I do hope that I don't disappoint, but can't help but believe that some might very well be (disappointed) when all is said and done. Again, I apologize for that.

Story time:

I'm the kind of person that, when something strikes my interest, I go all out. I proudly wear the Cullen family wristcuff, I have a Twilight messenger bag I use as a purse, I have a team Edward canvas bag I carry on the back of my wheelchair, I have Edward 'dog tags' (from New Moon) that I have attached to my keys. Etcetera. If it brings me an ounce of happiness, what's the harm?

Anyway, I went to the store yesterday, and while shopping, I was approached by three women who near about attacked me. Also fans, obviously, and quite excited to see all my Twilight gear. One actually offered me fifty dollars for the wristcuff!

I'm meeting up with two of them later today, to see Eclipse again before it leaves the theaters. This will be my thirteenth time seeing it.

Obsessed? Yeah, pretty much, but again, what's the harm? I don't bother anyone else with it. I don't spend money I don't have to spare on the merchandise. I don't do anything but sit here in my little corner of the world and enjoy it.

It's just after four in the morning now. I can't sleep (typical for me; long story as for why), so I'm going to go ahead and post this chapter now. I'll be busy later, and won't be able to post it, if I wait, until early evening.

The next chapter is one of my faves, and then the one after that covers 'date night'.

Thanks again for the wonderful reviews! Please continue to do so, and I will continue to be grateful!

MTLBYAKY

P.S.: Still not smoking. Patches are great! I don't want to rip my own arm off anymore. (grin)


	24. Chapter 24

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Twenty-Four

By: Jana~

**XXX**

"I did it on purpose, Edward," I whispered. We were just far enough away from the Biology classroom that I was sure no one would overhear us if we kept our voices low. "Eric was expecting you to high-five him. I did it as a distraction."

"I know."

That surprised me. If he knew, then why did he freak out?

"It doesn't change the fact that you could have been hurt."

"Edward…" I sighed his name, then wrapped my arms around his waist and pressed my forehead against his chest. "I _will_ get hurt from time to time. It's inevitable."

I felt _and_ heard him wince. The whimpering sound he made was heartwrenching.

"I can't bear the thought of it."

Intense was definitely an understatement. Could vampires lose their minds? He seemed on the verge of it.

"Then try not to think about it. Okay? Please? It kills me to see you looking so worried. I didn't even hurt myself. This time," I added.

"You have a bruise. I can smell it."

I did? He could? "A bruise is nothing. Really. I'm fine."

"This time," he repeated.

Okay, so we were back on the future problems subject. I pulled back just enough so that I could look up at him. "Promise me something."

He suddenly got very serious, but his pain seemed to ease. "Anything."

"Before, you asked me to trust you. Now I'm asking _you_ to trust _me_. If I say I'm fine… believe me? Or, at least, can you promise to _try_ to believe me?"

"Yes. If you promise me something in return."

"Be more careful?" I asked, smirking.

He cracked a small smile, but it dropped quickly. "Yes, but I have another promise in mind." I gave a nod, encouraging him to tell me. "Always be honest with me, when it comes to your physical and mental wellness."

That was fair. I nodded again. "I promise."

His smile stayed that time. I traced it, gently, smiling in return.

"You need to go to class now."

Of course. I rolled my eyes, then took his hand when he offered it to me and allowed him to lead me into the classroom.

Mr. Molina greeted Edward warmly. That made me smile wider. He was one of the best liked teachers at the school. He was _my_ favorite, at least.

"Mr. Cullen! Will you be joining us again today?"

"No, sir," Edward returned respectfully. He seemed to like Mr. Molina. "I'm just seeing Bella to her seat."

And then he did. He held my chair out for me, waited for me to be settled, and then he leaned in and kissed my cheek. I could hear giggling, but I ignored it. It wasn't a struggle to, either. I just honestly didn't care if others found humor in Edward's affections or not.

He smiled so sweetly at me as he pulled back. "I will see you at three," he whispered.

I nodded stupidly, which seemed to make his smile grow.

As he left, he gave Mr. Molina a courteous nod.

I was dreading Gym, and the reason why I was approached me the second I reached my locker.

"Saw your little mishap in the cafeteria. I'm sure Edward will be glad when he doesn't have to babysit you anymore."

I didn't even have time to seethe. The last syllable had just left Jessica's mouth when my text message ringtone started going off. I could still feel the anger that had started to rise, but curiosity won out as the dominant emotion.

'Dearest Bella,

Ignore her. Please.

Love,

Edward'

He was nearby!

'Edward,

Where are you?

Love,

Bella'

I gave a little scoffing sound towards Jessica when I caught her staring at me.

"Did he get the short straw or something? Or do they all babysit you in shifts?"

It took everything in my power not to respond to her snide questions.

'Dearest Bella,

I am in my car, in the parking lot, as I am every day as I wait for you. Please, ignore her.

Love,

Edward'

Wait. He didn't ever leave?

'Edward,

I'm doing my best to ignore her. You never leave? You just sit out there in your car and wait for me? Have you always done that? Since the beginning?

Love,

Bella'

If I didn't get dressed out, I was going to be late for class. I shoved my phone in my pocket and whipped off my shirt.

And then I froze.

Oh, God. He could _see_ me through other people's thoughts. I grabbed my gym shirt and quickly threw it on. Several shades of red colored my face, I was sure of it. The look on Jessica's face just confirmed that.

"What's wrong? Are you _sick_ again?"

Ignoring her became easier. My brain was too preoccupied. I was almost afraid to read the newest incoming message.

'Dearest Bella,

No, I never leave, and with the exception of Wednesday, when I remained at your house, yes, I have always done so. Since the beginning. I owe you an apology, Bella. Will you please allow me to explain before you think too poorly of me?

Love,

Edward'

Yeah, he could see me.

"You've been acting really weird lately."

"I've had a lot on my mind," I muttered.

And the list of things kept growing. I left unsaid that she was the proverbial pot, calling the kettle black. At least I wasn't stalking people.

'Edward,

Last message or I'll be late. I don't think poorly of you. I'm just embarrassed. We'll talk after school.

Love,

Bella'

I kept my body turned slightly away from Jessica as I finished getting changed. That didn't stop her from pestering me, though. But I only knew she was because I could hear her voice, sounding a little like a tste fly buzzing around my head.

She eventually gave up and left the locker room.

The rest of the day, before the final dismissal bell, was like a blur. Hazy. I moved through it, functioned, but I was almost detached from it. Like I wasn't me at all, but some character in a movie I was watching.

I wasn't upset with him, like he probably assumed. It was just an unsettling thought. A thought that should have occurred to me before, if I was as perceptive as he seemed to think I was.

All the clues were there, yet I missed them. Alice had even said something before I learned the Cullen family secret. When we had been playing dress-up, she mentioned that Edward would want to see me 'firsthand'.

Why hadn't I made that connection?

So, no, I wasn't upset with _him_. I was upset with myself.

My eyes remained downcast all the way to the car. I only knew I had arrived at it because I saw his feet come into my line of sight.

I felt his finger touch my chin. Reluctantly, I looked up and met his gaze.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered, and then he gathered me into his arms.

My embarrassment slipped a little as I allowed the love radiating from him to soothe me.

"You have nothing to apologize for," I whispered back. "It's not like you were keeping your abilities a secret from me. I just didn't make the connection before."

"I promise you, Bella, I try to avoid thoughts that would invade your privacy."

I believed that. It would be the gentlemanly thing to do, and he was that to a fault.

"Let's talk in the car," I suggested.

The atmosphere was awkward at first, as we started driving towards his house, but I pushed past it.

"I'm not upset with you, Edward. I'm upset with myself." He arched his eyebrow in response. "I'm apparently not as perceptive as you – or others – think I am. I feel like I'm stumbling around, trying to piece things together."

"These are very new concepts to you. In eight days, you have ascertained more than any other human I have ever encountered. Through the decades, a few people have suspected _something_, but none have been astute enough to arrive at the right conclusions."

His compliment made me uncomfortable. I didn't _feel_ very astute.

"I should have explained my… ability… to you more clearly. I guess I'm stumbling around as well. I wasn't sure how much would be wise to share."

"Wise?" I asked.

"I didn't want to upset you. Or make you uncomfortable. Yet I did so, it seems, with my negligence."

"You weren't being negligent, Edward. I can understand how weird that would have been to talk about. 'By the way, I can see you through other people's thoughts when you're half naked.'"

He winced. Maybe it was a bad choice of words. Or maybe he was wincing at the memory of my very plain and uninteresting physical appearance when in that state of undress. That made _me_ wince.

"I distract myself, Bella, I promise you. I'm not a voyeur."

There was no way to ask him, though. 'Okay, great, but did you like what you saw before you distracted yourself?'

"I believe you," I said instead.

"Do you? You seem bothered still."

I was, but I couldn't tell him what my concerns were. "Not bothered, really. Just thinking."

"Will you share your thoughts with me?"

"I'm not really comfortable sharing _these_ thoughts. Sorry."

"May I ask why?"

My traitorous heart picked up pace.

"What's wrong?" he asked. Of course he could hear the pounding.

"Nothing. I'm just embarrassed," I whispered. I wondered if he would just drop it if I asked him to.

"Is there anything I can do to make this right?"

"If we could just drop it. That would be… good."

He seemed in pain again, as he traversed the winding path that led to his house. He said nothing further, until he parked and opened my door for me.

After offering me his hand and helping me out, he asked, "Have I ruined everything?"

I threw my arms around his neck and pulled myself into him. "Of course not. That's not where my thoughts are."

"I wish you would share them with me."

My thoughts shifted to the occupants of the house in front of me. I wasn't comfortable telling Edward, let alone the entire Cullen clan.

"We have a little bit of time, right? Before we have to leave? Maybe we could continue this conversation out of earshot?"

Before I could even register what had happened, he had closed the car door behind me, pulled me up onto his back, and we were flying through the forest.

I hid my face again, but not because I was scared. Well, okay, I was, but not of his running. I didn't know what I was going to say to him once we got to wherever he was taking me. I needed to concentrate, which was hard to do when scenery was rushing by at an alarming speed.

When we stopped and he helped me onto my feet, he stared at me with a mixture of worry and curiosity.

I hadn't had enough time to consider what I would say. The journey was too quick.

"Just… let me get my thoughts together," I asked of him. I turned away – I had to; his eyes were too intense – and plopped myself down under a tree. He joined me, a few feet in front of me, then he just sat silently and waited.

If someone could possibly die of embarrassment, this would be the moment it would happen. "I'm not upset with you because you… _saw_ me. But… I just can't help but wonder… what you thought when you did."

He seemed confused. Excellent. I was going to have to spell it out for him. Hopefully, my death would be swift.

I pulled my legs up so that I could press my forehead to my knees. "I know I'm not very attractive—"

"Bella…"

"Please, don't— I'm not looking for you to confirm it. I was just telling you where my thoughts were, so that you would know I'm not upset with you. Because I'm not."

"I don't think there is a way in which you are not unique. You're not cross that I have the ability to invade your privacy. Instead, you are concerned that I might not find you attractive?"

Apparently, one can't die of embarrassment. The anguish of it lingered. Death refused to release me from it.

I shrugged, continuing to hide my face from him even when I sensed him moving closer to me.

"You think so little of yourself. It saddens me."

I shrugged again. Maybe I _did_ have low self-esteem. I never really cared before. My physical appearance was just a fact. I was who I was. It never mattered to me, because there was never anyone I wanted to be appealing to… until now.

"I don't wish to embarrass you, but I feel you should know… I find you attractive."

How was that possible? In comparison to his beauty, he was like a rose, and I was like a weed.

Or maybe he was lying to make me feel better. I braved a glance up at him, and was met by his very serious eyes.

No. He wasn't lying.

He was also nearer to me than I was expecting him to be.

"Please, Bella, tell me what you're thinking."

I dropped my attention to the ground as I shifted into a cross-legged position. I wasn't sure that being honest with him was the best thing to do, but I had made a promise to be. Earlier, outside of Biology.

"I'm feeling inadequate again."

He sighed. "I would give all I have, to be able to read your mind right now. For just this one moment. _I _am the inadequate one, Bella. Not you. Never you."

We made quite a team, Edward and I. Both of us self-deprecating. Both unable to understand what the other saw in us. Of course, in my case, I was justified. But, then again, he probably thought he was justified, too.

I had to scoff at that. "I don't get it."

"What don't you get?"

"How you can say that. What you see in me. I could _not_ be more ordinary. And next to you, I'm literally a nothing."

He scooted closer, pulling me into his lap. "You're everything to me, Bella. Everything."

I still didn't get why, but I accepted it. I had to. Not only because I wanted it to be true, but because it clearly _was_ true. He expressed that without question, as he held me tightly to him. Like I was the most precious commodity on the planet. Like I was literally his entire world. His entire reason for existing.

He slipped his hand into my hair, encouraging me to shift back. Then he leaned in and kissed me. Gently. And then he kissed me again. His lips left mine after a few moments, but they never broke contact with my skin.

He brushed them softly across my cheek, inhaling deeply as he did so. I knew where he was headed, and my breath caught in anticipation. But then he stopped himself. The disappointment was almost devastating.

Yeah, I always seemed to black out when he paid special attention to my neck, but I liked it. Maybe this time I wouldn't. I probably just needed to acclimate to the intensity of it. Something I wouldn't be able to do if he stopped himself.

I was just about to protest – tell him to please continue – when he sighed deeply while creating distance between us.

"We should go home now. You will need time to get ready."

Right. Date night. I didn't want to go, though. Not yet. I wanted more affection. As much as he was willing to give me, and take from me.

I nodded, but countered my agreeing gesture by kissing him again. He responded, which just encouraged me. Then I repeated what he had done, only I didn't stop.

I nuzzled his neck, then brushed my lips, slightly parted, across it. When he moaned, arousal shot through me. Something about this was very appealing to him, giving and receiving. It was appealing to me, too, for reasons I didn't understand.

I deepened the kisses, like he had done to me before, then I settled my teeth against his skin.

He _really_ liked that. He pushed his hand into my hair and moaned louder.

I don't know what happened. It was just instinct. I bit down. It was like trying to bite through a marble slab, not that I was attempting to break through his skin.

I felt him shudder, and then this… _sound_ escaped him. It was like a combination of a groan, moan, and growl. I wasn't scared, but I _was_ curious. I pushed back, staring at him.

His eyes were wild – I'd never seen them look like that – but I didn't have time to process it for long. They changed within seconds. Multiple times. From shock, to fear, to… shame?

Maybe, but I couldn't be sure.

The only thing I was sure of was… I had done something wrong. I didn't know exactly what, but it was obvious to me that I had.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

I was suddenly up on my feet, and he was holding me by the waist at arm's length.

"Why did you do that?" He seemed confused. Frantically confused.

"I don't know," I answered. "It just sort of… happened. I'm sorry," I said again.

Out of nowhere, Alice appeared. Her eyes were wide with worry.

"Take Bella back to the house," Edward said. Before I could question it, he was gone.

I just stood there, stunned, until I felt Alice's hand on my shoulder.

"I didn't mean to upset him."

"He's upset with himself, not you."

I seriously doubted that. "Why should he be? _I_ was the one who bit _him_."

She smirked, but it dropped quickly. A seriousness I had never seen from her before followed.

"I'm going to let Edward explain this to you. When he's ready. Just trust me, he's not upset with you."

She then gestured for me to climb up on her back. I stared at her incredulously.

"Trust me, I can handle it," she said. Her bright smile finally returned to her face.

I was too confused to argue. I hopped up onto her back, and, whoosh, we were off.

Edward was definitely faster, but she wasn't slow by any definition of the word.

We entered the house through the front door instead of Edward's bedroom window wall.

"He just needs to clear his head," she said to me as she settled me onto my feet. "Go ahead and get ready for tonight. He'll be back soon."

I nodded numbly, then headed up the stairs.

I got ready, but I paid little attention to the task. I showered, dried off, got dressed, put on a little makeup, combed out my wet hair, brushed my teeth… all on autopilot.

When I got back to his room, he was standing by the window wall, facing away from me, staring out into the forest.

He knew I was there, but he remained absolutely still. He had changed his clothes.

I threw my crap down onto the floor by the bed, then just stood there, waiting.

Nine years passed.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

"_I'm_ the one who's sorry, Edward. I don't know why I did that."

He slumped a little. "_I'm_ the reason why, Bella. I encouraged it."

"You seemed to like it… at first," I mentioned. It was only _after_ that he seemed to _not_.

"More than I should have." The pain in his voice intensified.

I was stumbling again, trying to make sense of things that were just outside my realm of understanding.

"Why?" It wasn't exactly an articulate question, but I couldn't think of any other way to ask.

He sighed heavily. Then he took another nine years to answer. "I behaved disgracefully, Bella. I don't deserve your forgiveness, but I ask for it."

Baffled, I shifted and took a step towards him, but stopped when he stiffened. "Am I not allowed near you again?"

"Do you want to be near me, after how I behaved?"

"Of course. I don't even get what the problem is here. I wish you would just explain it to me, instead of speaking all cryptically."

He turned to face me then. His expression held more emotions than I could count. Pain, guilt, frustration, confusion…

"Do you not understand what happened?"

I shook my head. "Explain it to me?"

Again, he sighed heavily, and then he looked away for a long few seconds before planting his gaze firmly on the bed. I took his cue and sat down on the edge of it, then he sat on the floor, exactly where he was.

"It's common amongst… our kind, to express affection in that manner."

Okay, then, that explained why he liked it so much. "If it's common, then what's the problem?"

His expression changed again, though it still held a million emotions. They seemed to be cycling through, one becoming more dominant over another.

"It's common amongst _our kind_." I just blinked stupidly at him in response. That seemed to bring forward frustration. "You're _human_, Bella."

Well, yeah. I knew that. I wasn't _that_ stupid. "I don't think vampires hold the rights to that form of physical expression, Edward."

Irritation pulled forward, but it seemed self-directed. "I should _not_ be encouraging you to emulate me in any form."

"I wasn't trying to emulate you… exactly." He quirked an eyebrow. Curiosity pulled forward. "I was just trying to be affectionate. I liked it when you did it to me, so I thought you might like it if I did it to you."

Shame showed itself. "I liked it," he whispered. It wasn't even really a whisper. It was just this very low almost-groan.

"I'm glad," I whispered back. And I was. I wanted to make him feel good, like he made me feel good.

Shock then dominated. "Do you not realize what could have happened? Did you not wonder why Alice came?"

Fear rushed through me, making my heart race. The wild look in his eyes. I had pushed him too far. He had almost lost control, because of me.

"I'm _so_ sorry, Edward. I didn't mean to hurt you like that."

Sadness and pain. If he were able to, I would have sworn he was about to cry.

"You didn't hurt me, Bella. An apology should be _to_ you, not _from_ you. I encouraged it. I almost…" He let out this anguished sigh, with this kind of whimpering sound embedded into it. "Reciprocated."

I had to go to him. I had to. He was _hurting_. But when I stood, he tensed, like he was about to fling himself out the window wall thing behind him. I stopped, pointing my finger at him sternly.

"Don't. I'm coming over to you, and you will sit there and let me."

I heard laughter from downstairs. Emmett. Great. We had an audience.

I took another tentative step, to see what his reaction would be. He didn't budge. I finished the distance then and plopped myself into his lap.

He wrapped his arms around me carefully, like he thought I was breakable. To him I was.

"_Almost_ only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades, Edward. You _didn't_, and that's the important thing. You stopped yourself."

If I'd ever thought for a moment that I was even somewhat normal, today had proven otherwise beyond all reasonable doubt. I had almost died, but instead of being scared, I was consoling the man who almost took my life.

"You said before that you want me to be happy," I reminded him. Then I pulled back and stared straight into his eyes. "Being affectionate with you makes me happy. Maybe today was a mistake, maybe it wasn't, but I don't regret it. There will probably be a lot of trial and error, but we'll eventually work it out. Okay?"

He nodded. Reluctantly, it seemed. When I smiled at him reassuringly, his pain and tension eased a little. Then he smiled back. It was slight, but it was genuine. I could just tell.

"You ready to face my friends?" I asked.

His smile grew. That was a yes. He scooped me up as he stood, then he kissed my lips for a brief second, tenderly, before settling me onto my feet.

I ignored Emmett's smirk as Edward and I walked towards the door.

"Have fun!" Alice called out.

I knew she'd had a vision of how the night would go. Her happy tone made me optimistic.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

I am humbled by all the wonderful reviews and words of encouragement. Thank you. Sincerely.

ADarnell: Wait for it. (grin) (Read your last review to me. You'll know what I mean. Hopefully.)

The element I liked most about this chapter was the biting affection. I'm curious to know what others thought of it.

Next chapter is date night. I had the ideas for the next chapter from near about the start of writing this fic, and was very pleased with how it turned out. It felt good to see the scenes that were playing out in my head finally on the page, in print.

GoldenBeliever: I think that's why I'm so hard on myself right now. I feel like there has been a lot of… well, hype, for lack of a better term, about 'date night', and I'm feeling anxious. I don't want to disappoint. In the 'Friends' fandom, I felt comfortable, and loved, because I had been there for so long. I'm new here, and while I am thrilled by the wonderful welcome and encouragement, I feel like I'm... well, intruding, I guess, somehow. I don't know. I'm weird.

I got the wristcuff off ebay. Cost me a pretty penny, too. Forty dollars after shipping, but that's because they're not easy to find anymore.

Randomly, I'm loving the Eclipse soundtrack. Just thought I'd share.

Please review! And MTLBYAKY


	25. Chapter 25

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Twenty-Five

By: Jana~

**XXX**

We held hands all the way to the diner. Things seemed right again. I felt at peace. He appeared to be as well. He was smiling.

We were the last ones to arrive, but we weren't exactly late. It was only three minutes after five. Everyone was probably excited to get the fun underway.

Edward offered me his hand after opening my door, then he helped me out and onto my feet. As we walked towards and into the restaurant, he pulled me to his side and kissed my temple. The attention that gained us was unwanted, but it didn't really bother me, either. I was just too happy to care.

"Hey! There you guys are! We held off on ordering!"

I smiled at Angela as Edward held my chair out for me and I took a seat. "Sorry. Took me longer than usual to get ready."

"Typical girl," Tyler complained. "Hurry up and choose! Some of us are starving!"

"I know what I want," I said, rolling my eyes. I always got the same thing. Mushroom ravioli with a side salad.

Then, curiously, my heart lurching a little, I looked to Edward.

"I had a late lunch," he said, smiling. "I'll just have a soda."

Tyler immediately turned towards the counter and flagged the waitress.

I caught Jessica staring at me from the other side of the table, but I quickly averted my eyes. I was _not_ in any mood to deal with her. I was happy, and I wasn't about to have her ruin that for me.

When the waitress came over to take our order, Edward surprised not only me, but the entire group.

"Separate checks again, guys?" she asked.

Angela took in a breath, about to answer, but then Edward spoke up, cutting her off.

"One check, please, ma'am. Given to me. Thank you."

Jessica and Mike gasped. He was sitting next to her.

"That's so… generous," Angela said.

Edward smiled at her, giving her a subtle nod.

"Piano dude rules!" Eric exclaimed, then he informed the table, "This guy's got mad skills, I'm tellin'ya!"

After the waitress took all our orders and left to go fill them, Jessica asked, "You play the piano, Edward?"

Her tone was a little flirtatious. Mike scowled.

Edward smiled at her, but it was slight. Strained. Guarded. "Yeah."

I hid a smirk. He sounded so casual!

"I would love to hear you play some time," she said.

Edward didn't respond. He just looked away and to me. His smile changed to adoring.

The conversations that followed were mostly about TV shows and video games. Angela and Eric tried to include Edward a few times, and while he responded well – I got the feeling he had plucked answers and details out of their heads before he did – nothing really flowed from it.

He kept his staring at me to a minimum. He even pretended to drink his soda. I knew he wasn't really drinking it, though. I could see the liquid ascend in the straw, but the level in the glass never changed. Once I was done with _my_ soda, he pushed his towards me.

When the check came, Edward extracted seven twenty dollar bills from his wallet and handed them to the waitress.

"No change," he said.

She almost choked to death! It was easily a fifty dollar tip! Everyone was staring at him with mouths agape.

When she walked away – stumbled away, really – I leaned in and whispered, "You're supposed to double the tax of the bill, not double the tax of beachfront property."

He just grinned in response.

The drive to Port Angeles, to the movie theater, was a little bit frightening. I knew he liked to drive fast, but once he was outside Forks city limits, he pushed the speedometer to over a hundred, easily.

"Edward! Please! Slow down! Frail little human sitting here!"

He laughed, then dropped his speed to around eighty. It was still too fast, but I bit my tongue and sucked it up.

Maybe a conversation would distract me from my potential death by collision with a tree.

"I want to ask you something, but I don't want to upset you."

"You can ask me anything."

Yeah, no I couldn't. That was proven time and time again. I didn't argue the point, though.

"What about the neck thing is so… appealing?" He tensed, which just confirmed my earlier thought. "You said I could ask you anything," I reminded him.

He tightened his hold on my hand after lacing his fingers through mine. "It has to do with our instincts."

"Could you be more specific?"

"It might frighten you."

"Yeah, well, I think I've shown that it takes a lot to frighten me." I was somewhat teasing, though the statement was certainly true.

He chuckled a little. "Yes. You have." Gaining seriousness, he sighed before continuing. "It has to do with our hunting instincts. There is something very gratifying about that moment. The smell. The taste. Every vampire in existence has felt it. When we are with our mate… to simulate that moment…"

He trailed off, but I understood what he meant. I also knew better than to press him further. I dropped it and stared out at the road rushing towards us. Several minutes passed before the silence was interrupted.

"You're not frightened." He wasn't asking. He was surprised, though.

"No. I know you think I should be, and maybe you're right, but I'm not. I know you won't hurt me. You've said it yourself, multiple times. You only want for my happiness. You panic if I fall out of my chair on purpose. There's no way you could ever inflict injury upon me."

"Never intentionally." He seemed to be agreeing with me, but his tone was contradicting.

I rolled my eyes. "You have better control than you like to think."

"You place too much faith in that."

"Maybe. But you don't place _enough_."

"Bella, you're not comprehending how close I was today, to…"

His words choked off, but I knew what he was going to say.

"I understand that, Edward. I do. A decision was obviously made, or Alice wouldn't have come running. But you changed it. You stopped yourself."

"Only just."

"I'm not dead, so I say we chalk it up as a win."

He scowled at me for my joke. "There is nothing humorous about this situation, Bella."

I rolled my eyes again. "Since it was _my_ life on the line, I say _I_ get to decide if I'm allowed to make a joke about it or not."

He sighed heavily, but I could see the slightest hint of a smile tug at his mouth.

"You should be angry with me."

"Okay, fine," I huffed. "You want me to be angry? I'm very cross with you for almost killing me today, Edward," I scolded him, waggling my finger. When he looked over at me, I grinned. Then I kissed the back of his hand.

He actually rolled his eyes at me! That made me laugh, which brought a genuine smile to his face. Finally.

"Get over it. If _I_ can, _you_ can. We'll just… be more careful next time."

"Next time?" he asked, his voice raising a little. "There won't be a next time, Bella."

"Why not? If _you_ like it, and _I_ like it…"

"It's too dangerous. I won't risk your safety again."

I scoffed. "You're too protective of me."

"There is no such thing, where you are concerned. I _will_ protect you. It's my job to protect you."

I wanted to be annoyed, but really, I just couldn't bring myself to be. His concern for me was sweet. It made me feel loved.

"Your job sucks, then," I quipped. "I'm a handful."

He laughed at that. Hard. "Yes. I know. You are my full time occupation."

"I would demand a raise, if I were you."

He shook his head, his smile playful. "It's a labor of love."

"Then you must _really_ love me." I was still being playful, too, but there was truth and curiosity mixed in. I knew he did, but I wanted to hear him confirm it. He didn't disappoint.

"I do."

That felt good. Like every aspect of my existence had just clicked into place. I kissed the back of his hand again, then nuzzled it.

"I love you, too."

"I know."

I could hear the laughter in his tone. No, not laughter. Joy. It made me smile wider.

We got to the theater before anyone else – none of my friends were quite the speed demon that Edward was – but we used the time to our advantage. After Edward bought enough tickets for everyone in our group, we stood off to the side and waited. Me in his arms. His hold on me loving and protective. Him inhaling my scent. My heart beating a little bit irregularly.

His left hand was on the small of my back, pressing me into him. Not in a forceful way, but with a gentle firmness. His right hand was crossed over to my right shoulder, under my hair, clutching at me both carefully and desperately.

How could something so simple bring on such complex emotions? It was innocent yet risqué, safe yet dangerous, trivial yet of the utmost importance.

My head was spinning from it. I was lost to it. I just soaked it up like a sponge, wrung out and thirsty for more.

"Mike and Jessica are here," he whispered. "Angela, Eric, and Tyler are close."

Crap. I had almost forgotten we were waiting for the others.

He kissed the top of my head, then inched away from me a little and took my hand, right as Mike and Jessica approached.

"And I thought Jessica drove like a maniac!" Mike said, laughing. "How'd you guys get here so fast?"

I shook off the effects of Drug Edward and forced a smile onto my face. "We've only been here a few minutes."

Jessica eyed me for a moment, then she slithered a little closer to Mike. This was obviously for show. Mike didn't seem to mind. Either that or he was oblivious.

"Angela drives like a little old lady!"

We all turned at the sound of Tyler's voice.

"Making it to your destination in one piece is better than making it there _fast_."

Eric laughed. "Yeah!" he exclaimed, backing Angela up. Then he gave Tyler a shove, almost knocking him off the sidewalk.

When Tyler pushed back, Angela dropped Eric's hand and made a beeline straight for me and Edward, trying to dodge the retaliation.

I rolled my eyes at Angela, and she grinned back at me. Teenage boys always seemed to act like twelve year olds whenever they got around each other.

"I took the liberty," Edward said. He extended all but two of the tickets he had purchased towards Angela.

She smiled at him, both gratefully and with surprise. But she didn't even have the chance to thank him.

"Piano dude, you are my new best friend!" And then, once again, like he had earlier in the day, Eric put up his hand, palm out, looking for a high-five.

I intervened. _I_ gave him the high-five, then pushed him away. "Way to suck up, Eric. You're buying your own snacks!"

"Dude saved me a fortune tonight," he said, laughing. "I can actually afford the large combo!"

I opted out of Edward buying me anything at the concession stand. I was still too full from dinner.

We were there in plenty of time to find good seats. Mike and Jessica entered the row first, sitting together to the far right. Tyler, Eric, and Angela were next, in that order. Edward and I sat on the end, me next to Angela, Edward in the seat at the aisle.

I lifted the armrest between us so that we could snuggle up to one another. He put his arm around me and pulled me tighter to him, but he seemed tense. I wasn't sure why. When I looked up into his eyes, hoping to get some idea of what the problem could be, he forced a smile onto his face and shook his head.

I didn't even have time to question it.

"So, Edward, maybe we could work out a day where I could come hear you play the piano."

My gaze had barely shifted to Jessica, standing in front of us, when I felt Edward leave his seat. Instantly, my attention darted over to him, but I could see Jessica stumble back a little out of my peripheral vision. She had almost fallen over the seat in the row up from us.

"Your advances are not welcome! Return to your seat!" Edward then pointed to where she had been sitting next to Mike. It was as if he was scolding a child.

Jessica tripped over everyone's feet, including mine, trying to scramble back.

Edward stood there for a long moment. The theater full of people was hear-a-pin-drop silent. He turned his head just a little.

"I apologize for my disruption," he said. He didn't say it very loudly, but it was enough to be heard. Then he retook his seat next to me.

He put his arm around me again, but he was still tense.

Leaning in towards me, Angela whispered, "That was so rude." At first, I thought she was referring to Edward, but then she added, "She has actually lost her mind. It's so obvious you two are together. To do that… and right in front of you!"

Wait. Was that what all her odd behavior had been about? She wanted Edward?

I looked up at him questioningly, but again he just shook his head. Answers would have to wait, apparently.

Like I imagined it would be, we didn't watch the movie at all. We stared at the screen like we were, but someone could have put a gun to my head, and I still wouldn't have been able to tell the brandisher anything about it.

I was snuggled up against his side the entire time. As I drew intricate and nondescript patterns across his thigh, he nuzzled my hair and inhaled my scent. I could hear him doing so, and it literally made my heart race. I was _appealing_ to him.

I heard him murmur 'I love you, Bella' several times through the course of the one hour and fifty-eight minute movie. I couldn't even say it back. My voice was gone. My head was somewhere far away.

I was only vaguely aware that the credits had started rolling. But then Edward and Angela nudged me at the exact same moment.

"Better than the reviews claimed it was," Angela said as all three of us stood. The others followed us a second later. "At least now I have a topic for the editorial."

I had no idea what she was referring to, so I simply nodded.

We made our way out to the lobby, set to part ways, when Jessica walked up to us. Edward put his arm around me protectively.

"So, um, Bella… I'll see you Monday? At school?"

Edward didn't seem at all tense, like he usually was when we were in her presence. I took note of that before responding.

"Yeah, Jess. Sure. See you Monday."

She smiled a little, then her and Mike headed out the door.

"There may be hope for her yet," Angela said to me. "She seems remorseful."

She did, actually. I would ask Edward once we were in the car.

Angela and I said our goodbyes as Eric and Tyler flung popcorn at each other.

"Thanks, Edward, for your… generosity." Angela looked a bit uncomfortable when saying that. Then she glanced behind her at the guys before adding, "They thank you, too."

Edward smiled. "Thanks for allowing me to tag along."

_Tag_ _along_? That made me grin.

We all left then, splitting up our separate ways once we were in the parking lot.

"See'ya, piano dude!" Eric called out.

I grinned at that, too.

"Was she remorseful?" I asked Edward.

He didn't answer at first. He just reached past me and opened my door. Then he pulled me into his arms.

"Somewhat. She's more humiliated than remorseful."

Well, it was a start. I nodded. "Was that what this has all been about? She wants you?"

"It was the conquest she was wanting. Not me. It was the idea of me. Apparently, she sees me as the most eligible bachelor in town."

I could almost feel him roll his eyes. But I had to agree with her there. "Not anymore you're not," I teased.

He pulled away then, a smile on his face, amusement in his eyes. He raked his hand into my hair as he stared back at me. "I never was. I told you, I was waiting for you, even before you were born."

When his lips touched mine, I melted against him.

He then brushed his kisses towards my ear. "Did you have fun tonight, Bella?" he whispered.

God, his voice was sexy. I hummed in response. My legs grew weak when he copied it, in that sweet melodic way I loved so very much. His hold on me was the only thing that prevented me from hitting the ground.

I knew he was helping me into the car, but then again, I didn't. It only really dawned on me minutes later, as we were driving down the road. He seemed to sense that I had returned to reality. He offered me his hand.

"Is she going to be letting up now?" I asked, returning to the subject of Jessica.

He nodded. "I believe so. I will know better after speaking with Alice."

Alice seemed eager for that conversation. She was waiting for us, at the door, when we arrived at and stepped foot inside the house.

"Well played!" she chirped, her smile beaming. "I didn't see her final decision until you were all at the restaurant."

"I saw it," he said. He smiled, too, but it didn't show the same level of enthusiasm.

"I figured you did, that's why I didn't call. I don't see her being much of a bother in the near future."

He nodded. "Thank you, Alice."

"It's my turn with her, for a few minutes, right?" Alice's eyes shifted to me briefly.

That surprised me. I felt a little like the new toy being passed around again.

Edward's expression grew serious. "I promised you, so, yes. But don't upset her."

Alice scoffed. "Wasn't planning on it! I'm doing you a favor! You don't need to look so irritated!"

He gave a nod. Then his attention was on me. "I will see you upstairs," he said. Whispered, really. He kissed my cheek before pulling his arm away from my waist. And then, whoosh, and he was gone.

"What's going on?" I asked. Suddenly, I felt nervous. Anxious. But almost as soon as I did, a sort of peace washed over me.

"Relax," she said, taking me by the arm. She started dragging me towards the kitchen. "We're just going to have us a little sister time."

As we passed Jasper, Alice winked at him. Okay, so he was why I wasn't worried anymore. Knowing that, I tried to block it, but found I couldn't.

She directed me to my usual seat at the counter, then she pulled out the stool next to it and plopped down.

She stared at me for several long seconds, like she was trying to decide where to begin. Since I had no idea what was going on, I couldn't help her, so I just stared back.

"You've never had a boyfriend before, and Edward is… unique."

Oh, God. Was this going where it seemed like it was going? It felt like my soul had died a little when my mom had _the talk_ with me. I knew I wouldn't survive it again.

She laughed. I could only assume it was because my eyes grew wide and my mouth dropped open.

"Don't worry. I'm not planning on embarrassing you. I'm sure you know all about the… _mechanics_… of things. I just wanted to give you a little insight about today's happenings."

I composed myself, though it was a chore to do so. "He kind of already did," I said.

She laughed again. "Yeah, but probably in that Edward way of his, where he carefully sidesteps important details."

She had a point. He did tend to choose his words carefully.

"When you bit him—" She stopped abruptly, perking to listen. "Butt out, Edward," she said to the ceiling. She then looked at me and smiled. "When you did that, he… _really_ enjoyed it."

I just blinked back at her stupidly. Her smile widened.

"Try to follow me, Bella. If I say the words, you're liable to burst into flames."

I wanted to catch her meaning, if for no other reason than because I wanted the conversation to be over with, but I just wasn't grasping it.

"Okay," she said. She seemed to be resigning herself to a different approach. "Human men and vampire men have a similar reaction when… _excited_. You know, the grand finale of intimacy?"

Oh, God. I understood her then, but I really wished I hadn't. I dropped my hands onto the counter and my forehead onto them. Then I groaned.

"Yeah," she said. I could hear the smile in her tone. "He's pretty upset with himself about that. But he shouldn't be. And you shouldn't be embarrassed. It's only natural."

I had never wanted to die more in my entire life. At least when Mom had discussed the facts of life with me, it had been about the basics only. About some unnamed man in my distant future. There was no boyfriend waiting upstairs, listening to every word being said, like there was now.

"Fine, fine. You're probably right," she said. I knew she was talking to Edward. "He thinks we should end this conversation now."

I couldn't have agreed more. But going up to see him would be just as mortifying as continuing it.

"He's uncomfortable, too, okay? He thinks he's wronged you in some way. He hates himself right now. You guys'll be okay. Just go crawl into bed and have a nice chat, right? Things will seem much better after you do."

I wasn't so sure I believed that, but I took her advice anyway. I avoided eye contact as I nodded, then I did with Emmett and Jasper as well, as I passed them on my way to the stairs.

Edward was standing in the middle of his bedroom, near the bed, watching me as I entered. I glanced at him, but avoided his eyes, too.

I pointed at my toiletry bag and pile of nightclothes. "I just need a minute," I said. I could see him nod out of my peripheral vision.

I moved as fast I could. I grabbed my stuff, then nearly ran out the door and into the bathroom.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

So, what did we think? I have this waking nightmare, imagining people are all: That's it? Well, that was disappointing.

I'm sorry if it was.

Responses:

Heathw: Thank you. There will be some angst in this fic, but not the kind that comes from life or death escapes. In fact, in a chapter coming up, there are two lines within a scene that, when I wrote them, made me cry.

AJ04-Jtrs98: Thanks for all the great reviews! I'm glad you're enjoying the story!

ADarnell: TMI, LOL!

I responded to Brookieo in a private message, but in case others are curious, I'll show my response to her here: Edward is a tortured individual. The fact that he 'almost' was enough to upset him. Plus, that's not the only thing he's lamenting right now.

Bella didn't make the decision to bite until a second before. Alice had no time to warn Edward, because they weren't close enough to Alice for him to read her thoughts. She can see visions about people all over the planet. Edward's abilities are limited to a certain mile radius.

Quick question: Do people have a preference of what time of day I post the chapters? Give your time zone when responding, please, so I know what time that is for me.

Thanks for all the great reviews and support! Keep 'em coming, please! (smile)

MTLBYAKY


	26. Chapter 26

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Twenty-Six

By: Jana~

**XXX**

This wasn't that big of a deal, right?

I tried to convince myself of that, but I just couldn't. And I was working myself up into a full blown panic attack.

But _why_ was it such a big deal? I couldn't wrap my brain around an answer to that. I just knew that my heart was racing and my breathing was completely and erratically off the charts.

If I didn't calm the hell down, Edward would likely bust through the door to be sure I was okay. I knew he could hear me freaking out.

I did the best I could to push Alice's revelation out of my head as I moved through my nighttime routine, but as I was finishing up, a new wave of adrenalin hit me. I would have to face Edward eventually. Soon. I couldn't _live_ in his bathroom.

I gathered up my crap, stared at the door for seven years, then unlocked it and took a step out into the hall. Straight into Edward.

"Crap! Sorry!" I nearly shouted at him from the surprise of it.

When I looked up at him, I recoiled. He was in agony again.

"I should not have agreed to her speaking with you. I'm _so_ sorry."

I shook my head. "I'm okay," I said.

His eyes narrowed a little. "You promised you wouldn't lie to me about your mental wellness."

"I'm not _lying_. I'm just… not sure what's wrong."

"You have every right to be upset with me." His expression was back to anguished.

"I'm not upset with you," I told him. His eyes narrowed again. He looked incredulous. I couldn't blame him, really. I would think I was lying, too, if I were him. "I admit, I'm _something_, but upset isn't it."

Shifting past him, I headed for his room. He followed. I threw my stuff at my suitcase before flinging myself onto the bed.

Irritation bubbled up. Determining my own feelings and emotions had never been difficult before! Why was it now?

He sat on the bed with me, but to the farthest edge that he could without falling off onto the floor.

"I just need a minute to think," I whispered. But, really, I didn't believe things would be any clearer in a minute. Maybe in a few hours, but to leave him in limbo like that for so long… he would try to hang himself. He would fail, of course, because I seriously doubted that a vampire could die so easily, but still. I didn't want to do that to him. What Alice said was obviously true. He was hating himself.

I have no idea how much time passed. It could have been days, for as much as I was aware. It felt like I was in a fog.

But eventually, I thought, and considered, and reasoned my way through it.

And then I sighed. "That's about as close to truly intimate as we're ever going to get, isn't it? Anything… _further_… because you feel you'll lose control, is out of the question."

"Yes."

"I think that's what's bothering me the most," I admitted. "We're _so_ limited, yet you want to pull _that_ away, too! Yeah," I added, "I was embarrassed because _Alice_ was the one to tell me what was going on…" I heard Emmett laugh at that. "Shut up, Emmett," I muttered. I rolled my eyes when he laughed again. "But now I'm just frustrated. Why make this harder than it needs to be? If we have… _restrictions_ we need to work within, let's work within them!"

"So, you're not appalled that I acted so shamefully, but you _are_ upset because I don't want to dishonor you by repeating it?"

"How did you dishonor me?"

Emmett laughed again.

"Shut up, Emmett!"

Edward and I both said this, at the exact same time. That broke the tension a little. We both smiled at each other.

"You didn't dishonor me, Edward." His smile dropped, then mine did, too. "Did you imagine that we would never want to have something like that? I don't know about _you_, but _I've_ sure thought about it."

Okay, Emmett was at serious risk of being murdered. "Edward," I asked in an icky sweet tone of voice, "exactly how does one kill a vampire? There's one on my hit list right now."

Emmett roared with laughter. Edward smirked, then I did, too, but we both dropped them quickly.

"You keep talking about acclimation," I continued, "but how can we if we don't _try_?"

"There are some situations we should avoid trying. The ones that could get you killed, or worse, for example."

"What's worse than death?"

That was a very bad question. He looked as if he was enduring the worst form of torture a captor had ever inflicted upon a prisoner. He pushed off the bed and walked over to the window wall. For a moment, I thought he was going to leap out of it and run off, but he didn't.

I joined him. He tensed when I did, but he still didn't move to leave.

"Okay, let's drop that for now," I said. "Maybe the only reason you tried to kill me today, was because you weren't expecting it, and because you haven't acclimated yet. We could wait a while. We could try again, but start simpler. Maybe no biting. See how it goes."

He sighed deeply. "Physical intimacy is important to you, isn't it?"

I hadn't really thought about it before. It sure seemed to be. "Yeah," I said. "I mean, I get that we'll have… limitations, but _some_ form of it would be nice."

"I would like you to understand something." He turned to look at me then. His tortured expression had eased considerably. "I was born in a different era. Things were a lot less… complicated. If I had met you back then, I would have courted you. We would have taken chaperoned strolls, and had ice tea on the porch. I may have stolen a kiss or two."

Wait. "Okay, so, this isn't just about you losing control? It's about… propriety?" His return expression answered my question. I sighed. "Great. Now I feel like the villain here, trying to steal your virtue."

"It's not my virtue I'm concerned about."

That surprised me. Why on earth would he be concerned about mine? I was born in _this_ era. And I obviously didn't have any qualms about behaving like a wanton slut.

"I know this is not a very modern notion," he said.

"It's bordering on ancient, Edward, but I get where you're coming from." I turned away from him and headed back towards the bed. I asked as I dropped onto the edge, "Where does that leave us?"

"I only want for your happiness, Bella."

Translated: I'll sacrifice my morals if you want me to. Yeah, I was not okay with that.

"And I want for yours. So, where does that leave us?" I asked again.

"If you are accepting of a compromise, I will give you whatever physical intimacy I am capable of, and comfortable giving you."

So, essentially, I would have to let _him_ lead. Why did falling in love with a vampire have to be so complicated?

"I'm accepting," I said. Then I pushed up fully onto the bed. "I'm also exhausted. This was a very long day."

I didn't even look at him as I patted the empty space beside me. I felt him climb in, then I turned and snuggled up to him. I didn't even bother getting under the covers. I was too tired to move, and I knew if I got cold later, Edward would tuck me in.

"How do you kill vampires?" I asked again. I heard several of the Cullen clan laugh that time.

"You would not be strong enough to accomplish the task, my love. Sleep. I will kill Emmett later."

More laughter. I smirked, but it faded as I drifted off to sleep.

"Get up, get up, get up! It'll be here soon!"

Alice's chipper voice roused me, but I didn't even open my eyes in response.

"What will be here?" I asked.

"The storm!"

"And I care about that, why?" I forced a smile from forming when I heard her laugh.

"Baseball!"

My eyes flew open. "Huh?"

"We're _all_ playing! _Edward_ is playing!"

I felt his arms tighten around me as he nuzzled into my hair.

"I don't play baseball," I told her.

She scoffed. "You are today! Get up, get up, get up!"

She then twirled out of the room. I shifted a little and snuggled in deeper against Edward.

"You remember the story I told you, right? About my misadventures trying to play softball?"

"Vividly. You could not injure us if you tried, my love. Relax."

"Since when do vampires like to play baseball?"

He chuckled a little. "Well, it _is_ a favorite American pastime."

I shrugged. I never much cared for it. Charlie sure did. The TV in our house was tuned to sports more so than anything else. "And the storm matters why?"

"You'll see."

Okay, vampire games are just way more fun than their human equivalents.

Every hit of the ball – which sounded like a crack of thunder; hence the need for the storm – was easily a homerun. Except it wasn't, especially when Edward was in the outfield. He was _fast_, and he could throw all the way to home plate from deep within the forest. It was dizzying to follow, let alone play.

They _made_ me play. I honestly didn't see the point. Everyone had to _humanize_ themselves while I was up at bat. I doubted I would have even been able to hit the ball if it wasn't for Edward standing with me, behind me. We both held the bat, but I basically just let him do all the work. His swings were more powerful than any human's would be, but far less than he was capable of.

And then the ball would go flying, and he would pull me up onto his back and run me through the bases. I liked participating for that reason alone.

When we were in the outfield, I just stood there and watched. Though that was fun, too, but only because Edward and Emmett made it so. Brotherly competition was alive and well in the Cullen clan. They were always trying to be the one to catch the ball – make the out – and they often crashed into each other in the process. And I mean _crashed_. Their bodies colliding sounded like thunder, too.

They didn't appear to be keeping score, other than the three outs required so that they could switch which team was up at bat.

Esme insisted, after about an hour and a half of playing, that I take a break and eat the snack she had prepared for me. I resisted the urge to define the word _snack_ to her. At least with them all caught up in the game, I wouldn't have to hide the fact that I couldn't possibly eat even a fraction of what was in the wicker picnic basket.

Edward sat out of the game with me.

"Are you having fun?" he asked.

"Yeah. I feel a little like a piece of equipment, though." I grinned at him so that he would know I was joking, then I chomped into my sandwich.

"We play a little rough. I don't want you to get hurt."

"Not to mention I wouldn't be able to keep up with you guys," I added.

"Yes, there is that consideration as well."

He inched closer to me, watching me eat with the most adoring expression on his face.

"How often do you guys play? I've probably heard you before, assuming it was the thunder."

"Not often. Two or three times per year."

I nodded. I'm not sure why, but it made me happy to think that during some of the many storms over the years, I had probably heard Edward playing vampire baseball.

"Rosalie hasn't glared at me once today," I mentioned. Edward shifted his eyes a little.

I had become fairly proficient at determining what his little quirks meant. The eye shifting thing usually meant he was reading someone's thoughts.

And then it dawned on me. Crap! How could I have forgotten that they all have super hearing? Rosalie must have heard my comment.

I tried to fix it, though I wasn't sure how to. "Sorry, it's just… I'm glad she's having a good time. That I didn't manage to upset her today."

His eyes were back on me. "Her problems are self created. You have done nothing wrong."

I had to force myself not to glance in Rosalie's direction. Knowing we were talking about her, I was sure she was glaring at me now.

I sighed in defeat and took another bite of my sandwich. I was just going to have to accept the fact that Rosalie was never going to like me. It was the not knowing why, though, that was most bothersome. I knew Edward wouldn't tell me, and asking her about it directly seemed like a very bad idea.

I changed the subject. "I see Emmett is still alive." I heard a soft chuckle behind me. Edward smirked.

"I spared his life in exchange for his promise to behave."

"That was very generous of you."

Another laugh. Emmett certainly didn't seem to share Rosalie's view of me. If nothing else, he found me to be amusing. Sometimes his amusement was annoying, but really, I liked him. We seemed to have slipped into the role of siblings. The kind that both irritate and love one another.

I smiled at that.

"What are you thinking?"

I looked up at Edward. He was smiling, too.

"Emmett. He's kind of like a cuddly teddy bear." Edward quirked his eyebrow; I hid my grin. "Like a big, lethal, cuddly teddy bear."

The field erupted into laughter. And then Emmett was sitting right beside me.

"You got the lethal part right," he said, grinning at me. "Are you guys ever coming back to play?"

I gestured to my half-eaten sandwich. "Human moment," I said. "I'm sure you'll do fine without me. You can have Edward back, if you need the help."

Emmett laughed. "Like he'd leave your side! You guys are a packaged deal now!"

I didn't even have time to squeal. I was suddenly up off the ground, over Emmett's shoulder in a fireman's carry, my sandwich still in hand. Edward followed us with a smirk on his face. I returned it, then casually took another bite of my sandwich.

"He's met his match in you, little one," Emmett said. It was almost a whisper. There was really no need for him to lower his voice, though. Not only could Edward hear him, but I was sure he knew Emmett was going to say it before he did.

Emmett was obviously approving of our relationship. That made me feel good. I knew Alice was, which meant Jasper probably was, too. Esme seemed to be as well, based off our brief conversation Friday morning. Dr. Cullen was a bit of a mystery, but if everyone else was fine with things, I couldn't imagine he had any issues with it. He was the father-figure of the clan. If he was unhappy about my relationship with Edward, wouldn't the others take his cue?

Rosalie hated me, so of course she wouldn't like that I was with Edward. She probably didn't think I was good enough for him. I doubted she would care, but we were actually in agreement on that. I _wasn't_ good enough for Edward. But for as long as he wanted me, I would overlook that. I had to. I loved him too much to walk away.

I was on my feet, and then I felt a pat to my head. It didn't seem to be a condescending gesture, though.

"Keep him on his toes, little one," Emmett said. He smiled at me, and then, whoosh, and he was across the field from me.

Edward stepped up to beside me a second later. Wrapping his arm around my waist, he pressed his lips to my forehead and inhaled.

"Wake up! One more out and we're up at bat!"

"Shut up, Em."

Alice had said that. I didn't dare open my eyes. I just knew the entire family was watching us. I pushed the thought aside and gently scratched his hair at the nape of his neck. He liked that, if his soft hum was any indication.

"They're waiting for you," I whispered.

He chuckled a little, then pulled back and locked eyes with me. "A few minutes is nothing to a vampire, trust me. Let them wait."

I smirked. "But the storm doesn't care about that. Play. I'll just be standing here, eating my sandwich."

He hummed again, in amusement. "You enjoy that, then."

I laughed at that. He'd taken my own joking remarks from the other day and had teased me right back with them.

"That's the plan," I quipped. Then I shoved him, which he allowed by taking a graceful stumble backwards.

Rosalie was at bat. I noticed she seemed irritated that everyone's attention wasn't back on the game yet. It eased a bit when they returned to playing. She made it to third base. Then Dr. Cullen was up. I continued to eat my sandwich as I watched.

Crack, and the ball went flying, right over my head. It all happened insanely fast after I realized that.

Edward and Emmett rushed for the ball. The momentum of their speed as they passed me must have messed with my equilibrium, because next thing I knew, I was flat on my back looking up at the cloudy sky. In a split second of time, I had six vampires hovering over me.

On my right, Edward was kneeling next to me, on my left, Dr. Cullen was. Edward looked anguished again. Carlisle seemed to be in medical practitioner mode.

"I'm okay," I whispered. The wind had been knocked out of me, apparently. It was a struggle to speak normally. "I just lost my balance."

"Carlisle?" Edward said his name in a questioning manner, like he was asking his opinion.

"She doesn't appear to be injured," he answered. "Bella? Do you trust my diagnosis, or would you like us to take you to the hospital?"

I shook my head. "I'm fine." To prove that, I moved to sit up, but the head rush that created made me fall back to the ground.

Edward's concerned expression intensified.

"Maybe we should just take her home," Alice suggested.

Crap! "No! You guys don't have to stop playing! Really, I'm fine!"

"Bella…"

"Edward, stop it! You promised to try. I'm _o-kay_. Just help me over to the sidelines, and I'll watch from there. It's not like I was much more than a spectator anyway."

All eyes then shifted over to Edward. His remained on me.

"Edward…" I whispered his name, but sternly. "You _promised_."

Several long seconds passed before he nodded. "Would you like me to carry you, or would you prefer to walk?"

Emmett clapped a couple times, like he was excited that the game wasn't over. Dr. Cullen stood but remained nearby. Everyone else moved away, back into their playing positions.

"Just help me up. I can walk."

It was like I was walking, but really, my feet were barely touching the ground. Edward had his arm around my waist, but was lifting me in such a way that it seemed like gravity wasn't working.

He helped me to the ground next to the picnic basket, but then just hovered over me.

"Go play, Edward. I'm fine. I have snacks and everything," I added with a smirk.

He nodded. "I will make this up to you, I promise."

"There's nothing to make up. I don't mind being a spectator. I excel at it, actually." I grinned at him, which finally earned me a smile in return. "Go. Before Emmett explodes."

Laughter. Even Edward laughed.

And then the game continued, as I munched on cheese, and fruit, and pretzels, and…

**To be continued…**

**Author's Note:**

I continue to be humbled by the amazing reviews. Thank you.

Some of my fave lines from _Eclipse_ are in this chapter. I was thrilled to be able to work them in.

The lines I wrote that made me cry are in chapter twenty-nine. I'll let everyone know what they are, after we play a little game of guess. (smirk) They will probably be obvious, though.

Responses:

ADarnell: LOL, verbal smackdown! Yeah, that was satisfying to write, and had been in planning since almost the start of my writing the fic. I am continuing to do well with the no smoking thing, thank you. Today at four-thirty P.M. will mark exactly two weeks since I have had a cigarette. Arms are still intact. (grin)

xxxbulletxxx: Bella does like that. She's embarrassed because Alice was the one to tell her what had happened. Hopefully, this chapter eased your confusion.

Brooke: To Bella, not to passersby.

Mrs. Edward B. Cullen: Thank you. You're forgiven. (smirk)

The fat cats meow: The epilogue chapter will make up for the shorter chapters now. It's freaking huge.

The next chapter has a funny little scene/moment that is one of my faves. The chapter after that (twenty-eight) is one of my faves of the entire series. Chapter twenty-nine is probably the most angsty. Just giving you an idea of what's to come.

In this chapter, I did try to avoid the vampire baseball scene being a regurgitation of the book/movie scene, but love the idea of it so much, I just had to throw it in. Minus the game being interrupted by annoying nomadic vampires, of course. Hopefully, I succeeded in making it different enough to be entertaining.

Please keep showing the love by reviewing! And MTLBYAKY


	27. Chapter 27

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Twenty-Seven

By: Jana~

**XXX**

After spending hours on the hard ground in the cold field, it felt good to be sitting on something soft. I think I actually moaned a little when I dropped my aching body onto Edward's bed. It felt good to be home.

And that's really what the Cullen house was starting to feel like. It signified safety, and warmth, and love, and acceptance. I felt a sense of inclusion, like I had always been a member of this family. Even Rosalie's dislike of me was starting to feel perfectly natural, not that I was happy about it, or any closer to understanding why she did.

But it seemed we all had effortlessly slipped into these roles. Dr. and Mrs. Cullen were like my surrogate parents. Protective, loving, guiding. Alice and I were like the two siblings who were also best friends. Emmett was the sometimes annoying and mischievous big brother, but you just knew he would take a bullet for you if it came down to it. Jasper was like a brother-in-law who feels awkward in your presence, but deep down loves and respects you.

And Edward…

I smiled back at him as he watched me from his bedroom doorway.

He was _everything_. Every breath. Every beat of my heart. Every reason I was even born.

"What are you thinking?"

"Good thoughts," I answered. Then I patted the space beside me in an invitation for him to join me. He did.

"You're tired."

"Physically. I'm not sleepy, though."

"My causing you to fall is mostly to blame. I promised to make it up to you."

I rolled my eyes. "I told you, you don't have to make anything up to me. It was an accident."

"Please, Bella, allow me this. Anything you want, it's yours."

An evil little thought jumped into my brain. "Anything? You promise?"

"Yes."

It took me a moment to gather my courage. Finally, I leaned in and pressed my lips to his. He seemed surprised at first, but then he started responding. I braved forward.

I started brushing a path to his neck, but I didn't get very far. He pushed away from me, creating several inches of space between us.

"Bella, no."

So much for his promise. But I wasn't mad at him. It was a blind promise, and I had tried to take advantage of that. I was disappointed, though.

"It's fine if you don't want to," I muttered. I looked away and sighed.

"Believe me, I want to."

My eyes were back on him in an instant, searching his.

"But we can't," he added.

I had to try. I didn't care how pathetic my desperate pleading sounded. "Just try. I know you're worried, but you can do this. I know you can."

He sighed. "I appreciate your faith in me, but I won't take chances with your safety."

"If I promise not to bite?"

"No. I know you have needs, and I want to please you…" He sighed again as he trailed off.

"It's fine," I repeated, "but there's nothing else that I want."

Ridiculous, maybe, but true. I had already been given a taste of what intimacy with him could be like, and I was hungry for more. It was like giving that starving man on the brink of death one little bite of the barbequed steak, and then yanking it away from him.

"You're so stubborn."

The amusement in his tone annoyed me. I huffed in response. "So are you," I grumbled.

He wrapped his arms around me, resting his chin on my shoulder. I continued to scowl, though it was more for show than for any other reason. My anger had dissolved, but I didn't want him to know that.

"Is there anything I can do to earn your forgiveness?"

"You know there is. You're just unwilling."

Five years passed.

"I'm sorry, Bella."

He sounded it. The remorse in his tone was almost enough to make me cry. My façade crumbled. I threw my arms around him and clung to him.

"I know. I'm sorry for behaving like a wanton slut."

It was weird. My behavior. I never would have thought it possible. Sex was always at the bottom of my list of interests. Maybe not the very last entry, but close to it. Yet there I was, acting like a fiend for it. Shame washed over me like a tidal wave.

I pulled away from him, turned, and then curled up on the bed. Seconds later, I felt him spoon me.

"I don't think that, Bella." He started nuzzling my hair. "You deserve more than I can give you." His lips brushed against my ear. "I only want for your happiness." A soft kiss to my jaw.

Oh, God. Please. He was so close. _Please_.

My silent pleas were answered. My body exploded.

His kisses were tentative at first. Careful. But then he deepened them. His tongue left icy wet trails. His lips melded to my flesh. I forced myself not to pass out by sheer will alone. I was only vaguely aware that I was panting. My heart was aching from the adrenalin. My blood was near boiling. I still wanted more. I craned my neck, offering myself to him.

"No, Bella."

I couldn't wrap my brain around what had happened. I just knew I felt a sense of loss and confusion. Then I felt him press his forehead against my shoulder.

It took forever and three days for me to calm myself after that. And during the whole of that time, Edward continued to hold me.

"Acclimation," I finally whispered. "I didn't pass out this time."

He tightened his arms around me but said nothing in response. He seemed bothered by something. I could just sense it. But I wasn't brave enough to ask him about it. My inner voice told me not to. And since I vowed to listen to it more often…

"When will dinner be ready? It smells good."

Okay, yeah, that was lame, given the intensity we had just shared, but it was a truthful statement. One cannot live by snack foods alone, and since I had lost most of my sandwich in the outfield when I had gone kersplat…

"Soon. Would you like to freshen up first?"

Maybe he was upset because I had essentially manipulated him into giving me what I wanted. Guilt stabbed at me.

"Um, yeah. Okay. Good idea."

I awkwardly disentangled myself from his arms and moved to leave the bed. But before I could get to my feet, he reached out and slid his hand into my hair.

"I love you, Bella."

All my worries melted. I leaned into his touch. "I love you, too."

His lips brushed against mine in a gentle but brief kiss. And then I guess I stood and gathered up my crap, because the next thing I knew, I was walking down the hall towards the bathroom.

The shower felt good. Really good. I was starting to feel a little stiff and sore from my embarrassing moment of severe clumsiness out at the field.

I smiled at the memory of six concerned faces hovering over me. The only Cullen who hadn't whooshed to my side was Rosalie. I shook that thought from my brain. Dwelling on it wasn't going to change anything, anyway.

It wasn't hard to find something else to contemplate. My guilt had returned. I had agreed to his compromise the night before, but then at the first opportunity, I pressured him into testing his self-control and abandoning his morals.

The words 'manipulative bitch' came to mind. Because, really, that's what I was. Or, at least, that's how I had behaved. He deserved better than that.

I vowed, right there and then, under the warm spray of the shower, that I would never pressure him again. Even if that meant I would die a virgin.

I cringed a little at the thought of that, but my resolve held firm. My mind was made up. My inner seductress had caused enough trouble. She had to be stopped.

I literally startled when I entered Edward's bedroom. I wasn't expecting to see anyone in there but Edward.

Alice's pixie face cracked a smile. "Edward's just… off thinking somewhere. He'll be back."

I shook off my surprise and threw my crap down on the floor by the bed. "Is that code for hunting?"

She laughed. "No. I thought we should have another chat, and he didn't want to make you uncomfortable by being within earshot."

Fantastic. Another part of my soul was about to be murdered, I just knew it.

"I'm not so sure I'm strong enough to survive this," I muttered. I plopped down on the edge of the bed beside her.

"You will. I've seen it."

I rolled my eyes. "I meant figuratively."

"I know." She laughed again, and then she got serious. "I just want to help. You can tell me to butt out, though, if you don't want me to."

I sighed. Suddenly, confiding in Alice didn't seem like such a bad idea. "He deserves better than the crap I pulled on him today."

"You didn't do anything wrong."

Had she not been in the house when I copped a hissy fit and essentially _forced_ Edward to be affectionate with me?

"I broke my promise to him less than twenty-four hours after making it. I told him I was accepting of his… conditions. And then I go and pressure him to give me more than he was comfortable giving me."

"Trust me, he wanted to. He's just feeling conflicted because he did. He thinks he's encouraging you to be something you're not. Something he thinks you'll regret being later."

I was already regretting it. Being a horny teenager sucked. It was also very unbecoming. And Edward thought _he_ was driven by instincts.

"He doesn't have to worry about that," I said. Alice raised her eyebrows at me. I assumed she wanted me to elaborate. "I'm done being that person. I'm done acting foolish, throwing myself at him. If he never wants to touch me again… that's fine."

"His misplaced propriety isn't the problem. Well, it isn't the _only_ problem."

"I know. He's also worried about his self-control. And I get that! But I think he's stronger than he thinks he is. He's just _so_ protective of me, because he sees me as this frail little human, that he isn't willing to put any faith in himself."

She sighed as she put her arm around me. "I think you should have a chat with Edward about some stuff."

"I _have_ talked with him about it."

"You should have another one."

I honestly didn't see the point. We would just end up going around in circles. But she was just trying to be helpful, so I left all of that unsaid.

"Thanks," is what I said instead.

She gave my shoulders a gentle squeeze, and then she was back to her bubbly self.

"Your dinner is ready! And then after that, I want to play dress-up with you again!" She stood, grabbed my hands, pulled me up to join her, and then she dragged me out of the room. "I hear you're going to prom!"

I groaned. "_If_ I go, it will be as a spectator."

"Spectators need to look nice, too! I have the perfect dress for you! And I'll do your hair and makeup and—"

We were halfway down the stairs when I heard his voice.

"Alice. Enough."

She didn't even hesitate in her strides as we passed him. She just huffed and continued to pull me along with her. "You've monopolized all of her time since she's been here, Edward. This is her last weekend here. _I_ get her tonight! Go chase grizzlies with Emmett."

I startled hard at that. My feet struggled to keep up with her momentum.

"Don't worry," she said – she obviously caught the meaning behind my concerned stumble, "it would be like _you_ chasing after a kitten."

I glanced behind me. Edward was following. He was both scowling and smirking.

Dinner, of course, was perfect. Edward and Alice joined me – not in eating, naturally – while Esme puttered about the kitchen. She wore a slight smile the entire time.

I only gave Alice my partial attention as she chattered on about makeup and clothes. I picked up enough to feel dread about the evening, though. Apparently, the last time she had 'played' with me, she had scaled her talents back considerably. Tonight, I wasn't going to fair so lucky.

Edward protested a few times on my behalf, but Alice just blew him off. Their bantering seemed to make Esme's smile grow a little wider.

As soon as I was done eating – and I mean _as soon as_ – Alice jumped from her seat and announced, "Say goodbye, Edward! She's _mine_ for the next three hours!"

Edward let out a little growl in response. Alice just laughed.

"Can I have a moment to say goodbye to him properly, at least?" I asked.

She smiled back at me. "Yeah, sure. I'll be up in my room waiting." Then she turned and faced Edward. "But I'm watching your decisions! Don't try anything! I won't give up so easily this time."

When she left the room, so did Esme.

"I'll take you to Canada, if need be. Just say the word."

I laughed as I shook my head. "No, it's fine. Alice is fun." I heard a delighted squeal from upstairs. "You're welcome," I said to the ceiling.

"I won't be gone long," he whispered as he gathered me into his arms. "I'm not going with Emmett. Rosalie is. I'm staying nearby with Jasper." He added seconds later, in a slightly louder volume of voice, "Behave, Alice."

He sighed a moment after that. I assumed it was in response to whatever Alice had said. Then he pulled back and raked his hand into my hair. "I will make this up to you, I promise."

My heart shuddered into a faster rhythm. It was that kind of promise that had triggered my inexcusable behavior earlier.

"What's wrong?" he asked. His expression turned into a worried scowl.

"Nothing," I lied. "It's just, you don't need to make anything up to me. Alice and I get along. We'll be fine. Go. Have fun."

He quirked an eyebrow at me. He didn't seem to be disbelieving of what I had said, but instead was amused. Inside my head, I replayed what I had just babbled.

Oh.

"Is that not the right term? Isn't hunting a fun activity?"

"It can be. As much as eating is for you." He smiled briefly, but it dropped almost as quickly as it had shown itself. "Thank you. I shall."

And then he leaned in and kissed me.

It was perfect. Too perfect. How was I supposed to control my teenage hormones when he _lured_ me like that?

It took me years to open my eyes again after I felt his lips leave mine. When I finally did, he was smiling at me.

"Three hours." I could tell that he was speaking to Alice, even though his attention remained on me. His tone was a little curt.

He rolled his eyes towards the ceiling, then he dropped his hand from my face and left. I just stood there, stuck on stupid… until Alice grabbed me by the arm and started dragging me towards the stairs.

"C'mon!" she chirped. "We don't have much time!"

I looked ridiculous. Like I was trying to be a fashion model but had failed miserably in the attempt.

But Alice was happy, at least. Mercifully, she avoided the subject of Edward and sex for the entire time she tortured me. Instead, she regaled me with story after story of _her_ high school days.

She could not have been more obvious. Every tale ended with: That is a great memory. Or: I am so glad I did that.

She wanted me to go to prom. Not with _her_, but just, in general, she didn't want me to miss out on it.

"Alice," I sighed, "dances to the uncoordinated are like heights to the Acrophobic."

She grinned back at me. "Edward is a great dancer."

That didn't surprise me. He was great at everything. He also had the grace of a dancer. But, then again, so did all the Cullens. It was probably a vampire thing.

"That's because he's not uncoordinated," I said in response.

She laughed at that. She knew we were now both playing the game she had started.

"Being uncoordinated doesn't matter so much, when you have a good partner."

"Nobody wants to partner up with the uncoordinated."

"Except for the partners that are hoping to teach the uncoordinated."

Her smile grew huge when my heart stuttered. Was she saying what it sounded like she was saying? Edward wanted to take me to the prom? I mean, I knew _she_ wanted Edward to take me, but did _he_ want to take me?

"Sometimes, uncoordinated people can't be taught."

She scoffed a little. Her smile remained. "Maybe some teachers aren't as good as others."

"Maybe the uncoordinated aren't very good learners."

She laughed again. "Or, maybe, the uncoordinated are just being stubborn."

That got a chuckle out of me. "Maybe," I said.

I think she thought that she'd won our game. She nodded once, absolutely. Then her eyes sort of glazed over for a moment. I was just about to become concerned when she snapped out of it and smiled at me.

"Edward will be back soon. You should go change. It's bad luck for the man to see his date in her prom dress before the dance."

"I think you're thinking of brides and grooms and weddings."

The smile took over her face. I turned a thousand shades of red in response. And then I turned a thousand more.

"We have a little while before we have to worry about that one."

Wait. Shit. Had Alice seen something in a vision? Or was she just messing with me?

"Hurry up," she said. She helped me to my feet – yanked me to them, more accurately – and then she nudged me towards the door.

No. Wait. I wanted to know.

No, I didn't.

Yes, I did.

Shit!

I spun around three times in my confusion. Alice laughed hard at that.

"The bathroom's that way." She pointed for emphasis.

I didn't think there would be enough time, so I resigned myself to the fact that I wasn't going to know for sure if she was messing with me or not. I grabbed my clothes from her outstretched hand and ran to the bathroom.

Alice wasn't in her room when I went to go return the dress, so I placed it gently on her bed. Then I headed for Edward's room.

That was why she wasn't in her room. She was in his. And so was he. She grinned at me when I entered. He looked serious.

"I can… go away… if you guys want to have a private conversation… or something." I stammered over my words because it seemed like I was interrupting something.

"We're done," Alice said. She started humming quietly to herself as she danced out of the room.

Edward softened a little. "I'm sorry if she made you uncomfortable."

"She didn't. We had a good time." His eyes narrowed. "What? I'm telling the truth."

He smirked as he shook his head. Then he lowered himself onto the edge of the bed. I joined him.

"Did _you_ have a good time?" I asked.

"Yes. Jasper and I had a… good conversation."

He hesitated. But I didn't have any time to decipher why. He pulled me up against his side, and then, suddenly, he was kissing me.

Oh, God, was he kissing me. And then we were reclining. He was still careful where his hands wandered, but he seemed to be risking a little advancement. A little further here. A little closer there.

My body exploded. I was engulfed in flames. His cool skin felt perfect against the heat.

Whatever the hell Jasper had said to him, I was thankful for it.

I grabbed at him desperately. Encouragingly. I was _not_ going to push him. I would let him take it as far as felt he could.

Which turned out to be farther than we had ever taken things before.

He tilted his head, offering himself to me. My lips were on his neck within a second.

I kissed, nibbled, licked, sucked. Eagerly. Frantically. And then I bit.

He growled, low in his throat, pulling me tighter to him as he did.

I could… _feel_ him. My head spun. But it came crashing back to reality when all contact was suddenly removed.

Edward had pushed away from me. His eyes were… angry.

"I have _no_ control!"

What happened? I was fine. He was nowhere near my neck. Nowhere near killing me.

The ability to articulate words was lost. I said the first ones that came into my head. "What's wrong?"

He just scoffed, then he pulled himself into a sitting position, to the edge of the bed. I clamored up behind him and wrapped my arms around his neck.

"I'm sorry. I thought you wanted me to."

He was silent for several long seconds.

"There is something I need to tend to. Please excuse me."

He gently removed my arms from around him, stood, marched over to his closet, and then ripped a pair of slacks from off a hanger. He did this with such force, the plastic shattered, raining the pieces of it onto the floor.

He ignored it as he stormed out the door and down the hall.

I dropped my face into my hands for a few moments, frustrated, then I moved to pick up the mess. Just as I was finishing, Edward walked back into the room.

"Bella, you don't have to do that. Please…" His tone was calmer. Sweeter. I didn't care.

"Fine! _You_ want to do it? Here!" I threw the pieces up into the air. Before they could even hit the floor, I spun around and stomped over to the window wall.

I dropped myself down near the edge, cross-legged. Then I just fumed as I stared out at the dark forest.

He joined me less than a minute later.

"You have every right to be angry with me."

"Thanks for your permission," I snapped. "But here's the problem… I'm not angry with you for the reason you think I should be angry with for!"

Emmett laughed from somewhere downstairs. Great.

"Emmett, I swear, don't start," I said into the air. Then I asked Edward, "When did he get back?"

"A few minutes ago," he answered.

I threw the subject away. "I'm not exactly angry with you. I'm frustrated. That was… _good_. _Really_ good. And then you go and make me feel guilty for thinking that."

Why did he have to be so damn moral?

"I'm sorry, Bella. It wasn't my intention to make you feel guilty."

"If you're going to torture yourself every time you— _that_ happens, then we may as well not do it at all! I don't want to be the reason why that look is on your face."

"You're not the reason. I am."

Ugh! Frustrating! Man!

"Okay, then, answer me this… why? Exactly _why_ are you torturing yourself? Is it because you think you've wronged me somehow?"

"Yes."

He sounded miserable. It softened me a little.

"You didn't wrong me, Edward. I _liked_ it. Or I did until you bolted from the room."

"This was not supposed to be about me."

Wait. What? That was his problem? He wanted to be there for me, but ignore his own wants and needs?

"To _you_. To _me_, it's very much about you. It's about _us_. I can wait until you acclimate. I can accept that we'll have limitations on how far we take things. But I refuse to compromise on _that_. If _I_ get to… _feel good_, then so do you!"

His response was nonverbal. Apparently, we were done talking.

He moved slowly – not just slow for him, but _slow_ – as he scooped me up and took me back to his bed. His eyes remained on mine the entire time… until he leaned in and kissed me. It was the same as before – that same level of intensity – except for when his hands started roaming.

They were everywhere. _Everywhere_. They didn't stop at invisible, morally determined boundary lines this time.

I didn't care that my heart was pounding erratically. I didn't care that I couldn't breathe. I didn't care that every inch of my body was on fire.

Okay, I cared, but because I _liked_ that it was.

If I had ever doubted Edward's love for me, I didn't in that moment.

Every touch was perfect. Every caress took me to new heights.

Clothes were never removed. His hands never even went inside them. It was the most indecent level of propriety ever exhibited.

I think it made him nervous when I arched my back and gasped, because his movements slowed, but he caught on quick enough. And then I collapsed in an extinguished puddle of liquid mess.

We were silent for three eternities as we held each other. I was way too content to speak.

"Did I please you?"

Yeah, still couldn't talk. "Hmmm."

He chuckled, and it made me smile. Goofily. It stayed with me for centuries.

"Sleep now, my love. I know you're tired."

I hummed again, then did as he suggested.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

Again, thank you for the wonderful reviews.

Brooke: It would be hard for me to pick a favorite chapter. Every chapter has scenes I adore. But if I had to choose, I'd say, probably, eleven, twenty-eight, twenty-nine, and thirty-five (the epilogue). Chapter eleven because I felt it was an important aspect that had not truly been explored in the books/movies. Twenty-eight for a rather large scene that is just beyond sweet; I thoroughly enjoyed writing it. Twenty-nine for its angst. And thirty-five for… well, the emotions involved, for one, and because I got to write a few scenes I very much wanted to tackle.

You know what's fun? Having a theater all to yourself when watching a movie you love and have memorized. You can quote your fave lines and sing along with the songs without annoying people. The theater people don't even look at my tickets anymore. They just point down the hall and say: _Eclipse_ is still in theater fifteen.

This movie cannot come out on DVD fast enough.

Okay, I'm done babbling. Please review, and MTLBYAKY


	28. Chapter 28

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Twenty-Eight

By: Jana~

**XXX**

Sunday was my second favorite day of the week.

"Good morning, my love."

Or maybe it was about to become my first favorite.

"Hmmm," I hummed. I snuggled in deeper, my head comfortably on Edward's chest.

I felt lighter than air. Clouds weighed a million tons in comparison to me.

"You slept well."

He wasn't asking me. I answered anyway.

"Yeah, I did."

"Your dreams were pleasant."

Were they? I tried to remember them.

Nope. Gone.

"Probably," I said. "I fell asleep in a pretty good mood."

"You spoke my name several times."

I could hear the smile in his voice.

"I speak your name when I'm awake, too," I teased.

"It's different when you're asleep. It is the closest I can be to hearing your thoughts. When you're awake, you choose your words before speaking. When you're asleep, you speak without conscious consideration."

That made sense. I smiled as I slithered up his body a little.

"If you could read my mind, you'd know how very happy I am right now. Last night was the best night of my entire life."

"With the exception of when I upset you. I'm sorry that I did."

"That doesn't matter now." I dismissed his apology with a light kiss to his lips. "We worked it out."

"Hmmm." His hum could still – and probably would forever – make me melt. "The day is yours, my love. How do you wish to spend it?"

I grinned. "Surprise me." I kissed him quick one last time before hopping out of bed.

I rushed through my morning routine. I just couldn't wait to be back in Edward's presence. I wasn't even anxious about what surprise he had in store for me. I was just too happy to allow my old issues to surface.

If happiness were a crime, I would have been sentenced to death for sure.

What we had shared the night before went beyond all expectations. Went beyond any known words to describe it. It was sweet, passionate, perfect, intense. It was life changing. I actually felt different.

I looked different, as I stared at my reflection in the mirror. In eleven days time, I had changed into someone else. Someone who was _loved_. I wondered if anyone else would notice. My parents. My friends.

I didn't care. Let them notice. I was _happy_.

I bounded back towards Edward's room to put my stuff away. He wasn't there, but that didn't really surprise me. He was downstairs waiting for me. I knew he was.

I watched my steps as I descended to the first floor, then I nearly ran to the kitchen.

Yep. There he was, holding my chair out for me, wearing a perfect smile on his perfect face. I grinned back, then took my seat.

Breakfast was a mere necessity. I shoveled it.

"We have time, my love. Chew your food, please."

I didn't want to chew. Chewing took too much time. But I did it anyway, simply because he asked me to.

The house seemed quiet. I waited to take my next bite.

"Where is everyone?"

"Carlisle is at the hospital, Esme is grocery shopping, Alice and Jasper went for a stroll, and Emmett and Rosalie are working on your truck."

That last one surprised me. I stopped eating again.

"Rosalie is?"

"Yes. She is a very skilled mechanic. In some respects, more so than Emmett."

I quickly shoveled another forkful of French toast. I nearly swallowed it whole before asking, "Is she unhappy doing that for me?"

I couldn't think of a better way to phrase the question. If she hated me, then why would she help repair my piece of crap Chevy? Was someone _forcing_ her to?

"No. She's not unhappy. She enjoys a challenge, and your vehicle offers her that."

Well, okay. Yeah, I supposed that would be a good enough reason. Still seemed weird, though.

I shrugged it off and continued to inhale my food. When I just knew I wouldn't be able to hold another bite, I sighed and pushed the plate away. Edward seemed amused by that.

"I will clean up. You can brush your teeth now."

He knew my routine better than I did.

When I was done with that, after throwing my toiletry bag at my suitcase, I ran for the stairs. He was standing in the middle of the flight, waiting for me. He offered me his hand when I met up with him.

"Are you ready for your surprise?"

My heart skipped at least two beats. He smirked at that.

"I think so," I answered. I wasn't so sure I was. The anticipation of what it could be had me both excited and nervous.

He led me straight into the piano room.

Oh. Okay. I loved listening to him play. That was a good start to any day.

But as we approached the piano, he dropped my hand, then he moved the bench so that it was sitting long ways out.

Confused, I blinked up at him. He just smiled back at me. Then he gestured for me to sit. I did, still confused.

Was he expecting me to play? He was about to be sorely disappointed.

He straddled the bench, sitting behind me, me between his legs.

Okay, never mind. I would slam random keys for him, as long as we could stay in that position for a while.

His front pressed against my back as he leaned into me, and then his arms came up under mine. He rested his fingers on the keys.

"Place your hands on mine. Gently."

I did. And then I realized what he was planning.

When he started playing, I recognized the song instantly. One of my favorites. Track five.

My fingers slipped a few times at first, but soon I learned just the right amount of pressure to stay with him. If I closed my eyes, I could almost imagine that it was really me playing.

I know it might not sound like much, but trust me, it was _awesome_.

We played three songs like that, my lullaby being the last. Then he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me tighter against him. I melted, head back against his shoulder, eyes closed, and hummed.

"Now it's your turn."

Sure, okay. My turn for what?

"It's not terribly complicated, once you learn the notes."

My heart began racing when I realized what 'my turn' meant. He wanted to teach me to play.

I had never had any musical ability. Like dancing, I just didn't have the capacity to learn.

"Don't be nervous. We are going to start simply."

His left arm stayed around me, holding me. His right extended, his fingers gracefully settling on the ivory. Then he plunked out an old familiar song. _Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star_.

He played the song in its entirety once, then he started over, but played only the first three notes.

He asked me to copy it, so I did. Then he started over again, but added two more notes to the three. I copied him again.

The more notes he added, the more I messed up, but he never lost patience.

Hours later – or at least it felt like hours – I was able to play the entire song on my own. Once I had _mastered_ it, he helped me to my feet, turned the bench back the way it was supposed be, then gestured for me to sit back down.

When I did, he sat beside me.

"Don't concern yourself with what I'm doing," he said. "Just play it like you have been."

I started it off, and then he joined in, playing the lower keys to my left. The melody and harmony mixing together made the simple song sound like a masterpiece.

We had just played a duet!

I grinned over at him. Sure, it wasn't like I had just played one of his magnificent compositions, but still!

He stood first, before offering me his hand and helping me to my feet. Then I was in his arms.

"Did you enjoy that?" he whispered.

I nodded against him. "Thank you."

He kissed the top of my head, inhaling deeply. Several long seconds passed.

"You should eat. We are going on a trip soon."

"We are?" I asked. He nodded. "To where?"

"It's a surprise, my love."

My lunch was waiting for me on the counter. I didn't even know anyone was home. Vampires were really quiet when they wanted to be.

I ate as much as I could, but I was sure not to overdo it. If we were going to be running, I didn't want to hurl.

But we weren't going to be running, apparently. After lunch, Edward led me into the garage.

Okay, I hadn't seen the garage yet, I realized, as we entered the huge attached building off the house. There were three cars parked in there besides my truck, and there was still room for one more.

We passed a very rough and tumble looking jeep, a red convertible, and a fancy BMW sedan on our way to my very out of place, rusted out Chevy.

"You're all set here," Emmett said. He looked very pleased. "I think she'll be safe even for _you_."

I smirked back at him. "Ha, ha. I'm a safe driver."

He laughed. "As long as you're not chewing gum?"

I was just about to retort, when Rosalie came sliding out from underneath. She locked eyes with me for a moment, then looked away almost as quickly.

"You should change your oil every three thousand miles."

"Um, thanks. I will." I sounded as awkward as I felt.

Edward put his arm around me and led me to the driver's door.

"Where would you like to go?" he asked me as he gestured for me to get in.

I didn't want to go far, but I was excited about driving. I missed my truck. "Just around town," I answered as I slipped into the seat.

He smiled before rounding the vehicle in the flash of a second and climbing in on the passenger side. The garage door opened automatically.

I mostly just drove around in circles. My truck had never run or sounded better. Instead of groaning, she purred. Instead of rattling at forty-five miles per hour, she sang. It was the new tires against the road, I realized.

"You will be safe now. This pleases me."

I smirked, but kept my eyes on the road.

Eventually, we took the truck to my house. His Volvo was parked at the curb. One of the Cullens probably brought it over, then ran back home.

When we got back to his place, instead of going inside, we walked hand in hand into the forest. I honestly didn't care where we were, as long as we were together.

After walking for a while – it certainly would have been faster if we had run – I noticed a pile of blankets by a tree. He led me straight to them.

He dropped my hand and laid out one of them, then he gestured for me to join him. He took the second blanket and wrapped it around us as we snuggled in. He was leaning against the trunk of the enormous tree, I was leaning against him.

"This day could not be more perfect. Thank you."

"I'm pleased you have enjoyed it. I want to please you."

There was something in the way he said that. His voice was soft. Husky. Seductive. My heart began to race.

I took in a shaky breath when he shifted and his eyes met mine.

God, he loved me. _Really_ loved me.

Every touch was as slow and gentle as the first, like he was memorizing my body for future reference. Each kiss was soft and adoring. I ascended to new heights one significant increment at a time. It was so perfect, so intense, I almost started to cry.

When he moved towards my neck – or at least that's where I thought he was headed – I offered myself to him.

His movements stopped. "No, Bella," he whispered against my ear.

I descended a little. Disappointment shot through me. I was too dazed, too aroused, to reason. Why had he stopped?

But then I quickly gained the ground I had lost. His hands, his fingers, were caressing me again. Drug Edward flowed through my veins once more.

I sighed his name as I tensed and arched my back. He smiled against my temple. Then I collapsed to the blanket beneath me.

As I recovered, he inhaled my scent and placed gentle kisses in my hair. He murmured 'I love you' six times. I counted.

When I felt I was ready to return the favor, I sat up a little and moved to straddle him. But he stopped me.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

His smile turned sweet. Almost apologetic. "Not now, my love. Soon. Just rest."

He encouraged me back into my original position. I was confused, and a little disappointed, but I didn't fight him on it.

I didn't remember falling asleep. I just remembered waking up, in Edward's arms, the sun on the edge of setting.

I bolted upright. Or, at least, that was the action Edward stopped from happening.

"Edward! I—"

"Shhh, love. You're fine. You're safe."

I felt safe. Absolutely. "But I wasted— How long have I been asleep?"

"One hour and thirty-six minutes."

That was one hour and thirty-six minutes of time we would never get back. I huffed, irritated with myself.

"We will have the rest of your life together, my love. One and a half hours is but a blink in time. Shhh."

How could a shushing sound be so sexy? I settled in and relaxed.

"Is it 'soon' yet?" I asked. "I wanted to… reciprocate."

"No."

A thought inched in. I pulled back – he allowed me to – and eyed him suspiciously. "You're going to let me reciprocate at some point, right?"

He smiled a little, but it looked a bit sad. Or at least his eyes did. "Yes."

"Something's wrong." I just knew there was. "What aren't you telling me?"

"As uncomfortable as it is with my family around, I would rather be home when… you reciprocate."

That surprised me. "Why?"

"An added safety precaution."

I caught on almost instantly to what he meant by that. If he felt he was about to lose control, his family would intervene.

I sighed and settled back against him. "You're stronger than you give yourself credit for."

"My strength is precisely what I'm concerned about."

I rolled my eyes. "You know what I mean. You won't hurt me, Edward."

"Bella…" He whispered my name, almost sighed it, and then he added seconds later, "I'm trying."

A pang of guilt hit me, but that turned into an overwhelming urge to comfort him. I held him tighter and kissed his chest.

"I know. Thank you."

He kissed my hair. "Would you like to go home now? Dinner will be ready soon."

I nodded against him.

After he helped me to my feet, just as he was preparing to help me onto his back, I glanced over at the blankets. "Aren't we—?"

"No."

I fought not to laugh. Apparently, blankets, like dishes, were disposable to the Cullens.

Emmett wanted to hear every detail about how my truck drove. He seemed quite pleased with himself. He chattered about the different things that he had fixed and 'tweaked', but he might as well have been speaking Greek, for as well as I was able to understand. I just nodded along.

Dinner was perfect as usual. Only Edward sat with me. Alice was busy with Jasper, apparently. I didn't ask what they were busy doing, though I had a strong inkling what the answer was. There was just something in the way Edward would occasionally wince.

I wondered if the rest of his family winced like that when they heard _us_ together.

I showered after dinner, then Edward and I retired to his bedroom. As I sat on the bed, he stood by his desk. It made me curious.

"I don't wish to make you uncomfortable…" He trailed off, then turned his back on me. When he faced me again, his hands were behind him. "I have a present for you."

I was just about to protest…

"Please," he whispered. He almost sounded like he was begging me. Like if I rejected the gift, it would be like I was rejecting _him_.

How could I say no? Uncomfortably, reluctantly, I reached out and nodded.

I almost didn't want to open it. Not because I was afraid of what was inside, but because the wrapping was so elegant, it seemed like a crime to rip it. So I didn't. I carefully slipped my finger under each taped fold until the box within was finally freed. I literally gasped when I lifted the lid.

The bracelet appeared to be made of white gold, and attached to it was a clear crystal heart pendant. At least I hoped it was crystal. If it was a diamond, it would have cost millions.

"Please," he said again. Then he gently removed the piece of jewelry from its box and held it out to me, like he was asking permission to put it on me.

I raised my arm. "Please tell me this isn't a diamond." He just grinned as he clipped it around my wrist. "Edward, seriously, tell me it's not. Lie to me if you have to."

"It's not a diamond, my love. I suspected such a gift would make you uncomfortable."

I sighed with relief. Then I settled my attention on the, what I assumed to be, symbolic heart, taking in its beauty. "Thank you," I whispered.

He seemed pleased. Happy. And not just because I liked it.

After eleven days, he already knew me so well. He knew my first inclination would be to refuse his gift. I almost did. I was glad I didn't. But it's hard to receive when you have nothing to give in return.

As I admired it, he sat beside me, right up against me, his arm encircling my waist. And then he got affectionate.

Brushing my hair back behind my ear, he began nuzzling and planting gentle kisses. On my temple, my cheek, my ear. My breath caught in anticipation when I thought he was heading for my neck. I tilted my head a little, hopefully, but he didn't take the cue. I didn't have time to feel disappointed for long.

As soon as his lips touched mine, tentatively, I threw my arms around his neck and pulled myself into him. That got a reaction out of him. He intensified the kiss, and then we were reclining.

I wasn't as brave as he was, it seemed. I explored his body, running the tips of my fingers across his chest, his abdomen, his thigh… but I couldn't bring myself to venture into unchartered territory.

My hand slid up to the safety of his arm. I could feel his smile against my lips. But when he pulled back, there wasn't the slightest hint of amusement within his expression. His eyes bore into my soul, and then he tilted his head away from me, exposing his neck.

I took in a shuddery breath, excited, and leaned in.

His hold on me became urgent. His fingers tangled into my hair. He moaned loudly several times. God, that was a _good_ sound. It ignited me from the inside out.

When I bit down, he tensed, pressing his body firmer into mine. I could _feel_ him again, hard against me. He felt _good_.

And then he growled like I had never heard him growl before. He wasn't holding back. He was allowing himself to enjoy it. My adrenalin spiked with the thought of it.

Then he relaxed himself. His hold on me became gentle. Loving.

"I will need to excuse myself for a moment, my love. I won't be long."

I nodded, hazy from my bliss.

I almost didn't have time to miss him. He couldn't have been gone more than forty-five seconds.

He wrapped me in his arms, then sighed. He sounded content.

So was I. I didn't even care if he reciprocated. I just basked in the peaceful afterglow.

"I don't want to go to school tomorrow. Don't worry, I will," I added quickly, before he could scold me. "I just don't want to."

He laughed. "You will go," he said, almost as if he was ordering me to. I didn't care. "I will not be the reason why your education suffers."

A yawn escaped me, and he laughed again. "Such a frail, sleepy little human. Rest now, my dearest Bella. I will be here when you wake up in the morning."

I opened my eyes just long enough to remind myself of the beautiful crystal heart around my wrist, and then I closed them again and succumbed to sleep.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Note:**

Okay, the reason why this is one of my fave chapters, is for the piano scene. My fave line in this chapter is: Okay, never mind. I would slam random keys for him, as long as we could stay in that position for a while.

It's a cool thing when you can write something that makes you laugh.

The next chapter is the angsty one, and includes the two lines that brought me to tears as I wrote them.

I got an idea for another fic last night (or in the wee hours of this morning, more accurately), but I'm not sure if I can make it work. I'll keep you posted.

Still not smoking, for those who are following my progress with that.

Thank you so much for the reviews and support.

MTLBYAKY


	29. Chapter 29

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Twenty-Nine

By: Jana~

**XXX**

I'd never been one to have nightmares. Sure, as a kid, I'd had a few, but really, they were almost laughable. Giant spiders trying to trip me as I ran from them. Monsters in tutus pirouetting as they chased me.

I'd had those latter ones during my year of dance lessons.

But the nightmare I'd just had made all others seem like fluffy children's stories.

I was standing in a field with Edward beside me. I was happy… at first. The sun was peering through the trees, illuminating his skin, dancing off of him like he was made of diamonds.

He looked at me so adoringly, with such love and affection. I smiled back at him, my breath catching a little as he took my hand and raised it to his lips to kiss the knuckles.

But then I looked – really looked – at my own hand. It was wrinkled. Covered in age spots. _Old_.

I startled, staring back at Edward in shock. His expression never changed.

Then I noticed a mirror to my right. I recognized Edward, but the grandmotherly woman beside him…

She almost looked a little like my Gran. Same eyes, but there was just something not quite the same about her.

And then it hit me. My eyes shot up to Edward's. His smile changed a little. Sad. Wistful.

"Happy birthday, Bella."

My eyes flew open then. Stunned, confused, I reached out for Edward in the dark, but the bed beside me was empty.

I needed to see him. I needed to find him. I fell out of bed and headed for the hall.

I don't know why I was tiptoeing. It wasn't like I could have been disturbing someone's sleep.

I was halfway down the stairs when I heard his voice. I almost ran to him. But then I heard Alice.

"It's going to happen, Edward. I've seen it."

"It doesn't have to be that way. Your visions are subjective. The future can always be changed."

"I know that. But I've seen it transpire in a dozen different ways. Eventually, one way or another—"

"Is it possible that these visions…? I don't think she understands…"

"I don't think she does, either. That's why the visions are hazy. But they _are_ her decisions, Edward. They're just locked inside her subconscious."

I heard Edward sigh, and then it was silent.

Suddenly, so much so that I startled in surprise, he rounded the corner and stared up at me.

"Bella, love, what are you doing out of bed?"

It took me a moment to find my voice. "I woke up, and you weren't there."

Whoosh, and he was with me, gathering me into his arms. "I'm sorry, my love. I would not have left, had I not felt you were sound asleep." He started guiding me up the stairs. "Do you need anything? A glass of water, perhaps?"

I shook my head, a little bewildered. The conversation I had overheard was heavy on my mind. I had no idea what they were talking about, but it seemed very serious. Important. I couldn't ask him about it, though. I didn't want him to know I had been eavesdropping.

I also didn't mention the nightmare I'd had. I just curled up with him on the bed and feigned sleep.

I had been so stupid. I wanted my love story so much, I excused all the reasons why I couldn't have it.

We had looked so ridiculous. In the nightmare. Edward looking perfectly seventeen, me looking well into my eighties.

We were already completely unbalanced. The rose and the weed. In time, the weed that I was would wither and die, while the rose would remain as perfect as the day it bloomed.

He would stay with me, hiding his disappointment as the years added haggardness to my appearance. How was that fair to him?

It wasn't.

"Would you like me to hum to you?"

He knew I was awake. I should have realized I couldn't feign sleep.

"Yes, please," I whispered. I forced the sadness from my tone. I forced myself not to cry.

I just clung to him as his sweet melodic voice wrapped around my lullaby.

Falling asleep had never been so difficult. But I must have done so at some point, because after what seemed like seconds of closing my eyes, they were opening again to the sound of Edward's gentle urging. And the sunlight.

"Good morning, my love. It's time to wake up."

I stretched a little, then looked up into his face. He seemed sad. He seemed to realize that I was sad.

"Good morning." I attempted to sound as upbeat as I possibly could, but I knew it fell short.

He pulled a slight, tense smile into his expression. "Breakfast will be ready soon."

I nodded. "'Kay. I'll be right down." I went to leave the bed, but he stopped me. We just stared at each other for an eternity of seconds.

I needed him to speak first. I didn't want to say anything until I knew for sure that I would have to. If he wasn't aware of my depression, I wouldn't burden him with it.

But he didn't say anything. He just studied me for the longest time. I couldn't bear it any longer.

"Do you think it'll be safe to go to the forest today at lunch?"

He scowled a little, but then it faded. "I will know better today. We should meet in the cafeteria. Perhaps tomorrow, if it is safe to, we can return to the forest."

I gave a nod, then forced my eyes away from his. He released my hand then, allowing me to escape.

Of course he would see the difference. I was almost giddy with happiness the day before. Now it seemed like I was marching in my own funeral procession. In a way, I guess I was. A part of me sure felt dead.

I got ready in slow motion. There was no rush to my routine. I didn't know how to face him. I couldn't tell him. I couldn't _not_ tell him.

I procrastinated for as long as possible, prolonging the inevitable. I took in a deep, shaky breath, then unlocked and opened the bathroom door.

And then I jumped a foot.

"Alice! Crap! You scared the pants off of me!"

She just laughed. Then she put her arm around me and guided me towards Edward's bedroom.

"Jasper and I want to have a word with you," she said.

Jasper? Jasper wanted to have a word with me? Except for on the phone a week ago yesterday, we had barely said six words to each other.

As soon as we entered the room, Jasper turned and faced us. He gave Alice a subtle nod. She sighed in response.

Then suddenly, I felt calm. At peace. Not exactly happy, but not at all sad.

Jasper.

"If you won't tell Edward what's wrong, will you at least tell us? Maybe we can help."

I dropped my gaze to the ground. "I had a nightmare, is all. I'm fine."

I caught Jasper shaking his head out of my peripheral vision. He didn't appear to be breathing. I was probably too close to him.

"What was it about? You know, dreams are rarely what they seem to be."

This one seemed pretty obvious. Not only that, but I knew Edward was somewhere nearby, listening. I didn't want him to know about the nightmare.

"I don't remember," I lied. "I just remember being scared when I woke up."

Jasper shook his head again, almost imperceptibly. He was ratting me out to Alice. How much could he determine by emotions alone?

"Okay. You don't have to tell me."

Yeah, she knew I had lied.

"But if you want to talk about it – or anything – you can come to me, okay?"

I nodded. Then I allowed her to lead me towards and down the stairs.

Edward looked troubled as I entered the kitchen. He smiled a little as he held my chair out for me. It looked forced.

I pulled up the brightest smile I could muster, then sat down and dug into my food like I was starving to death. I used it as a distraction from having to look at or talk to him.

I was almost done eating when he finally spoke.

"Would you like me to leave?"

It was phrased like he was asking me if I wanted him to leave the room, but I knew what he meant.

"No," I answered.

That was the problem. I _didn't_ want him to leave. Not the room. Not me. Not ever.

"Will you _please_ share your thoughts with me?"

He sounded like he was in agony again. I hated myself to the infinite degree for being the reason why.

"No." I sighed before adding, "But I'm okay, I promise. Please, don't let my mood upset you. I just have a lot on my mind."

"I could help you sort through it, if you would just share with me."

I shook my head. "This is something I have to work out on my own."

He released an anguished sigh and looked away. I immediately jumped from my seat and threw myself into his arms.

"We love each other, that's the important thing."

He clung to me. Desperately. "You were so happy yesterday. What can I do?"

"You can't fix this, Edward. It's _my_ issue. I'll work it out."

I wasn't so sure that was true. At some point, I was going to have to let him go.

School sucks. The end.

Jessica said hi to me when I first got there, but then she ran off like her tail was between her legs. Angela looked at me with such pity, I almost wanted to console _her_. Each teacher asked me at least once if I was okay.

I knew Edward could see me through the thoughts of every one of those people. It made me self-conscious of what I could say. It made me force a smile on my face as I tried to convince not only them, but Edward, that I was fine. Even when it was clear that I wasn't.

I was actually glad that I would be meeting with Edward in the cafeteria, instead of the forest. We would be limited in what we could talk about while around others. He wouldn't be able to question me.

But I was concerned that his tortured expression would call attention to him.

My concerns were unnecessary, apparently.

Edward smiled as I approached. I smiled reflexively in return.

"My love, I've missed you," he whispered. Then he gathered me into his arms.

I believed him. He held me like I had been gone for months. Maybe it seemed like longer to him because of my obvious depression.

"I missed you, too."

And I did. I just hadn't realized how much until I was back in his embrace.

Angela and Eric seemed reluctant to disturb us. Well, Angela did. Eric just plopped in a seat at the table and started unbagging his lunch.

I smiled at Angela, letting her know it was okay that they join us. Her return smile was guarded.

We mostly discussed the movie we had seen Friday night, and the editorial Angela wrote based off its plot. Since I hadn't watched the movie at all, I followed along with nods at first, but I caught on quickly enough.

Simple concept, really. Boy meets girl, but girl is engaged to someone else. Boy is miserable until he finally wins over the girl in the end. Angela's article was about unrequited love.

Angela and Eric left the table a few minutes before the bell rang, allowing me and Edward some semi-privacy.

Edward sighed deeply as he stared at me, as I stared at the remnants of my lunch.

"I'm okay," I whispered.

"You're not okay, Bella. I wish you would tell me why."

I wished he would stop asking me to. I couldn't tell him this. It would hurt him. It would sound accusatory.

'You're not going to want me when I look like a grandmother.'

Yeah, no, I couldn't tell him that.

"I'm afraid to," I admitted.

He tensed. "Why are you afraid to? You can tell me anything."

"Something rattled me, is all. Please, I really don't want to talk about it."

He sighed again. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to."

"Thanks." I pushed off of my seat. He immediately joined me.

When he offered me his hand, he seemed nervous to. Like he was worried I wouldn't take it. I grabbed for it instantly. That seemed to ease his tension a little.

Awkward silence surrounded us as he walked me to Biology. Once again, Mr. Molina greeted him enthusiastically.

"Mr. Cullen! You're becoming a regular face around here! Will you be joining us today?"

And once again, Edward surprised me.

"If you'll have me, sir, yes."

"Great! Let's see…" Mr. Molina started scanning the classroom. "Mike, Ben is in need of a lab partner again today."

Mike grumbled as he started collecting his things.

"Sorry," I muttered to him as he passed me. He just shrugged.

Ben didn't need a lab partner after all. It was a lecture day… about human anatomy of all things.

I was sure I was blushing as each organ's function was explained by the teacher. There was absolutely nothing sexual about it, so why I was blushing, I couldn't really say. It just seemed weird to be learning about something like that in front of my vampire boyfriend.

Reproductive organs were mentioned, and the class tittered in response, but since it wasn't a Sex Ed. lecture, it was glossed over rather quickly. Thank God. My blush threatened to set the room on fire.

When we were asked to read from the textbook, Edward leaned in and stared at the pages over my shoulder. I was sure he wasn't _actually_ reading it. I was sure he already knew it.

I heard him inhale slowly several times. It was distracting, but I welcomed it.

I could literally feel my depression starting to lift. Nothing was settled, nothing at all, but it didn't seem to matter as much anymore. He would leave me eventually, that was a given, but when the time came for him to, I would let him.

I only wanted for his happiness, too. Mine was just a perk in the bargain.

We parted ways outside of the women's locker room. I think he could tell I was in a better mood. His smile seemed genuine. Not forced. He kissed me briefly before hugging me tightly, then he whispered, 'I will see you at three o'clock' before walking away.

Yeah, _he_ would see _me_ before then. I kept my body turned away from Jessica again as I dressed out. She seemed uncomfortable just being near me. Humiliation had probably shifted over into guilt.

Gym was typical, English was boring… until the last few minutes of class. I allowed myself to feel excited when I saw that he was standing right outside of the room, waiting for me. As I had decided before, days that seemed like years ago, I would just soak up all I could of Edward Cullen until I was forced to relinquish him.

He marched right to my desk when the bell rang, then gathered up my backpack before offering me his hand.

We were almost to his car when he spoke.

"You seem happier now."

"I'm working on it."

"I'm very pleased to hear that. How would you like to spend the evening, my love?" he asked as he opened my door.

"I'm open to suggestions." I moved to get in, but he wrapped his arms around me, stopping me.

Then he hummed. "I want to make you happy again."

"You make me happy, Edward. I was just allowing negative thoughts to dwell."

"Will you share them with me now? Or do you need more time?"

I sighed. Telling him was just _not_ a good idea. "I don't want to upset you."

"Not knowing your mind upsets me, Bella. If you value my sanity, will you please just tell me?"

I relented. Of course I did. I loved him way too much. "Can we take a trip when we get home? Out of earshot, where we can have some privacy?"

"Yes."

I barely remembered getting into the car. Or the ride home. As soon as he parked, he helped me out, slung me up onto his back, and then we were flying through the forest. I barely remembered that, too. I think I finally woke up from my daze when I saw that we were back in that little meadow he had taken me to before, on the Saturday I pieced together his secret.

"This is perfect," I whispered, then I walked with him, hand in hand, to the very spot we had occupied nine days ago.

We both sat, then he stared at me while I stared at the grass.

"Please, Bella?"

I took in a breath as I gathered my thoughts. "I had a nightmare last night. This morning, I guess. That's why I woke up. I don't want to tell you what it was about, so, please, don't ask me to, but, it triggered some… negativity."

He said nothing. He just watched me. So I continued.

"I'm scared, Edward." I saw him tense, so I quickly explained. "I think you'll leave me… sooner than I would like you to."

"I will never leave you, Bella."

I sighed. "You say that now. But, realistically…"

"Realistically," he continued when I trailed off, "I will never leave you."

"You're not going to want me when I look like a grandmother."

There. I'd said it. No going back.

But he didn't respond. He just continued to stare back at me, like he was expecting me to say something else. It confused me.

"What?" I asked.

"Was that all?"

Was that all? Wasn't that enough? "Well, yeah."

He sighed. Heavily. "Bella, I will always love you. Always. I will love you until the day you die. And then I will merely exist on the memory of you for the rest of my eternity."

Oh, great. That didn't make me feel guilty at all. It also made me cry.

I crawled over to him and climbed into his lap.

"Shhh, love, don't cry. The memory of you will sustain me."

_Romeo and Juliet_ was a happy story with fluffy bunnies in comparison to mine and Edward's love story.

We said nothing else as we held each other. We did nothing but hold each other until the sun started to set.

The entire family could tell something was wrong. They shared odd looks when they didn't think I was paying attention. Edward's eyes shifted about the room constantly, ignoring the television that was on for no one's benefit. I only watched it blankly.

Edward stared at me while I did my homework. He had a book in his hands, but I could see his eyes peering above the edge of it.

I took my time showering. It was hard to be in his presence. I wanted to get back to happy, I just wasn't sure how to. When around Jasper, it was bearable. His vampire gift was a welcomed one. But when he left with Alice, the despair crept back in.

I threw my crap by the bed, then crawled in beside Edward. He had been waiting for me. When he gathered me into his arms, a little sob escaped me. He held me tighter in response.

"Bella, please, is there anything I can do?"

More than anything, I wanted him to be able to fix it. But there wasn't a magical solution. I knew there wasn't. "I don't want to give you up, but is it right for me to hold onto you? It doesn't seem fair to you."

He took exactly twelve seconds to respond.

"It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all."

He really was a sick, masochistic lion. And I was the stupidest lamb on the planet.

But he was _my_ lion, and I was _his_ lamb.

We were the epitome of a tragic love story. The embodiment of Mother Nature's cruel sense of humor.

But we were also in love. Not just in love, but soul mates, if one chose to believe in such a thing.

There was no way I could give him up. How could I?

I had two choices.

First, dwell on all the negative aspects of our relationship and live in a state of depression for decades.

Or, second, find the happiness wherever I could. Wherever _we_ could.

I shifted my position and looked up into Edward's worried, sad face. I smiled. It wasn't beaming, but it wasn't forced, either.

"I love you," I whispered.

His eyes lightened a little. He smiled in return. "I love you," he whispered back.

That was enough for now.

We would work it out.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Notes:**

I am completely amazed by all the wonderful reviews and compliments. Thank you, sincerely, for all your kind words.

GoldenBeliever: Thank you. What a humbling thing to have read.

Inu-Oni Shi: Thank you from coming out of lurkdom! I appreciate your review!

AJ04-Jtrs98: Pretty hot, huh? LOL! Thanks! It's hard to get a balance of 'hot' and not too graphic in a PG-13 fic! Glad I succeeded with that.

I Smile When It Rains: 1) Yes, there will be 'any conflict other than'. 2) Yes, Jake 're-enters'. 3) I word things carefully so that if someone is not aware of such things, one wouldn't know what is going on. 4) I have 'creative license to experiment with' the characters, but chose not to alter them too drastically. I also have 'creative license' to _not_ (alter them). 5) I have been writing and enjoying fanfiction for over a decade. I'm just new to the 'Twilight' fandom.

Okay, who wants to take a guess at the lines that brought me to tears as I wrote them? I think they're obvious, but maybe they're not. I will post the answer in the next chapter's ANs.

Fave line in this chapter: I would just soak up all I could of Edward Cullen until I was forced to relinquish him. – I liked this line so much, I used it in the banner my beta made for me. You can see this banner on my personal webpage, and on the 'Twilight' fanfiction site Twilighted.

I have two ideas for future fics, and my beta thinks they're both good and workable. If I can come up with concise concept summaries, I'll tack them onto the end of one of the chapters here and see what y'all think.

Still not smoking. Today, I step down to the seven mg patches. At the end of two weeks from now, I'm hoping to be able to function without patches. I'm thinking of getting myself one of those squeezy stress balls.

Please continue to review! They make me happy!

MTLBYAKY


	30. Chapter 30

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Thirty

By: Jana~

**XXX**

I was in a much better mood when I woke up Tuesday morning. Each day with Edward was like a precious gift. I wasn't about to waste a single one of them grieving for the future.

"Good morning, my love."

I smiled into his chest. "Yes, it is." I felt his arms tighten around me a little.

"I have been thinking about how I would like us to spend your last evening here. But first, I wish to ask you a question."

I nodded, and then I was being encouraged to sit up. I did so, a bit reluctantly.

There was a slight tug at his lips, and then he just stared back at me for the longest time. He seemed to be gathering his courage. It made my curiosity pique.

"Will you allow me to take you to your prom?" His eyes glimmered expectantly.

"I can't dance." I responded automatically. Defensively. Without thinking. Stupid reflexivity.

He seemed to realize that. His amusement flashed briefly. "I will teach you."

I could imagine him teaching me. Holding me tight to him, us swaying to soft music. Me stepping on his feet. I pushed that last thought aside.

"You're assuming I can be taught." I smirked. "But if you're game, I'm game."

His smile was beaming. When he pulled me into his arms, I climbed into his lap, straddling him.

I could picture it. Him in a suit, looking every bit the proper gentleman that he was. Oh, I'd be there, too, in that Colonial blue dress Alice would let me borrow, my hair and makeup done by her to a nauseating degree, but where my focus remained, was on Edward.

He would be gorgeous, of course, and I would be on his arm. In his eyes as he stared lovingly at me. In his embrace as we danced, as I tried not to kill him or myself. It was a _good_ picture.

And then a new image, a new thought, popped into my head.

I could _feel_ him again. My body pressed against his had affected him. Carefully, experimentally, I rolled my hips a little. I felt the rumble deep from within him, but no sound actually came out.

Optimistic that maybe, just maybe, there would be a chance to take things a little further, I started nuzzling his neck, but that just seemed to serve as a wakeup call.

He took me by the waist, gently, then rolled us both so that we were side-by-side.

I sighed in frustration. So much for that.

But my disillusionment barely had a chance to take hold. His hands were suddenly roaming. Caressing. Fondling. I liquefied. Ignited.

And then he was kissing me, in that perfect, loving, _luring_ way that literally took my breath away.

Breathing was overrated.

I didn't even try to be quiet at the end. The Cullens, were they in the house, would have already known by then what we were doing anyway.

I moaned. My back arched. And then I collapsed.

He gathered my limp body into his arms, and then he settled his cheek against mine. His lips were right at my ear.

"You will be late for school."

"I'm not going to school," I said. "And don't even try to tell me I am. I can make my own decisions. This is my last _full_ day here. I want to spend it with you."

He chuckled a little. "I'm too selfish to argue with you. I want to spend the day with you as well."

"Then it's settled," I whispered. Then I sighed contentedly.

We were both quiet for a million years.

"Do I please you, Bella?"

I laughed. "Oh, boy, do you ever _please_ me." He laughed then, too.

"You're happy again today."

I nodded. "I'm sorry for my poor mood yesterday. I lost a whole day with you because of it. That's another reason why I want to stay home today. To make up for that lost time."

"How would you like to spend it?"

I pulled back a little and smiled up at him. "Learning to dance?"

Okay, Fred Astaire had nothing on Edward. He even made _me_ look good, not that I was actually dancing. I was standing on his feet while _he_ danced.

I fell off a bunch of times – don't ask me how; gravity has never been my friend – but when I did we just laughed about it. It felt good to laugh.

Edward seemed to revel in it. Every time I so much as smiled, he grinned widely. Like my happiness really was of the utmost importance to him.

The close proximity to him was intoxicating. His hand was on the small of my back, pressing me into his body. My cheek was against his chest. His chin rested atop my head.

When I would tire, we sat on the chaise at the back of the piano room, him behind me, me leaning against him, his arms wrapped protectively around me.

At lunch time, we stopped so I could eat. Esme smiled so sweetly at me as she set the plate containing my sandwich in front of me. Then she touched my shoulder before leaving the room.

Yeah, she definitely approved.

The meal was delicious, as always, but I mostly just ate it to appease Edward. And my stomach. I wanted to get back to learning.

Edward was an excellent teacher. Unfortunately, my feet refused to be taught. He had the patience of a saint, though, I had to give it to him. He never gave up on me, no matter how many times I zigged when I should have zagged. No matter how many times I stomped on his toes, or almost fell on my face.

He rescued me from my imminent face-plants every time.

"I'm never going to get this." I wasn't exactly frustrated. I figured as much.

"Shhh, love…" He held me tighter. We were still swaying, but our feet were firmly planted. It was like a hug set in motion. "We have time still."

I was pretty sure I wouldn't improve after _years_, but I nodded anyway.

"May I ask you a question?"

I nodded again.

"You were so sad yesterday. What happened to change that?"

I worded my response carefully. "I just decided to be happy. I _want_ to be happy."

"Then we share that in common. I want you to be happy as well."

I smirked. "I know. Your love for me amazes me sometimes. _All_ the time," I corrected.

"Is it too much? I don't wish to overwhelm you."

"No. It's not too much. It's perfect. _You're_ perfect. That's the amazing part."

"I'm not perfect, Bella. I wish I was. You deserve perfection."

He was wrong. I didn't deserve perfection. Not by a long shot. But the fact that he thought I did… The fact that he thought _I_ deserved _him_…

My heart rate soared. My breaths shuddered. I stretched up and buried my face in his neck.

We didn't even make it to the bedroom. We barely made it to the chaise in the corner.

It was frantic to start with, but then it just slowed into this sweet, sort of… exploration. I finally braved forward into uncharted territory… just a little. Briefly. He liked that. I did, too.

He eventually nuzzled my neck, but he kept the affection of that very gentle. Tentative. Like he was testing to see where his line of control was. After planting a few soft kisses, he moved away.

Progress. At least he was trying.

I reciprocated in the exact same way. What we were doing didn't seem to be about some magical final end. We were _acquainting_ ourselves with each other.

He allowed me to slip my hand up under the hem of his shirt, and it was then that I realized… I _had_ chosen the right adjective before. His skin was unyielding. But yet it was also yielding.

I likened it to a mixture of cornstarch. It seems like a thick liquid, but when you smack it with a spoon, it has the consistency of something hard. But then if you just gently press the spoon against it, it sinks right in.

That wasn't the right analogy, but it was the only one I could come up with. His skin, like cornstarch, was a complete contradiction.

I marveled at the feel of him beneath my fingertips. I soaked up every sigh and moan he made. Reveled in every deep inhale he took.

I think we carried on like that for hours. Time didn't make sense again. The CD of his music we had been dancing to started over at least twice. No one ever disturbed us.

I don't remember the exact moment we stopped. We did at some point, though, because next I was aware, we were just holding each other, our hands still, our bodies at peace.

"I'm never going to school again," I whispered. I grinned when he laughed.

"Your education is necessary, my love."

I didn't care. Not right then, anyway. Maybe I would later in life, when no employer would hire me due to my lack of a diploma. But right then…

"Yeah, so you keep saying."

"Would you be opposed to me enrolling in your school?"

My smile dropped so abruptly, it almost cracked my face. I pushed up on my elbow so that I could look at him. "Are you serious?"

Sure, Angela had joked with him about that, and he stared back at me intently after he had responded to her, but…

"Yes, if you're not opposed to it. If you would rather have that time for yourself, for space between us, I will understand—"

I didn't even let him finish. I just attacked his lips with mine. "Yes," I muttered against him. And then I repeated myself three more times, punctuating each of them with a kiss. I could feel him smiling.

"I will ask Carlisle and Esme to make the arrangements tomorrow. I will most probably be able to start by next week."

I snuggled up to him again, my head back to resting on his chest. "We'll probably have at least a few classes together…"

"Love, we will have every class together."

I grinned a little. "You guys have that kind of pull?"

He laughed at that. "We can be very persuasive, trust me."

I did. Explicitly. I sighed contentedly.

"Does this make you happy, my love?"

To the point of bursting. "Yes," I whispered.

The idea of it thrilled me. Every moment with Edward was precious. The more time I was able to spend with him each day, the better. Gym might be embarrassing – I doubted any girlfriend would want their boyfriend to see them face-plant on a daily basis – but that was a small price to pay.

We could be lab partners in Biology. We could do homework assignments together. We could walk hand in hand to each class, and have lunch and drive to and from school together.

It seemed I was back to happy. I was glad for it. Depression sucked. I had wasted an entire day with Edward because of it. I couldn't get that day back, but I vowed to myself as we snuggled with each other, on the chaise, in the piano room, until dinner time, that I would never let that happen again.

My mind was made up. I knew what I wanted. And what I wanted was to be happy. With Edward. For better or for worse. Until death – _my_ death – do us part.

And then I remembered Alice's teasing comments from the other night. _Had_ she seen something? Had a vision? Was that where Edward and I were headed? Marriage?

I wasn't exactly opposed to the idea – a thought that surprised me, actually – but getting married to Edward presented a unique set of complications. If I wanted to have any family or friends in attendance, we wouldn't be able to wait too many more years before doing it. If we waited too long, his youthful appearance would call too much attention. But if we got married too soon, people would probably assume that I had gotten knocked up. In time, they would see that I hadn't, but still, that would call too much attention as well.

I needed to stop thinking about it. Depression was lurking nearby, threatening to creep in again. I pushed all thoughts away save one. Being in Edward's arms. That made me happy. And since being happy was the goal…

I soaked up every detail. Every nuance. The way he held me with delicate adoration. The way his fingers gently pressed into my arm. The way his thumb brushed across my skin. The way his legs entwined with mine.

Even though I was hungry – the smells wafting through the house indicated that dinner was almost ready – I didn't want to eat. I was too comfortable. Too at peace. Too unwilling to give up my connection to Edward.

Esme insisted. Apparently. She never entered the room. She had only thought it, and Edward passed her motherly concerns along to me.

But dinnertime was actually fun. Since it was to be my last evening meal at their house – my parents' plane was due to come in while I was at school tomorrow – we, or rather I, ate in the dining room again, like I had my first two nights there. All the Cullens joined me, with the exception of Rosalie.

And then they all regaled me with stories.

Jasper shared of when he and Alice first met. She'd had a vision, and was waiting for him to show up. She teased him when he finally did, joking that he'd kept her waiting. They really did seem to be in love. His eyes expressed absolute adoration for Alice, like Edward's eyes did for me.

Carlisle – he insisted I call him that instead of Dr. Cullen – shared of when Edward had graduated high school. The first time. How proud he was. His standing ovation and enthusiastic applause when Edward went up to accept his diploma was, apparently, still joked about. He laughed it off good naturedly, though. He was clearly a very dedicated father to his adopted children.

Esme's story was the most touching. And the most depressing, though the mood in the room never followed. That was probably Jasper's doing.

When she was still human, she had given birth to a son, but he died a few days later from a lung infection. Her love for that son she never really got the chance to know transferred over to Edward after she was changed into a vampire. She almost smothered him with her motherly affections.

Initially, Edward was accepting of that because he felt sympathy for her, but he soon found that he enjoyed having that type of parent/child bond again. A bond that was clearly still intact to this day.

Alice's story was the most humorous.

"I'd had a vision, and needed to talk to Carlisle about it. He was on shift at the hospital, so Edward agreed to go down there with me. Now, keep in mind, this was nineteen-sixty-five. The hippie era."

She grinned a little. "We were asked to sit in the waiting room, which was full of patients waiting to be seen. We found our seats, me next to a woman who obviously had a fever, Edward next to an empty chair. He was quite pleased that he didn't have to sit right up next to someone like I did. Well, he was punished for his smugness, let me tell you!"

Edward rolled his eyes.

"Two minutes later, and here comes this guy that is just stoned every which way one can be. He reeked of it! But apparently, he didn't feel he was quite stoned enough. He whipped out a joint and lit it, right there in front of everyone! That made Edward very uncomfortable. Stoners can be unpredictable. If they get the munchies, they'll eat the buttons right off their own shirts!"

Everyone laughed… except Edward. He seemed a little annoyed.

"Unpredictable stoner guy was a very generous man. He wanted to share his high with others. After taking a couple hits, he tried to pass it to Edward! Edward was ignoring him, but the guy just kept pushing the thing closer and closer, almost right up in his face! Like Edward just didn't see it or something!"

Apparently, the punch-line was coming. Her eyes grew brighter and her smile widened.

"I could see each decision as he considered how to handle the situation. Politely refuse. Impolitely refuse. Get up and leave. Grab the thing from the guy and stomp it out. Finally, he decides on intimidation. He turns to the guy, and with all his vampire abilities, growls at him. Normal people would have fled. Run away. Nope. Not this guy. He just looks at Edward for a moment, then extends the thing even closer to his face. 'Dude, take it,'" she said in an altered, deeper voice. "'You need it more than me.'"

Emmett laughed. "You can't even scare off a stoner! And they're usually paranoid!"

"He thought I was irritated over the wait to be seen," Edward stated calmly.

Everyone burst into laughter. Again, except for Edward. He did smirk a little, though.

"Okay, okay, I got one!" Emmett announced excitedly. "Eddie and I were in Alaska chasing polar bears…"

Edward growled.

"What?" Emmett asked. "Everyone else gets to embarrass you but I don't?"

Edward's eyes were very firm. At first, I thought this was because Emmett was about to share a hunting story. The one taboo subject Edward refused to discuss with me.

"Oh, what? She's not going to care! Anyway…" Emmett turned away from Edward and faced me again. "There we are, ready to make our move, when out of nowhere, Edward stops mid hunt. The shocked look on his face is enough to make me stop, too. So I ask him what's wrong, but before he can even answer, Tanya appears out of nowhere and tackles Edward to the ground. She's always had a thing for him. Any chance to roll around with him…"

He laughed hard at that. Edward's eyes grew darker.

"The bears take off, so we give chase. I swear, it was hard to tell if Edward was running _away_ from Tanya or _after_ the hunt! I found out! He's faster than most… he zooms right by the bears and just keeps on going! I didn't see him again for three days!"

Emmett kept on laughing, seemingly oblivious to Edward's irritation. Everyone else seemed tense.

A joke was in order. "Maybe he needed a break from his annoying sibling."

I smirked at Emmett when he stopped laughing, his expression showing both surprise and confusion. I think he was trying to decide if I was insulting him. Edward softened a little. Everyone else laughed.

"Okay," I said as I pushed off my seat, "I need to… have myself a human moment. I'll be right back."

Forever the gentleman, Edward stood as I left the room.

They probably had a downstairs bathroom, but I went to the one upstairs. Familiarity.

As I… tended to business… I stared at the nothing in front of me.

I could picture her. Tanya. Even though I had no idea what she looked like. She was gorgeous, as I was sure all vampires were, if the Cullens were any indication.

And she wanted Edward. _My_ Edward. He clearly didn't want her, but… What if some other beautiful vampire showed up, and Edward came to realize just how ordinary I really was?

The thought of it sent a shudder down my spine.

I finished up, washed my hands, then headed for the door.

Crap! How many Cullens were going to scare me like that?

"Rosalie!" I gasped. "You scared me!"

She just stood there, in front of the door, looking…

Not angry. I thought maybe sad, but that didn't seem to be it, either.

"We all have choices to make, Bella," she said.

My name wasn't even out of her mouth when I caught movement out of my peripheral vision. Every other Cullen in the house was standing in the entrance to the hall just off the stairs. My eyes stayed on Rosalie.

"I don't hate you," she continued. "I hate the choices you're about to make."

"Rosalie…"

Her eyes flashed over towards Carlisle when he said her name. Then I felt Edward's hands on my shoulders.

I followed numbly, confused, as he guided me towards his room.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Note:**

Sorry if there are more mistakes than usual in this chapter. I'm still beta-ing for myself, and I'm currently struggling with a huge bout of depression. But I wanted to keep my promise to update daily, so here it is, in all its probable suckiness.

Golden Perception: MTLBYAKY = May The Lord Bless You And Keep You

For those following my progress… still not smoking. Now I'm on the seven mg patches. They're small. Not much bigger than an inoculation band-aid.

Well, guys, we're nearing the end now. Five more chapters to go after this one. I want to thank you all, for giving this story a chance and for all the wonderful reviews and support.

MTLBYAKY


	31. Chapter 31

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Thirty-One

By: Jana~

**XXX**

What did Rosalie mean by that? My mind spun it around and around, trying to make sense of it.

My first thought was that she was referring to my decision to stay with Charlie instead of Renee, when they eventually announced that they were getting a divorce. But why should she care?

My second thought seemed more likely. She was unhappy about my decision to be in a relationship with Edward. In the long run, it would only cause him pain. It would be only natural that she would want to spare her brother from that.

"What are you thinking?"

I snapped out of my contemplative haze and looked up at Edward from where I sat on the edge of his bed. He was still standing a few feet away.

"She doesn't approve." There was no point in whispering. I did it anyway. "Of us," I added.

Sighing, he took a seat beside me. "Whether she does or not is irrelevant. You are my mate now, until you order me away."

Rosalie's cryptic words drifted to the back of my mind.

Mate? Not _girlfriend_, but _mate_. I knew absolutely that he didn't mean that in a 'best buddies' kind of way.

In the animal kingdom, many species mate for life. Did vampires have a similar instinct?

After all the ways that it had been both outright said and implied, I still couldn't wrap my brain around it. After knowing Edward Cullen for only thirteen days, after knowing his secret for only ten days, we were committed to each other _for life_.

"I will never order you away. You're my mate now, too."

There was something oddly satisfying about using the rawer term when describing our relationship. It felt natural. It felt… right.

He slid his arms around me, and I fell eagerly into his embrace.

I dropped the subject of Rosalie. I avoided the subject of Tanya. It was our last night together at his house. I just wanted to enjoy it. I wanted it to be special.

And it was. We decided to take a stroll through the forest. Not a run but a stroll. There was no rush. No hurry. We just walked hand in hand, enjoying each other's company, chatting casually about nothing of any great importance.

We discussed books, and music – we learned that Debussy was a mutual favorite – and science of all things. I'd always felt a little drawn to the subject. Apparently, that was because I had an aptitude for it. According to Edward.

I only kind of fell once – he stopped me from actually hitting the ground seconds before I did – but I stumbled a lot. It was too dark to avoid obstacles like twigs, and branches, and soggy leaves, not that I had any better luck with that during daylight hours.

We stopped to rest shortly after we started heading back to his house. Since the ground was wet, Edward pulled me up onto his back and leapt into a tree. There wasn't much of a view, because we didn't go up it very far, but that didn't matter. I wasn't interested in the scenery.

His one hand held me protectively while the other adored me. He brushed his fingers across my cheek, raked them into my hair… and then he was kissing me. It wasn't at all urgent.

Our foreheads were touching, but not straight on. It was more like off to the side. Every few seconds or so, he would dip in a little and touch his lips to mine. Then he would tilt back and wait before repeating. There was something poignant about it. Significant. Profound. I was too caught up in it to decipher any sort of hidden meaning, though.

"Edward…"

I whimpered his name, but I only just realized that because of his response.

"Yes, my love?"

I didn't have an answer. And I was pretty sure any kind of sentence I tried to create would be anything but coherent. So I said the only thing I could think of.

"_More_."

Immediately, so much so that I gasped at the suddenness, his lips were on my neck. My adrenalin spiked instantly.

He started slow. Soft, brushing kisses. A little flick of his tongue. He was testing. Not just himself, but me.

I could feel the blackness stalking my consciousness, but I fought it back. I had to. I just somehow knew, if I passed out this time, he would never show me that kind of affection again.

And I wanted him to. For reasons I still couldn't understand.

The kisses deepened. I pushed my hand into his hair, encouraging him. Then I felt his lips latch on. The most delicious pressure followed. I moaned. Loudly. It seemed to echo around us.

I grew limp, but I was still conscious. He held me tighter.

I could feel the blood pooling just beneath my skin. It throbbed pleasantly.

When the suction eased, I could feel his tongue again, lapping at the very spot of the exquisite aching.

He was soothing it. He was tasting me. He nuzzled up behind my ear, into my hair, inhaling deeply.

And then ninety-eight years passed.

"Acclimation," I whispered. I couldn't even bring myself to smile when he laughed. I was too high on Drug Edward. I felt as if I was in a dreamlike state. The kind one struggles to but can't wake up from.

"It's time to go home now, my love."

"Hmmm…"

There was no memory of the trip home. None at all. Next I was aware, I was in Edward's bed, in his arms, my head resting on his chest. I couldn't open my eyes. The lids were too heavy. The line between dream and reality was blurred.

"Did… fall asleep?" I asked, confused.

"No."

"Pass out?"

"No."

I wanted to understand. "What happened?"

"You were… blissful."

Blissful. Lost to the effects of Drug Edward. I was still feeling lost. Every word was a struggle to say. Every thought difficult to grasp.

"How long?"

"Twenty-three minutes."

I wanted to move. I wanted to look up at him. I told my body to, but it refused to obey. His arms tightened around me.

"Shhh, sleep now. You have school in the morning."

I didn't want to go to sleep. Something niggled at the back of my mind, telling me not to. But I couldn't determine what that something was.

There was no worry or panic accompanying the sense that I was forgetting something. I felt… euphoric. That was probably why I gave in so easily.

Moments before sleep enveloped me, I heard one, single, whispered word.

"Compromise."

It seemed important somehow. I wanted to ask him about it – ask what he meant – but I couldn't find my way out of the haze. I think I hummed questioningly, but Edward didn't answer. Or maybe I didn't make the sound after all.

And then I could see light bleeding through my closed eyelids. I dismissed it. Then I felt cool lips lingering on my forehead. _That_ I couldn't ignore.

"Dearest Bella, it's time to wake up."

Huh? How could it be? I had just fallen asleep seconds ago.

I forced my eyes open. The light was the morning sun.

Startled, I shot up out of Edward's arms. Edward shot up with me.

"Shhh, love, you're safe. You slept deeply. You're disoriented."

His thumb brushed across my cheek as his hand cupped me. As I stared back at him in total confusion.

Drug Edward had morning after side effects, apparently.

"What happened last night?"

He scowled a little. "You don't remember?"

I blinked a few times, trying to. "You… My neck…"

His eyes shifted as he sighed. "I'm sorry for injuring you."

Reflexively, my hand flew up to where his gaze had landed. My neck. My fingers searched for any sign of a wound.

Nothing.

"I was trying to please you. I was trying to find a compromise."

"Compromise?" He had said that before, hadn't he? Seconds or hours ago, I wasn't quite sure.

He winced. "You were offering yourself to me, Bella."

Well, yeah, because I had felt an irresistible craving for him to show me affection in that way.

"Is that a bad thing?"

His return expression told me it was. It was a bad thing for some reason. I just didn't know why. _He_ had offered himself to _me_ before. Why was it not okay that I do so, too?

"Why?" I asked. "Why was that a bad thing?"

He didn't answer. Not directly, anyway. He reached out and drew a circle with just the tip of his finger on my neck, then whispered, "Look in the mirror, then tell me what I did wasn't wrong."

I had the vague understanding that he had left the bed and was leaving the room, but I was too bewildered to fully comprehend it. By the time I had enough wits about me to stop him, it was too late. He was gone.

I grabbed my crap and ran for the bathroom.

Okay, was that what all the fuss was about? He had given me a hickey. So what? I sure wasn't the first woman to get one, nor would I be the last. Did he really think that constituted as an injury?

I rushed through my morning routine, hell bent on setting him straight. But as I approached the kitchen, I heard the tail end of a conversation he was having with Alice. It made me stop in my tracks.

My new habit of eavesdropping… Yeah, not a good trait.

"It might save _you_ a lot of heartache, and _her_ a lot of confusion."

"I would rather wait for her to figure it out on her own."

Silence. They knew I was there.

I quickly stepped around the corner and into the room.

"Morning, Bella!"

"Morning, Alice." I tried to sound as chipper as she did, but really, I doubted anyone could.

"I'm just going to leave you guys to talk." Alice's eyes flickered to the red mark on my neck as she passed me on her way out.

It reminded me of what I had wanted to say to him. The conversation I overheard shifted to the back of my mind.

"Edward…" I sighed as I took my usual seat. I left my breakfast untouched for the moment. "Hickeys are no big deal. They're not injuries, they're… love marks."

We just stared at each other. He took forever to respond.

"You're too forgiving."

I scoffed. "There's nothing to forgive! I _liked_ it! I don't get why I felt like I was on drugs afterwards…" I was careful not to name that drug. "But even that was _good_."

His intensity eased a little. "I only wanted to please you."

He sounded remorseful. Why was this so hard for him to understand? Or was it me who was missing something?

"You _did_. Look at me, all happy and pleased!" I grinned at him for emphasis. Hip lips twitched in amusement. "This is my last morning here, Edward. I want it to be a good one."

He seemed to relent, though a bit reluctantly. He sighed, looked to the floor, but then when he raised his eyes again, he smiled at me. "Carlisle and Esme will be visiting the school's registrar's office today."

I grinned again, genuinely. We were back on track.

As Edward and I walked hand in hand towards my first period class, Jessica caught up with us. Edward didn't tense. I took his cue.

"Hey, guys! Um, Angela was saying that you're all going to Port Angeles this weekend? Dress shopping?"

Way to fish for an invite, Jess. I made it easy on her. It just felt like the right thing to do.

"Yeah. You could join us, if you're free."

Her face lit up with surprise. "Really? Great! I do need to shop, actually." She paused a second before announcing, "Mike asked me to the prom!"

"That's great, Jess." I meant that sincerely. It _was_ great. Great for her. Great for me. Great for Edward.

How uncomfortable must it have been for him to hear her obsessive thoughts about him? Probably as uncomfortable as it would be if he could hear mine. Which was why it was a good thing he couldn't read my mind.

"I know, right? Maybe the guys can catch a movie or something while we try on!"

Yay for Edward. That wouldn't be annoying for him at all. "Yeah, maybe," I muttered. I had to force myself not to look at him, to gauge his reaction.

"Well, I better get going. Don't want to be late! See'ya!"

She nearly skipped off.

"She seems… happy," I mentioned as we started walking again. I hoped she was. I never disliked Jessica, I was just fed up with her inconsiderate prying.

"She is. You inviting her helped. She was nervous to ask."

I nodded, then asked carefully, "Are her thoughts… about you… any better?"

"Yes. She wonders a little, but her focus now is on Mike."

Good. Edward was off limits. Jessica and I could coexist again.

Mr. Jefferson rolled his eyes when Edward walked me to my seat. I couldn't wait to see his reaction when Edward became a student in his class. _If_ he became one.

He'd said that he would have every class with me, but still, realistically, there was a chance that wouldn't actually happen.

Edward kissed me before saying goodbye. My heart raced as his lips touched mine, as his hand raked into my hair.

I could hear the tittering of the other students, I could sense Angela looking away respectfully, but I ignored all of it. Everything. Nothing mattered more than these moments.

When he pulled back, his eyes locked with mine.

"I will see you later, my love. Breathe."

Even though he whispered that, I was sure everyone in the room had heard him. I didn't care.

I nodded, then watched him until he disappeared out the door.

Mr. Jefferson cleared his throat in a way that indicated he was annoyed. Angela grinned widely; she was clearly happy for me. All the other kids stared at me until the start of class.

I was on my way to Spanish, watching my feet as I walked so that I wouldn't face-plant, thinking of Edward, willing time to move faster so that I could see him again. Only one period left before lunch.

"Excuse me, miss. I'm new here, and I was wondering if you could assist me in locating my classroom."

I spun around at the sound of his voice, my smile growing wider as he approached me.

"Already? I thought you wouldn't be starting until next week!"

I threw myself into his arms. My existence clicked into place.

"They offered me a choice. I couldn't wait to start spending every moment I can with you."

I hopped back and snatched the schedule he held from out of his hand. I had to see. Had to know how many classes we were going to have together.

Every one of them.

"You pulled it off?"

He grinned. "Easily."

The kids walking by us started running. We were going to be late.

And we were, but Mrs. Goff didn't seem to care. She giddily spent the first several minutes of class conversing with Edward in fluent Spanish.

I heard my name towards the end of their chat, but I only understood a part of what was said. I found out later that he had asked if he could sit next to me.

Her answer was yes. Of course I understood that much. It wasn't that I was a bad student in Spanish, it was just that they were talking _so fast_. And they were using words and phrases I had yet to learn.

Having Edward sitting next to me was going to improve my grade, I was sure of it.

Lunch was interesting, but in a good way. Well, for the most part.

"I heard you had enrolled!" Angela said as she and Eric joined us. "Small school," she added. "Word gets around fast."

"Piano dude! Wassup?"

"Okay, that was _so_ a million years ago! Get with the times!" Jessica teased. She and Mike hovered near our table, like they were waiting for an invitation.

"The classics never die," Eric retorted. Then he pushed a chair towards Mike.

Mike sat, but Jessica remained standing. I decided to give her another break. We would see how it went.

I gestured for her to join us. She grinned as she did.

"My mom said I could have the charge card this weekend! She gave me a limit, but…"

As Jessica chattered about how much money she was planning to spend during our weekend shopping trip, Edward reached into his brand new backpack and pulled out a lunch for me. He smiled as he pushed it across the table in my direction.

"You brought Bella's lunch but forgot your own?" Eric asked.

Crap! The smile dropped from my face. Edward's never faltered.

"I'm on a special diet," he said. Everyone at our table just stared back at him. "Medical necessity," he added.

It would have been the perfect opportunity for Jessica to start in. But, surprisingly, she didn't.

She looked a little uncomfortable as she averted her eyes, but then she seemed to recover as she turned her attention on Mike.

"I don't care how crazy a driver you think I am! _I'm_ driving on Saturday!"

Mike groaned, but he was smirking when he did.

I tuned their playful banter out. Edward had touched my hand. When I looked up at him, he glanced pointedly at the bagged lunch with my name neatly penned on it. Then he returned his eyes to mine.

I grinned as I shook my head. His concern for me would never grow old, I was sure of it. As I was sure he would never stop being concerned. I was his frail, fragile little human. Breakable. In his care.

I liked being in his care.

"Bella, that's a beautiful bracelet!"

My eyes darted to the crystal heart around my wrist before landing on Angela. I could feel the blush coloring my cheeks.

"Um, thanks. It was a gift."

Eric laughed. Knowing him well enough, I knew why. My eyes narrowed on him in warning. He didn't take it.

"Dude's got it bad," he teased, amused with himself.

Edward didn't seem to care at all. He almost seemed pleased. His smile grew just a little.

"So, what's your schedule like, Edward?" Angela asked. It seemed she was trying to change the subject because she sensed I was uncomfortable. "Maybe we have some classes together," she added.

"The first two of the day, yes," Edward replied. "My schedule is the same as Bella's."

"Exactly?" She sounded surprised. "Wow, what are the chances?"

Edward just smiled back at her.

"I guess it's where they had room," I muttered. I avoided Angela's eyes as I took renewed interest in my lunch.

"I'm sorry, Mike…"

My ears perked when I heard Edward address him, but my focus remained on my sandwich.

"I believe Mr. Molina will be asking you to relocate permanently."

Mike shrugged. "No biggie." A teasing smirk then inched onto his face. "Bella was holding me back anyway."

I glared at him. Jokingly. "Oh, ha, ha. Who was it that almost passed out on dissection day? Who earned us the 'A' then, hmm?"

Eric laughed and threw a balled up piece of paper at Mike, which got them both off and running, chasing each other through the cafeteria and out the door.

"Geez," Jessica said, rolling her eyes, "it's like first grade all over again."

I had to agree with her on that one. Teenage boys could be so childish. Except for Edward. Except he wasn't exactly a teenage boy.

Sure, he looked it, but he was decades older than that. How weird did it seem to others that he didn't behave in a manner befitting his supposed age?

Or maybe it didn't seem weird at all. Maybe it seemed refreshing.

"At least some guys know how to act like a grownup," Jessica said. She glanced at Edward, her smile a little awkward, then she averted her eyes again and addressed Angela. "Maybe we could go to that restaurant around the corner from the shop?"

Angela agreed. I honestly didn't care, so I shrugged in acceptance.

Mike and Eric made an appearance again right before the bell, laughing and shoving each other. They settled down a little as they retook their seats.

As we started walking to Biology, Edward removed his hand from mine and draped his arm over and around my shoulder. It was casual but affectionate. We looked like any other teenage couple.

So then why were people staring?

"Everyone's looking at us," I whispered.

He glanced around. "Not that guy." He hummed three seconds later. "He just looked. Does it bother you?" he asked.

"No. Just wondering why. Maybe it's just because you're the new kid," I reasoned.

Made sense. Forks didn't get too many newcomers.

"I don't wish to make you uncomfortable."

I could feel his arm twitch, like he was about ready to remove it from around me. I quickly wrapped my arm around his waist.

"I don't care if people stare, Edward."

Well, I did, but I cared about him more.

"Are you happy, my love?"

He asked me that a lot. It was then that I realized, I never asked him if he was in return. I wanted him to be, I just hadn't voiced it before. Sure, I mentioned it in passing when we were out in the dark, before my panic attack _because_ it was dark, but I had never actually asked him if he was.

"I am. Are you?"

He leaned into me a little. "Every moment that I am with you," he whispered.

Even after all of the intense and intimate moments we had shared, he could still make me melt by the simplest of statements. If it wasn't for him guiding me, I don't think I could have found my way to Biology.

Mr. Molina was thrilled that Edward was joining his class. He was the quintessential teacher. The kind you put up for awards. He was happiest when children were learning. Any child, even ones _not_ enrolled in his class.

As Edward had predicted, Mr. Molina asked Mike to partner up with Ben, since his desk mate, Joey, was usually absent. Joey would probably have to work alone whenever he did bother to show.

With the start of class, Mr. Molina showed himself to be thirteen kinds of excited. His fieldtrip request to the greenhouse had been approved. And apparently, compost is cool. Everyone laughed at that.

I could picture going on the trip, on a bus, sitting next to Edward. We would ignore all the chaotic noise everyone would inevitably make and snuggle up to each other. We could hold hands as we strolled down the aisles of plants and flowers.

It was a good picture.

I smiled at Edward and discreetly reached for his hand under our desk. The familiar electric current arced and connected us.

I figured Gym would probably be embarrassing, but not exactly a problem. I'm not sure why I never considered the possibilities. What if in an unthinking moment, Edward moved too fast? Threw a ball too hard?

Because of his desire to be in every one of my classes, Edward passed on the choice to take a different subject for that period. Carlisle had stated that because of medical conditions, his participation needed to be minimal.

Apparently, minimal participation meant standing on the sidelines, acting like the towel and equipment boy, and essentially being the coach's assistant.

He looked adorable in his sweats and Forks High P.E. T-shirt, though. He also looked uncomfortable. Like he wanted nothing more than to be back in his regular attire. Attire that was clearly Alice's doing, but that suited him perfectly.

I felt his eyes on me the entire time. It was completely distracting. So much so, that when the ball came flying towards me, even though I knew it was, I just stood there. It hit me smack in the face!

It didn't hit me hard, but ow! Edward was to me so fast, I wondered if he had moved at a human enough speed.

Kids were tittering and murmuring. My getting injured was nothing new, and usually found to be humorous by others.

"Bella, are you hurt?"

I nodded. I promised him I would be honest about that, and I _was_ hurting. Not bad, but still. "Just a little. I'm okay."

I heard the coach sigh as he approached. "Mr. Cullen, could you please see Bella to the nurse's office?"

With the way he leaned in, I thought he was about to lift me. That would seem weird to the others. He would do so effortlessly, unthinking in his worry, and it would call attention to him. I quickly moved and pushed myself up to standing. Then I grabbed his arm, stopping him from lifting me and for support.

"Feel better, Bella!"

I gave Jessica a little wave, and then with Edward's unnecessary help – my feet worked fine; well, as fine as they have ever worked – I headed for the gym's double doors.

"I'm okay, Edward," I said as soon as we were outside. "It just stings a little."

He wasn't convinced. "I will have the nurse call Carlisle."

"That won't be necessary. Trust me. This kind of thing happens to me _constantly_. You promised to try, remember? I'm being honest with you. It hurts, but I'm okay. I've built up a high tolerance to pain."

I laughed, trying to lighten the mood, but he just scowled at me. I rolled my eyes back at him.

The nurse seemed to agree with me. No swelling, maybe slight bruising on the bridge of my nose, but otherwise, I was fine. That settled Edward down a little, but every time there was a moment when no one was looking, he was kissing my injury, and telling me how much he loved me.

I could have happily spent the rest of the school day and beyond in the office, with him doing that, but the nurse said I was fine to go back to class. Edward, being so very obstinate about my education, insisted I do. We were given tardy passes, then we were sent back to the locker rooms so that we could change out of our gym clothes.

Mr. Berty was irritated on many levels, when we showed up almost fifteen minutes late. Being late was the first.

Second, he didn't seem to care for Edward. He sighed heavily as he took his entrance slip into the class.

And third, he didn't like being asked if we could sit together. He didn't want to rearrange the class to accommodate that.

That was disappointing, but I figured there was no point in arguing. I started to head for my seat, but Edward gave my hand a tug, stopping me.

"Sir, with due respect, there is a solution that would require little rearranging of the current seating assignment. Simply ask Bella's desk mate to relocate next to my intended desk mate."

Edward's confidence held firm as Mr. Berty glared at him. But the logic was indisputable. He huffed as he agreed, then he went back into the lesson that was underway while we, as quietly as possible, all found our seats.

We didn't dare risk holding hands. Mr. Berty was annoyed enough, and was probably just looking for an excuse to separate us. But once, when the teacher's back was turned, Edward brushed his thumb across my knee.

I swallowed my gasp, then smiled over at him.

Having Edward in my every class was going to be interesting.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Note:**

Again, thank you so much for all the wonderful reviews. You have no idea how humbling and thrilling it is to read such compliments.

Okay, um, several people have either asked or commented on one thing in particular… I'm not ignoring you guys, but I was avoiding responding for a reason. While the direction may be obvious, I don't want to give anything away prematurely. So, if I have not answered a question you've posed, it's not because I'm ignoring you, it's because I'd rather you be surprised.

Megajonastwihard: I've done that before! Become so engrossed in something I stay up into the wee hours of the morning and ignore sleep! I am honored that you felt my story was _that_ good. I will not ignore your request, but I must be honest… it makes me uncomfortable to critique other people's works. I'm literally no one special, and don't feel I have the right to pass judgment onto others. Also, I am insanely busy. My sons just started back to school, I'm trying to finish the sequel to my novel, I'm trying to beta this fic for posting, I have two other fics I'm trying to iron out details for, etc. I am sorry, and hope this doesn't upset you.

And speaking of ironing out details of future fics…

I would like to post a short prologue here, and maybe get some opinions. Please, keep in mind, this is a rough draft, alternative universe, and is from EPOV, which is something I have not been able to do before successfully. If it doesn't completely suck, and people think this idea has potential, I will start on it after I finish posting this fic, and after I finish the last three chapters of my novel's sequel.

Thanks again for reading and reviewing, and MTLBYAKY

**Untitled**

Prologue

By: Jana~

**XXX**

My siblings often amuse me.

At that moment, I was wavering between amused and annoyed.

I wasn't pleased, either, but sometimes it is necessary to hunt the less appealing. We often adjust our activities based off the balance of nature in the area. Recently, there had been a surge in the deer population.

I much prefer mountain lion. Not for the thrill of the challenge, but simply because they taste better. Emmett prefers bear. Not because they taste better, but for the thrill.

Alice, as always, was indifferent. As I was, she was just waiting for Emmett to make a decision on how to best create entertainment for himself. Deer are docile creatures, and rarely put forth much of a fight during the brief struggle to survive.

Emmett is not fond of gentle game.

_If he doesn't hurry up and decide, I say we go and he can chase his down._

I gave my sister a nod of approval, watching as each of Emmett's decisions turned to visions inside Alice's mind. The one where he ended up in the river brought a smirk to my face.

I sensed it coming a second before it happened. The winds shifted, taking our scents to the herd of deer. They scattered, but I was unconcerned with that. New scents came with the change. The scents both enticed me and worried me.

Instincts drove me. I'm faster than most. My siblings struggled to keep up with me.

_Edward! Wait!_

A vision played out inside her head, but that just prepared me for what I was about to find. The vision then changed to something far more acceptable. Then it vanished. We both knew why.

Finally, I saw them, but he was too busy feasting to realize I was approaching. Surprise was my advantage. I hit him full force, sending him flying across the field. He righted himself quickly and took an offensive stance, crouching and hissing as I crouched over his victim defensively.

"That's mine!" he growled.

"Not rightfully! You are on claimed territory!"

_Like hell I am. Twerp is a scavenger._

His thoughts were preposterous, so I didn't bother responding to them. I just glared back and waited. He was eyeing me, trying to determine what my weaknesses were. I allowed it. I only needed a few seconds more.

_It's a Cullen!_

_They broke the treaty!_

_But who's the other one?_

_Wait for the command!_

_He's standing over her!_

The wolves' thoughts bombarded me all at once. I hissed in response, and to get their attention. "It wasn't me! Look at me eyes! Are they red? It was _him_!" I pointed at the trespassing vampire for emphasis.

The trespasser's thoughts filled with curse words and plans to flee. And then he did. All the wolves but the leader gave chase, just as Alice and Emmett arrived.

_He thinks you did it._

"He's not sure," I answered my sister. One thing that was for sure… he knew the victim. He was lamenting over the idea that, because she would now turn into the enemy of his tribe, he would have to kill her. I felt a pang of sympathy for his pain. "I might be able to help her, Jacob."

_You can save her?_

_Edward, no! It's not safe! I can't predict when the mutts are around!_

I ignored Alice. I was fully aware of the risk involved. If I failed to restrain myself, the treaty would likely be seen as broken and a war between the wolves and my family would break out. Starting with my death, and possibly Alice's and Emmett's as well.

"I can try. I cannot guarantee the outcome."

_Try. Please._

I knelt next to the young woman and located the wound. With where it was located, on her forearm, his intentions were clear. He had planned to drain her slowly while she suffered. Rage filled me, but I used it to get me through what I was about to attempt.

_Spit it out. You'll drain her and doom us all if you don't._

I took my sister's advice. The first pull tasted heavily of venom. If not for that, I might not have been able to spit it out. The second pull wasn't any weaker. There was no stopping the change from happening. I took a third pull, just to be certain. I didn't dare take another.

I glanced at Jacob and shook my head, then I sealed the wound closed with my tongue and placed her hand on her heaving chest. Her heart rate was fast and erratic. Her breathing was labored. She was twitching and convulsing alternately. The shock of her ordeal had, mercifully, rendered her unconscious.

_So, that's it? You can't save her?_

"Not her humanity, no. But she doesn't need to be destroyed. We can teach her to live as we do, if you will allow us to."

_I don't know… I can't…_

"Yes, you can. You are the alpha. You are the only one who can rightfully make this decision. I know you consider us the enemy, but this isn't her fault."

Jacob's thoughts jumped randomly. Memories of spending time with this girl intermixed with horrifying images of ripping her apart.

"It doesn't have to be like that," I assured him.

He seemed to be searching for opinions from the rest of his pack, but the only two still in wolf form were Seth and Embry. The rest had phased into their human forms so that they could burn the pieces of the dismembered vampire.

Seth and Embry were younger than Jacob, and offered nothing of help in making a decision.

_Pups in charge of anything besides where to find a good ass scratching tree is ridiculous!_

I ignored Emmett and tried again with Jacob. "You obviously care about her. She didn't ask for this to happen. Isn't a life such as this better than no life at all?"

Jacob's love for the girl and hatred of my kind battled for a moment within his thoughts. Finally, he conceded.

_Fine. Help her._

"Thank you."

As I began to lift her, Alice asked, "What's her name? How old is she?"

_Bella. Isabella Swan, but she goes by Bella. She just turned eighteen a few weeks ago._

"She goes by Bella," I said, translating Jacob's thoughts for my siblings. "She's eighteen."

_At least she's legal. Less complications._

I nodded at Emmett, then turned back to face Jacob. "Would you like us to contact you? Later? After?"

_I'm going to need some time._

He turned and left then, anger and anguish filling his mind. I felt pity for the boy. I also felt for the young, limp woman in my arms. The days ahead of her would be excruciating, I knew.

A few miles away from the clearing, as my siblings and I ran for home, I heard a lone, heartwrenching wolf cry.


	32. Chapter 32

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Thirty-Two

By: Jana~

**XXX**

We were halfway to Edward's car, his arm around my shoulders, my arm around his waist – we were being stared at again, but I didn't care – when my text message ringtone started going off.

My first thought was that it was Jessica. Possibly Angela. But, no.

"It's from my mom," I said, a bit bewildered. Mom knew how to text? Since when?

I quickly pulled up the message.

'We're home now. Come straight to the house. We'll get your stuff from the Cullens later.'

I felt a pang of sadness, and then a huge surge of guilt.

I should want to see my parents, right? And I did, but them being home signified an ending. An end I didn't want.

I wouldn't be able to see Edward nearly as often. I wouldn't get to fall asleep in his arms, or wake up against him.

"She wants me to go straight home," I told him as he opened my door for me. "I'll have to go back to your house later to get my stuff."

He gave a nod, then brushed the back of his fingers across my cheek. He could tell I was sad. I could see it in his eyes. Or maybe he was sad, too.

"It won't be so very different, I promise."

I sighed as I leaned into him. I wanted to believe that, but…

"At least I know I'll get to see you every day at school."

He shushed me consolingly, as his arms wrapped tightly around me. Time and space shifted.

I was conflicted between wanting to stay in Edward's world and returning to my own. My world seemed distant. Like it was a lifetime ago.

But school was also a part of my world. So were my friends. Edward had been able to integrate into that area of my life. Maybe I just needed to find a way to integrate him into my home life as well. Maybe then it wouldn't seem so devastating.

I needed to face it. Hiding in Edward's arms wouldn't be productive to anything long term.

"Okay, let's go," I whispered.

He inched away just a little and locked eyes with me. I was still in his arms. His compassionate expression urged the planet back into rotation.

"We love each other, that's the important thing."

I recognized my own words that I'd said to him on Monday being repeated back to me. They had clearly meant something to him. He seemed to be hoping that they would mean something to me now.

They did.

"I know. I'm okay. Or I will be," I added. I forced a slight yet determined smile onto my face as a way of proving that.

He smiled back, in that amused way I knew so well. "My brave little Bella."

He wasn't exactly teasing me, but I rolled my eyes anyway. Then I gave his lips a quick peck before climbing into the car.

We held hands for the entire trip to my house. The closer we got, the more anxious I became. The more anxious I became, the tighter his hold on my hand was.

He seemed tense, too, especially once we were minutes away. His jaw set. His form locked. His grip on the steering wheel tightened.

Clearly, my mood was rubbing off on him.

Or maybe not.

"I'm so sorry, Bella."

Huh? "What are you apologizing for?"

"Your parents know we spent a few days alone at your house. Jacob is there now. He depicted the situation negatively."

I didn't even have time to wrap my brain around that. We pulled up in front of the house, and sure enough, there was Jacob's bike.

Edward cut the engine and turned towards me. "I'm coming with you, to help explain."

I nodded, still confused. "What did he tell them?"

He sighed. "They're waiting for you."

That didn't answer my question. And apparently, he wasn't planning to. He left the car, rounded it, then opened my door and helped me out. I wanted to ask again, but I didn't. I would find out soon enough.

My parents looked both happy to see me and upset. With maybe a little bit of worried thrown in. Jacob looked a little guilty, but also pissed, though that seemed to be directed at Edward. His eyes narrowed when they flickered to mine and Edward's clasped hands.

"What's going on?" I asked.

My mom sighed heavily. "Jacob says that you and Edward spent a few days here? Alone?"

Was she asking me? Looking for me to confirm it?

Best to stick with the same lie. Consistency. "Yeah. His brother came down with the flu. Carlisle— um, Dr. Cullen, didn't want me to catch it."

I heard Jake scoff a little.

"Bells…" Dad pulled up his disciplinarian tone. He also seemed uncomfortable in his own skin. "We've never had to deal with this before… I mean, you've never had a boyfriend before…"

Wait. What? How did they know…?

I glanced briefly at Jacob. He didn't look guilty anymore. He almost looked smug.

"Please, baby…" Mom sounded both concerned and exasperated. "Just tell me you used protection."

All the blood rushed to my cheeks. I yanked my hand from Edward's reflexively.

"Chief Swan, Mrs. Swan, I promise you, my intentions toward your daughter are strictly honorable."

My parents eyed Edward incredulously. Suspiciously. They were almost glaring at him.

My embarrassment shifted into anger. "Oh my God! _Nothing_ happened! He just didn't want me to be home alone!"

They stared back at me for a long few moments, seemingly shocked by my outburst. I had never once yelled at my parents before. Not since I was two or three years old, at least.

Charlie looked like he wanted to believe me. Renee clearly didn't.

"You're at risk for a lot worse than an unwanted pregnancy these days. There are sexually transmitted diseases—"

"Bah!" I didn't know what to say, but I needed to stop her talking. "_Nothing_!_ Happened_!" I repeated insistently.

"Okay…" My dad sighed. Heavily. "I think it's time for your friends to leave."

Translated: we're going to keep talking about this, but not while the boy who deflowered you and the boy who told us about it are standing here.

Jacob started heading towards the door. I grabbed Edward's hand, stopping him from doing so.

"I'm going to walk Edward out. I'll be right back."

"I'm sure he can find his way," Charlie said.

His tone was firm. I didn't care.

"What, you think we're going to _do_ something on the way to his car?" Okay, bad joke, in poor taste and timing, but I was _mad_. "I'll be right back!"

I didn't even wait for a response. I just started dragging Edward behind me.

Jacob was almost to his bike, but I was gaining the ground. Edward continued to allow me to pull him along with.

"What the hell, Jake?"

He spun around to face me. "You might hate me now, but I did it for your own good."

"Oh, please," I scoffed. "That was _so_ not your motivation! You implied we were here having sex!"

His eyes dropped to mine and Edward's hands.

I scoffed again. "Holding hands means we're having sex? I think your school on the rez needs to offer some new Health Ed. classes."

"He's not safe, Bella. If you won't believe me, maybe your parents will be able to talk some sense into you."

"You're being paranoid, Jake. Edward would never hurt me."

Jacob's eyes narrowed on Edward, but he still spoke to me. "You don't know what he's capable of."

Yeah, I did. I couldn't tell Jake that, though. "And you do?"

His eyes were back on mine. They softened. He seemed wounded. "Why didn't you return my messages?"

Huh? What messages? "I didn't get any messages from you."

"I sent you dozens. You never responded. I even came here on Wednesday night, to check up on you, but you were gone."

Edward tightened his hold on my hand.

Okay, yeah, Forks had iffy cell phone service, but that usually meant a dropped call on occasion, or a couple of missed texts here and there. I wouldn't have missed _dozens_.

I pulled my phone out of my pocket so that I could check the history.

"Bella," Edward whispered, "please don't think too poorly of me." I blinked up at him, confused. "I was trying to protect you. I only did it because I didn't want him to upset you."

Huh? Do what? "What are you talking about?"

He sighed. "I blocked his number."

"What?" I nearly screeched at him, then I pulled up the settings on my phone to try and figure out exactly what he had done. "You had… no right… messing with…" What the hell? How did he do this? "Fix it!" I demanded as I shoved the phone at him.

It took him seconds, then he handed it back.

I waggled it at him before pushing it back into my pocket. "We're going to talk about this!" I snapped. Then I turned back to Jacob. He was smirking. "You can wipe that look off your face! I'm pissed at you, too! At least Edward's intentions were good!"

"And you think mine weren't?" He huffed, then turned his back on me and started for his bike.

I stomped after him. "I'm not done talking to you yet!"

"I have nothing more to say."

"Well I have tons! I was planning to tell my parents what happened! I was just going to do it _without_ the inappropriate implications!"

"Well now they know," he said. "Go set them straight." He didn't give me a chance to respond. His eyes shifted over to Edward. "We'll be watching you."

It sounded like a threat. Edward just stared back, unconcerned.

After Jake kick-started his bike and took off, I spun around on Edward.

"You had no right! You have to trust me!"

"I _do_ trust you. It's _him_ I don't trust."

He was calm, despite the fact that I was essentially yelling at him. He sounded remorseful. Troubled. Genuinely worried. It softened me.

I closed the gap between us and fell into his arms. "I can handle Jake, Edward."

We both knew what I meant by that. I had often wondered, but now I was sure. Jake _liked_ me, and Edward, being able to read his mind, was sure of that, too. And was jealous.

"Bella, you have to understand, your safety is everything to me."

I sighed. "Jacob's not going to hurt me, Edward."

"Maybe not intentionally. Maybe not physically."

I didn't have time to get into that with him. My parents were waiting. I was surprised they hadn't come out looking for me.

"We're going to have a discussion about this later," I told him, pushing out of his arms. "I don't want to get grounded, and if I don't go in there—"

"Bella, love, wait."

The intensity in his tone and expression made my nerves prickle. "What? What's wrong?"

Something _was_ wrong. I could sense it. My adrenalin spiked.

"I'm so sorry…" I could tell he wasn't apologizing for the phone thing again. "Love, it's time."

Time? Time for what? I didn't think I'd said that out loud, but maybe I had.

"Your mother has decided. That is why they asked Jacob and me to leave."

Wait. What? "Now?"

"Yes. I'm so sorry."

My head started spinning.

I figured it wouldn't be much longer – Edward had said 'soon' – but _now_? I had been thinking months. Maybe weeks. At least days!

He pulled me into his arms. "I will remain nearby," he whispered, "should you need me."

I felt numb. Detached. In a surreal state of reality.

I nodded against him, then I shifted out of his embrace and headed for the house. I heard his car door open and close as I approached the steps. I heard him start the engine as I climbed them. I heard him drive away as I crossed the threshold.

My parents watched me as I entered the living room. Dad asked me to sit down. Mom was fidgeting. I stared at the floor.

"Baby, your father and I have decided that we… we need some time apart."

What a nice way to say it. That makes everything okay.

Yeah, not so much.

"You're getting a divorce." My voice sounded weird. Not like my voice at all.

"Well… yeah. We tried. We really did. But…"

"You're not happy." I continued to stare at the floor.

"No. We haven't been for a while. We both want you to know, this isn't your fault."

I knew that. "I'm not eight, Mom. I know how divorce works. I know it's not my fault."

There was a tiny hole in the carpet, about six inches in front of the couch. I wondered how it got there.

"We both still love you, is what your mother is trying to say. We will always love you, no matter what."

I knew that, too. "I know."

How had I ever wished for this to happen? I just wanted them to be happy. But no one seemed very happy.

"I know this is hard for you, baby, but, we need— we need to know… who you want to… live with."

I answered without any hesitation. "Dad."

I heard my mom gasp. She wasn't expecting me to answer so quickly. She wasn't expecting me to pick my dad. Or maybe both surprised her.

"You don't have to answer right away. You can sleep on it, and—"

I looked up for the first time since reentering the house. "Where do you plan to live?"

Mom's surprise seemed to grow. Her eyebrows arched a little higher. Her mouth dropped open a little more.

And then a slight, strained, awkward smile showed itself. "I was thinking about Arizona. It's sunny there all the time. We could start fresh. Wouldn't that be nice?"

Nice? "No, Mom, that wouldn't be _nice_. I don't want to start over someplace new, going into my senior year of high school! My _life_ is here!"

"But, think of the possibilities—"

"I don't want to think about the possibilities!" I snapped, interrupting her. "You're the one who wants to change things! I like things the way they are. I _like_ Forks! I'm staying with Dad! Someone should," I added coldly.

Okay, it was a low a blow, but I was _pissed_. I never imagined I would be, but I was.

She looked wounded. I didn't care.

And I was done talking. I pushed off the chair and stomped dramatically up to my room.

I slammed and locked the door after storming through it, then I spun around and…

You know the saying 'leap out of your own skin'? Yeah…

"How—?"

I didn't care how. I took three long strides and threw myself into Edward's arms.

Anger shifted into grief. I burst into tears.

"Shhh, love, I know."

"I hurt her," I whispered.

"She will forgive you."

I shook my head. "She won't. You didn't see her face."

He held me tighter. "The window. That's how I got in here."

I still didn't care. I clung to him as he stroked my hair. Time froze.

"Charlie is coming."

Fear shot through me. I pushed out of his arms and turned towards the door. Almost immediately, I spun back around. I had planned on telling him to hide, but he wasn't there. Confused, I did two full three-sixties, trying to locate him.

"Bells?"

I glanced around the room one last time before opening the door.

He looked horrible. His eyes were glistening and hollow, his mouth was downturned, his body was slumped.

"Yeah?" My voice didn't sound like my own again.

He sighed. He seemed to be searching for the right words to say to me.

He finally decided on, "Are you sure this is what you want?"

No. This wasn't what I wanted. Not at all. But I knew he didn't mean the situation. He meant my choosing to stay with him, instead of going with Mom to Arizona.

I nodded. "When is she leaving?"

"Tonight. Soon. She's staying at the inn, until she makes the arrangements…"

His words choked off. He sighed again. He slumped a little more.

I threw myself into his arms.

I wanted my parents to be happy. Unfortunately, for one to be happy, meant the other would be miserable.

Charlie didn't want this. Renee did.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

I heard him take in a shaky breath. Then I heard a knock at the door.

Startled, I pushed back and turned towards the sound.

"Mrs. Swan, I apologize for disturbing your family, but with your permission, I would like to take Bella to my house so that she may collect her things."

My mom said something in response, but I ignored it. I looked to my dad.

He gave a nod, then added, "It's a school night. Ten-thirty curfew."

I hugged him again, fiercely, but only for a second, then I ran down the stairs, past my mom and Edward, and straight for his car. I almost died three times, but I recovered. Apparently, death by face-plant was not what the fates had in store for the evening.

I didn't wait for Edward to open my door for me. I yanked the handle and threw myself inside.

I stared at the dashboard, knowing my mom was watching me from the doorway of the house. I didn't even glance at Edward as he slipped in behind the wheel.

He said nothing as he started the car and pulled away from the curb.

"My dad doesn't want this," I said.

"I know. I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I didn't feel it was my place to say."

We remained silent for the entire rest of the trip to his house.

He parked in front, cut the engine, and then we just sat there. I have no idea how much time passed. It didn't feel like minutes. It didn't feel like years. Time was suspended.

"Will you take a trip with me?"

I nodded.

Somehow, I knew where we were going.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Note:**

Seems you guys like the prologue to the potential fic. Excellent. I appreciate your feedback on that. I'm still struggling to get Edward's 'voice' right, but I'm breezing through _Midnight Sun_ again, hoping it will help. I'm about halfway into chapter one, but I need to get a bit more written before I will feel comfortable posting it. I also need a name and summary for it.

ADarnell: The possible future fic would not be a love triangle story. Jacob 'loves' her like friends and family 'love'. He's not 'in love' with her. I don't care for the love triangle aspect, either. I view all of it as a plot complication, and nothing more. Sorry to all the 'team Jacob' fans out there.

This chapter is a bit small. The next one will be, too. Sorry about that. Trust me, the epilogue chapter will more than make up for that. I'm still toying with cutting that chapter in two. Even if I do, each part will be over six thousand words.

Lostliveson4eva: This fic will be thirty-five chapters (or thirty-six, if I break the epilogue into two chapters).

Thank you so very much for continuing to read and review. I hope everyone is still enjoying it as we near the end.

MTLBYAKY


	33. Chapter 33

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Thirty-Three

By: Jana~

**XXX**

Somehow, I knew where we were going, but not because I recognized the journey's path. All trees look the same to me, anyway. Add to that, them racing towards you at the speed of light… It's hard to get your bearings.

I knew where we were going because I could just somehow sense it. It was logical. It was _our_ place.

I gravitated towards the blues and purples as soon as Edward had set me on my feet. There was no sun streaming through the forest's edge. It seemed fitting that there wasn't. Like nature was mimicking my mood.

I dropped down in the very spot we had occupied twice before. I stared at the grass as Edward joined me.

"I didn't think I'd be this upset," I finally said.

"It's understandable that you are."

I shrugged. "I suppose. It's sure the way they depict it in movies and in books. I don't know why I thought it would be any different for me."

"You are more perceptive, braver, than most. Your unique understanding and courage shrouded your emotions."

Maybe, but none of that mattered. My parents were getting a divorce, my dad was on the verge of devastated, and I was…

I didn't know what I was. At that moment, I was mad at my mom and sad for my dad. Otherwise, I had no clue how to feel.

I sighed, then crawled over and climbed into Edward's lap. He wrapped his arms around me consolingly.

"I'm still mad at you," I whispered.

"I know. I'm angry with myself as well. I was only trying to save you pain."

"You can't save me from everything, Edward. At some point, pain _will_ happen. Physical. Emotional. It's inevitable."

"If there is a way I can find to spare you from it, I will. Your pain, any amount of it, in any aspect, is unacceptable."

I sighed again. A blanket understanding just wasn't going to happen. I would have to tackle each situation as they presented themselves.

I started with the current one. "I know Jake has a thing for me, okay? I wasn't sure before, but I am now. It doesn't change anything. I'm not happy that I have to reject him – hurt him – but we'll both get through it. He'll get over it in time. Maybe we can even be friends again. It's not a pleasant situation, but it's not exactly causing me pain, either. Just… let me handle it. _My_ way. Okay?"

He took in a deep breath. His arms tightened around me. "Yes."

I could tell by his tone that it was hard for him to agree to that. But he _did_ agree. Progress.

"Thank you. So, no more messing with my phone?"

"No," he said. "No more… messing… with your phone."

I smirked at that. He had been trying so hard to sound casual lately, even when we were alone. Or maybe I was just rubbing off on him.

"Good. Thank you for that, too."

Snuggling in a little deeper, I rested my forehead against his neck and inhaled deeply. I wasn't necessarily looking to get affectionate, but I wanted to feel that familiar connection to him. That deep, profound bond that always seemed to lift my spirits.

I needed my spirits lifted. I needed to feel happy. I wanted a break from the intensity of the crap going on with my parents. There would be plenty of time later to deal with that.

He seemed to understand that.

He kissed the top of my head, allowing his lips to linger there, and then he inched his hand into my jacket and danced his fingers across my hip. It was a slow ascent from there.

Our joint descent to the grass beneath us was faster. But the intimacy that followed wasn't frenzied. It was gentle. Almost comforting. He knew what I needed, and he was fulfilling each one of those needs.

Well, every need but one. He was avoiding my neck again. I gave him the cue more than once, but he refused to take it each and every time.

I thought we had gotten passed that. What happened to compromise? Though I still didn't know what he had meant by that. What was it a compromise to?

I tried to reason through it, as Edward continued to hold me, and caress me.

He wanted to do it. That was clear from the beginning. And I wanted him to do it. There didn't seem to be any kind of need for a compromise there.

But even with us both wanting it, every time I offered myself to him, he would tell me no.

Except for that last time. What was different then?

I hadn't offered myself to him then. Or at least not at first. He just did it. Did he see it as a form of pressure when I _did_ offer myself? Was the compromise that I needed to just let him lead?

That didn't seem likely for some reason. That seemed more like _me_ compromising, not _him_.

What else was different about that last time?

I fought to remember.

He had given me a hickey. He was upset about the fact that he had, too.

But how could that be a compromise? A compromise to what?

Oh.

Oh, God.

I had been so stupid. So blind.

Amazingly. Perceptive. My. Ass.

Not only could I not add two plus two plus two, but apparently, I also couldn't add three plus three. Which, ironically, equated to the same answer.

It took all of the eleven and a half days since knowing Edward was a vampire for it to finally click. When it did, everything made sense. _Everything_.

Rosalie's cryptic words.

"_We all have choices to make, Bella. I don't hate you. I hate the choices you're about to make."_

Alice's conversation.

"_He thinks he's encouraging you to be something you're not. Something he thinks you'll regret being later."_

Alice's visions. The ones I heard her telling Edward about when I had been eavesdropping.

"_It's going to happen, Edward. I've seen it."_

"_It doesn't have to be that way. Your visions are subjective. The future can always be changed."_

"_I know that. But I've seen it transpire in a dozen different ways. Eventually, one way or another—"_

"_Is it possible that these visions…? I don't think she understands…"_

"_I don't think she does, either. That's why the visions are hazy. But they _are_ her decisions, Edward. They're just locked inside her subconscious."_

The draw for me when Edward would kiss my neck. The instinct to _offer_ myself to him.

I realized that Alice had been right. It had been a subconscious thought this whole time.

I wanted Edward to _bite_ me. I wanted him to _change_ me.

And then I remembered the other couple of sentences I had heard between Alice and Edward, earlier that morning on the way to breakfast.

"_It might save _you_ a lot of heartache, and _her_ a lot of confusion."_

"_I would rather wait for her to figure it out on her own."_

That was what the problem had been all along. He wanted to change me, but he wasn't sure if I wanted him to. He wasn't sure if I had even considered the possibility. He wanted it to be _my_ choice.

It was all so simple, the fact that it had eluded me for so long was baffling.

It solved every problem! I would never grow old. Never die and leave him behind. He wouldn't be in pain around me. We could be intimate without fear of him hurting me. We could be together forever.

I remembered him saying that the venom was excruciating, but the pain involved was just the smaller picture. My focus became the bigger picture.

My mind was made up. Determinedly, I brushed my hair to the side and offered myself to him again. And in case that was too subtle for him, I said the actual words.

"I'm ready, Edward."

I closed my eyes, then waited. But nothing happened.

His hands were still, I realized. I could feel his stare on me.

Slowly, I allowed my lids to flutter open.

He looked stern. Confused. Frightened.

"Bella, no."

No? What, no? "Why not? It solves everything. Every problem."

He sat up, then I did, too. Our eyes remained locked.

"That would not be a solution. It would be a tragedy."

"Why? If I were like you—"

"No." He sounded so absolute. "I won't end your life for you."

Wait. So, he didn't want to change me? My heart lurched. I could feel the tears pricking at the back of my eyes. It felt like a rejection.

"But it's not an ending," I whispered. "It's a beginning." I was sure I sounded pathetic. Pleading. Desperate.

As if confirming that, he took my hand in both of his and stroked the knuckles with his thumb.

"That's what you call a beginning?" His tone was softer. Gentler. "Becoming a monster?"

Of course it would come back to that.

"You're not a monster, Edward," I said firmly, then added more carefully, "And I'd like to think I wouldn't be one, either."

He sighed. "You don't know what you're saying. You don't want this."

That wasn't true. I knew what I was saying. I knew what I wanted.

"I want to be with you. Forever."

His eyes shone with compassion as he continued to stare back at me for several intense seconds. Or maybe it was weeks.

"Is it not enough, just to have a long and happy life with me?"

Honestly? No. It wasn't. And what if it wasn't a long life? What if I got hit by a bus? Or became terminally ill? With my accident proneness, the possibilities for my early death were endless.

But that aside…

My staying human didn't solve anything. I would still eventually die. Then Edward would only have the memory of me to sustain him. To use his words.

Even after acclimating, he would always be in some pain around me. We would always be limited in what we could do intimately, due to his fear of losing control.

He would always be worried about me because of my frailty. His life would consist of nothing more than trying to protect me from everything. His full time occupation and labor of love.

And then there was the whole rose and the weed problem. He in perfect bloom for always, me withering and dying slowly through the years. If I did live for a long time, how much pain would that cause him to witness?

More than he deserved. More than _I_ could bear to witness.

My thoughts made me more emotional than I had already been.

"No, it's not," I answered him. "I want longer than that with you."

There was a hint of pain in the smile he gave me, and then he gathered me back into his arms.

It seemed he had changed his mind.

"You're ready right now?"

I let out a shuddery breath, in both fear and anticipation, when he raked my hair away from my neck and slowly kissed a path to it. Fear of the pain. Fear of the unknown. But anticipation for what it would mean. An eternity with Edward.

I tilted my head and closed my eyes. I started to tremble. "Yes." My voice caught on the simple word.

I wondered for how long the pain would last. I considered what I might say to my parents.

But the anticipation was for nothing. The pain never came.

"You're safe," he whispered.

He hadn't changed his mind at all. He was making a point. He knew I was scared.

That didn't change my mind, though. A lot of things in life are scary, but people still did them. I still wanted this.

"Alice said she saw it happening," I said shakily.

The idea of it was still affecting me, as was Drug Edward. I was also nervous about admitting to him that I had eavesdropped before.

He pulled back and stared at me with a sort of… kind sternness. No, a questioning, kind sternness.

"I wasn't trying to overhear," I defended myself weakly. "I just did."

"Her visions change…"

"Based on what people decide," I added. "I've decided, Edward."

"No, Bella. My soul may be lost but I _will_ protect yours. You don't know how the idea of this has tortured me."

He _looked_ tortured right then. Down to the depths of the soul he apparently believed he had lost.

"That's why you won't change me? Because you think it will damn my soul to hell?"

His tormented expression remained. "I love you too much to take the risk."

It was an indirect answer to my question, but that was a yes. There was no way he didn't have a soul.

"I love _you_ too much _not_ to."

He scoffed a little. It almost sounded like a chuckle. "You're so stubborn."

I scowled back at him. "So are you."

He smirked, and then he brought me back into his arms. His lips were right next to my ear. It sent a jolt of adrenalin through me.

"May I suggest a compromise?" he whispered. I nodded, speechless. "Give me five years. If your decision stands, I will reconsider."

Five years? I would be forever twenty-two to his forever seventeen?

"That's too long," I said.

He sighed. "Then three years."

That was still too long. "Why?"

"I know the consequences of this. I've lived through it. I want you to be sure."

That was only part of it.

"I _am_ sure. You're hoping I'll change my mind."

"Yes."

At least he was honest.

I sighed as I pushed out of his arms, then I took his hand as I lied down in the grass. He joined me.

With everything else murky and confused, one thing was perfectly clear. Nothing was going to happen tonight.

"Fine," I said finally, after watching the sky blankly for an indeterminate amount of decades. "I won't agree to five years, or even three, but I will agree to wait. I'll agree to think it over some more, if you'll agree to honor my decision when the time comes. Deal?"

I turned my head only to look over at him. He was already staring at me, his expression holding a multitude of emotions again. Love. Fear. Sympathy. Frustration. There were more, but I couldn't name them all.

"I will agree to consider it," he said.

Ugh! Frustrating man! That was obviously just lip service! And he calls _me_ stubborn!

But I knew that was the best I was going to get out of him. I rolled my eyes and turned them towards the sky again.

We were both silent for years as I fumed. I could feel him staring at me. I knew what was coming.

"Will you share your thoughts with me?"

Yeah.

"You won't like them." But if he pressed for me to tell him, I would.

"I still wish to know them."

Sighing, I closed my eyes, then blurted out, "You're not the only vampire I know."

The implication was clear. I studied the inside of my eyelids as I waited for his response.

"Bella, please, if you value my sanity…"

"I'm not trying to drive you insane," I whispered.

Bravely – or better put, stupidly – I opened my eyes and looked over at him.

Yeah, I should have kept them closed. He was in the fires of hell again, because of me. I quickly turned away from him.

"Why are you so against me becoming like you?" I asked. I sounded like I was ready to burst into tears. I felt like I was, too. Did he not want to be with me for forever like I did him?

He inched up behind me, spooning me, and gathered me into his arms. His lips were right at my ear again.

"I told you why," he whispered.

I shook my head. "There's more to it than that. Be honest with me."

"Your pain, any amount of it, in any aspect, for any reason, is unacceptable. To cause your suffering, just for the sake of never having to lose you, would be the most selfish thing I could ever do."

"But the pain wouldn't last forever."

"I'm not just referring to the physical pain. Have you not considered the reason for why Rosalie appears to dislike you?"

That startled me. I turned in his arms to face him. He offered me a sympathetic smile as he raked his hand into my hair. His thumb brushed against my cheek in a comforting manner.

"She's envious of you, Bella. She would give anything to be human again. We all would. We didn't have a choice, but you do."

"Being human isn't that great," I muttered. Not when it meant losing the only person I would ever love.

"You say that now. Your life has barely begun. After decades of never changing, of having all your possibilities taken from you, you might feel differently. This cannot be undone. I will not risk your potential happiness like that. I couldn't live with myself if you came to regret your decision."

But there could be no happiness without him.

It was at those times that I wished he could read my mind. If he could just grasp how absolutely sure I was.

"I'll give you one year," I said. I wasn't so sure bargaining with him would work, but I had to try. "I'll be smart about it. I'll weigh the pros and cons. I'll talk to every member of your family. If after one year, if I'm still certain, will you change me?"

He stared at me for centuries. Studying me. Considering his words. And then he gathered me against him and nuzzled into my hair.

"On one condition."

We were so close. I could feel the 'yes' in the air. My heart started racing.

"What's the condition?"

He took forever to answer.

"Marry me, Bella."

**To be continued…**

**Author's Note:**

Okay, I want to quick and explain something here. Since this fic takes place over a two week period of time, his asking her to marry him probably seems to some like it's rushing, and therefore unrealistic. But, to me, it's not.

First, he's not expecting to marry her in three days time or anything. Engagements usually last a little while, and even in _Eclipse_ (movie version, at least), he tells her there's no rush when she sets the date in August.

Second, they've already essentially committed themselves to being with each other. He's been waiting his entire existence for her. He's certain she's 'the one', and has been (certain) since pretty much the beginning. Bella is more resistant to the idea of marriage in the books/movies, but canon Bella came from a broken home. And, yeah, in my fic, her parents do finally split, but not until she's old enough to understand. That alone can change things a bit. Throughout the fic, she does teeter back and forth on the issue, but ultimately, I think, deep down, she would want to be married to Edward. Regardless to how her parents' marriage was and ended. Regardless to their young ages. She says in _Eclipse_ (again, the movie version) that marriage is just a piece of paper. That cuts both ways. It can be used as an argument for or against marriage. If you view it as just a piece of paper, why bother? Or, alternatively, why not just do it, especially if you're already planning on being with the person for all of eternity?

And third, my parents got engaged after knowing each other for exactly two weeks. They got married three months after that. They were a few months away from celebrating their thirty-sixth wedding anniversary when she passed away suddenly.

So, yeah. Thus ends my really long babble session, justifying my having him propose to her now as opposed to later. And I kinda gave away what her answer will be, didn't I? Oh well, LOL! It's not like y'all didn't see it coming, right? (grin)

Initially, no one showed any interest in knowing which lines in chapter twenty-nine made me cry. But someone asked in a review of the last chapter, so I will go ahead and answer it…

"Bella, I will always love you. Always. I will love you until the day you die. And then I will merely exist on the memory of you for the rest of my eternity."

Oh, great. That didn't make me feel guilty at all. It also made me cry.

I crawled over to him and climbed into his lap.

"Shhh, love, don't cry. The memory of you will sustain me."

**X**

Yeah. So, anyway…

Only two chapters left now. I have to admit, I'm a bit sad. It feels like something special is coming to an end. Hopefully, the new fic I'm working on will be as well received. It's been difficult for me to get Edward's inner voice right, but has been interesting at the same time. I enjoy a challenge. He might be a bit 'off', but I like what I have so far.

I have decided to leave the epilogue chapter as one, instead of breaking it up into two. I think it will read better that way. Still deciding if I like the final two or so lines, though. I might change them at the last second.

Okay, I'm done rambling on now.

Thanks for putting up with me! And MTLBYAKY


	34. Chapter 34

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Thirty-Four

By: Jana~

**XXX**

My body exploded. My heart lurched. My breathing stopped.

But my mind raced.

Edward in a tuxedo. Me in a flowing white dress. My father giving me away. Angela as my Maid of Honor. Alice as my bridesmaid. Jasper and Emmett as Edward's best men. My mom, Carlisle, and Esme, beaming at us from the first row.

The images assaulted me, one after the other.

That was a condition? He would change me, I would get to be with him forever, _and_ I would get to be married to him?

"Breathe, Bella."

Right. Breathing. Good idea.

I gasped in air. My lungs hurt. My head spun.

"You don't have to answer now."

Wait. Didn't I already answer him? I tried to remember, but my brain wasn't functioning properly.

I shifted back a little and locked eyes with him. "Yes."

The sweetest smile took over his face. And then I was vertical. We both were. The movement was so fluid, I didn't even realize it until we were spinning.

He set me onto my feet, and then he was staring at me, his eyes intense, his hand in my hair.

"I don't wish for you to feel pressured into marrying me," he said. He was suddenly very serious.

I smiled, reassuringly, hoping to ease his concerns. "I don't. I want you to change me, but I also want to be married to you."

He smiled then, too. With relief. I wrapped my arms around his neck when he leaned in and pressed his lips to mine. But the kiss was short lived.

His eyes were steady on mine for a moment, and then they shifted a little to the left. His expression held the slightest hint of annoyance. It confused me.

"Alice."

He had barely said her name when I heard giggling and rustling in the near distance. And then she was there, right in front of us, looking like she was about to explode with joy.

"Come on!" she squealed. "Everyone's waiting!"

She near about threw me onto Edward's back, and then we were running.

Edward kept pace with her, even though he was faster than she was.

All the rest of the Cullens were waiting for us when we got to the house. Everyone was wearing wide smiles except for Rosalie.

"I hear congratulations are in order?"

Carlisle said this like a question. Alice squeaked.

Edward knew I was uncomfortable. His grip on my hand tightened.

I glanced at Alice before dropping my attention to the ground. "Um, yeah."

Their level of excitement told me they approved, but of the wedding or my wanting to be changed I wasn't sure. I needed to be sure.

"Since you all obviously know what's going on, I'd like to get your… opinions." I continued to stare at the floor.

I wanted more than just their opinions. I wanted them on my side. If the Cullens were okay with me being a member of their family – truly a member – then maybe Edward wouldn't be so against the idea.

"The only way I can think of for it to be fair, is to put it up for a vote." I finally braved a glance around the room. Everyone was still smiling. Again, except for Rosalie, but I already knew what her vote was going to be.

Emmett leapt forward, and then I was suddenly in his arms and the room was spinning.

"I vote 'hell yeah'! Keep him on his toes, little one!"

When he set me back down, I felt a little unstable. Edward wrapped his arm around my waist to steady me.

"I already consider you my sister," Alice chirped. "My vote is, of course, yes."

"I vote yes," Jasper said. He was trying to smile, but it looked strained. "It would be nice to not want to kill you all the time."

I was sure he meant that a little like a joke, but he was also very serious. It was also a helpful thing for him to say. I knew then for sure that they all realized what I was asking.

"I'm sorry," Rosalie said. "I know my opinion won't matter, but I vote no."

I felt a surge of sympathy for Rosalie. The sadness in her tone made me want to console her, but I knew there were no words I could say that would. She would never be able to understand my choices, because her circumstances were different from mine, even though I wasn't exactly sure what hers were.

I could only assume she had been near death at the time, since Edward had said that Carlisle would never change someone who had another choice.

I averted my eyes as I gave a nod, then I looked to Esme. Her smile put me at ease a little.

"I already consider you a part of the family. Yes."

All eyes in the room then landed on Carlisle. He took two steps forward, his expression serious but kind.

My adrenalin spiked.

I'd had a pretty good idea of what the others would say, and I had guessed right, but Carlisle was still a bit of a mystery to me. I held my breath nervously as I waited for him to speak.

When he finally did, he surprised me.

"I know what this means to you, son. When the time comes, are you sure you can see it through?"

I knew he wasn't talking about the wedding. I looked up at Edward, interested in the answer to that question as well.

"I'm hoping she will change her mind," he said. His eyes never left Carlisle's.

"And if she doesn't?"

A slight, pained sigh escaped him. "I will keep my promise to her."

Carlisle then turned to me. My heart sputtered and my breath caught.

"Are you certain this is what you want?"

I nodded, then forced my voice not to fail. "Yes." The confidence I had hoped to show was completely absent. I tried again. "I promised him I would take the next year to consider the pros and cons. But, yes, I'm sure."

There. That sounded better.

Or maybe it didn't.

"I will support whatever decision you make, but this isn't to be taken lightly."

Edward seemed grateful for the fatherly words I had been given. He pulled me a little closer to him and nuzzled my hair.

"I know," I whispered. I dropped my gaze to the ground again. "I'm not taking it lightly."

Carlisle nodded. His smile grew a little and his seriousness eased slightly. "I'm pleased to hear that you will be taking a year to consider what this will mean." He closed the gap between us and wrapped his arms around me.

It felt good. I felt accepted.

"If there is anything you should need from me, don't hesitate to ask."

I nodded. The tension seemed to dissipate after that. Alice came bounding over to me again as Carlisle stepped away. Then she pulled me into the center of the room.

"Okay," she said excitedly, "a white dress, that's a given." She spun me around. "A short train. Don't want you to kill yourself on the way to the altar!"

Edward growled, but Alice ignored him. She started messing with my hair.

"Hair up, maybe with flowers in it. Oh, and—"

"Alice." Edward's tone was harsh. Scolding. "She could still change her mind."

She waved her hand at him dismissively. "You know she's not going to. You can see my visions as clearly as I can. And stop looking!" she snapped.

Edward rolled his eyes.

"What are your thoughts on cleavage?" she asked me. My face burst into flames.

Edward growled again, and then he was at my side. He wrapped his arm around my waist and started leading me towards the stairs.

"Oh, fine!" Alice huffed. "There's plenty of time still."

Apparently, Alice was going to be my wedding coordinator. I didn't mind. She would certainly be better at it than I would be, and cheaper than a professional. I doubted she would charge me. Really, the only thing it would probably end up costing me was my dignity.

A small price to pay, as long as Edward was on the other end of the room when I walked down the aisle.

The second we stepped foot inside his bedroom, Edward gathered me into his arms.

"I'm sorry if she overwhelmed you," he whispered.

I shook my head. "She didn't. I'm not going to change my mind, you know," I added quickly.

I knew he would understand what I meant by that. I wasn't just referring to marrying him.

He sighed heavily. His arms tightened around me.

Yeah, he knew.

"I will continue to hope, until the moment before it happens, that you will."

"Will you be upset with me when I don't?" I asked.

He sighed again. When he pulled back, his eyes were intense. He looked frustrated.

That was a yes.

"No. I won't be upset with you."

Okay, maybe not. Or maybe he was lying to me. My eyes narrowed on him incredulously.

He made a tiny scoffing sound in response. "Yes, I will be upset, but not with you. Never with you."

That was a split-hair debate I didn't even know where to begin to argue. Shifting out of his embrace, I plopped myself down on the edge of his bed. He joined me.

"I wish you could read my mind right now. If you could, you would know how sure I am about this. Then, maybe, you wouldn't be so against it."

"I don't doubt that you are certain of this decision now. What about later? What will your thoughts be like decades from now, when it is too late to change your mind?"

"If you are by my side decades from now, I won't regret it."

"I will always be by your side. Willingly. Happily. You don't have to change for that to be so."

"But _I_ won't always be by _your_ side. Unless I'm changed."

That hurt my case more than it helped it. He sighed despondently.

"Can you not see how this might upset me? It is because of me that you're doing this. You're giving up your humanity for me."

"I'm not just doing this for you."

He seemed shocked by that. To be honest, I was, too. Yes, he had been the main motivation for making the decision, but he wasn't the only motivation.

"Not to minimize your importance, but you're not the only reason I want to do this."

My thoughts weren't at all gathered or formed, but I started explaining myself anyway. He was waiting for me to, and my heart seemed to understand things better than my brain did anyway.

"I've never felt comfortable in my own skin. I've literally spent my whole life stumbling through each day. I've never felt normal. Because I'm not normal. But with you, while with you, while in your world, I've actually felt normal for the first time, ever. This is where I'm meant to be. _What_ I'm meant to be. Not just _with_ you, but _like_ you. The whole idea of it just… makes sense."

His pained expression eased considerably. He actually cracked a hint of a smile.

"So, it's not just about me?" he asked.

Emmett laughed. As Edward's smile dropped, mine grew.

"Shut up, Emmett. In a year, I _will_ be able to kill you."

Edward's smile returned. We both ignored the laughter from downstairs as we fell into each other's arms.

"No, it's not _just_ about you," I whispered. "I'll still spend the next year thinking about it. Talking to your family. Learning all that I can. Weighing the pros and cons. But I won't be changing my mind, Edward. I know I won't. Nothing has ever felt so right in my life."

He nodded against me, and then he brushed my hair aside and began to nuzzle my neck.

My heart started racing. I exhaled shakily.

"You're safe," he whispered.

I knew I was – I knew he wouldn't do anything before he absolutely had to – but the idea of it still sent a thrill of fear through me.

My body's reactions, contradictory as they were, betrayed me. I trembled as I offered myself to him. I could feel him smiling against my skin.

He planted a gentle kiss above my pounding pulse. "Not tonight, my love. I must return you to Charlie as you were when you left him."

A pang of guilt hit me. In a year's time, I would be leaving my dad, just like my mom was now. He would be all alone. I might be able to keep in touch through letters and phone calls, but I probably wouldn't be able to see him anymore. He would know something was different. I wouldn't look the same. And I wouldn't be able to explain the what or why to him.

There was also the real possibility that I would be dangerous to him. My new vampire instincts will have kicked in. Jasper didn't want to attack me, but he almost did. If it wasn't for his wife and siblings, he would have.

Would I be able to resist the urge with my own father?

"After I've changed, I won't be able to see him anymore, will I?"

He held me tighter. Consolingly. That alone gave me my answer.

"No."

Yeah, I figured. That stung a little, but really, would it be so very different if I were to remain human? Charlie would be expecting me to leave eventually. College, a job, starting a life of my own… that was usually how things worked.

At least my parents would be able to see me get married first, before I disappeared on them forever.

"Are you having second thoughts?" He sounded hopeful.

I shook my head as I pushed out of his arms. "No. Just thinking."

"Will you share with me?"

That didn't seem like a good idea at all. He was already struggling with my decision. I didn't want to add to that.

I shook my head again, then grabbed for my suitcase. He immediately moved to help me.

His eyes never left me as I started packing up my crap.

Esme had washed my clothes again. All of them but the ones I was wearing. They were all neatly folded where the pile I created had been. I dropped them in the case, on top of my scattered headbands, and spread them out evenly.

My toiletry bag ended up on top of his stack of journals. I tossed that in next.

My camera, my copy of _Wuthering Heights_, my cell phone charger…

"Bella, please. This decision concerns me as well."

Ugh. He was right. I hated that he was, but…

An argument was coming, I could sense it.

"I'll miss my parents," I admitted. I didn't look at him when I said it. I couldn't. I just stared at my half-packed suitcase.

Once again, he surprised me.

"It might be possible for you to see them again, once you've learned to control your instincts."

Okay, but was that just lip service? I looked up at him, trying to determine if it was. There seemed to be a bit of wishful thinking mixed in, but there was also sincerity. It gave me hope.

"I guess, if not, we'll just add that to the cons list."

He scowled at me. I knew why. He didn't like it when I made light of things he found to be serious. And it's not that I didn't think the situation was, but joking about it lightened my tension.

I rolled my eyes and resumed packing.

The box my bracelet from Edward came in. The paper it was wrapped in. The key ring charm Alice made for me…

I bent down and attached that to one of the zipper pulls on my laptop bag.

When I stood up, Edward pulled me into his arms. He didn't seem to be offering comfort. He was seeking it.

We were in for a long year.

"Edward, relax. You're going to drive yourself insane."

Not a far drive, it seemed.

"I want to be accepting of your decision…"

He sounded like he was in hell again. Okay, so maybe he wouldn't even need to get into the car, let alone drive anywhere.

"In a year from now, you'll see that all this worry and pain is for nothing, okay? Relax. It'll all work out."

I was sure of that somehow. I just didn't know how to convince Edward of it.

He carried all my crap down the stairs for me, then waited by the door as I said goodbye to everyone. Rosalie stood at the back of the room. I wasn't expecting much in the way of a sendoff from her, anyway.

"This isn't goodbye," Alice said as she hugged me. "We'll be seeing each other lots! I have so many great ideas! We'll have a sleepover real soon, okay?"

I nodded, fighting back tears. Why in the hell did I have to be so emotional?

"You're welcome any time," Esme said, then she gathered me into a hug as well.

I believed her. It really felt like she considered me her daughter.

Even Jasper hugged me, though it was brief and he held his breath the entire time. But it was heartfelt. I could tell.

Emmett spun me around as he hugged me. I was going to need to invest in anti-nausea tablets if he kept doing that. The thought made me smirk.

"Eddie'll come around, little one. Don't worry. We'll work on him from this end."

I glanced at Edward over Emmett's shoulder as I nodded.

As soon as he set me back onto my feet, my eyes landed on Carlisle. Like before, his expression was serious but kind.

I barely blinked and there he was, right in front of me. And then he wrapped his arms around me.

"Thank you," he whispered.

That surprised me. I had no idea what he was thanking me for. I didn't feel like I could ask him, though, so I just muttered 'you're welcome' in response.

"Thank you for having me," I added.

For some reason, he chuckled at that.

"It was our pleasure, Bella."

I wasn't going to be able to hold back the tears for much longer. I could feel them pooling. I averted my eyes and darted out the door. Edward followed.

We were silent for most of the trip back to my house.

"Will you share your thoughts with me?"

I sighed, my gaze remaining out the passenger side window. "I'm going to miss your family. I know I'll see them again, but it really felt like I was _home_ there."

He said nothing as he offered me his hand. I took it, and that's when the tears broke loose. He tightened his hold but still said nothing.

The quaint house I had always considered my home came into view, and my stomach dropped a little. It didn't feel like I belonged there anymore.

My mom wouldn't be in there when I went inside. My dad wouldn't be glued to some sports game or cleaning his police-issue gun or hunting rifle. Nothing would be like it was two weeks ago.

Edward parked, cut the engine, and then exited the car. I waited for him to open my door. Anything to prolong going inside.

He helped me out, and then gathered me into his arms. I didn't want to leave the comfort of his embrace, ever. I felt safe there. I felt right.

"It won't be so very different, I promise."

I sighed as I pushed out of his arms, then I swiped at my tears. I nodded, though I didn't believe him. He had no idea just how different everything was. Everything was different. My house, my family, myself. My entire life, my entire outlook on it, had completely changed in the course of fourteen days.

He grabbed my stuff from the trunk and followed me up to the door. When I pushed it open, he set my belongings down just inside. I heard my dad get up from the couch, and then I heard his footsteps as he approached.

"Bells? Are you okay?"

I nodded without looking at him.

"Thanks, Edward," I whispered. I couldn't look at him, either. "I'll see you at school tomorrow."

Watching him walk away was one of the hardest things I'd ever had to do. It felt like I would never see him again, even though I knew I would.

When I bent down to grab my crap, my dad reached to help. I didn't argue. I just led the way to my room.

He didn't leave at first, after putting my suitcase down by my bed. We just stood there in awkward silence. Forty-eight seconds passed.

"Did she leave?" I asked. I saw him nod out of my peripheral vision. "Does she hate me?"

"No, but she thinks you hate her."

"I don't hate her." I sighed as I dropped down onto the corner of my bed. "I'm just…"

Angry? Sad? Lost? Frustrated? Confused? Irritated?

"I know," he said. Fifty-two seconds passed. "I'll let you get unpacked and settled back in. I'll… see'ya in the morning."

I shut and locked the door as soon as he left, then I threw myself onto my bed, face down. Seconds later, I felt someone climb in with me.

I almost shrieked. Startled, I bolted up into a sitting position, fists clenched, ready to attack.

But then Edward gently took both of my wrists, stopping me from striking him. In shock, I stared back at him for three years before launching into his arms.

"You're here," I whispered.

"I'm here," he whispered back. He pulled me tighter to him, consolingly. "I promised you it wouldn't be so very different."

"But, Charlie is—"

"I can hear his thoughts, Bella. I will know when he's coming to check on you."

Plus my door had a lock on it. Not that my dad would ever just barge in.

I kicked off my shoes as we settled in. I didn't even bother to change into my nightclothes. I just clung to Edward as I cried.

Everything had just come crashing down on me. Everything, all at once.

Waylon's death. The existence of vampires. Edward's love. My parents' divorce. My dad's sorrow. Leaving the Cullen house. My life changing decision. Edward's anxieties over that decision. Rosalie. Jake. Jessica. The look on my mom's face.

"What can I do?"

I only shook my head in answer. There was nothing he could do. It was just something I needed to work through. I needed to get it out of my system.

I eventually did, but for how long I had carried on like that I couldn't say. It seemed like hours. Maybe it was years.

He never stopped holding me. He nuzzled and stroked my hair. He told me he loved me countless times. When I finally pulled myself together, he wiped my tears away with the pad of his thumb. He kissed every inch of my face, leaving my lips for last.

He wasn't trying to excite me. He was comforting me.

It worked.

And then we just stared at each other, connecting in that profound way that made words unnecessary.

It was then that I realized…

We weren't like the lion and the lamb after all. We weren't like the starving man and the steak. Or the rose and the weed.

We weren't the epitome of Mother Nature's cruel sense of humor. Our love story wasn't even like Romeo and Juliet's.

We were Edward and Bella. Created to fit perfectly. Destined to be together. Drawn to each other by some design of fate.

Me, a human, with a flawed sense of self-preservation so that I could look beyond what Edward was potentially capable of.

Edward, a vampire, whose morality was such that he could fight off his most basic instincts and love me instead of kill me.

In what other universe could that be possible?

In no other universe, was the answer.

We were meant to be.

The contentedness washed over me. My eyelids grew heavy. I smiled.

"What are you thinking?"

I hummed in response. "Good thoughts," I murmured.

He hummed right back, and my eyelids grew heavier.

"You can sleep. I'll still be here when you wake up."

The last thing I saw before sleep enveloped me was Edward's angelic smile.

**To be continued…**

**Author's Note:**

The journey is almost at an end now. Just the epilogue chapter left to go. I'm excited to share, but sad at the same time. It feels a little like I'm saying goodbye to a group of friends I might not ever see again.

(wipes tear from eye)

Yeah. Anyway…

ADarnell: LOL! OMG, I nearly ruined my laptop spraying soda all over it! Try going on seven years, with no prospects in sight! Not to be too depressing, but with my disabilities and such, there isn't a single person on this planet who would want me. I've put myself out there a few times since butt-munch ex-hubby left me, but… yeah, they all just ran screaming in the opposite direction. I don't need a crowbar upside my head to get the point.

Megajonastwihard: I am literally the last person on this planet who should be giving out writing tips, LOL! I don't follow _the_ _rules_ as closely as I probably should. I just write what sounds good inside my head.

But, if I were to give any piece of advice, it would be this: Know your characters. Climb inside their heads and get a feel for them. How they think, depths of emotions, likely reactions to any given situation. Believable characters and dialog can make or break a story, in my humble opinion. The rest is just 'scenery'. If they're in a meadow, describe a meadow. If they're in an office building, describe an office building. Give enough, and the reader will imagine what they wish to. But if your characters lack depth, the reader will often times detach, and you don't want that. They won't care if Jack and Jill are traipsing up a hill to fetch a pail of water if they don't care enough about Jack and Jill in the first place. Give a back story, and some depth – give the reader a reason to care about Jack and Jill – and then when they traipse up the hill, it will matter. See what I mean?

Yeah, like I said, I am the last person on this planet who should be giving out writing tips.

Sorry for babbling on.

Please review! And MTLBYAKY


	35. Chapter 35

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Thirty-Five – Epilogue

By: Jana~

**XXX**

I tapped my pencil nervously against the notebook page – repeatedly, in rapid-fire succession – as Carlisle sat patiently behind his desk. As always, his expression was kind but serious.

"I flip-flop back and forth," I said, answering his previous question, "between being anxious for me and anxious for Edward. Him seeing me in that kind of pain… I'm afraid of what that will do to him emotionally."

He smiled, but just a little. It was almost imperceptible. "Your love for him warms me, Bella. Yes, seeing you in pain will be difficult for him…" He sighed. His slight smile dropped. "But he is stronger than he realizes. Stronger than I am, in so many ways. It was hard for me to watch Esme go through the change. I felt helpless. I hated myself for inflicting that upon her. But the memory of the pain, both physical and emotional, does fade in time."

I nodded, then entered one final note on the page.

The memory of this will fade.

After closing the book, I stared blankly at the cover. I wasn't ready for our last session to be over with yet.

The last year and half flew by so fast.

Initially, my plan was to have Edward change me after a year. But with graduation around the corner… And then the wedding… It just seemed logical to wait a little while longer.

Edward, of course, welcomed that. He was still struggling with my decision. Still hoping I would change my mind.

I wasn't going to. I was surer than ever. Unfortunately, I was also more frightened than ever.

The closer the date got, the more that became apparent. The thought would hit me randomly, and I would start shaking for what seemed like no discernible reason. In the middle of a conversation, I would zone out as I imagined the pain I would have to endure. I would picture Edward's face, contorted in agony as he watched me suffer, and I would start to cry.

Edward used all these to try and talk me out of it. Or he would beg me to wait a while longer, at least.

He dangled a thousand proverbial carrots over my head… College. Traveling the world. Having a baby by artificial insemination. Every human experience or luxury he could think of, he offered me. If I would just wait.

I didn't want to wait. I had chosen my life. I wanted to start living it.

And I didn't want to be another year older than Edward. My nineteenth birthday was rapidly approaching. Looming. Taunting me.

With high school behind me, and the only man I would ever love bound to me in holy matrimony, there was only one thing left to do to make my world complete. Have Edward change me.

"Are you concerned that he will lose control? That he won't be able to stop?"

Carlisle's questions brought me out of my reverie.

"I don't think he'd let it get that far. He has more self-control than he likes to give himself credit for." Carlisle laughed at that. I smirked, but it faded quickly when the seriousness of the situation came rushing back at me. "I'm afraid he'll chicken out."

"A contingency plan is in place, should he decide to. I know you wish for him to be the one who changes you, but if he feels he can't, I will step in."

My heart lurched a little. He smiled at me sympathetically.

In about twenty-four hours from that very moment, I would be in a cabin, in some remote area of Alaska, enduring the worst pain I had ever before experienced in my life. And that was saying something, after all the injuries I had sustained over the years.

I was shaking again.

"I'm sure you must be tired of hearing this, but you can change your mind at any time."

"I know I can. I'm not going to, though." I took in a shaky breath, trying to settle myself. It didn't help. "I'm not looking forward to the pain part of this, but that's the smaller picture. My focus is the bigger picture."

And it had been, since I had first realized that this was what I wanted. An eternity with Edward was worth the days of agony I would soon be facing. More than worth it.

"Are there any other questions you would like to ask me?"

There was, but I wasn't sure how to say it. Averting my eyes, I whispered, "And Jacob's tribe…? The treaty will be okay after this?"

"Yes. We have a… an understanding."

An understanding. Jake sure didn't seem to understand. He hated me. But there was no point in dwelling on it. Jacob was the one who drew the line, demanding I choose. Of course I chose Edward.

I gave a nod, then I pushed off the chair and headed for the door.

"Bella?" I stopped, but I didn't turn around. "We will do everything in our power to make your transition as easy on you as possible."

I knew that. "Thanks."

Edward was waiting for me on the bed when I got to our room. He pulled a strained smile onto his face when I entered, but I had just been able to catch the look of anguish before he did.

I didn't even hesitate in handing the notebook over to him. He had heard every word said during my meeting with Carlisle – he always did – but it had become a ritual for him to read through my notes afterwards.

As usual, it took him seconds only. He sighed as he closed it.

"I'm begging you, Bella. Please. Just give me one more year."

I fought back the tears that threatened to well and climbed into his lap.

"You won't feel any different in a year, Edward. I gave you six more months, and you're still… struggling."

That was an understatement. He was in the absolute fires of hell again. Still.

He had been in a near constant state of that recently. The only exception was on our wedding day, and during our honeymoon. And even then it showed itself a little. Briefly.

He was so sure he would hurt me. I knew he wouldn't, but there was no convincing him of that. It took me pleading with him to get him to try.

The only thing that ended up getting hurt was Esme's headboard, and a few pillows that were easy to replace. Luckily, her bedroom furniture didn't hold sentimental value to her. It was embarrassing explaining to her what had happened, though.

There was a little bruising on my upper arm after the first time we had made love, which he was livid with himself over, but then I showed him all the bruises I'd had that were in various stages of healing. Bruises I had given myself under far less pleasurable circumstances. His self-hatred eased after that.

"_You_ might feel differently in a year," he whispered. His tone was firm, but it wasn't enough to hide the anguish.

"I won't. Please, try to understand that."

"I _am_ trying."

He was. I knew he was. And there were moments when it seemed that he was finally coming to terms with my decision…

A few times, he laughed at jokes I had made about it. When I challenged Emmett to an arm wrestling match, to take place after I was changed, he smirked.

But those indicators of acceptance never lasted long. The pain would always settle back onto his face. His words would once again be laced with despair. It was heartwrenching.

"Alice's visions don't ease your mind even a little?" I asked.

She had told me about several, all of them depicting us as happy. Joyous. Carefree. I took comfort in them, even though I couldn't actually see them like she and Edward could.

"A little," he whispered. "The pleasant ones," he added. His pain intensified.

There were unpleasant ones? That was news to me. Alice had never said…

"What were the unpleasant ones about?"

He literally moaned in agony.

After knowing Edward Cullen for one year, six months, two weeks, and two days, after being married to him for three weeks and four days, I still didn't know when to keep my big mouth shut.

I shifted to straddle him and wrapped my arms tightly around his neck.

"I'm sorry, Edward. Please, just… stop thinking about it. Stop picturing it."

"What if I make a mistake?"

"You won't."

"What if I can't stop?"

"You will."

"I can't leave you. I can't stay with you and remain sane. I can't win!"

I knew he just meant during the time I was converting.

"The family will be there to help you through it. And I'll see you on the other side of it."

It seemed I had spent more time consoling him about my changing than he did me. I didn't mind. I knew how hard it was for him. I knew how much I was asking for. All I had to do was lie there and endure. His part in it would be far more difficult. He had to inflict it. Fight his instincts. Watch over someone he loved while she suffered through it.

"Bella, love, please, just one more year. If you value my sanity…"

I grabbed two fistfuls of his hair and pulled back, locking eyes with him.

"Edward, no," I said firmly, but with compassion. "I kept up my end of things. It's time."

He shifted his eyes away from me and sighed.

I had to do something to ease his pain. I put my own concerns and fears aside.

I kissed his lips quickly, then again but for longer. Just shy of passionately.

"It's our last night in Forks. Let's do something fun."

He cracked the tiniest hint of a smile. "What would you like to do, my love?"

He never could resist an opportunity to make me happy.

"Let's go flying through the trees or something," I suggested. "Enjoy the scenery and sunset."

His smile grew. But then it dropped a little as his eyes shifted again. Someone was talking to him.

"Carlisle wishes to speak with me for a moment," he said, helping me to stand. "Dress warmly. It's a cool evening."

Always protective. I rolled my eyes as I shooed him away.

It was a weird thought. Soon, jackets would be nothing more than a fashion statement.

He wasn't gone very long. I had barely selected the least cumbersome jacket I could find in the closet when he had returned. He looked very serious.

"Is something wrong?"

It didn't seem like there was, necessarily, but something was up. I could tell.

He shook his head, then smiled wistfully. "No, my love. Are you ready?"

I didn't buy it for a second, but I didn't call him on it. I just took his hand when he offered it to me, and then held on tight as he slung me up onto his back and launched out the window wall.

We didn't go far, but I was sure we were out of earshot. I had become accustomed to the rest of my new family being able to hear our every conversation when we were near them, but sometimes, one just wants to have a few private moments alone.

"This is perfect," I whispered. The view was spectacular from high in the tree I was sure we had been in before. Reminiscent of his music.

We were silent for a long time as we stared out at the river. Well, I stared at the river. His eyes never left me.

Over the previous eighteen months, time, while in Edward's presence, started to make a little more sense, but there were still occasions when it seemed distorted. It seemed to spend differently. I had become accustomed to that, too.

"I owe you an apology, my love."

I turned my attention away from the scenery and onto him. "You don't owe me anything, Edward."

"I do. I've been a neglectful husband and mate. This is a difficult time for you, and when you needed me most, my selfishness prevented you from seeking comfort. I'm so sorry."

I looked away. I had to. The intensity of his eyes was too much for me to bear.

"It's a difficult time for you, too. I'm sorry I'm the cause of it."

"You're not the cause of it. My torment is self-inflicted. Will you share your thoughts with me? Anything you wish to discuss."

Had Carlisle said something to him?

"Anything?" I asked skeptically.

"Anything."

"You won't freak out?"

"No."

I'll admit it, I was scared. Not of him, but of upsetting him. In the year and a half since I'd made my decision, we had never openly discussed the day he would change me. He told me of his experiences – his whole family did, one at a time; Rosalie's and Jasper's stories were the hardest to hear – but the details of how things might be for me were always carefully sidestepped.

I had an idea for how I wanted things to go, but I was never brave enough to share them with him. With anyone. I was already asking enough of him. Too much of him.

My… well, fantasies, I guess, were unimportant.

My heart picked up pace. When I started to shake, he held me tighter in response.

"You promise?" I asked. Really, I was stalling. He probably knew I was.

"Yes, my love. I promise."

I would get to the scary part later, after I gauged his reactions to a few simpler things first.

"Are you going to… chicken out?"

"No. I will hope until the last moment for you to change your mind, but I will not break my promise to you."

"Is part of the reason why you're… upset… Is it because you'll miss me being human? I mean, I won't be warm anymore. I won't smell the same."

"My love…" His hand raked into my hair. His eyes and expression shone with compassion. "You will always be my Bella. Just… less fragile."

He smiled a little when I smirked.

I knew the logistics of what to expect. I knew that in the first few months, at least, I would be a wild, crazed newborn. Insane with thirst. Carlisle and the others explained all of that to me. But what I didn't know was how Edward, specifically, felt about that.

"I'll be a little hard to love in the beginning…"

"That part doesn't last forever. My love for you will, though."

Okay, three things…

First, his words really affected me. Even after all our time together, he could still make me melt by the simplest of statements.

Second, he seemed so composed. Calm. At peace. Carlisle must have said something to him.

And third, I hadn't realized until just then how much I needed him to be okay with this. How much I needed his love, and support, and comfort.

I knew I wanted him to be okay with my decision, because I didn't want him to be hurting anymore. But I had spent so much time hiding my fears so that I could help him through his pain, that I had deluded myself into thinking I was braver than I actually was. I needed to be able to fall apart, and cry, and I needed him to hold me while I did that.

I pushed my forehead against his shoulder and let out a shaky sigh. The tears threatened to explode again, but habit made me force them not to well.

"I know, my love. I know you're scared."

That did it. I was instantly a quivering mess in his arms.

"Sshh. I'm here. I will always be here. I promise you, I will never fail you again. I'm so sorry."

I barely heard his whispered words over the sound of my own sobbing.

Well, I wasn't exactly sobbing, but it was still a pretty pathetic display of emotions.

"Did… Carlisle… talk… to you?" Every bit of that sentence choked out in tearful gasps.

Yeah, like I said. Pathetic.

"Yes."

"Don't… take this… to mean… that I've changed… my mind."

He sighed softly. "I know. I won't be trying to talk you out of this any longer. My doing so has only added to your stress. I'm so sorry."

I wanted to tell him to stop apologizing, but I knew it would come out pathetically. I was a wreck.

But, apparently, I needed to be one. I had been putting on a brave face for everyone, not just Edward, since the beginning. It had finally caught up with me. Having that mini breakdown helped me to feel a little better.

Once I was finally able to pull myself back together, after the sun had set, we relocated to ground level. He cradled me in his arms, me in his lap, as he settled himself against the tree we had just been up in.

Struggling with how to broach the subject, I fell silent as I pondered my options. He seemed to be doing so much better, so him falling apart wasn't my immediate concern. Mostly, I was afraid I would seem like an idiot. Or foolish.

He knew that. Or, at least, he knew I was struggling with something. We knew each other _so well_. We knew each other in the Biblical sense, but really, we knew each other even better than that.

"You can share with me, Bella. Whenever you're ready."

I took in a breath to steady my nerves. It didn't help, but I pushed onward anyway.

"I was just wondering how things will… go. I mean, I know the logistics," I added quickly, "but we've never really talked about how we… you… are going to… do it."

I sounded like a spaz. He tightened his arms around me.

"However you wish me to."

"I… I had some thoughts on that."

"I'm listening."

My adrenalin spiked. My breathing turned erratic again.

God. Why was this so hard?

"I… I don't want it to be some cold, clinical, medical-type… thing. I want to feel… loved."

"I might find it difficult to please you, under the circumstances."

Oh. No. He misunderstood.

"I don't mean that, Edward. I doubt I'll be much in the mood for that. I just meant… you know… hold me. Make me feel safe. I just want to feel… connected to you."

"Yes."

That was all he said. He was agreeing to my request, but I could tell he was struggling with the subject. His tone held sadness in it.

"We don't have to talk about it anymore, if you don't want to."

"I want to know your mind, Bella. Please, continue."

He was trying so hard. But how far was safe to push him?

"I don't want to upset you."

He sighed. "Please, Bella, continue."

I tried to choose my words carefully, but, really, there was just no easy way to say it.

"When the time comes, I might… have a moment of panic. It's human nature to want to avoid… pain. Promise me you won't stop. Even if I beg you to."

I felt him take in a shaky breath.

"I'll only regret it later," I added quickly. "Twelve minutes later, I'll be annoyed with myself and I'll ask you to do it again. It'll just be a vicious cycle."

His body was tense. He didn't respond.

"I know how much I'm asking of you, and I'm really sorry that I am, but I've given this a lot of thought, and I know how I'm likely to react. I want this Edward, and a moment of panic won't change that. It'll just frustrate us both, and prolong the inevitable."

His hold on me became almost desperate.

"I will honor your request."

I dropped the subject after that. But after that, no subjects seemed approachable. We just sat in silence until we returned to the house an hour later.

I didn't leave the bedroom at all for the rest of the night. Well, I showered, but it was a quick one. I even ate dinner in the room. It felt a little like I was being served my last meal. In a way, I kind of was, though I knew I would end up grabbing a quick bite of something in the morning, before we headed off to the airport.

Edward made my last official night as a human special. He held me, and kissed me, and made love to me with gentle, consoling adoration. He continued to hold me as I rode out various waves of emotional reactions. I shook. I cried – not the near sobbing I had done before; it was more like a leaking of tears. I admonished myself with muttered curse words.

He held me through all of it.

And then, finally, exhaustion took its toll.

I functioned on autopilot throughout the next morning.

I ate a little of the breakfast Esme made for me, but my stomach just didn't want me to put food into it.

Edward helped me pack. I just nodded or shook my head at each item when he asked me if I wanted to bring it.

I only acknowledged who I had to when they spoke to me directly.

Edward hovered over me incessantly.

I called Charlie one last time before we left. He asked me twice if I was okay, but I dismissed my odd tone as anxiousness about flying. He laughed and suggested I invest in Valium, since I would be plane hopping a lot over the next year.

The story we told him and Mom was that Edward and I were going to take a year off from school, and wait to start college, so that we could travel the world and sightsee.

I already had twenty-four letters written to both of them, on multiple different types of stationary, penned in a few different types of ink. They all had postmarks on them from different countries. I didn't bother to ask how Carlisle had pulled that off.

I figured I had better do the correspondence in advance. I doubted, as a crazed newborn vampire, I would care much about keeping in touch with my parents. I could imagine the letters I would write…

Thirsty! _Thirsty_! _THIRSTY_!

Yeah, not such a good idea.

The shuttle got lost trying to find the house, so we were a little late getting to the airport, but we were still there in plenty of time to deal with the rigmarole and security procedures.

It seemed like everyone was staring at us. Not surprising, really. I was sure I looked lost and confused, and Edward looked like he had just seen his best friend murdered right before his eyes. The rest of the Cullens were able to pull pleasant expressions onto their faces, though. Well, Rosalie looked annoyed.

I don't remember the flight at all. I don't even remember getting on the plane. The next I was aware, I was being encouraged to step into thick, bulky snow pants.

"Why?" I asked. That was it. Just that one word question. I wasn't capable of anything beyond that.

"It's very cold here," Edward answered. "And with the wind chill factor…"

As soon as we were past the small population of the city, we were running to the cabin that was located in a remote area just north of Denali.

I didn't really remember the run, either. I just remember my face hurting from the cold. I hid against Edward's shoulder to minimize the discomfort.

We got there first. Edward was faster than the rest, even with me on his back.

The cabin was warmer, but not by much. And it wasn't exactly a cabin, in the strictest sense of the word. It was huge, and had at least five bedrooms.

Our room was the largest. The bed was beautiful. I couldn't find it in me to care.

I stripped out of my protective gear, handed it over to Edward, then plopped down on the beautiful bed and glanced around the room.

"This is your day, my love. We'll spend it any way you wish."

I started to shake again, and not because of the chill in the air.

He sat next to me and pulled me to his side.

"I don't know," I whispered. "A part of me wants to get it over with. A part of me wants to wait. But I know that's the chicken in me."

"I will honor your wishes. Whenever you're ready, but we should wait for our family to arrive first."

It felt like a stay of execution, though I knew it wouldn't be a long one. They were slower than Edward, but not that slow.

I gave a nod, then climbed into his lap.

Minutes later, we were no longer alone. Edward helped me up so that we could go greet them.

I stared at the ground. Beautiful carpet. Plush, and a sort of forest green color.

"How are you feeling, Bella?"

I only glanced at Carlisle. "Okay," I whispered.

Emmett laughed. "You look scared to death!"

I rolled my eyes at him. "Shut up, Em. You were unconscious at the time."

Alice danced over to me and wrapped me into a hug. "Bigger picture, Bella," she whispered encouragingly.

I nodded against her.

"Edward?"

I felt Edward nod in response to Carlisle's questioning of his name. He was probably answering to his thoughts.

"Bella? Is there anything you would like to do, to maybe take your mind off of it for a while?"

"I think– Nothing is going to take my mind off it. I know it's coming. I think the waiting will just make it harder."

A few moments later, I heard Alice squeak. I looked up at the sound. Her smile was beaming. I knew why.

"It's all going to be okay?" I asked her.

She nodded emphatically. Edward planted a soft kiss on the top of my head.

"Okay…" I turned in Edward's arms and faced the bedroom door. "Let's get this over with." I was trying to sound brave. Sure. I didn't.

I was shaking before we even entered the room. It escalated as I sat on the edge of the bed and pulled off my snow boots. I was literally vibrating as I pushed to the center of the bed.

Edward climbed in with me, then immediately gathered me into his arms.

I couldn't stop trembling. I couldn't will myself to. I couldn't relax. I was surprised the whole house wasn't shaking with the force of it.

My arms were pinned to my sides, my hands balled into tight fists. His left leg was draped across both of mine in an attempt to steady me.

Oh, God. This was really about to happen.

I couldn't breathe. I inhaled and exhaled in short gasps.

He kissed my cheek. My temple. My ear. I wondered if he was as calm as he seemed.

"I'm scared. I'm _so scared_."

"I know, my love. It will all be over soon."

He planted a gentle kiss on my neck. I stopped breathing. My shaking intensified. I was convulsing.

But even with as terrified as I was, I offered myself to him.

He brushed his lips across my skin. He nuzzled. He licked. He was doing exactly what I had asked of him. But I suddenly didn't want it anymore. I just wanted to get it over with. The agonizing anticipation was threatening to kill me.

I needed it to stop. I needed _him_ to stop.

I needed. The intensity. To stop!

No. I had to see it through. He wouldn't have stopped anyway, even if I had asked him to. I told him not to. I had foreseen this reaction.

"I love you, Bella. Please don't hate me."

And then I felt his teeth on my skin. I gasped, and as I did, I felt them pierce through my flesh.

I startled, hard, but it was only from the shock of it. It took a couple seconds for the pain to register. I had barely opened my mouth to scream when the venom began to burn.

That scream choked off, but the one that followed didn't. It wasn't even a scream. It wasn't a shriek. There was no word for what it was.

I fought against his hold, but he was too strong.

I felt him licking at the wound, like he was trying to soothe it. It didn't.

Then I felt a sharp pain on my right wrist. I screamed again as I tried to pull it free from his firm grasp. The attempt was futile.

He licked that wound as well, and then I felt the pain on my left wrist.

"No!"

I knew it was me who had yelled, but my voice wasn't mine at all. It sounded like it belonged to some mortally wounded wild animal.

I began to writhe. The noises escaping me were far from human.

I _burned_. They all had said it would burn.

They lied.

This wasn't just burning. This was more than just the fires of hell. Hell had a lower level, run by Satan's eviler cousin.

The cousin sneered at me as I stood before him, overjoyed by my pain.

"I love you, Bella. Please forgive me."

Natas – that was the name I gave to Satan's eviler cousin – laughed. He was mocking Edward, belittling his love for me.

I don't know how I found the will. I don't know where the courage had come from. I let the pain engulf me, and then I just stood indignantly and glared back at my tormenter.

His sneer dropped to a smirk.

Hours went by. Days, weeks, months, years, decades. I don't know. I never moved. I never tired. I just stood there.

I wasn't about to give Natas the satisfaction of seeing my agony.

"I made a mistake. She is so still."

"You didn't. Every conversion is different."

My eyes shifted off of Natas for the flash of a second, and in that blink of time, he advanced on me one step.

My glare grew harder. My stance more indignant. He sneered back at me.

"Bella? Can you say something? Move something?"

I didn't dare. Natas was waiting for me to. I had no idea what would happen if he closed the gap between us. Death? Worse than death? I was already suffering through a fate worse than death. I didn't dare chance what might come next.

"Love, can you squeeze my hand?"

Natas was positively giddy with evil glee. I didn't even flinch.

Four distinct footsteps entered the room.

"It's almost time!"

It was? Time for what? My body to explode? It felt like it was on the verge of it. My death? I would have welcomed it, except for one thing…

"It's almost over now, love."

Edward.

Natas laughed at me.

He would _not_ win. He would _not_ take me from Edward.

Wait. Something was different. My fingers…

They felt… cold. Different. Free of pain.

Reflexively, I wiggled them.

Natas advanced another step.

A warm hand squeezed mine.

My toes. Different. I didn't dare move them.

Was this it? The end of whatever, the beginning of the unknown?

My heart started racing. The fire burned hotter. My will was breaking. My courage slipping.

My arms. My legs. Different. The flames relocated to my chest.

My heart was seconds away from exploding, I was sure of it.

Natas grinned viciously.

This was what he had been waiting for. This moment. My death.

I screamed. Natas pounced.

And then there was nothing. Nothing.

Was I dead? I didn't feel dead, but I didn't feel alive, either.

Was this hell? Where were the flames?

Heaven?

"Bella? Love?"

Heaven. Edward, my angel, was singing my name.

But why was he in Heaven and not back on earth?

"Can you open your eyes, love?"

Could I? I wasn't sure.

"Just give her a moment."

Carlisle? It sounded like him, but his voice was so… musical.

"She's perfect, just like I said she would be."

Alice? Her voice sounded like wind chimes. What was wrong with my hearing?

Apparently, nothing. I could hear everything. _Everything_.

I could hear eight distinct patterns of breathing. One of them was mine. One wasn't in the room.

I could hear snow thawing and freezing. I could hear the flakes as they hit the cover on the ground.

"She has always been perfect."

"Relax, Edward. I wasn't insulting her former beauty."

"Bor-ring! Let's get to the fun stuff!"

"Patience, Emmett. She will be disoriented at first."

Disoriented. Good word for it, and yet not quite enough to describe what I was actually feeling.

A soft, warm touch to my cheek.

"Take your time, my love. Whenever you're ready."

Who was touching me?

My eyes flew open.

Edward?

He was… _beautiful_! He had always been beautiful. But this was…

And then he smiled at me.

I practically lunged at him. Actually, I guess that was exactly what I had done. I knocked him off balance as I wrapped my arms around his neck.

"Easy, love. You're a bit stronger than I am right now."

I relaxed my hold as I climbed into his lap. Emmett laughed.

"Shut up, Em…"

Wait. What the hell? Startled, I pushed out of Edward's arms, away from him. I almost shoved him off the bed with the force of it. Emmett laughed again.

Edward's smile showed sympathy and understanding. Exactly those emotions.

"What's wrong… with… my voice?" The sentence came out broken as I paused to hear myself speak.

His smile grew as he reached for me. "Absolutely nothing is wrong with your voice."

Nothing else mattered. Edward – _my_ Edward – was _reaching_ for me! The need was so strong it was almost all-consuming. Yet my mind seemed so vast that it wasn't.

I couldn't make sense of it, and I didn't bother trying to. I just launched back into his arms.

He was ready for me that time. He barely budged.

I couldn't touch him enough. He felt so… different. Warm. Soft. _Breakable_.

"Let's give them some privacy. There will be time later for questions."

"Yeah, right. We won't see them again for a decade!"

"She's so controlled! It doesn't make sense!"

"Since when has Bella ever made sense?"

All their voices faded as they left the room, but I could hear them as clearly as if they were still feet away.

I tuned them out as I focused on Edward. My husband. My mate.

He was holding me _so_ tight.

"Am I really that much of an enigma?"

God, my voice sounded weird. Like I was singing every word I said.

He laughed. Angelic choirs couldn't compare. "Dearest Bella, there is not a way in which you are not unique. Jasper is in awe of you. Newborns are always insane with thirst from the moment they open their eyes."

I had felt the relentless burning in my throat, but until he mentioned it, it was easy to ignore. After the agony I had just endured, the pain was an annoying yet welcomed discomfort.

But with it being brought to the forefront of the great chasm that was my mind, it was starting to become more noticeable. Bordering on unbearable.

"I don't feel insane… yet. But I _am_ thirsty."

"Of course you are, my love. We should tend to that first."

First? What was second? Or even third?

And then a weird form of nervousness spread throughout me. I recognized it as nerves, but it felt different from anything I had ever experienced before as a human.

"I don't know what to do. Will you show me?"

"It's instinctual, my love, but I will demonstrate for you if need be."

Demonstrate. I would get to see Edward hunt.

He had never allowed me the slightest glimpse into that part of his world. But now that I was like him… Now that this was my world, too…

Excitement joined the nerves.

I climbed off his lap, then reflexively reached for my snow boots that were sitting on the floor by the bed. Before I could slip the first one on, Edward wrapped his soft, warm fingers around my wrist.

"You won't need them. Trust me."

He urged me to my feet, then rewarded my smile with one of his own.

Foot attire would also be just a mere fashion accessory. I didn't even glance at my jacket as we walked out into the living room hand in hand.

"I'm taking Bella hunting now," Edward informed the family.

Everyone had wide smiles. Rosalie seemed less annoyed than I had ever seen her.

"Oh, man!" Emmett exclaimed. "I _so_ want to go!"

"No." Edward said. Growled, really, but it was a low, soft one. "And if you value your existence, I don't suggest you follow us. Bella is self-conscious enough as it is. She does not need an audience."

Emmett pouted for a moment, then his mischievous grin erased it. "Then I get to be there when she hunts polars for the first time!"

Edward rolled his eyes and headed for the door. I followed, of course.

We were outside and exactly six feet and seven inches away when I heard Emmett gripe, "I think that's a fair deal!"

"Ignore him," Edward whispered to me. Laughter from inside the house.

I did as he suggested and focused on him alone. "Where are we going?"

He smirked in amusement. "Hunting."

Duh. I rolled my eyes, then dropped them down to my feet so that I wouldn't face-plant due to the one inch deep snow and uneven terrain.

But there was no need to. The gracefulness of each step I took mesmerized me. Edward tightened his grip on my hand. I heard a soft chuckle; something my human ears would have never been able to pick up. I had to wonder how many times he had done that in the past.

The other thing I noticed as we walked – strolled, really – was that the snow on my bare feet wasn't cold. Well, it registered as cold, but it wasn't at all painful as it should have been, were I human.

If I were human still, I would have lost a toe to frostbite within seconds. Probably. How long does it usually take to lose an appendage to the freezing elements of Alaska?

"What are you thinking?"

I laughed, but stopped abruptly. God, would I ever get used to the sound of my own voice?

"I should be freezing, but I'm not," I answered him, then asked curiously, "You still can't read my mind?"

"I was hoping I might be able to, but no."

"So, there _is_ something wrong with me," I muttered. Even muttering sounded musical.

He halted, turning me to face him. Determination and love shone through as his eyes fixed onto mine. And a little bit of annoyance. His emotions were so clear to me now.

"There is nothing wrong with you, Bella. You are unique, and amazing, and I love you more and more each day."

Passion. Adoration. A sincere desire that I believe him. Could he read me that easily?

I nodded, mesmerized, and then his hand was cupping my face.

There was no racing of my heart. No adrenalin rush. No erratic breathing, though I did take in a shuddery breath out of habit.

None of the things I had ever felt before in reaction to his touch happened. But Drug Edward still coursed through me. It just took on a new form.

I felt like I was being electrocuted. That sounds horrible, I know, but imagine you _like_ being electrocuted. Imagine it as the best feeling in the world. Then multiply that by a billion.

Yeah.

My eyes drifted closed as I leaned into his touch.

The vastness of my mind narrowed in on him, and only him. It was like taking a giant picture and then zooming in on one pixel. The brightest, sharpest, clearest pixel in the whole wide universe.

"Soon, my love. First, we must slake your thirst."

He knew. I would have blushed, were I able to.

My eyes fluttered open reluctantly when I felt his hand leave me, and then his grasped mine and we were strolling again.

The further we got from the cabin, the quieter the conversation about me that our family was having became. And then Edward stopped.

"Are you ready to try running? Or if you prefer, I will carry you."

Running. I would be able to _run_.

Nerves struck again.

"I won't be as fast as you."

Another amused smile. "Few are. I will keep pace with you."

With the hand not holding mine, he pointed in the direction he wanted me to go.

I gave the simple task – a task that had never been simple to me in the past – brief consideration, and then I just… took off.

I was _flying_. But the sensation was different from what I remembered. There was no blur of color and scenery. It was all as clear as if I was just standing there staring at it. Every minuscule detail of every shape and texture.

Grinning, I pushed myself faster.

"Love?"

I felt a gentle tug on my hand. Three long bounds and I was able to slow myself to a stop.

"I will take you to Canada some day, I promise. For now, let's stay in the country."

Still grinning, I rolled my eyes. "Ha, ha. Now what?"

"Now, we hunt." He stepped around to behind me and placed his hands on my shoulders. "Focus. You should be able to smell them now."

I sniffed the air. My entire body tensed. My mouth watered and my throat burned.

He leaned in, his lips an inch from my ear. "What are your instincts telling you?" I tensed further. "Do it."

As soon as he released my shoulders, I bolted.

The closer I got, the stronger the need.

Thirsty! _Thirsty_! _THIRSTY_!

I could hear Edward following – I could sense him, too – but I didn't care. My mind was of one thought.

Moose! Two of them! Edward could have the big one. I had made my selection before they even realized danger was upon them. They started to scatter, but only a second and a half before I pounced.

I'd always felt like the hunting aspect of this existence would be difficult for me. I'd been a vegetarian, in the human sense of the word, for most of my life. By age eight, I would just push whatever meat my parents served me around on my plate. By age nine, I told them to stop serving me anything that once had a face.

I had accepted that it would have to be different after I was changed, but the prospect still wasn't very appealing to me. You wouldn't have known it by watching me now.

To honor Edward's wishes, none of the Cullens shared with me much about it. They said when the time came, I would know what to do.

They were right.

I pushed the lifeless, once majestic creature off of me, then stood and stared back at Edward. He had finished before me and was just watching as I made a mess of myself.

He, of course, looked as pristine as when we had first left the house.

I glanced down at myself, then allowed my eyes to remain on my feet. "I probably should have waited for you to demonstrate."

He shook his head, a smile on his face as he approached. "Always so self-conscious." When he wrapped his arms around me, I melted against him. "That was perfect. It takes years of practice to walk away without a little disarray."

"A little," I scoffed. "Edward, I'm a mess."

He chuckled with amusement. "You are the most beautiful mess I have ever laid eyes on." Reaching down between us, he laced his fingers with mine. "Come take a walk with me."

I didn't want to leave his embrace, but I followed obediently anyway.

He led me away from the small clearing, back the way we had come from, to an area populated by a sparse amount of trees. Then he brought me back into his arms.

"If you could just see yourself as I do," he whispered.

The simple placement of his hand – the pressure of his fingers on the small of my back – sent another shock of Drug Edward through me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and reached for his lips with my own.

His were so soft. So warm. So different, but still absolutely Edward.

I slid my hands up into his hair and fisted all I could grab. He winced.

"Easy, love."

Right. I was _strong_ now. That was going to take some getting used to.

I released my grip and ran my fingers through the strands soothingly.

Slow, gentle kisses became a little more passionate.

"I have some habits to unlearn," he whispered against my lips. "You are no longer breakable."

I smirked in response, but I had barely done so when I felt myself being scooped up into his arms. With grace and ease, we ended up on the ground.

"I want to please you, my love, but I can wait until you're ready. Only when you're ready."

"I'm ready, but I'm… well, nervous, I guess. Nervousness feels different to me now."

He brushed the back of his fingers across my cheek, carefully, like I was still his fragile little human.

"Why are you nervous?"

"I'm not the same anymore. I mean, I am, but I'm not. I guess I just… don't know what to expect."

The fingers that had been caressing my cheek raked into my hair. "You can expect to be pleased. It's my job to please you."

I smirked up at him. He had said that to me before, but in reference to him being my great protector. Apparently, he had self-assigned himself a new duty. "Your full time occupation and labor of love?"

He smiled in return, his eyes crinkling with amusement. "For all eternity. I don't know what I did to earn this fortune."

"_I'm_ the one who's fortunate. I feel like I'm in a fairytale."

He laughed at that. "Am I your prince, Bella?"

He was a little bit teasing. He had no idea.

"That surprises you? All you need now is a white steed and a knight in shining armor costume."

I grinned when he laughed again, harder than before.

"You think I'm joking," I whispered, my wide smile dropping. "I'm dead serious. Or, I guess, undead serious."

He rolled his eyes, then pulled me tighter against him. "You have a morbid sense of humor."

"At least I have a sense of humor! Lighten up. It's over now."

He sighed. That heavy kind of exhale that indicated he was gaining seriousness. I braced myself for what I knew was coming.

"Will you share with me? You were _so_ still."

Yeah.

"Can you hear it and not freak out? If I hit you now, it'll mean something," I threatened teasingly. He sighed again. He wasn't in the mood for my jokes. I sighed then, too. "You might think it's weird."

"Why would I think that?"

Maybe there _was_ something wrong with me. None of the others, when sharing their experiences with me, said they went through anything even remotely similar to what I had.

"I… I think I might have been hallucinating or something. Satan's eviler cousin was mocking you."

He shifted a little, then stared at me with concerned curiosity.

Yeah, he thought it was weird, but I told him anyway. All of it. Every detail. I downplayed the pain part of it, though. I wasn't about to subject him to any more anguish than he had already been through.

He knew, of course, but didn't press me to share more than I was comfortable with. He probably wasn't ready to hear it anyway. Maybe in time…

"Hmmm."

His hum could still reduce me to a liquefied mess. Which was really saying something, since I was essentially made of something more closely resembling rock.

"Carlisle will be very interested in hearing this."

I nodded, then we both relaxed into each other's arms.

"Later," I whispered. "I want more alone time with you first."

"Hmm. How would you like to spend it, my love?"

Nerves again. Why was I so nervous? I'd been with Edward dozens of times. Before we were married, we never advanced things beyond a certain level of semi-propriety, but after we were married…

And then his lips were on my neck. Oh, God, that was a _good_ feeling. You wouldn't think it would be. After the trauma I had endured, you would think I would have shied away from that kind of affection.

But, no. Instead, I offered myself to him.

I gasped in a breath and held it. My head didn't spin. My lungs didn't hurt. My body was completely indifferent to the lack of oxygen.

Edward smiled against me.

"Breathe, Bella. The sense of smell and taste will enhance the experience."

As soon as I did, I understood what he meant. When I was still human, his scent was recognizable to me – like he exuded a perfume that was made for me and me alone – but this was different. Stronger. Defined. Multifaceted. Every layer was unique but complimentary, and each had its own distinctive taste.

I had noticed this upon first opening my eyes, but, somehow, it seemed more powerful as my body reacted to his touch.

I once thought that a heightened sense of taste would be meaningless to someone who had no variety in their liquid diet. I could not have been more wrong. And I had severely underestimated the heightened sense of touch.

Each caress was gentle. Careful. Like he was attempting to help me past my foreign attack of anxiety, easing me into what was to come. But even with his delicate approach, it felt like there was an electrical storm raging within me. Nothing we had ever done while I was still human compared to the intensity, and he was only _touching_ me.

I didn't know whether to cry, or scream, or run, or…

God! My mind couldn't catch up to it! And he was _only touching me_! It was like how he used to please me before we were married, when certain lines of morality were still in place.

"Shh, love, your senses are heightened. It will be a little unnerving at first."

Unnerving? Hearing Emmett and Rosalie go at it like wild animals was unnerving. This was…

"Do you wish for me to stop?"

Yes! No! Shit!

Apparently, vampires _can_ lose their minds. I was on the brink of it.

I was being pulled. Pushed. Drawn in and swallowed whole.

And then it hit me. There wasn't even time to respond to him. I nearly launched off the ground as the most amazing sensation swept over me. The electricity inside me crackled and arced. The building pressure released and drifted. Reeling, I collapsed on the snow dusted earth, still within Edward's half-embrace.

"I'm sorry for overwhelming you, my love."

Always my great protector. A small smile inched onto my face, and then I busted up laughing. "Tell me you didn't just apologize," I teased. When I opened my eyes, I found him grinning down at me.

But then my laughter ceased and my smile dropped. I felt my pants' button give way and my zipper break. His grin remained. Something inside of me snapped.

I near about shredded his clothes off of him as I pulled him on top of me. He continued to hold me gently as I grabbed at him desperately.

It felt as if I had lost all sense of self-control. I growled. I wrapped my arms around his neck. I wrapped my legs around his waist. The need was too strong. Rational thought was impossible.

"Easy, love," he whispered against my lips.

An ounce of sanity wedged in. I relaxed my limbs and stared up at him in horror, but he just smiled as he shook his head. Then he kissed me, softly, for just a few moments. My head cleared a little more.

"You're doing so well, Bella. Don't be discouraged. You can do this. Focus. Think about your movements. Think about the force behind them. It's harder to do when excited, I know."

"This is why… When I was still human…"

I had a newfound appreciation for the difficulties he had faced. How easy it would have been for him to just… let go. He truly could have killed me.

"Yes. It can be difficult for the most disciplined vampires. Emmett and Rosalie often leave destruction in their wake."

"Then maybe we should wait. I don't feel very in control. I don't want to hurt you."

His smile returned. "You won't. Bella, your control rivals those who are decades old. At this stage, all you should care about is feeding. You should not be able to have rational conversations with me. Being with me should be the last thing on your mind. Not wanting to hurt me should be the least of your concerns. Simple verbal cues should not be affective. You break all the rules, Bella. You confound me."

His eyes stayed locked on mine. Searching. Requesting. I could _feel_ him. He was warm, and soft, and _right there_, waiting for permission.

Focusing, I tightened my legs around him carefully and pushed. Just a little. He caught on. His smile changed, his eyes began to smolder, and then he dropped his body onto mine.

He was all around me. Holding me. Kissing me. Inside me. Completing me. There were no words to describe it. No analogy I could give. You would have to be a vampire to understand. I was one, though a new one, and even I could barely understand it.

I didn't think it could get better than what we had shared since our wedding night. It was perfect before. Loving, passionate, intense, gentle… But this…

I met his every movement. I clung to him. I offered myself to him when he nuzzled my neck.

When his teeth sunk into my flesh, I arched my back and growled his name. It tingled pleasantly, sending shockwaves throughout my entire body. It was raw, animalistic, yet he still managed to convey his adoration for me.

And then he offered himself to me. I didn't even pause for a fraction of a second.

His smell. His taste. My absolute love and need for him… My control started slipping.

Startled, I pushed back and stared at him with wide eyes. He smiled in return.

"I trust you, my love. Just be very gentle."

The irony wasn't lost on me. We had spent the whole of our relationship with him needing to always be careful. Always worried about his control.

Now, the tables were turned. This side of the table sucked.

He flipped us so that I was in his lap, straddling him. He had one hand behind him, supporting himself, while the other was up in my hair. Then he urged me to continue.

His thrusts were slight as I licked and nipped, but when I settled my teeth against his skin, the slow, languid pace he had set picked up. He was almost frantic.

"Bella, please…"

The whispered plea didn't hide the need in his tone. I shuddered, then, forcing myself not to become lost to the action, I bit into his flesh.

It wasn't hard like marble. It was soft. Yielding. Damageable.

His growl scared me. I wasn't sure if it was from pain or pleasure. There was no way I would have been able to live with myself if I had hurt him.

I removed my teeth from his skin and pulled back. The look on his face gave me my answer.

He wrapped both arms around me and collapsed his upper body to the ground, taking me with him. Smiling, I laid my head against his chest.

"Did I please you?" I asked.

His laughter brought a full-blown grin to explode across my face.

"In every way possible, my love. My wife. My dearest Bella."

I kissed his chest, then sat up and rolled my hips. Catching on, with a grin that matched mine, he joined me.

We carried on for well over an hour. We never tired. I don't believe we ever would have. That's one of the great things about being a vampire. Super stamina.

Eventually, we reluctantly pried ourselves apart and got dressed.

"Hmmm…"

I looked up from the destroyed button on my pants to see Edward surveying me thoughtfully.

"Um, yeah," I muttered. "Button's kinda useless now. Zipper's not much better."

"Love, those are the least of your concerns." He gave a nod towards my shirt.

I knew it was ripped – I realized that when I was putting it on – but _where_ it was ripped…

"Crap. I think your family's about to see more of me than I ever intended."

"I don't think so." I could hear and see the jealousy in his tone and expression. "My wife will not be ogled."

The slight possessiveness he exhibited was oddly satisfying. I liked it. I liked being _his_.

I grinned back at him. "We plan to prevent this, how? I didn't bring a change of clothes with me."

I could see the smirk pulling at the edges of his mouth. Then he whipped off his shirt and held it out for me to slip into. I rolled my eyes as I did so.

"I guess your family can ogle my husband all they want," I muttered teasingly.

"A shirtless man does not incite the same reactions."

"It does in women. And in gay men," I added.

It was a real struggle not to laugh when he rolled his eyes.

He took my hand, and then we were strolling again, back towards the house.

"My mother and sisters would never. And my brothers are not gay."

"I don't think your brothers would ogle me, Edward."

"Not intentionally. But if for a fleeting moment, they were to think of you… I don't wish to kill my siblings."

I couldn't stop myself from laughing that time. "Emmett's got Rosalie and Jasper's got Alice. If they were to see too much of me, they would be mortified, not aroused."

He turned to face me, his hands on my shoulders, his expression stern. "Do you consider me an ignorant man, Bella? A blind man? You don't see yourself clearly, I understand this, but do not insult my intelligence by putting yourself down to me, ever again."

He took my hand and started to walk away, but I held firm. I didn't even budge. He whipped around and eyed me questioningly.

"Hold up a sec," I said, a bit indignantly. "Do you see yourself clearly? Do you realize how gorgeous and amazing you are?"

He rolled his eyes. "That's different," he muttered. He tried to walk away again, but I tightened my grip on his hand and gave a yank, effectively bringing him back to right in front of me.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. How is it different?"

He sighed in exasperation. "It just is."

"No, it's not. Do you think I'm a stupid woman? Or blind?"

There was the slightest hint of a smile from him then. "No. I do not."

I had made my point. I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him, then whispered against his lips, "I'll try to ease up on the self bashing, okay?"

He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me towards him. His eyes were smoldering again. "Thank you."

Smiling, I gave him one last quick peck, then disentangled myself from his embrace. "Race 'ya!"

I didn't even wait for his response. I just took off.

I could hear him behind me, but I remained in the lead for almost the entire trip back to the cabin. Maybe I was faster than him. That was saying something. No one was faster than Edward.

But then, at the last moment, he pulled up beside me and slung me up onto his back.

Okay, yeah, I was wrong. I wasn't even close to as fast as him. Clearly, he had been letting me win.

I clung to him, nuzzling and nipping at his neck, laughing when his strides would falter.

We finished the distance within minutes, even with him slowing due to the affections I was assaulting him with.

Yards from the house, he stopped and set me onto my feet. His grin left me with little doubt. Retaliation was imminent.

Playful Edward was just too much fun.

He took my hand, then led me into the house.

"What the—?"

"Shut up, Em!" Edward and I both said in unison. We didn't even hesitate as we marched straight into the bedroom and slammed the door.

And then Edward got this strange look in his eyes. Like he was the predator and I was the prey. I wasn't at all scared. I just smirked back at him, almost challengingly.

The man had lightening fast reflexes. Next thing I knew, he leapt, and we were both landing on the bed. It creaked in protest.

"Since your clothes are already ruined," he murmured as he buried his face in my neck.

My shirt and pants ended up in shreds beside the bed. But, then, so did his.

It started out raw and frantic, but ended in a loving, sensual dance of sorts. And then we just held each other, caressing as we basked in our love for each other.

"I told you it would all work out," I whispered.

"Hmmm. I will never doubt you again."

"Could I get that in writing?"

Laughter from the living room.

"I think we should probably be a little less antisocial," I suggested. "I'm sure they have questions." I laughed when I heard Alice squeak excitedly.

Propping himself up on an elbow, Edward stared down on me as he brushed the back of his fingers against my cheek. "I'm a selfish man, Bella. I expected it would be months before we could be together like this. I don't wish to share you."

"What are a few hours to us now? A blink in time," I said, answering my own question. Then I gave him a little nudge and moved to leave the bed. I smirked to myself when I heard him groan.

I grabbed my suitcase and effortlessly flung it up onto the bed. Before I could even open it, he stepped up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist.

"Dress quickly, my love. The sooner we spend time with them, the sooner I will have you all to myself again."

I swatted his hands away playfully. "I can get dressed faster without you attached to me."

Begrudgingly, he released me and went to the closet. He had just pulled on his slacks when I clicked the locks on my case and threw it open.

And then I froze. Tensed. My mouth filled with venom. My throat burned.

_Burned_!

Every article of clothing smelled like me. Not _vampire me_, but _human me_.

Edward slammed the suitcase shut, then wedged himself between me and it as he wrapped me in a tight embrace. He was restraining me.

"Love, I'm sorry. I should have realized…"

It was a weird thought, not that I was thinking much right then. I wanted to kill and feed on my former self.

Five footsteps approached the door.

"No! She's not decent! Just give me a moment. Bella? You can do this. Hold your breath."

I did, and then I heard the footsteps of a sixth person, in and out of the third room down the hall and then up to the door.

"It's just me," Alice said as she let herself in. "I'm just going to get her suitcase. Here. These should fit her. They're Rosalie's."

I was aware that Alice was removing my case from the bed, but I didn't respond to it in any way. I was locked down, not breathing, trying to ignore the desire to rip apart my own husband to get to the scent of something that wasn't even tangibly there.

"I'll just go run these through the wash a half a dozen times."

I heard the door close. I heard our family speaking, but ignored their words. I needed to focus.

"No. I'm not letting her go until she is in control, and I can't get her dressed until I let her go."

He was answering to someone's thoughts, I realized.

"I will not embarrass her like that. You're not coming in until she's dressed."

I blinked and locked eyes with him, still not breathing. It was as if I had just noticed him there after hours of seeing him standing right in front of me. My head cleared a little, but the fire in my throat remained.

"Bella?" He wasn't asking me a question. He was trying to determine my level of self-control.

So was I. "Why—?"

"Sshh, don't speak. Just hold your breath. A human's scent will permeate their clothing. Even after laundering them, the scent will often linger. Your instincts triggered, telling you the scent was synonymous with blood."

I expressed an apology with my eyes alone, then pressed my forehead against his chest. The burn was easing slightly.

"You needn't apologize, Bella. You are doing amazingly well. I should be the one apologizing to you. I should have foreseen this reaction and taken precautions. I'm so sorry."

"Son, none of us considered the possibility. You're being too hard on yourself."

I shifted a little and nodded emphatically at Edward, agreeing with what Carlisle had said from the other side of the door. I didn't want him to feel guilty. He hadn't done anything wrong. By what Carlisle had said, and by the additional murmurings I could hear so easily, our family clearly felt the same way.

I needed to get past this. I couldn't hold my breath forever. Well, I could, but I could imagine how annoying that would be. And I couldn't reassure Edward that he wasn't at fault for anything if I couldn't speak.

If I was so amazing, as everyone seemed to think I was, then surely I could handle it. It wasn't even blood. It was just unmistakably human. And it wasn't even in the room anymore.

I at least needed to manage enough control so that I could put some clothes on.

I conveyed all of this through my stare alone. Edward gave a slight nod, then held me tighter.

My eyes still on his, I took in a slow, deep breath. The burning flared a little, but I didn't feel lost to it as I had before. If anything, I just felt a determination to conquer it.

"It feels like someone's shoved a branding iron down my throat," I rasped. "How could you stand to be so close to me?"

"I wasn't a newborn when I met you, Bella, but it was not without difficulty."

Suddenly, every pertinent memory of our time together rushed to the forefront of my mind. Every moment we had ever shared when there was pain within his expression. He had been through so much, all in the name of love.

I tugged my arms against his hold, letting him know that I wanted him to release me. I could have just yanked them free, but I didn't. I wanted him to feel safe, and comfortable knowing I wasn't about to do something stupid. Like try to rip his head off or go bolting from the house in nothing but my birthday suit.

After searching my eyes for a moment, he eventually loosened his firm grip. I threw my arms around him when he did.

"I'm sorry for putting you through that," I whispered.

"Bella…" He sighed my name. He raked his fingers through my hair. "I was happy to endure that and more, if it meant being with you."

"Gag! I'm out here hurling up last night's hunt! Would you just throw on some clothes already and get the hell out here?"

"Shut up, Emmett!" we both called out, then we pulled back and grinned at each other. Edward's faded quickly, though.

"Are you still hurting, my love?"

I shook my head, which was a bit of a lie. "Second by second it gets a little better." That was the truth. "Reminders make it worse. Just… distract me. Where are Rosalie's clothes I'm borrowing?"

We located them on the bed. Edward threw on a shirt as I pulled them on. They were a tad too big – Rosalie was definitely taller than me – but they fit well enough. Then we walked hand in hand towards the door.

Six faces greeted us when we opened it. Emmett and Alice were smiling. Carlisle and Esme seemed happy but slightly concerned. Jasper looked confused and frustrated. Rosalie appeared to be feeling guilty about something.

We pushed our way through, then all of us headed for the living room.

Good thing vampires don't need sleep. We all ended up talking until just before the break of dawn.

Carlisle found my hallucinations of Natas to be fascinating, just as Edward had predicted. Well, they all did, actually, though no one could figure out why I'd had them.

Emmett and Rosalie were the first to excuse themselves.

Apparently, my arm wrestling match with Emmett was still on, and I promised him that he could tag along when I hunted polar bears for the first time. He was near giddy over that.

Rosalie hadn't said much during our hours-long conversation, but as she stood to leave, she surprised me.

"I don't agree with your decision, Bella, but I respect it. I respect the love you have for my brother, and the care you took in making it."

When I thanked her, she smiled, just a little, then grabbed Emmett's hand and pulled him towards their room.

Nearly an hour later, Jasper and Alice were the next to break off from our group discussion.

Jasper had done little else beyond stare at me with a perplexed look on his face. I felt bad for the confusion I was causing him, but couldn't find a way to apologize for it. At least he no longer looked at me like he was afraid he'd kill me.

Alice shared several visions with me that she'd had over the past few days. My favorite was of me and Edward running through our meadow back in Forks. We would be returning to Forks someday! It made me optimistic that maybe, just maybe, I'd get to see Charlie again. Maybe even my mom.

Edward and I chatted with Esme and Carlisle for about an hour after that.

My father-in-law is a wise man. He'd already come up with a theory for why I had such amazing self-control. It was my gift. Not as cool as Edward's or Alice's, but I'd take it. The crazed newborn phase was something I had not at all been looking forward to. Having this gift meant I would get to bypass it altogether.

We were set to part ways as the sun started to lighten the blackness of the sky, when a memory hit me. It was amazing how much I could remember, now that my mind was so vast. I felt that I could have memorized every book in existence, remembered every experience there was to have, and still have had room left for more. Like an infinite gigabyte hard drive on a computer.

"Carlisle?"

He stopped at the mouth of the hallway and turned to face me. "Yes, Bella?"

"When I stayed with you guys for those two weeks? When I was leaving, you said something to me." His smile grew. He knew what I was referring to, but I said it anyway. "You thanked me. Why?"

He stepped towards me, then placed his hands on my shoulders and sighed. "For coming into our lives. But more importantly, for breathing life into Edward. He deserves the happiness you bring him. You both deserve the happiness you bring each other."

He gave my chin a gentle pinch before he walked away. Edward pulled me tighter against him and kissed the top of my head.

It felt weird that he had thanked me, when it was me who should have been thanking him. All of them. Edward specifically.

Before meeting Edward Cullen, my life had been little more than a mere existence. It wasn't horrible, but it was nothing special. It just… _was_.

Now, I feel like I belong. I feel loved, and protected, and… right. I finally feel right in my own skin.

How do you thank someone for giving you absolutely everything you'll ever want or need for all of eternity?

I started by writing down our love story…

Waylon Forge was dead, my parents were leaving town to tend to the funeral, and I was being shipped off to stay with the Cullens for two weeks. Residing with the most reclusive family on the west coast was bound to be an experience I'd never forget…

**The End**

**Author's Note:**

Okay, guys (and gals), what did we think? I reworked the ending on this about a dozen different ways, but could never get it 'quite right'. I'm not one hundred percent jazzed with this ending, either, but I tend to get ultra-critical of myself at the end of a project, because I subconsciously (and consciously) don't want to see it end. So, it's probably not actually 'bad'… but, then again, maybe it is.

It sucks when you take a journey, and then when you get to the destination, you're all: WTF?

Am I right? Yeah, I'm right. I'm sorry if you're all: 'WTF?' right now.

Really, this is the kind of story that could have just kept going and going and going and… I had to end it somewhere… no, really, I did.

I don't usually share alternate endings, but one idea I had that didn't work out was kinda cute, so I'll share it…

**X**

I started by writing down our love story.

I know you were there, but at least you now know what I was thinking, right?

Oh, and if you're reading this right now, and your name isn't Edward Cullen… this was a work of fiction.

**X**

And it is now with a heavy heart that I say goodbye. I will try to write another Twilight fic soon, but until then…

Thanks for all the great feedback and support, and MTLBYAKY


	36. Scraps and Snippets

**Two Weeks**

Story Scraps

By: Jana~

**XXX**

Okay, I never do this, but due to the overwhelming response I've received for this story, I have decided to break my own rules.

Sometimes, for various reasons, certain scenes and/or lines don't make it into one of my fics. I maybe decided the scene didn't work, or the dialog wasn't quite right, or I just simply went a different way. Whatever the reason, I usually have a doc file opened down in the task bar where all the scraps go.

The following are those scraps. These are rough draft, please keep in mind.

**XXX**

(This is a slightly different version of a scene in chapter eighteen…)

"I only want for your happiness—"

"And you won't leave my side unless I order you away," I added, interrupting him. "Are you expecting me to? Do you want me to?"

"No. But you should."

He sounded so sure. So absolute. Fear shot through me.

"Why?"

He just stared back at me. The darkness made it difficult to tell, but his eyes seemed to carry a firm sadness. Firm in his resolve, and sad because of it. I was sure I looked scared to death. I didn't want to have this conversation anymore. I never wanted to have it in the first place. But right then, especially, all I wanted was for him to gather me into his arms and tell me it was going to be okay.

He didn't. And he didn't answer me, either. He just made a request.

"Tell me why you came home early today."

He knew. Even with the inability to read my mind, he knew. And he was using that knowledge to answer my question without having to say the words himself.

It was all so obvious, finally, that I felt the urge to smack myself in the forehead and scream: Duh!

He wasn't worried that I wouldn't choose the prong he was on at the fork in the road. He was trying to give me an out. He was trying to guide me towards the less difficult path, all in an effort to _save_ me. But I didn't want to be saved _from_ him. I wanted to be saved _by_ him. He was the only one who _could_ save me.

"You think I'm perceptive, but really, I'm not. Something clicked, in the middle of class, and I had a moment of panic."

"You _are_ perceptive. Amazingly so. At times, to someone as astute as you, the obvious can be overlooked."

I didn't want compliments. I didn't want to tiptoe around the subject anymore. And I didn't want to be high in a tree, miles above the ground. I felt limited. Trapped.

"Can we continue this conversation at a lower elevation?"

Alarm flashed across his expression. "Are you afraid?"

I wasn't.

**XXX**

(This is an early version of a scene in chapter twenty-two. If memory serves, I wrote this scrap long before I was even up to chapter twenty-two, hence the need to change it slightly…)

My confusion was obvious to him. He sighed as he looked away. "You don't realize the danger you are in."

What? I was in danger? "In what way am I in danger?"

"I still don't know if I can control myself," he said. When he locked eyes with me again, I saw the pain return to his expression.

"I know you can," I assured him. And I was sure of that. He would never hurt me. He was far too protective of me to allow that to happen.

"You excite me, Bella. I am unable to think clearly when you do."

My heart began pounding, seeking escape from my chest. Because it was, the danger he was trying to hint at refused to click into place.

I _excited_ him!

"I can wait a little longer. Until you acclimate."

He scoffed sadly. Frustrated. "Acclimation isn't the only issue."

I still wasn't able to grasp the problem. "What's the other issue? Or issues?"

"I could _hurt_ you, Bella. I would never do so intentionally, but intentions mean little when one isn't thinking clearly."

Oh! Oh God. Okay, so, if he were to become _excited_, he might not remember his own strength, and subsequently my frailty. If he lost his sense of self, while in the throes of passion, he might _accidentally_ hurt me. If he were… on top of me – that thought was more than just a little appealing – he might crush me. Break a bone or something.

"Okay, I think I get what you mean," I said. "But, couldn't we just… I don't know… find some kind of alternative?"

He quirked an eyebrow, and I burst into flames. I was _way_ too embarrassed to spell it out for him.

**XXX**

(This scene would have taken place in chapter twenty-three, instead of Eric looking for the high-five from Edward, and Bella falling out of her seat on purpose as a distraction. I wanted to start showing that her friends would be including Edward in their little clique, but the scene seemed a little off and ran long, so I decided to simplify and go a different way…)

"He's a classically trained pianist," I interjected proudly. Then I pulled my iPod out of my pocket and cued up the fifth numbered track… one of my favorites. I passed it over, and Angela and Eric each took an earbud to listen.

Both of their jaws dropped.

"Dude, this is _you_? Seriously?"

"He's not just playing it," I bragged, "he composed it."

"Okay, dude, sorry, but I gotta see this!" Eric handed me back my iPod, then he stood and gestured for us to follow him. Angela did immediately.

Fear shot through me. I'm not sure why. Maybe because I didn't know what the hell was going on.

My concerns eased somewhat when Edward smiled at me and offered me his hand.

"Guys! C'mon!"

The whole cafeteria looked at Eric when he shouted from across it. Edward chuckled.

"Relax," he whispered as we moved to catch up. "His thoughts are without malice."

The music room held the usual crowd. The arts department at Forks High was small, so there was only the one room, shared by both the band and the choir. The two subjects alternated periods, taught by the same teacher.

Everyone stared at us as we entered. Eric didn't seem to notice. Either that or he didn't care. He strode over to the piano in the corner confidently, then gave it a few pats as he waited for Edward to join him.

"You need sheet music?" he asked.

Edward shook his head. He didn't let go of my hand until we were both seated on the bench. I wasn't exactly comfortable sitting beside him when all the attention in the world – it seemed – was on him, but maybe he needed me to be there. Maybe he was nervous. There was no way to tell if he was. His eyes just looked determined. Maybe even a little amused.

Even the teacher was watching curiously from her desk.

Edward hit a few keys first, then winced slightly. "It's a little out of tune," he said. A few of the kids chuckled. It seemed to me that they were just waiting for him to suck. The air felt thick with condescension.

His hands lingered over the keys for a moment before he began. He didn't need to be nervous. I was nervous enough _for_ him.

I recognized the song instantly, as soon as the first notes filled the room. My lullaby.

The atmosphere changed within seconds. I could hear impressed murmurings. People lingering nearby, outside, started hovering in the doorway. The teacher stood and approached.

If the piano _was_ out of tune, it was undetectable to human ears. Or at least to _my_ ears. It sounded flawless to me, as usual.

As the final cord drifted into silence, the entire room erupted into applause.

"Dude has mad skills!" Eric announced. He was absolutely ecstatic, like he had just found the next amazing undiscovered talent.

The teacher closed the distance as Edward and I both left the bench and stood.

"I don't believe I've ever heard that piece before," she said.

"It's an original composition, ma'am," Edward replied.

She was highly impressed by that. I could see it in her eyes, which then shifted down to his name badge.

"Cullen?" she asked. "Dr. Carlisle Cullen's son?"

"Yes, ma'am."

**XXX**

(This is an early version of a scene in chapter twenty-eight. I wrote this long before I was at chapter twenty-eight, so it needed to be tweaked once I got there…)

"I have a present for you."

My eyes shot open. But then I just stared at the ceiling.

I pushed my thoughts aside and gave Edward my full attention. His eyes were imploring as he extended a wrapped box towards me.

"Please," he said, like he was begging me not to reject him. Like if I did, it would wound him.

How could I say no? Uncomfortably, reluctantly, I reached out and accepted it.

I almost didn't want to open it. Not because I was afraid of what was inside, but because the wrapping was so elegant, it seemed like a crime to rip it. So I didn't. I carefully slipped my finger under each taped fold until the box within was finally freed. I literally gasped when I lifted the lid.

The bracelet appeared to be made of white gold, and attached to it was a clear crystal heart pendant. At least I hoped it was crystal. If it was a diamond, it would have cost millions.

"Please," he said again. Then he gently removed the piece of jewelry from its box and held it out to me, like he was asking permission to put it on me.

I raised my arm. "Please tell this isn't a diamond." He just grinned as he clipped it around my wrist. "Edward, seriously, tell me it's not. Lie to me if you have to."

"It's not a diamond, my love. I suspected such a gift would make you uncomfortable."

I sighed with relief. Then I settled my attention on the, what I assumed to be, symbolic heart, taking in its beauty. "Thank you," I whispered.

He seemed pleased. Happy. And not just because I liked it.

After a little less than ten days, he already knew me so well. He knew my first inclination would be to refuse his gift. I almost did. It's hard to receive when you have nothing to give in return. I was glad I didn't.

As I admired it, he sat beside me, right up against me, his arm encircling my waist. And then he got affectionate.

Brushing my hair back behind my ear, he began nuzzling and planting gentle kisses. On my temple, my cheek, my ear. My breath caught in anticipation when I thought he was heading for my neck. I tilted my head a little, hopefully, but he didn't take the cue. I didn't have time to feel disappointed for long.

As soon as his lips touched mine, tentatively, I threw my arms around his neck and pulled myself into him. That got a reaction out of him. He intensified the kiss, and then we were reclining. His hands began to roam, but like before, he was careful where he touched me. Propriety sucked. I wanted more. I felt like a dying plant, and he was the water that would save me from death.

It was a desperate move, I admit, but I had to try. I broke the kiss and brushed a path towards his neck. But I didn't get very far.

He created space between us and sighed. "Bella, no."

"I know you're worried, but you can do this. I know you can."

He sighed again. "I appreciate your faith in me, but I won't take chances with your safety."

"If I promise not to bite?"

"No. I know you have needs, and I want to please you, but patience is a must."

His words allowed for a sliver of optimism. "Maybe… in time?"

"I will not make a promise when I am uncertain if I can keep it. But, yes. Possibly. In time."

My heart swelled to almost bursting. I clung to the thread of hope like it was a lifeline. "Thank you," I whispered.

He kissed me again, but it was bordering on chaste. He was slowing things down, trying to bring us both back from the edge of frenzy we had been teetering on. It worked.

We fell into a comfortable position and silence, me snuggled up to him, my head resting on his chest. I was tired enough to go to sleep, but I fought it. It was too early still. I hadn't even had dinner yet, which was being prepared. The smells coming from downstairs kept my head in focus.

"Is it symbolic? The heart?"

"Yes. It symbolizes my love for you."

Simple, but perfect. I sighed contentedly in response.

"I wanted to give you something to serve as a reminder. I want you to always remember that I love you, even during the brief but inevitable moments when I can't be with you."

The extreme emotions that followed stole my breath and voice. Actions would have to convey my gratitude.

I pushed myself further up and nuzzled against his neck. He didn't even try to stop me. Maybe because he realized that I wasn't trying to seduce him. And I wasn't. I just wanted him to know how much I loved him. How much his words had meant to me.

I inhaled his scent, dizzy as I became intoxicated by it.

**XXX**

(This is what I originally wrote near the top of chapter thirty. After showing it to my beta, she said – and this is actually kind of funny – "He's always talking about propriety, and he just got through telling her about having ice tea on the front porch. This might be too much too fast." I'm paraphrasing, but that was the gist. Anyway, I decided she was right and rewrote it…)

His only response was to grip at me tighter. That was my answer. I went with it.

I found a rhythm, then began nibbling and kissing. Licking and sucking.

He liked it, if his moans were any indication. But the thing that surprised me a little bit was, _I_ liked it, too. Every time I moved a certain way, tingles of pleasure shot through me.

I moved that way a lot, and then Edward's hands were on my waist and he was helping me move.

It was frantic, and raw, and perfect. It felt _amazing_.

His moans turned to grunts, and I knew he was close.

"Tell me when," I breathed.

He was just waiting for me to do it, I realized, based off his pained, whispered groan.

"Bella, _please_…"

I bit down as hard as I could without breaking my teeth.

He _roared_, and then I was on my back, and he was between my legs. The frantic grinding continued.

I offered myself to him as he nuzzled my neck.

I trusted him. Absolutely. Unequivocally. He wouldn't hurt me. He couldn't.

The only thing I did do – and maybe it was a subconscious attempt to survive – was whisper words of reminder.

"I love you, Edward. I trust you."

His control was firmly in place. He slowed his movements, lovingly kissed my pounding jugular vein, then rolled off of me.

Before I could feel disappointed, his hand took over the task.

**XXX**

(I jotted down several variations of the ending to this fic through the weeks. Some lines were identical. Some made it into the fic and some didn't. These are those snippets…)

"I wouldn't even know where to begin. I'm thinking a million things all at once."

My mind literally felt like it was humming. Vibrating. Every significant moment of the last two weeks – which was almost every moment of the last two weeks – was replaying inside my head. It was like watching fourteen movies all at once, with the remote poised at the ready. Fast forwarding, pausing, slowing down, skipping ahead, backing up.

I was trying to fill in gaps. Trying to make sense of the things that didn't make sense to me before. Reasoning through stuff that I had pushed to the back of my mind at the time so that I could deal with other issues.

"Bella, please, if you value my sanity…"

I started with the first thought my racing brain could grasp. "The compromise to biting me was giving me a hickey?"

"Yes."

"But then you were upset with yourself for it."

I looked over at him then, wanting to gauge his reaction. He seemed remorseful, almost ashamed.

"It was a lapse in judgment. I had not considered the mark it would leave on your skin."

Why did he always have to talk in circles? "So then the compromise wasn't to give me a hickey."

"The compromise was to show you affection without biting you. I got… carried away."

I smirked at that, but attempted to hide it from him by looking back up at the overcast sky.

Then I snatched another racing thought out of my head.

"Thursday night, when Alice winked at you… You said a decision was made that she did not foresee?"

"Yes."

Always with the clipped answers, no elaboration.

I sighed. "Don't make me drag it out of you, Edward. You were willing to… _you_ _know_… and then you changed your mind. Why?"

I sensed his movements, but I couldn't look at him. I was too embarrassed. Too nervous. I continued to watch the gloom above me.

"Bella, I think you misunderstood." He draped an arm across me as he scooted up against me. "Never was it my intention to dishonor you. I wanted to please you. I wanted to see if it was possible. Your plea… I felt my self-control slipping."

I struggled to process all he had said. Alice was right. His way of explaining did sidestep important details.

"Okay, so, you weren't planning on…?" My face burst into flames. I couldn't say the words.

He gathered me into his arms. He knew what I meant.

"No," he whispered. "I was attempting to find a compromise we both could live with."

A vague thought niggled. My head started spinning, trying to access a specific memory without enough data to complete the search.

Finally, it clicked.

"Jasper. The conversation you had with him."

"Yes. His suggestion seemed reasonable. A compromise we both could live with."

And that was really what it all came down to with us. A series of compromises. But, really, would it be any different if Edward were human? Different issues, definitely, but still… Wasn't that the base of most relationships? Give and take?

He propped himself up on his elbow and stared down at me. "Is it a compromise you can live with?"

Honestly, someday, I was hoping for more. A gradual progression to something more closely resembling…

I reached out to stroke his cheek as I smiled up at him. "For now."

He smiled back at me, and then he was kissing me. Gently. Gratefully. Lovingly. Passionately.

"I love you, Bella. I will always love you."

So much about my life was up in the air. My dad's happiness. My relationship with my mom. If I would get a mere lifetime or an eternity with Edward.

But that I knew. He loved me, and he always would. And I would always love him.

After knowing Edward Cullen for only fourteen days, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him.

"I know," I whispered. "I love you, too."

In the hours that followed, we expressed our love for each other physically, in a variety of ways that left me breathless each and every time. A certain level of propriety stood firm, but boundary lines became blurred and stretched.

His hands against my bare skin felt amazing, though they never ventured to where I wanted them the most. He saved those touches for over clothes. Still, it was progress. It made me optimistic about the future.

He seemed nervous to, but he even allowed me to reciprocate. His self-control never faltered.

Acclimation.

I grinned goofily as I snuggled up against him. It had been the perfect escape. My problems at home weren't going anywhere. They could wait a little while longer.

"Did I please you, my love?"

I chuckled a little. My voice sounded hoarse. "Multiple times."

Yeah, I was hoarse. I wasn't really surprised, though. I was rather vocal, since we were in such a desolate area. He had been, too, but of course his voice was as flawless as ever.

"Did _I_ please _you_?" I asked.

He pulled me tighter against him, if that were even possible. It almost felt like we were one person.

"Yes. Always."

The sun was starting to set. We would have to leave soon. A pang of sadness inched in, threatening to shatter my joy.

**X**

"I love you, Bella. I will always love you."

So much about my life was up in the air. My dad's happiness. My relationship with my mom. If I would get a mere lifetime or an eternity with Edward.

But that I knew. He loved me, and he always would.

Through the days, weeks, and months ahead – through the years ahead – Edward would be my constant. My anchor. The gravitational pull, keeping me on the planet.

After fourteen days of knowing Edward Cullen, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him.

"I love you, too," I whispered back.

**X**

Okay, what the hell? Not only could I not add two plus two plus two, but I also couldn't add three plus three? Which, ironically, equated to the same answer.

It was all so simple. Why had I not thought of it before? He could _change_ me. It solved every problem! I would never grow old. Never die and leave him behind. He wouldn't be in pain around me. We could be intimate without fear of him hurting me. We could be together forever.

I craned my neck, invitingly. I knew there would be pain involved, but that was only the smaller picture. The bigger picture remained my focus.

And then I felt his lips leave my skin.

"Trusting little human, offering herself to me."

He sounded like he was teasing me. I locked eyes with him, deadly serious, and the smile left his face.

"Bella, no."

"Why not? It solves everything. Every problem."

"That would not be a solution. It would be a tragedy."

"Why? If I were like you—"

"No." He sounded so absolute. "I won't end your life for you."

"But it's not an ending. It's a beginning."

"That's what you call a beginning? Becoming a monster?"

"You're not a monster, Edward. And I'd like to think I wouldn't be one, either."

"You don't know what you're saying. You don't want this."

"I want to be with you. Forever."

"Is it not enough, just to have a long and happy life with me?"

I wasn't going to win this battle. At least not today. "If that's all you're willing to give me, then yes."

He gathered me into his arms then, both offering and seeking comfort.

Waylon Forge had died, my parents left town to tend to the funeral, and I was shipped off to stay with the Cullens for two weeks. Residing with the most reclusive family on the west cost was bound to be an experience I'd never forget.

Little did I know…

It was life changing.

**X**

(This was jotted down _very_ early on in the writing of this fic…)

I could see then what he had been talking about before. About them being able to lure their victims. I was craning my neck, offering myself to him. I didn't want to die – I knew Edward wouldn't kill me – but the alternative…

I opened my eyes as I felt his lips leave my skin.

"Trusting little human, offering herself to me."

There was amusement in his tone, but his eyes showed something else.

"I guess I was," I whispered. "Have you ever thought about that? What it might be like to change me?"

**XXX**

(This was an idea I had for a scene in the epilogue. I didn't include it because it just didn't flow with what else I had planned…)

I almost caved to his pleas once. I just wanted to see him happy and smiling again.

Fortunately, Alice talked sense into me. Edward had gone hunting, and she and Esme had stayed behind. When I told them what I was considering – which was essentially to wait a few more years, for Edward's sake – Alice advised against it.

"_You will only be prolonging his pain if you do. He's never going to be okay with this, until after it happens. I wish you could see my visions. You guys are going to be so happy!"_

I didn't want to prolong his pain. I was near desperate to ease it. And I wanted us to be happy again. I wanted us to be the couple Alice saw in her visions, running through the meadow, playful and laughing. Carefree.

Later that night, when Edward had returned home with his brothers, and he had plucked mine and Alice's previous conversation out of her head…

Well, it was a bad night. He was livid with her for convincing me to go ahead with my original plans. I had never heard him yell like that before. He broke up half the house in his fury. When he got up to our room, I thought for sure I would be next. I had braced myself for it. But his wrath never came.

Apparently, I wasn't the one he had been angry with.

**XXX**

(Random scenes/lines I liked enough to jot down and save...)

"Your soul is too steep a price for a few moments of pleasure."

**X**

(This snippet comes from an idea I had, to have Jessica follow Bella into the woods at some point and catch her with Edward. This would have been the setup for that…)

"Hi'ya, Bells! Have a nice _lunch_?"

There seemed to be a bit of animosity in her tone, but also, smugness. Like she had a secret that was just bursting inside her, but that she would never tell. Since she wasn't usually one for keeping secrets, I could only assume doing so was for her benefit.

**X**

I understood. Or at least I thought I did.

"I must learn to control myself. We can't—"

Wait. He stopped abruptly, but I caught the meaning behind the partial statement. I had wondered if intimacy would ever be possible with him, but it seemed we had made some progress with that. I was starting to think it might be possible. After he acclimated.

"We can't?" I asked.

"I won't risk your safety, Bella. I can't."

**XXX**

And that concludes all my ramblings, scraps, and snippets. There are a few more, but they basically made it into the fic word for word, so there's no point in posting them here.

I want to take this opportunity to thank everyone for the amazing reviews I have received for this fic. I am truly humbled by all your kind words and compliments. I sincerely hope my new fic, _Harvest Moon_, lives up to everyone's expectations. I will strive not to disappoint.

Also, if anyone is interested, I've created two Twilight fan videos that I've posted on YouTube. My username there is: janaonwheels

I'm not great at making videos, but I'm proud of what I've done.

Still not smoking, for those who were following my progress with that. Thanks for all the well wishes!

MTLBYAKY

Jana~


	37. Chapter Eight from Edward's POV

**Author's Note:**

Okay, I know I'm probably beating a dead horse here…

Actually, that's a really violent expression. Let me rephrase.

I just couldn't let the sleeping baby lie.

Yeah, that's not much better. You should always let sleeping babies get their needed rest.

Hmmm…

Okay, I have problems. There. Simple. Precise. To the point.

This is chapter eight of this fic (_**Two Weeks**_), but from Edward's POV. Why? I don't know. It hit me, so I ran with it. My muse hates it when she throws something at me and I don't catch it and run with it. I don't like pissing her off.

And, to be honest, I had considered writing this fic from start to finish from Edward's POV, but wasn't sure if people would want to read that. Had a title picked out and everything… (_**Fourteen Days**_, in case you were wondering)… but I figured it might get boring in spots – repetitious and all that – so I decided not to do it… at least for the time being. But my muse would _not_ leave me alone about chapter eight. So, here it is.

I literally, seriously, absolutely and without question, wrote this for my own amusement. It's _rough_, probably OOC, and, really, it pretty much sucks. The _only_ reason I'm posting it, is because when I told my beta that this was how I had wasted my day in its entirety yesterday, she said: "You should post it as an 'outtake' – people love that stuff."

Yes, well, you don't have to love it – I would be surprised if you did, to be honest – but here it is, anyway. No flames please about how much it sucks… I'm aware that it does. It would be like telling someone who's on fire: "Hey, you're on fire."

Thanks for putting up with me, and MTLBYAKY

**XXX**

**Two Weeks**

Chapter Eight – Edward's POV (point of view)

By: Jana~

**XXX**

I could hear her on the stairs. I knew the exact moment she entered my room. The bed creaked beneath her light weight as she settled herself onto it. The keys on her laptop clicked as she typed.

Soon. Very soon, according to Alice's vision. Bella had already found the answer, she had simply dismissed it as impossible. Today, she would open her mind to the possibility. That small opening would allow the truth – the frightening truth – to finally sink in.

I was beyond apprehensive, but Alice assured me that Bella would be fine. That she could handle the truth of what I am. With Bella's tenacious spirit, I was inclined to believe her. The problem was, I wasn't as certain that _I_ could handle it.

An exasperated sigh.

A gasp of surprise.

Her heart started racing.

More typing.

Soon. Very, very soon.

Erratic breathing.

Too fast. Much too fast. She was going to hyperventilate if she didn't slow it down.

I almost went to her, but then I heard her take several long, deep breaths, followed by her weight shifting off the bed. Once she stood, she started to pace.

She knew. She knew and she was panicking. Alice had been wrong.

I saw her clearly as she approached the glass, but she did not see me. Not at first. It wasn't until she was about to turn away that she did. When our eyes locked, her body reacted.

She was no longer hyperventilating, but instead was gasping air sporadically, like she had forgotten how to breathe. Her heart was not just racing, but was skipping beats and straining to find any form of rhythm. Her sense of balance seemed unstable.

Contradicting all of those things, however, were her eyes. They stared back determinedly.

Had Alice been wrong? Maybe she hadn't been after all.

I held Bella's gaze as I pushed off the tree, and then for a few moments longer before turning and heading for the forest. I glanced back at her once, hoping to convey that I was inviting her to follow me. If she wasn't scared, if she was ready to talk, she would.

I didn't go far. I remained nearby, waiting. Listening. Hoping. Dreading.

And then I hid myself when I heard her run down the stairs and fly out of the house.

I watched as she got her bearings and entered the forest, but stayed ahead of her and out of sight, leading her further in. If she couldn't find her way back without my help, maybe she wouldn't run away from me.

Her steps became hesitant. Our depth into the woods and my silence were unsettling her. I didn't want that. I didn't want her to be frightened.

"Are you afraid?"

When I called out to her, she spun around several times, trying to locate me, but still I hid from her. If she was afraid, I would not scare her further by showing myself.

"Of you? No. If you were going to kill me, I'd be dead already."

Kill her? If I had doubts before, I didn't then. She knew. She knew and she wasn't running away from me.

I launched myself into the tree that was a few yards away and then dropped out of it, right in front of her. I instantly regretted doing so. Her heart pounded wildly in her chest and her breathing turned shaky.

"You're ready to talk." I said this in a soothing voice, hoping it would calm her. It didn't seem to. She stuttered her reply.

"I – I think so. I have a question first, though."

First? Before admitting what she knew? Like the calm before the storm? I raised one eyebrow at her, and for reasons I didn't understand, her tension eased marginally.

"If something was thought to be myth, could some of the facts be wrong?"

Most myths were far from factual. Most were ludicrous ramblings from superstitious storytellers and, in more recent centuries, fiction horror novelists. "Yes."

"Okay. What happens now?"

_I have no idea._ "What do you want to happen now?"

"I want to understand better, for starters."

_No, Bella, you don't. You only think you do._ "Before that can happen, I need to know what you've learned."

_Say it, Bella. Out loud. I can't confirm it until you say it._

"You're a vampire."

Nothing could have prepared me. It was like hearing the purest of angels shout an obscenity. I would have wept, had I been able to. Instead, I froze. It wasn't like I had to keep up the human charade anymore. She knew. But knowing wasn't the end of this nightmare. She was looking for me to confirm it.

I couldn't. Cowardly, I skirted it. "Ask your questions."

"How old are you really?"

Body or mind? "Seventeen."

"Okay, but, for how long have you been seventeen?"

Mind. But the answer might worry her. Sure, I looked seventeen, but I was, in actuality, so much older than that. I was older than her father. Older than any of her grandparents, were any still living.

She would come to the realization eventually, but until then… "A while."

"The garlic?"

"Myth."

"Sunlight?"

"Myth." _For the most part._

"Liquid diet?"

"Yes. But not in the way you think." _Not anymore._

"You don't kill people."

_Not anymore._ "No. We survive off the blood of animals."

"Myth?"

"No." _I wish it was._ "My family is different from others of our kind."

"So, there are other vampires out there who kill people?"

Many, many others. The numbers were frightening, really. "Yes."

"How did you become one?"

I kept it vague. The less she knew of the actual cause and effect, the better. "Carlisle. My mother had just died of Spanish Influenza, and I was dying of it. He thought he was saving me."

"You don't want to be one?"

No. I had never wanted to be one. Not ever. But never, ever since being one, had I ever been so desperate for a way back to humanity. "No. But that doesn't matter. I am one."

"Why? Why don't you want to be one?"

Wasn't it obvious? "I don't want to be a monster."

"You're not a monster."

I shifted my gaze to the ground. Her trusting eyes felt like a punishment I knew I deserved but couldn't bear. She had no idea. Because of her innate goodness, she thought she could see something decent in me.

I wanted to correct her… No, I knew I _should_ correct her, but before I could, I saw her take a step toward me. Panicked, I jumped into the nearest tree, the movement too fast for her to discern.

She looked this way and that before meekly calling my name. "Edward?"

"Up here."

Her eyes grew wider as she stared. Wondering. In awe.

"Did I upset you?" she asked.

"No." _You perplex me, but you did not upset me._

"Then why are you up in a tree?"

"You were coming to me." _And I panicked._

"Well, yeah. Is that not okay?"

Completely perplexing. For all her frailties, she really was brave. Amazingly, ridiculously brave. "Why aren't you scared?"

"Should I be?"

Any sane person would be. "Yes."

"Are you?"

In so many ways, I could not even begin to explain. "Terrified."

"You don't need to be," she said.

And yet I was.

"Please, come down?"

She made a simple request, and I found myself obeying like she ruled my universe. I stepped off the branch and landed in front of her. She gasped as I did so, surprised I assumed, but she recovered quickly and asked her next question.

"Why do you think I should be scared?"

_I don't _think_ you should be scared. You _should_ be scared._ "I could potentially end your life."

She shrugged, like this was of no consequence to her. "So could my dad. He owns a gun, what with him being the police chief and all. I'm not scared of him."

What a laughable argument. "He's not a wild monster, driven by instincts."

"So, your instincts are telling you to kill me?"

"Yes." _Please, if nothing else, grasp that one fact._

"But you fight against them," she said. "It's not about potential, Edward. It's about actions. You won't hurt me."

She truly believed that. She trusted me. She shouldn't, but she did. I should have felt ashamed for encouraging that trust. I didn't deserve it. But I wanted it.

She took another step toward me. I tensed and fought back the panic.

"Why can't I come near you? We've been near each other lots of times."

Yes, amazingly near. Her warmth… Her scent… _Focus_. "That was before you knew what I am."

"I don't care what you are. I mean, I do, but not in the way you think."

I forced a laugh from leaving my throat. What did she know of my thoughts? "And what do I think?"

"You think you're a monster. You think I should think that, too. But I don't. I care because you seem so tortured, and it saddens me that you are."

_No, please, Bella, don't be sad for me. I am not worth a moment of worry. Not worth a single tear._ She took yet another careful step toward me, and I steadied myself.

"Alice said I should ask you what _you_ can do."

Yes, and she would die later for that. I had hoped to avoid telling Bella that for now. Since I couldn't read _her_ mind, maybe she didn't have to know that I was a freak among freaks.

But she had asked, and I would not lie to her. "I can read minds."

Her heart began to race. It hadn't completely stabilized from before, and now it was worse, pounding so harshly it caused me concern. That concern escalated when she stopped breathing as well.

Why was her body trying to kill her? Why did she suddenly look embarrassed?

Oh. "Breathe, Bella. I can't read _your_ mind."

She took in a deep breath and blinked heavily. "You can't?" she asked.

"No. You are the exception. The _only_ exception."

She seemed affronted. With how embarrassed she was seconds before, I assumed she would have been grateful to learn this.

Would I ever understand this confusing woman?

"Is there something wrong with me?"

Apparently not.

How on earth had she come to that conclusion? I tried not to laugh, but the idea of it was just too humorous. "You're standing here, conversing with a vampire who can read minds, and you think there is something wrong with _you_?"

She shrugged. "Was just wondering why that was."

So was I. "I don't honestly know. It's very frustrating."

"You wish you could read my mind?"

"Yes. Every day, since the first day I met you. I could hear you inside your house, while your parents spoke with you and you with them, but I couldn't read your thoughts. I could read your parents', Renee's better than Charlie's, but then, with you… nothing. I thought I might be able to with a closer proximity to you, not that I have ever needed that before, but I still couldn't. For the entire drive to my house, I tried."

With her father, I could only make out the tenor, the tone of his thoughts. At the time, I attributed that to his grief, but perhaps I should not have dismissed it so quickly.

"Does anyone else in your family have… special talents?"

"Jasper can control moods." I paid little attention to my words when answering her. My mind was still on her father, and how heredity might have played a role in why I could not read Bella's thoughts.

"Like, if someone's upset, he can make them… not be?"

Simplistic explanation, but accurate enough. "Yes."

"He seems to be afraid of me."

_Not afraid _of_ you. Afraid of what he might do _to_ you._ "Jasper is the newest member of our family," I carefully explained. "A new vegetarian. It's difficult for him to be around humans."

"Vegetarian?"

_Not in the way that you are._ "That's what we call ourselves."

"Are there very many others like you?"

"No." Just the opposite, in fact. "It's a very difficult lifestyle to maintain."

"It is?" she asked, and I nodded. "Why?"

_Don't scare her. Just be point blank honest._ "Instincts."

She seemed to process that for a moment.

"So, Jasper's killed people before?"

_Here it comes. Brace yourself._ "Yes."

"Have you?"

_Yes, Bella, because I _am_ a monster. _How had she ever considered I might be an angel? I was the farthest thing from.

"You don't have to answer that."

Yes, I did. "Yes. But never innocents."

"I think I get what you mean…"

_Think?_ "I can read minds, Bella. My victims were always violent criminals."

"So, in a way, you were doing the world a favor."

_Please, no, don't rationalize it. Don't justify it._ "No, Bella. No. I had no right to do what I did. I had no right to play God, deciding who should live and who should die."

She didn't respond, only staring back at me for the longest time. Her deep brown eyes mesmerized me as a million thoughts I couldn't decipher flashed in them. "What are you thinking?"

"I think you're too hard on yourself. But I think you feel you need to be. You hold onto your guilt and self-hatred as a self-inflicted punishment."

Every part of her was simplistically perfect. Her beauty, her intelligence, her awareness, her compassion. Drawn to her, I took a step before realizing I should not.

"Why does Rosalie hate me?"

_Hate? _Hate was too strong a word. "She doesn't." Her expression changed. She didn't believe me. "You're not wrong, but it's not hate. One of the reasons has more to do with me than you," and was laughable, really, "and neither reason is mine to share with you."

"Is she and Emmett a couple?"

"Yes, as are Alice and Jasper."

"So, you're the only one who's alone?"

Utterly and painfully alone, for my entire existence, until three days ago. "Yes."

"Why?"

Why? Because Rosalie was not the match for me that Carlisle had hoped for. And then she found Emmett. Because Tanya, while beautiful, was little more than a succubus. Because… "I hadn't met you yet."

Suddenly, she looked completely unstable on her feet. She swayed a little, and I darted to her side, gathering her to me to steady her.

She looked up at me, her expressive eyes and a twitch of her lips telling me she had something she wanted to say, but nothing verbal followed. Her entire body trembled. Mine would have, too, were it capable.

"You don't know for how long I've waited for you."

That simple truth sent Bella's frail human body into some form of collapse. Her heart sounded dangerously close to arresting. She stopped breathing. It was instinctual for humans to breathe. Why was it not for her?

"Breathe, Bella."

She tried to, but she couldn't retain any sort of lasting pattern. And her heart rate refused to slow and regulate.

I broke Bella! This beautiful, fragile creature trusted me, and I had nearly killed her. I had nearly overwhelmed her to death.

I needed to fix her before her body failed her. I lifted her into my arms effortlessly, cradling her close to me in a protective and comforting manner.

"Hold on, and close your eyes."

She was unnerved enough. If she saw what was about to happen…

As soon as her eyes fluttered shut, I ran to my room. She needed to be somewhere warm and comfortable so that she could calm down. Taking her into the forest had been a bad idea.

"You can open your eyes now."

When she did, she startled noticeably. She hadn't expected to be in my room. I held her tighter, glad that I had requested she not watch. The rush of it might have caused her to go into psychogenic shock. She was on the verge of that as it was. Her heart continued to pound as if it was trying to escape her chest. The sound of it was almost deafening.

"Do you have super hearing, too?"

I contained my laugh as I set her down on my bed. I could not read her thoughts, but sometimes, it seemed as if she could read mine. While I knew she couldn't, the idea of it amused me.

"Yes."

If she was planning to ask me more questions, I needed to get her body calmed down first. The littlest things seemed to set it off, though not the logical things I assumed would have.

When she learned that I could potentially kill her, her heart rate barely elevated and her breathing became only a little shaky. But when I simply mentioned my long wait for her, she almost died. Her reactions, like her instincts, were backwards. Flipped.

I considered that in the second it took me to power on my stereo and return to her. Then, cautiously, as one of her favorite compositions of mine filled the room, I joined her on the bed.

After settling into a position similar to the one we had been in the night previous, I began a relaxed pattern of breathing. Humans often followed when led by example. For once, Bella actually did what other humans would have done. Her vitals seemed to improve a little with every passing moment.

"You don't need to breathe, do you?"

I smiled. Always curious. Only now, I could answer her questions. She knew. She knew and she wasn't running. "No."

"Where did your family go?"

Was she unnerved that we were alone? No, she didn't appear to be. Her heart rate was almost back to normal now and each breath was even and natural. "Out. They are allowing us some privacy."

"Who is it that might harm me because I know this? Is it other vampires?"

Harm. Harm Bella. I would singlehandedly destroy anyone who tried.

Pain and rage tangled and warred inside my mind. "Yes," I answered, but then said nothing further. I would not have been able to explain beyond that without frightening her.

I wasn't sure if she was intending to press for a more definitive response, but if she was, before she could, we were interrupted.

**XXX**

**Author's Note:**

So, yeah. Like I said. Sucks. I warned you! Did you read the note at the top? 'Cause that's where I warned everyone!

Anyway… back to writing chapter three of _**Harvest Moon**_. If my muse will let me! She keeps throwing random projects at me!

MTLBYAKY

Jana~


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